I do not ache with your absence.
I do not ache with your absense-
legs walk the same stride, tongues flick syllables,
Air is pressed into lungs and eyes see. We were never the same. We were never.

Wicked, wacked,
Watch as we about-face this perfect paring because
about now
the timer ive set will be going off and, GOD knows, we CANT brown the silly crust this time. *****. Fake ghosts and roaming shores, pack them and go $i die$ somewhere with more tranquil winds, quiet skies. Earth, with you i have coalesced- alas, fae tongues have yet to forget to grab ankles and pull.

I apologize for the imprints of my claws.

I wait upstairs in the hotel room
knowing he won't come~
to follow me would show a
sign of exasperated weakness~
emasculate the badge of pride
worn like epaulets upon
his war torn shoulders

I romance myself with Corona
on the king size bed and rehearse
to the surf how I might ever
get him to really like me,
knowing when he finally enters
I'll just sit with my face
turned in silent self depreciation,
so that this common division
can continue indefinitely

Written by Sara Fielder © Dec 2016

my little brother asks me how we’ll know
for sure when we’re really in love

I tell him probably when
that question no longer needs asking~

at the same time saying he loves me
over and over like I need convincing

if he could just admit we haven’t got it in us
then delete his thread of texts
like he never existed

Written by Sara Fielder © Nov 2016

he replaced the washer,
the refrigerator too

he liked new appliances; they
reminded him of her

especially when he opened the freezer and found
not a pint of her Haagen-Dazs Vanilla

the new washer contained old ghosts as well
for he blasphemed her by washing on hot

a prohibition when she was still here, for fear
of shirts shrinking, she always claimed

he wondered what words of hers would haunt him
when he gutted the wall for a new oven

maybe it would just be the longing for the smell
of cookies baking  (chocolate chip)

the ones she prepared for the grandsons, the day
she took a "quick nap" and never woke up