You will be my heart's greatest disappointment.
You will leave me
When I think I'm ready--
But never escape me.
You will know me enough
To never forget me--
But not enough to resent me.
And perhaps that will be our greatest mistake.
This will be my life's great affair,
Cut short by time and circumstance
And, maybe, a fear of ruining something good.
Years later, in the arms of another man,
I will remember the feel of your hand in my hair;
And perhaps, wherever you are
You will remember how it felt
To comfort me late at night,
Knowing nothing but us two.
It will not always be so sad--
In a sense it will be like always having Paris,
Not quite as grandiose,
But just as passionate, as urgent
And filled with tenderness, or even love--
The unspoken kind,
Felt only in the softness of your touch,
The intensity of your gaze:
For to speak it out loud would be more painful
Than to let it lie silent and uncertain on our lips.
You will leave me with a tiny void in my heart,
A scar that heals in time--
But still aches every so often
On a rainy day, or a lonely night,
Sore from the memories we never made--
The songs we never danced to,
The neckties I never straightened,
Or perhaps simply the hundreds of kisses
I will feel owed.
Years from now our story will be bittersweet--
Hard and heavy, yet terribly romantic.
But first, there will be the unbearable pain
Of losing you.