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inked solace Dec 2020
I’m surrounded by more people than ever,
So why am I so alone?
For all of these relationships are ripping apart,
Every precious friendship I’ve sewn.
when you know you're not doing what's best for yourself, but you can't stop making it worse
inked solace Jan 2021
I could have all the money in the world
All the drama and the fame
But I’d still feel empty
Because without you, life isn’t the same

We could be dancing on tabletops
Make front page in the news
Or we could take off our phones
And turn off our shoes

Through thick and through thin
I’m stuck to you like glue
I’ll do anything, almost anything
As long as I’m with you
The charm of being in a relationship with someone just as lost as you are <3

Inspired by "Nothing" by Bruno Major, check it out for a soft twist on lo-fi
inked solace Jan 2021
Her eyes held all the stars of the sky
And her smile held the warmth of the sun
The wrinkles in her eyes held wisdom
But her complexion showed all the battles she had won

For before a diamond is a crystal
It is refined and purified through heat
Before a maiden can be rescued from her tower
There is a dragon the knight must defeat

There is no victory without a battle
And there is no glory in an unfought war
Without struggle, there can be no resilience
You can't know peace until you’ve experienced the gore
inked solace Dec 2020
Romances come and go,
People love and then leave
Why can’t we live in a fairy tale
When all we have to do is ‘believe’?

Why won’t my fairy godmother visit?
Why can’t we wish upon a star?
Why can’t we live ‘happily ever after’?
Why can’t I have a prince from a kingdom afar?

Maybe this is a fantasy
Or maybe reality is harsh and cold
But without the struggles and the pain
The magic couldn’t stand out so bold.
see the magic in your life <3
inked solace Jan 2021
Imagine if we could forget our problems
As easily as we forget our blessings
inked solace Dec 2020
Have you ever heard a story
That didn’t end in ‘happily ever after’?
For the greatest story I’ve ever known
Wasn’t filled with happiness and laughter.

Stories like cinderella and sleeping beauty
And princess and the frog, I won’t bother
For, by far, the greatest story of them all
Is of a girl and her sick father
and that story is of my father and I
inked solace Dec 2020
when I asked if you were ok,
you hesitated

in your hesitation, I found my answer
~finally you waken unto the dream~
inked solace Mar 2021
My stretch marks define who I am
This insecurity rules my life
Nothing can **** this inner demon
Not therapy, nor meds, nor knife

It grows hungrier by the minute
Consuming my every thought
Eating away at my confidence
Making it harder to be what I’m not

My eyes stained red, these painful tears
That soak the sheets on my bed
Like rain that is supposed to nourish a flower
And ends up drowning it instead
Why fix it when the worrying won’t end
Why try if theres nothing else to save
This insecurity is my cruel, demanding master
And I am my insecurity’s obedient slave
inked solace Jan 2021
She looks in the mirror and cries
For she is not the beautiful woman she once used to be
She looks in the mirror and weeps
For the loss of the reflection she used to see

Our culture tells her that she’s bad
Because she has freckles and wrinkles and such
And she forgets to stop and think
That maybe looks don’t matter all that much

For appearance fades and standards change
But one thing stays constant and true
Its the inside that truly matters in life
That bright, bold, beautiful you
inked solace Jan 2021
The more you give me now
The more I’ll have to leave behind
The more you’re in my head
The less I have a peace of mind

You say you want to love me
But to love me you have to leave
You're so independent and strong
So why am I so weak and naive?
inked solace Dec 2020
I am happy
but it's only a mask

I am cheerful
but it feels more like a task

I cry with tears of joy
when really they're tears of pain

I claim im growing to be a better person
when I don't know if I'll ever be myself again
maybe you relate, maybe you don't
inked solace Dec 2020
all the time that we've spent,
all the things we didn't do

all the love that we showed,
all the hate that we showed too

all the shades of the sky we've seen,
every tint and every hue

all the laughter and all the joy,
all the struggles we suffered through

all these memories locked away
because now i'm losing you
sometimes the best memories are the most painful to reminisce on
inked solace Feb 2021
You’re the monster under my bed
A creature hunting for it’s prey
Victims come running as fools of love
When all you love for, is to play

You’re a wolf in sheep’s soft clothing
Prowling along the city’s streets
You lie to me as often as you breathe
As often as my heart tenderly beats

If only fools fall for you
Then I guess that means I’m a fool
I let my guard down and was forced to pay
The toll, so damaging and cruel

I’m not in love with you
But I’m in love with the stories you told
I spent all my diamonds on your deceptions
And I bought every last lie that you sold
you might know that monster...
maybe you are that monster
inked solace May 2021
the moon is so loving, and yet so mocking
so comforting, and so unexplainably cruel
she calls me the victim, and then the villain
claiming I'm the innocent, and then I'm the fool

with craters as deep as my earthly pains
and an atmosphere as weak as my trust,
her whispers infect the blood in my veins
reminding me of my heartbreak and lust

I came here to escape my earthly pains
but alas, moonly pains took their place
I left my planet to find simple peace
but one can never find any comfort in space

