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Oct 2010 · 573
I'm Falling, I'm Falling...
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
Walking, walking,
let's move on forward.
But every time I try,
it's two steps backward.

Listen, listen,
to the words I need to say.
But they aren't coming out,
no honey, not today.

I wish, I wish,
I could tell you everything.
But I don't know myself,
I can't hear my heart sing.

The words, the words,
so lost in my heart.
I can't decifer them,
and it's tearing me apart.

I miss, I miss,
what we used to be.
The best friends ever,
you were always there for me.

I want, I want,
that someone to always hold.
Who's here to be with me,
and forever grow old.

I need, I need,
someone to just say.
"Baby, it'll be all right,"
and hold me close today.

These days, these days,
getting harder to bear.
The people around,
my heart they tear.

I'm falling, I'm falling,
someone help me up.
These days, I'm telling you,
have never been so rough.

My feelings, my feelings,
have never been so hard.
To decifer, but honey,
there's more and more ...

I'm falling....I'm falling...
I need help now ...
Can someone just hold me?
It's gotta be alright some how ...
Oct 2010 · 768
And Then...
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
They're not quite there,
not there yet.
They're on their way there,
that point where they can't turn back.
The moment he looked into her eyes,
with that crooked little smile.
That moment their hearts sparked,
he made her heart race.
His touch on hers was like fire,
and he made her word light up.
The sparkle in his eyes,
baby, she hasn't seen that in a while.
The butterflies and knots,
they raced around her stomach and chest.
Her head was spinning with disbelief,
She laid back with her head on his pillows.

And then he kissed her.
And then thier lips met.
And then the fire sparked.
And she just can't go back.
And then he kissed her.
Ans then she got scared.
And now she's afraid,
And now she's scared.
She's scared of losing him.
She's scared of losing Them.

And then he told her it's okay,
and now she waits for another moment like that....
Inspiration taken from Glitter in the Air by Pink :)
Oct 2010 · 678
The Rose
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
The rose is dying,
winding around and wilted.
The rose is falling, falling,
from it's perch so high on the terrace.
The rose is getting colder,
freezing and wilting and dying.
The rose is left alone,
for no one else to find.
The rose is changing colors now,
it's darker, darker.
It's shriveling up, this rose it is,
it's getting smaller, smaller.

*The Rose Is Dying...
Can We Save It?
Oct 2010 · 426
Your Dying Rose
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
Time goes on,
and things change.
Feelings grow,
and feelings fade.

The rose in bloom,
is dying now.
He's praying they'll make it,
some way, some how.

Time goes on,
she's fading away.
He's longing for words,
he wishes she would say.

His eyes are faded,
the shine disappeared.
I can see the sadness,
the everlasting fears.

Everything happens,
for a reason I swear.
Our heartstrings are pulled,
and sometimes tear.

Just look for the one,
with a needle and thread.
Who can mend your heart,
be there till the end.

The one who loves you,
with open arms.
Who cares for you,
inflicts no harm.

I promise you I'll try,
to light up your life.
To cherish you endlessly,
to get rid of the strife.

I promise you,
that I will try.
To cure your rose,
so it does not die.

No matter what happens,
I'll stand up with you forever.
I promise you, hunny,
we'll make it through together.
Written for my very best friend. Hang in there, hunny <3
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
When she talks about it,
it makes it real.
Her vulnerability,
is their's to steal.

It's what she fears,
forever and always.
So she speaks not a word,
she shies away.

In large group,
she feels their eyes.
Fixating on her,
calling on her lies.

They know that she,
is holding something back.
But she hasn't told them,
yet what it is she lacks.

She's scared, she's afraid,
what will they think.
As they stare at her,
she feels herself shrink.

The memories so tough,
she wanted to forget.
This isn't what she signed on for,
this isn't what she meant.

But once she starts,
she just can't stop.
She hands start to shake,
her cheeks get hott.

When she finishes her story,
she looks up with tears.
They put their arms around her,
comforting her fears.

They accept her for her,
past present and all.
Holding her up high,
comforting her when she falls.

These people are members,
of the House of Shalom.
With open hearts and arms,
this place is home.
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
Staring up towards the sky,
never wanting to say goodbye.
Theminutes count down to our time apart,
but no matter what, you'll be in my heart.

your baby blue eyes, they match the sky,
your arms around me make me fly.
My eyes close off and sleep comes near,
with you all around me I have nothing to fear.

I lay on your legs as I slowly drift off,
my hand falls and alerts me like a shot.
I open my eyes and see your smile,
knowing the next time we'll be here wont' be for a while.

The water is peacefull here with you,
my heart is at ease with all that we do.
No matter how hear or far away,
I promise you'll be in my heart always.
Oct 2010 · 664
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
Your touch,
sends chills,
racing through,
my entire body.

Your smile,
sends jolts,
of electricity,
through my heart.

The words you say,
make my heart skip,
the way you talk,
makes my head summersault.

The worse part,
of this whole thing,
is I can't tell you,
and you don't even know...
Oct 2010 · 529
No More Fears <3
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
The simple touch,
you arms on me.
A place like this,
I want to forever be.

We talked, we listened,
to each other's life story.
This new friendship,
unlike any before thee.

Your smile and dimples,
spread across your face.
You laughter and jokes,
make me never want to leave this place.

You walked me home,
straight to the door.
You held me close,
unlike before.

You leaned in close,
kissed my lips.
Your touch passionate,
hands on my hips.

