I should have just
Kissed you in front
of everyone
and all at once
I shouldn't have
Jumped over
the lump in my throat
To get passed
All the notes that you wrote
Ink that stained my paper skin
Stand naked & read
over and over again
There is no more begins with
Like a light switch
Your hands turned me on
and every room would shine
I sleep in pitch black now
cause you aren't mine
& I might seem fine
but at night I'm reminded
and light only brightens
the empty space on my chest
where you'll always belong

You let me
Paint your nails at a bar
And
I fell in love with you
In line for ice cream
Searching faces on a wall
That was our flume
you were my star
I thought our plot
would end up on Mars
We road hard
I road you hard
I cannot seem
To forget your arms
Now I'm scarred
Feathered and worded
I traced your courage
To stick around
When I wasn't flourishing
Until you had enough
How abrupt that was
I ****** us
You're fed up
With my flooding
I filled your cup with disgust
I should have drank it back up
But instead I poured worry
and our book got shut
& I wonder if you underlined
any of the words to that story

Should I shield myself
I'll feel nothing
If I open my chest up
My heart will start its running
My blood starts over flooding
Then suddenly
we're nothing
If this is what nothing feels like
Then I'd like to just feel something
Else
Something healthy
Like a hand
Something heavy

Something touching something else
You touched me far before you met me

Counting stars & feeling small
Small like it felt
right when you left me
But left just isn't right girl
Hard as rocks before you wrecked me
Sharp as shards and twice as deadly
Now I sit here like a log
& even the frogs have all misread me
My own heart is out to get me
But I will not say a word
This time
I'll stay focused on mine
While you try & look for yours

I'm taking a ride tonight
My eyes are wide open
And I look at myself
through the eyes of a woman
I stare for a while
A little disheartened
For a moment you flew
And now your wings are all rotten
Your bones are all cold
& You could have been smarter
You always did what you're told
Such a good little daughter

With no hope to hold onto
You pushed that away
Cause it got hard for you to talk through your **** everyday
So forget it
Forget it
and they'll forget you  
I'm alone every night
Just a fool in a room

Desperate for something
Moon, what do I do?
i need guidance, a sign
Or am I already ruined?

I kneel
in disbelief
That something like this
Could happen to me
And I grieve
Cause the **** exists
I have something to tell you
Wipe the spit off my lisp
My grip slowly slipping
I can't sit still
In this pit
While I'm
creating earthquakes
Kicking a split in my ship
Slowly sink while I sit
I forget I can swim

I sink low
I combust
I hit a rock
They call "bottom"
And all of my hope in that world
Has now been forgotten

you people disgust me
i use to feel lucky
but now all i yield
is the feel of
unlucky
trust nothing
your words feel like shields
i feel yucky
as soon as i see or
spin wheels
words like
gray
names like buckley
have I spilled all our disgusting taste
you're a ******
face your ear hole my dear
I hear nothing
fear nothing
surprised by the fault
in our skies
brown eyes you mean
something
but everyone gets stuff
like something
i want more than your stuff
& your pour
fills
my
nothing

today
i crawled over in my grave
safely
and that's
okay
with my way
because lately
your name tastes vague
and untasty
like a grave or rotten pastries
it's okay
i'm still gay
i still taste the
same
but i crave
a new name
like
like
lately
I'm hasty
a bit hazy
still insanely
calling your name
like my frame had a replay button
did you say somethin?
you refrain woman
you think your game is playing
you obtain nothin
but i gain something
a new brain function
a new name for it
I'd be down on the floor
but i'll sustain from it
and you'll regain a substance
one made out of gunk
a replayed nothing
I just learned from it
i learned some girls are worth
more than my brain numbeth
but that brain cometh with a new plan
like like
tonight i'll burn you down
and every memory of loving you
i'll breathe flames from it
and burn my way from it
i prayed all day
because the brave plummet and we're worth more than
relationship frumps we're higher than
down
in the dumps
i trust nothing i'm stumped
i'm still frowning
i'm dumped
you know not of this chump
goodnight now that i'm done
you'll now run from it
please run from it
i'd spell it all out
but her letters thumb crumb summits
it's a plum turned into a prune
sweet but unripe
gum
unchewed but alright
come at night and sleep
sleep like you
sleep like
sleep
with me like we
sleep
like only we sleep