She smiled at me when I was on the earth
yet, when I sought refuge, she changed her mind
don't turn to the moon when you're in pain
for more suffering is all you'll find
the stars, however, may be kinder to you
for they are a guide to the very lost
surely the stars aren't as cruel
and won't comfort with so great of a cost
inked solace Dec 2020
I can always forgive
But I will never forget.
It is largely viewed as a curse
Fueling malice and hate, but yet,

Maybe it’s not a bad thing
To remember you were wronged,
For then you know how to treat other people
And restore things to where they belonged
learn from other peoples' mistakes
inked solace Jan 2021
I swear I’m not “crazy”
My pain is real
Not in my head

I swear I’m not
Suffering from “anxiety”
As I’m laying in this hospital bed
inked solace Dec 2020
Will you live today as an optimist
Or will you let life be boring and dull?
Will you seek to conquer and drive each day,
And live life with a glass half full?

Will you live life with false hope and expectations,
Or will you acknowledge reality, and gain some control?
For living with a more negative look on life
Can help you focus on achieving your ultimate goal.

Is there a balance between these two,
Between the positive and the not?
Maybe there’s some warm in-between
Of the icy cold and the scalding hot.
inked solace Feb 2021
Roses aren't perfect
And their leaves are green
Babygirl, you are flawless
An angel and a queen

Those freckles painted across your face
Are like the stars in the night sky
And those glass-stained irises
Radiate your beautiful nature from your eye

The world tells you you’re broken
And the world may be right
But those scars are your trophies
And your blemishes prove your fight
your stretch marks don't define you
and your mistakes can't limit who you are
why believe you are dull and unworthy
when you can know you're a bold, shining star

keep shining <3
inked solace Dec 2020
i have no self control.

i cry when there's no reason
i yell when there's no cause
i eat without any discipline
i would gladly dive into Death's jaws

maybe it's because i'm losing myself,
or maybe it's because i'm losing him
for since i learned he was dying
it's been easier to sink rather than swim
maybe you haven't lost a loved one,
but even the leaving of a friend
can leave a person this broken
with no more love left to spend
inked solace Jan 2021
Is it worth it to give in to your problems?
To all the struggles of your life?
Because there are people out there who need you
As a sibling, a friend, a husband, or a wife

Sometimes we’re caught in a storm
Waves crashing all around
And we forget that we can swim
We don’t have to drown
inked solace Jan 2021
Drowning in my own tears
But I’m their only cause.
Depreciating according to Culture’s standards
Of a girl with no blemishes or flaws

My emotions have been put behind bars
My soul is dying behind this face
For while on the inside im in pain
All you can see is a woman of beauty and grace

People think that they know me
But they only know the ’me’ that I show
For the real me is not approved of by our society
Living my life on a self-inflicted death row
inked solace Jan 2021
diamonds behind your eyelids
your stained glass iris
those shining, crystal tears
slowly killing me like a virus

your cold trembling hands
like ice, perfectly carved
your endless need for love
finds itself continuously starved
inked solace Jan 2021
The roses in our garden
Are watered with tears, and not rain
The roses in our garden
Are blossomed by my sorrows and my pain

I don’t know how they got here
And I don’t know if they’ll ever leave
All I know is that they thrive best
When I lay by their roots to grieve

Their beauty mocks my suffering
And their petals reflect my sorrow
It seems they take away my joy
They hope to steal, not borrow

They feed off my flowing river
A river, not short of supply
For as long as we stay together
This river will never run dry

Our garden is our relationship
This superficial, dying flame
Maintaining this garden kills me
I can no longer keep it tame

Don’t ever trust a pretty garden
For it takes sacrifice to make it that way
It drains life to keep it red and pink
And it’s a price I’m not willing to pay
inked solace Jan 2021
Wherever you came from
Wherever you're going
I promise I'm not far behind

Whether you are sunshine
Whether you are rain
I'm ready for your weather

i wish someone would have this devotion
inked solace Jan 2021
Falling through that rabbit hole
Seeing all reason and logic fade
At first I found it delightfully amusing
But after a while I became afraid

I landed in a place full of strange creatures
That can do fearfully wonderful things
The fish sit around and play poker
While frogs bounce around on springs

From clouds hung large and small clocks
that didn’t seem to even keep time
And there lived many wealthy mad hatters
Who couldn’t seem to even own a dime

I got bored of the logic and reason of home
And traded it for chaos that never turns bland
I’m terrified of and in love with this beautiful place
This irrational, unexplainable Wonderland
inked solace Dec 2020
What do words mean anymore
When they’re used for such shallow things
For there are no words that can heal the wounds
That losing a father brings

“I love you” is a meaningless, worthless phrase
And “have faith” means about the same
Some people don’t understand
That these words simply add fuel to the flame.
sometimes a comfort can add onto the pain
inked solace Dec 2020
Some wounds have this peculiarity:
They may be hidden, but they never fully close.
Always painful, always ready to bleed when touched,
Delicate as a withering rose.

They remain fresh and open in the heart,
with every pulse and breath, pulling apart.

As you lay in your hospital bed,
hurting more than you can bare,
I'm sorry for all the times I gave up on you,
For all the times I wasn't there.
inspired by Alexander Dumas's "Count of Monte Cristo"

— The End —