"I just wanted to know,
what it would be like."
You told me as,
we ended the night.

I stood astonished,
as you left the scene.
Me emotions ran wild,
inside of me.

My eyes opened up,
I rolled over in bed.
Those last 4 stanzas,
were just in my head.

But all before that,
that lies in my heart.
When we're close together,
or farther apart.

And there's no other feeling,
like when you hold me tight.
My dear, that touch,
can get me through the night.

Your smile, your eyes,
our laughter and tears.
With you by my side,
I have no more fears...
Oct 2010 · 396
Someone Who Cares
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
Music, books,
electronic things.
You make me smile,
and my happiness sing.

Your hugs so warm,
your eyes so bright.
On my bad days,
you tell me "Hunny, it's alright"

It feels like I've known you,
for what seems like forever.
You took a young girl,
and you continue to help her.

It scares me to think,
how close we have gotten.
In such a short time,
my unhappiness forgotten.

I don't know how you do,
what is it is you do to me.
But honey, please,
promise you won't leave.

It's been quite a while,
since I've had a friendship like this.
You're everything I dreamed of,
everything I missed.

I watch your eyes shine,
I hear your voice sing.
I see the clothes you wear,
and I admire your ring.

Everything about you,
intricate and amazing.
What I am when I'm with you,
there's never been such a thing.

I guess all I'm trying to say,
is I'm glad to have you there.
To hug me all the time,
I've found someone who cares. <3
Oct 2010 · 1.8k
You Made Me Stronger
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
After all the tears,
the painful heartaches.
The reluctancies,
and the stress we've made.

After all we've been through,
mostly all the bad.
I'm thankfull for all of this,
all the fun we had.

And when I look back,
and I remember even the fights.
The times we said goodbye,
the tears I cried at night.

I'm thankfull for it all,
because it helped me so much.
To be stronger on my own,
to kick away that crutch.

To stand alone myself,
and be proud of who I am.
Alone with someone,
to always help me stand.

My biggest fear has been,
to always stand alone.
But I'm not so afraid now,
to be on my very own.

After all we've been through,
and will go through later I'm sure.
You have been my heartache,
but have also been my cure.

You've helped me be stronger,
and it took me till now to know.
That I'm thankfull for us,
even if I don't show.

So here's my chance to say,
I'm thankfull for you in my life.
When we're all smiling,
and even through the strife.

Thank you for who you are,
and everything you do.
Most importantly though,
thanks for being you.
This week we were talking about what we were thankful for at The House Of Shalom. I was thinking in my mind, I'm thankful for him. Even if we fight, even if we're mad at eachother, he helped bring out the best in me. He helped bring out the fighter and the believer and the one who can stand on her own. I'm thankful to have had him in my life, even if he was just one of those people who walked in to teach me a lesson and just had to walk out again. He was there for a reason, and I've come to realize that reason. I just wanted to express that to everyone. <3 Happy Thanksgiving (however you spell it)
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
They tell her to forget,
he's a piece of the past.
But how can she forget,
something she wanted to last?

They tell her it's over,
and to just let go.
She's trying her hardest,
but comes with nothing to show.

Just because it's her past,
doesn't mean she won't remember.
The one who made her smile,
the one who said forever.

Just because she's moved on,
doesn't mean she doesn't cry.
Spends time writing,
and to all of them she's lieing.

Forgive and forget isn't easy,
and it rarely ever works out.
When that friendship that once made you smile,
has been reduced to nothing but shouting.

Forgive and forget seems,
like an easy thing to do.
But not when she's lieing,
and truely misses you.
Oct 2010 · 713
In Memory Of Lucy <3
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
The pitter patter on the floor,
the warm welcome as you walk in.
This is your comfort,
this is man's best friend.

They bark at the door,
when any stranger comes near.
Letting you know,
"Master, someone's here!"

They listen to you cry,
when it seems no one else will.
They make you laugh,
and always give you a thrill.

A dog, a pet, but more than that,
it's a family memeber.
And when they're taken away,
they remain in your heart forever.
This was written in memory of a beloved dog named Lucy. We all grew up with her, and she was more than just our best friend's pet. She was a member of their family. Lucy Lou, you will be missed <3 RIP
Oct 2010 · 566
Jolene Perron Oct 2010
Stiches stiched,
across her lips.
Pen sits,
on her finger tips.

Her writing is true,
she gets is point blank.
From the moment it happened,
and when her heart sank.

She scribbles the truth,
but does anyone see.
The hurt and betrayal,
the sadness in she.

She's forced to be quiet,
to stand alone.
In the rain and winds,
she is on her own.

It all happened,
what does it mean?
She's spent 3 years,
searching for meaning.

She's tried to tell,
the truth but then.
He's with someone new,
and she's silent again.

She watches in silence,
wanting to say.
To tell her the truth,
what happened that day.

The tape is over,
her mouth this time.
Waiting in silece,
her words confined.

The pen never stops,
she hits the keys hard.
The memory painful,
but she's moving forward.
Sep 2010 · 1.4k
Trusting That Feeling Again
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
That simple smile,
the way your eyes shine.
Has me going crazy,
however are you mine?

The distance between us,
gets harder with the days.
But, honey, let me tell you,
it scares me to feel this way.

Every time this happens,
I get crushed again.
My fault, his fault,
doesn't matter who's sin.

But it always seems to happen,
that things roll down hill.
And I'm left weeping,
sitting on a window sill.

Once you've been cut,
it gets harder to get  into it again.
To let someone like you,
become more than a friend.

But this all comes with trust,
and the love I find in you.
Something so pure,
something so true.

This happiness I feel,
whenever you're around.
When you send me a message,
to flip my frown upsidedown.

That feeling I get,
when you finally come around.
You pick me up and kiss my lips,
I'm a hundred feet off the ground.

I'm walking on air with you,
and falling deeper each day.
But, honey, it scares me,
to feel this way.

I'm walking with caution,
but trusting more as the days go by.
That you'll wash away my tears,
and never make me cry.
Sep 2010 · 466
Do You Remember Why?
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
Words leave our mouths,
the screaming never stopped.
We used the techniques,
for so long we've been taught.

Words amount to nothing,
true feelings never change.
It's been oh so long, honey,
that we have been this way.

The thought that crosses me,
runs through my mind today.
Can you even remember,
how we got this way?

I looked at you,
sitting behind me.
With our group of friends,
trying to see.

Trying to decifer,
the point to it all.
Why it can't be solved,
with a simple walk?

Can you even really see,
why we started this fight?
Where the anger came from?
along with hate and strife.

Why we started fighting,
what the purpose was behind it?
Did we ever really think,
something good would come of it?

Please try to remind me,
because I can't seem to see.
Why I'm mad at you,
and you're so angry with me.

This fight, so pointless,
I don't remember why.
This fight even began,
why we both began to lie.

Please just tell me,
because I've lost my sight.
Why ever did we start,
this prolonged, pointless fight?
Sep 2010 · 954
Save Me, Save Me.
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
The blood the blade,
the urge coming through.
Save me, save me,
with long talks with you.

The fountain, the picture,
sinical and wrong.
Save me, save me,
show me somewhere I belong.

The picture, the twist,
and anger is released.
*Save me, save me,
won't you stop me please.

Too late, it's over,
done with it now.
Save me, save me,
some way some how.

The blood is running,
down my finger tips.
Save me, save me,
seal up all these rips.

All for the loss,
of my one friend friend.
Save me, save me,
make this sorrow end.
Sep 2010 · 366
Help Me Get There
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
The smiles and happiness,
                             The laughter and jokes,
                                                The reasonable discussions,
                     "help me get there."

Confident and happy,
                             Smiles and rights,
                                                Okay and sunshine,
                       "help me be her."

Truth within a lie,
                            Bottom of the mess,
                                                 Civil within anger,
                       "help me find it."

Try to understand,
                             Try to see my view,
                                                  Try talk with me,
                   "help me sort it out."

Be there for me,
                              Let me cry with you,
                                                    Let me vent to you,
                        "help me heal."

Where it all makes sense,
                           Where the fence ends,
                                                 Where we can just along,
                      *"Help Me Get There."
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
I walked away today,
so I would say the words.
That came to my mind,
because I knew that they would hurt.

I was told to stop,
to just let him go.
I'm with someone new now,
but just so you know.

I can be with someone,
who loves me very much.
But it doesn't make it stop,
can't you hear my heart crunch?

The man I'm with is wonderful,
in every single way.
He understands my feelings,
even if I say.

I still miss him,
and everything we were.
I still love him,
even if he's with her.

Even if I'm with that someone new,
that doesn't make it go away.
I left the game,
because there was so much to say.

If you actually want to hear,
trust me I won't hold back.
But I'm being accused of lieing,
and there's confidence I lack.

Can you please just try,
to sit down and listen to this.
To let me tell you all the reasons,
it's him I really miss.

He's with her, I get it,
but that doens't make it go away.
Can't tell you how many times,
I've wanted things to change.

But I still miss him,
and I can't tell my heart what to do.
Especially since there is,
that one underlying issue.

The one that will tie,
me to him forever.
When I'm with someone else,
and he is with her.

It makes my heart tremble,
every part of me ache.
I know I did things bad,
I know I've made mistakes.

But today I walked off,
I just walked away.
So I wouldn't regret saying,
everything I wanted to say...
Sep 2010 · 640
Shouting The Truth
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
I wonder what to do,
I sit here silently wait.
My head is filled with anger,
my heart is filled with hate.

I'm ridiculed constantly,
told it's not the truth.
How ever would you know?
I am me, you are you.

What reason do I have,
to feed you many lies.
This is all the truth,
a reality that is mine.

I'm tired of trying,
to tell the truth and then.
Being told it's wrong,
called a liar again.

Or telling someone something,
and being promised they won't.
Tell anyone else,
but somehow it gets out?

Let's play truth or dare,
or many just dare now.
Because no one tells the truth,
and we're all alone somehow.

No one can be trusted,
secrets always get out.
I sit here in silence,
but once I tried to shout...
Sep 2010 · 1.2k
The Triangle
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
Through the relationships,
that we've all been through.
Somethings very different,
this time here with you.

Every Relationship is like,
a triangle in support.
Both sides lean in equally,
it's strong in many sorts.

The triangle can be the greatest,
strongest shape of all.
Until one side leans much more,
then it begins to fall.

When both sides lean,
on eachother both the same.
It becomes more than scalene,
and both sides get some gain.

The triangle is equal,
the relationship is right.
It can make it through struggles,
every day and night.

There's something different now,
for we both lean on eachother.
But we lead our own lies,
apart from one another.

Our relationship is stable,
an equalateral triangle if you will.
It took a lot of time,
it took a lot of skill.

We learn from experience,
how to make it stable.
In time it gets easier,
and we are more able.

To lean on the other right,
to take turns in the sorrow.
It can't be fixed immedeately,
maybe not tomorrow.

But all good things take time,
and time comforts all.
It meakes things stronger,
and catches when we fall.
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
There is a point,
when we must let go.
I've tried my best,
to let you know.

I've done what I could,
I was honest when asked.
I hope your future,
is unlike my past.

I hope you help,
him heal to the full.
I hope when he pushes,
that you'll always pull.

That you won't give up,
like we did before.
You won't end up like me,
regretably torn.

I know you understand,
you're honest with me.
You know there's a lot,
I have yet to tell he.

It will come in time,
with friendship I hope.
But telling him now,
will not help me cope.

You understand when,
I told you all I thought.
Everything you asked,
as my cheeks turned hot.

My hands would shake,
the lump in my throat.
It would be harder with him,
I want to let him know ...

But sometimes things,
they just need time.
So I sit here in silence,
with thoughts that are  mine..
Sep 2010 · 703
This Fence, That Secret.
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
The face in the mirror,
getting old and faded.
The feelings in my heart,
becoming jaded.

It took all I had,
a place in my heart.
I wish I could tell you,
but it would tear us more apart.

It would ruin everything,
destroy you deep within.
Like it destroys me,
time and time again.

I sit here in silence,
with my mouth scratched out.
Looking up to the sky,
as I try to shout.

But nothing will help,
because it doesn't make sense.
So I leave it be,
while I build this fence ...
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
I'm imaingining your fingers,
as they tightly grasp.
For the first time,
I wished it would last.

I was dreaming of first steps,
the words you would first say.
Your smile and eyes,
that would help me through the day.

I thought of your cry,
what it may sound like.
But your smile and laugh,
would make it alright.

I didn't even care,
boy or girl, didn't matter to me.
As long as you were here,
and you came along healthy.

But the blood came fast,
when it really shouldn't have.
I rushed to the doctor,
with that test on my lap.

"Doctor, look, it's positive,
was it just a mistake?
Is there something I can do?
or is it just too late?

"Tell me, my baby,
that it's alright.
That'll I hear that cry,
that it'll make it through the night"

"I'm sorry ma'am to tell you,
this baby is no more.
You miscarried your child,
and  there's nothing you can do for.

"This child to make it through,
I'm sorry, it's far too late.
This wasn't meant to be,
this was truely fate."

Now I sit here on my bed,
with the test in hand.
I was going to tell you,
I knew, I said, I can.

But there's not point now,
I sit here silently broken.
At what could have been,
my baby took my lost token.
Sep 2010 · 461
February 18 2008
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
Sunshine, rain,
winter snowfall.
Hail, ice,
she's been through it all.

Grades, marks,
a fifty in math.
Pencils, pens,
school makes her laugh.

But one thing,
it makes her shake.
Her head spins,
her heart aches.

When she thinks back,
to that moment in time.
She's written poems,
she's made them rhyme.

But when it comes,
all finally together.
It's worse than school,
or stormy weather.

When the callendar rolls,
February 18.
She clenches her fists,
she grindes her teeth.

The memories invade,
her dreams and her head.
The silences screams,
will it ever end?

The nightmares and violence,
she can't make it stop.
Her heart pounds,
her blood boils hot.

"Just don't touch me,"
is what she'll say.
The touch of anyone,
will set her off today.

The memories won't leave,
but the pain gets less.
She's pushing through it all,
cleaning up that mess...
Sep 2010 · 443
This Is Poetry
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
Words and stanzas,
grammar and lines.
This is poetry,
the work of the mind.

Fingers flying,
darting across keys.
A way of the mind,
a lot about me.

Expressions of words,
experience, thoughts and feelings.
Reading between the lines,
finding secret meanings.

This is what I do,
why I was put on the earth.
To express the truth,
even if it hurts.

I'll never stop writing,
showing it to the world.
Letting them look,
into the life of a girl.

A little dark and scary,
but it's me non-the-less.
I may be smiling on the outside,
but deep down I'm a mess.

I'm expressing myself,
even to a stranger unknown.
Having someone comment and relate,
knowing I'm not alone.

If you don't like it,
well honey don't read.
This is the truth,
and this is me.
Sep 2010 · 467
His Game
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
I've kept my mouth shut,
haven't said what's on my mind.
The words that want to come,
well, sweetie, they aren't kind.

I've analyzed it all,
sat down with friends.
I know it better than anyone,
I see how this will end.

I've been there through it all,
every last goodbye.
You watched him destroy me,
you watched him make me cry.

But you didn't see when,
he called me on the phone.
Asked if I was upset,
because I was the one alone.

Threw it in my face,
that he'd kissed another girl.
When honestly I didn't care,
but he made my head whurl.

You weren't there to hear,
him call ******* on me.
He told me I was nothing but a *****,
and that was all I'd ever be.

You weren't there to see,
me throw water in his face.
I haven't said but two words,
because this is not my place.

I wish somehow you'd ask,
come talk like we used to.
You watched me cry a lot,
I always confided in you.

But I feel like there's a wall,
it's hard and brick and standing.
Keeping me away from you,
left me alone comprehending.

All that's going on,
everything and more.
The times he called me fat,
that I was nothing but a *****...

And what he called ******* on,
honey you would fly.
I was still at work,
and I just wanted to cry.

I wish I could tell you this,
everything and more.
But now I don't know what to say,
and I just can't be sure.

Honey can't you see?
all he's done here.
Made me and others cry,
hard sobbing tears.

He was in love with someone,
he felt head over heels.
Claimed he'd never felt that way,
and it just didn't seem real.

Then he went for you,
immedeately to follow.
Where did those feelings go?
because they surely were not hollow.

This is all a game to him,
and it will be nothing more.
He was "In Love" now he's with you,
and I'm the ******* *****?
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
I could feel your presence,
behind my back.
Can you feel the esteem,
I surely lack?

My walls are breaking,
crumbling down.
You look at me,
with a mile deep frown.

This is what I feared,
I knew this would happen.
I reach for your hand,
my heart slowly blackens.

I can feel the bricks,
as they all come loose.
Unintentionaly you tie the rope,
tight in a noose.

It's pulling tighter, tighter,
as the song goes on.
The tears come down,
the emotions won.

I can feel it fall,
slowly down my cheek.
I'm silently crying,
you can't hear me weep.

I wonder if you feel it,
the subtle little pull.
That ache in my heart,
I want to let you know ...

My best friend beside me,
on the other side.
Squeezes my hand tightly,
she knows that I am crying.

But still I try silence,
and the song slowly goes on.
The emotions getting harder to fight,
this time they have won.

I've tried not to show,
you or her my hurt.
But the tears slowly fall,
they're landing on my shirt.

When it's time to get up,
in a circle we sway together.
I see you two toegether,
your arm draped around her.

It doesn't matter who I'm with,
doesn't matter what I say.
You'll always have a piece,
of my heart that aches always.

She comes to say she's sorry,
but what more can she do?
It's always gonna hurt,
because I truely loved you.

Those feelings fade,
but don't really go away.
They just get easier to bare,
but remain there always.

As I fall in love,
deep with someone knew.
There's always part of my heart,
that will be set on you.

Seeing you with her,
one of my best friends.
It pulls that noose tighter,
getting hard to breathe again.

I escape as fast as possible,
getting as far as I can away.
Never thought I'd want to leave,
but what more can I say?

I dart down the street,
sobs coming out loud.
My heart coming out of my chest,
oh so hard it pounds.

When I finally reach my steps,
I fall flat on my face.
I curl up on the bottom,
"Let me leave this place..."
Sep 2010 · 2.7k
New Year (Without You)
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
New job, new boy, new year,
this is what it's about.
New life, new start, new begining,
I'm begining to mend my heart.

I'm leaving it all behind,
that life is in the dust.
I'm trying to mend my heart,
for that, this is a must.

The friends, the love, the life,
it's all becoming new.
The happiness, smiles, the grace,
I'm finding in someone who.

Gives a **** about me,
my hurt and struggles and fears.
Let's me know I'm beautiful,
and tries to dry my tears.

I'm mending all the wrong,
I'm making it all right.
I'm looking out for me now,
I'm officially ending this fight.

I don't care where it started,
but now I believe is the end.
Time to look at all the tattered,
broken and dirtied loose ends.

I'm starting a new job,
getting away from him.
Started a new school year,
doing well in my classes again.

**This is time for resolution,
this is the time for new.
I'm focusing on me this year,
this is a year without you.
Sep 2010 · 703
September 11 Last Year
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
It was almost a year,
September 11 2009.
At this time last year,
honey you were mine.

My mind's going back,
thinking thoughts of then.
The talks we had,
things we used to do when.

We were together,
but this time this year.
You're with her,
and I'm alone here.

Insignificantly enough,
we both have significant others.
We've both fallen again,
we both have separate lovers.

But I miss my bestie,
my one true friend.
The one who said,
he'd be there till the end.

I miss just talking,
with you about it all.
I miss having you catch me,
every time I'd fall.

This time last year,
it was all that could have been.
September 11 2009,
but now it's 2010.

So much has changed,
us, me and you.
Nothing more is said,
nothing more to do.

Just to reminise,
to remember it all.
Silently crying,
here I am, I fall ...
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
No matter what I say,
no matter what I do.
There will always be a piece of me,
hidden deep in you.

No matter who I'm with,
no matter what I say.
Seeing you with her,
kills me in every way.

If it makes you happy,
darling I understand.
But honey I still wish,
that you were my man.

That part of my heart,
that single piece you hold.
It's wearing very thin,
and it's getting very cold.

I want to see you happy,
and if this is what I takes.
I'll walk away from you,
until the earth shakes.

I'll keep walking when,
the skies come crashing down.
Keep smiling outside,
when inside I'm wearing a frown.

We both have significant others,
and only time will tell.
But I never forget,
just how hard I fell.

You can all call it a lie,
call it jealousy.
But as much as my heart's breaking,
as long as he's happy.

I'll go on living life,
even with my doubts.
There will be moments when,
I just want to sit and pout.

But life moves on without us,
so I won't stand still for long.
It won't be too long till,
everything is long gone.
Sep 2010 · 428
Done Fucking Feeling
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
Hands shaking,
face burning,
vision bluring,
this is what I feel.

Pulse beating,
uncontrolable feelings,
frown setting,
this is what I feel.

Questions racing,
thoughts overwhelming,
confusing setting,
this is what I feel.

Fifty feet,
red face,
tears pouring,
this is what I'm doing.

Curled up,
with a blanket,
ripping pictures,
this is what I'm doing.

I hope you know,
I hope you see,
I hope you understand,
this is how I feel.

Sep 2010 · 577
Hey There, Little Girl
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
Hey there little girl,
with the ear streaked face.
Hey there little girl,
walking at a slow pace.

You know there little girl,
things get better.
You know there little girl,
there's sunshine in this weather.

The tears will come,
they'll fall to the ground.
You'll climb those mountains,
some way some how.

The more you grow up,
the more you'll see.
You don't have to fit in,
you have your own person to be.

You're standing on the outside,
looking in on them.
Trying to fit in,
to be like them again.

But if that's the case,
then run away now.
Don't look back,
get away some how.

Find some people,
who accept you for you.
Or strengthen up your voice,
do whatever you can do.

But look here, little girl,
so matter what they say.
Look here, little girl,
be you in every way.
Sep 2010 · 516
Outside Looking In
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
Here we are,
new year again.
Sitting at a table,
surrounded by friends.

I'm standing in a group,
listening to them speak.
I feel like if I spoke,
my voice would be only meak.

You and me,
we grew apart.
Him over there,
he broke my heart.

I'm trying to work through,
to keep a smile up.
But it's only for so long,
before your heart's had enough.

I make small talk,
hangout with friends.
But it's not too long,
before my conversation ends.

I'm staring at a window,
from the outside in.
I'm speaking, I'm screaming,
but I can not win.

The window pane white,
the glass so thick.
The sorrow around me,
is making me sick.

I'm tapping on the window,
I'm screaming so loud.
At the top of my lungs,
I'm begining to pound.

The outside looking in,
I see what's going on.
The happiness, smiles,
and things that are wrong.

But enough is enough,
I wanna tear it away.
Let's break down this window,
even if it takes days.
Sep 2010 · 516
Back There
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
The waves hit the shoreline,
the breeze in my face.
There was not a single thing,
to make me leave this place.

Your eyes so gorgeous blue,
today they matched the sky.
Checking the clock every moment,
didn't wanna say goodbye.

The grass was soft below,
your touch smooth on me.
There was no other place,
that I would rather be.

Sitting there together,
I could talk with you for days.
You listen and understand,
I'm taggled in every way.

Taggled up in you,
your thoughts, your smell, your touch.
Never have I wanted something,
quite this much.

My day with you today,
well, nothing can compare.
I can't wait until,
the day that we're back there.
Sep 2010 · 412
Broken Things New
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
The rose has bloomed,
it seemed like so long.
It was wilted and crushed,
and it was all wrong.

The tree is blossoming,
the flowers are new.
This is another chance,
for a shot at me and you.

The concrete with cracks,
is getting it's fix.
We're taking away fighting,
putting friendship in the mix.

The bird with a wing,
broken and torn.
The girl with a smile,
that has been worn.

The bird begins to fly,
the girl begins to smile.
The tunnel at an end,
she's walked through for miles.

Things that are broken,
can always be made new.
This is a fresh begining,
this friendship here with you.

This time we'll take it,
nice steady and slow.
Three, Two, One,
here we go...
Sep 2010 · 487
The Story
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
His smile makes her smile,
it makes her feel.
His guitar makes her relax,
a feeling so unreal.

Her laugh makes him happy,
her smile makes him soar.
This emptiness is filling,
she's everything and more.

There is a love stroy,
behind every cry.
There is a sob story,
behind every lie.

His hands beat her down,
there's blood on her floor.
She scrambles to her feet,
behind her locking the door.

She left the child on the doorstep,
with a note that merely read :
"Make sure you raise her well,
I can not keep her fed.."

There's pieces to the story,
a truth to every lie.
There's always someone there,
within whom to confide.

She's holding the blade,
resting it on her wrist.
He stops her from writing,
another story with a twist.

He's drinking that bottle,
to his head he knows.
She's dumping it down the drain,
her love is begining to show.

Every single story,
every single lie.
Each and every person,
every last goodbye.

There is always a reason,
though you may not see.
He is there for her,
you are there for me.

Read what is not written,
see between the lines.
When she says she's okay,
she is not fine.

There is a story,
here at hand...
Sep 2010 · 798
Jolene Perron Sep 2010
                                                            ­          Kisses
   ­      Looks
                                                           ­                    Wants
  ­                     Love
                                                            ­                                     Needs
                                                           ­       Loss
                            ­                                                             Belief
                                                          ­  Fear

                                                          ­                                            *I Miss You ...
Aug 2010 · 468
This House Is Not A Home
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
This place, this house,
the feelings inside.
It holds an emptiness,
they can not hide.

The lonliness and feelings,
they feel out there.
The feelings at home,
that can not compare.

"It just feels right,
it feels like home."
He has the tears,
the hurt he's shown.

But nothing is here,
no job, no work.
It's too much pain,
for the happiness it's worth.

When they come to visit,
it's warm and right.
No cold, no sadness,
to leave is a fight.

Wherever they go,
and whatever they do.
This is home,
this is the truth.
Aug 2010 · 540
One - Hundred
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
Clothes, Smiles, Frowns,
One Girl

Change, Grow Up, Maturity,
One Year

Friends, Work, School,
One Life

Home, House, Venting,
One Understanding

Mom, Uncle, Aunt,
One Family

Promises, Love, Laughs,
One Boyfriend

Lies, Goodbyes, Hurt,
*One Hundred Tears
Aug 2010 · 591
How Dare You
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
You hurt me,
you lied and lied.
Now you could be the reason,
he says goodbye.

You didn't stop,
long after I told you to.
You blame me for hurting,
for doing all of this to you.

Well darling, you don't get,
how much hell you put me through.
You did twice as much to me,
than I ever did to you.

You keep messing with,
my life my love and more.
You wonder why I said goodbye,
why I was so sure?

You never stopped,
when I told you to.
When I said goodbye,
you should have too.

I couldn't stand to see you,
to look at your face.
I found someone better,
to take your place.

How dare you ridicule,
spread **** about me.
Act like the victim,
when in truth it was me.

How dare you act,
like you did nothing wrong.
Like it was all my fault,
and it had been all along.

I'm not a saint from heaven,
no honey, not even close.
But you're no angel,
you ain't no ******* host.
I ask that no one come to random conclusions about who this poem is about. I can almost guarentee it's not about what you think it is.
Aug 2010 · 454
Dearest Andrew
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
The moon shone down,
illuminating the night.
I wrestle with you,
I pick up a fight.

We laugh and giggle,
making a scene.
Everyone jokes,
no words that are mean.

I break away from you,
to see a message from him.
I see the hurt in your eyes,
the anger within.

We break away,
from the group over there.
Go for a walk,
around back somewhere.

When I ask what's wrong,
you make a face.
You say it's hard,
and you made a mistake.

You left back then,
so long ago.
For another girl,
who did not show.

Now you're realizing it all,
but it's too late.
I've fallen for him,
he is my fate.

Your blue eyes glisten,
in the bright moon light.
I give you a hug,
warming you 'till sunlight.

I promise, dear friend,
it will be alright.
People come and go,
with grace and with fight.

I promise you dear,
I will not leave.
Not here, not ever,
my best friend you'll be <3
Aug 2010 · 470
Six Billion Lies
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
She walks looking down
she walks with a twist
Her real self concealed
her real self doesn't exist

He walks like he owns them
he walks with self esteem
He puts on a face
he's who they want him to be

She works two jobs
she works herself to the bone
She's caring for a child
she's all on her own

He's in the family buisness
he's tired of it all
He wants to be his own person
he doesn't want to hide behind a wall

She's scared to tell her parents
she's terrified what they'll do
She sits with a razor blade
she cries over her passed and future  too

These people you see
we see them day to day
But we don't see the hurt
and suffering in every way

Six billion people roam this earth
day to day camoflauging reality
Six billion people scared to death
of who they can really be

When you see a person
what thoughts cross your mind?
There's a story to each
and a truth behind each lie
Aug 2010 · 500
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
It's a lie,
it's a twist,
it's a word behind their back.

It's a poem,
it's a fist,
it's the confidence we lack.

It's the truth,
there's no lies,
and it's everything we know.

It's begging,
it's reason,
for you to never go.

The maturity,
the age,
the hormones that race.

The anger,
the frusteration,
written across our face.

It's life.
at it's worst,
and there's nothing we can do.

It's highschool,
it's drama,
it's me trapped with you.

Words fly,
hearts crushed,
life doesn't make sense.

Guys cry,
girls weep,
we all put up that fence.

I say,
it's about time,
to break those fences down.

Time to see,
what's really hidden,
deep beneath our frowns.

No lies,
no acts,
just truth down to the core.

What would,
this life me,
if we were to hurt no more?

Constant battle,
constant fear,
hidden deep within me.

Look farther,
look deeper,
and tell me what you see.

I want,
I need,
for this to all make sense.

I have,
the urge to,
please break down this fence.

Let's begin,
from the start,
let's sort all of this out.

No screaming,
no crying,
there is no reason to shout.

It's life,
it's drama,
it's highschool at the worst.

I want to smile,
let's be happy,
be free of all this hurt.
Aug 2010 · 427
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
Her bright blue eyes,
well they make you soar.
Her laugh and smile,
leave you wanting more.

My eyes just brown,
my body not as fine.
Your smile and laugh,
leave me wishing you were mine.

I'm jealous of her,
and all she has in you.
You want her,
and I'll be alone with nothing to do.

You were mine, baby,
for a pretty little while.
But then you left and ran,
for what seems like miles.

I've tried so hard,
so reach your heart.
But there's so much space,
we're torn apart.

I am not nothing,
but someone who makes you mad.
I wish I could be more,
I remember what we had...

She's everything and more,
a beautiful young lady.
I can't help but cry,
envy her maybe.

I can't help but picture,
you two together.
Cuddleing, spending time,
close in stormy weather.

But I'm alone on the couch,
all curled up just me.
No one's here, you're there,
with her you're gonna be...
Aug 2010 · 442
Within The Heart
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
She walks on a road of twists,
the turns going every which way.
She makes choices and decisions,
anything but easy days.

But the days are becoming simplier,
a little happier too.
With someone who comforts her,
a boy who calls her boo.

He stands by her side,
a very best friend.
He lets her know this is not,
and will never be the end.

When everyone else is yelling,
he helps her stand tall.
They're all cheering, baby,
fall, *****, fall.

But he holds her close,
he kisses her lips.
He's holding her up high,
his hands on her hips.

They're soaring through the wind,
no matter how far apart.
They're always near to eachother,
close within the heart.
Aug 2010 · 551
Moments You Were Mine <3
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
Your eyes matched the sky,
bright and blue today.
This moment was just perfect,
in each and every way.

My mind is spinning,
in a hundred different ways.
I'm searching for all the words,
the right ones to say.

Your lips were on mine,
nothing could compare.
The way you looked at me,
your fingers in my hair.

My breath was stopping,
I felt I couldn't breathe.
All I knew was that,
I wanted you here with me.

Your hands upon my back,
running up and down.
I never wanted to go away,
never leave this town.

Your body so close,
feeling you against me.
This is everything I wanted,
everything we could be.

Your smile spreading wide,
across a familiar face.
I never wanted it to end,
didn't want to leave this place.

But I'm sure we'll back there,
I hope it's some time soon.
I silently sit and cry,
wishing upon a moon.

That feeling you gave me,
it was unlike any before.
You left me screaming at the stars,
baby, I want more.

You're everything I fell for,
way back when.
Everything I need now,
you're more than my good friend.

You've always had a place,
special in my heart.
Even when you left last year,
and we've been far apart.

I'll never forget the day,
I'll never forget this time.
The moments we spent together,
the moments you were mine.
Aug 2010 · 12.7k
It's All My Fault, I'm Sorry.
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
I tell you I only take part of the blame,
but in my mind I take it all.
I act to them like I'm doing much better,
but all I can do lately is fall.

I wish you would look at me and see,
I wish you would understand.
I feel like it was ALL my fault...
I wish you would be the one to hold my hand...

You were always there when things were wrong,
when things got way too tough.
Even though I love you with all of my heart,
I'm afraid lately love is not enough.

I'm blaming myself for everything,
and I have since we began.
I'm screaming out to the world, darling,
won't you hold my hand?

I want to be able to walk away together,
from all the rubble and dust.
Leave this place and all of the ashes,
getting coffee together is a must.

I wish you knew, darling,
that I blame myself everyday.
And I wish I could change it all,
in every single way.

I wish you knew, sweetheart,
all I want is just one more chance.
For you to look me in the eyes,
to take and hold my hands.

To tell me it's not true,
my thoughts are merely lies.
It's not all my fault,
and you're coming to stay by my side.

I miss you like you wouldn't believe,
and I'm willing to start again.
Please say you'll give me the chance,
and be, again, my very best friend...<3
Aug 2010 · 504
Can You Hear Me?
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
You're all disappearing ...

And I'm sitting here alone...

You're walking away from me...
                                                          My best friend ....

This time you chose to walk away...
                                                          No more chances...

There's a fog and it's getting deeper...
                                                          You're disappearing...
                                                                                    You're going away...

I'm feel alone and I'm getting scared...
                                                           Save Me....
                                                                                     Help Me...

The blade is getting closer...
                                                            Take it...
                                                                                     Burry it...

The blood bleeds a scarlet red...

I can't stop this time...
                                                              This is it...
                                                                                       Final line...

The battle lines have been drawn...
                                                                 I'm fading...
                                                                                         I'm crying...

                                                                                                                I'm screaming...
                                                                                                            Can You Hear Me?
Aug 2010 · 506
Don't You Realize?
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
She looks across a wide open sky,
makes a wish and begins to cry.
This day is coming to an end,
she waves goodbye to a departing friend.

He kisses her cheek,
he holds her close.
He tells her he wants her,
what he misses most...

She's walking now away from it all,
trips on the sidewalk, begins to fall.
She kneels there waiting for life to make sense,
trying to break down her very own fence.

The tears are coming,
rolling down her cheeks.
As she kneels on the sidewalk,
begining to weep.

The blood is dripping down her sorry face,
she's walking now at a much faster pace.
She's running away from all that she's known,
running away with no where to go.

Anywhere but here,
would be so much better.
Somewhere with sun,
and cooler weather.

The kids on the sidewalk are playing with cards,
she remembers her life back when it was not so hard.
When scraped up knees were the deepest wounds,
and bedtime came always way too soon.

She's wishing back then,
to go back in time.
When she was a child,
when everything was fine.

The sun is now setting down below the water ahead,
she's regretting her life and the words that were said.
Wishing for forgiveness is all she can do,
she screams at the top of her lungs, "DON'T YOU REALIZE I LOVE YOU?!"
Aug 2010 · 693
I Need An Angel
Jolene Perron Aug 2010
I feel like everything I do means nothing,
like what I say doesn't affect anyone.
I feel like walking away from it all,
but I just don't want to give up.

He used to make my heart fly and feelings soar,
but now he only makes me cry.
I don't want to give up on all we had,
I know we can be so much more.

She was my very best friend,
someone who I could always confide in.
Now she won't even talk to me,
and I can't figure out why...

I'm trying to make myself happy this time,
but everyone else gets mad.
It's like what I want doesn't even matter,
and what I need isn't relevant.

I've spent my life trying to make everyone else happy,
and for once I'm trying to do stuff for me.
But everyone else is throwing fits,
and everyone is ****** at me.

I can't make you all happy,
I can't make my life make sense.
I'm lost and confused and I'm sitting here crying,
I'm waiting for someone to come and climb over this wall.

Doesn't anyone see the signs?
don't you all see me, sitting here, crying, alone.
Why don't you try to help me along,
what is so wrong with me that I can't do it on my own.

I can't make my life make sense anymore,
and I'm reaching for the blade.
As long as I was clean before,
that changed and I can't make it stop.

I'm struggling and I'm fighting and I'm crying out,
but no one around seems to hear.
Please someone just make some sense out of life,
please send me some kind of guidence....

**I need an Angel
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