Stainless steel,
the sharp edge, to the smooth side
gentle shaking hands, slowly raise it to a point
small fingers run along the blade
an oh so fine tip, as sharp as their hateful gaze
it pierces the skin

Racing thoughts come to a slow
time seems to freeze as the cold blade gives my smooth wrist chills

it gets easier from here

not to swift
nor to slow
the blade cuts though skin and flesh
igniting the fire deep inside
the adrenaline begins to rush

my heart and drugged up mind scream deeper
as a small, lost voice whispering "no..." is hushed
so very quickly
my problems, my dreams, my emotions shatter

steady hands pull away
the deep line turns red as I lay my quiet head back
the warm, sweet blood slides down my wrist
easing the cold feeling

the more the blood runs, the better I feel
releasing me from sorrow and pain
but only for a short while

wounds heal over, only scars left behind
the memory just a blur
the burning sensations cools
until the need comes roaring back
the blade comes back out

but until then I can rest my head

Once upon a time
          I wrote this poem

because my friends are mean
and said rude things on facebook.

la tee dah tee dah
insert deep poetic words

I hate you all.
(Grant, Jeff, and Emily.)

I'm a poetic genius, *****.

If I fall asleep tonight,
never to wake up.
I'll dream of the brightest light,
and you're unending love.
My ears will ring with laughter,
the air filled with white.
Our families merged together,
and your hand grasped in mine.

If I were to close my eyes,
and take my final breath.
My thoughts would be of blue skies,
and the heart beat in your chest.
Of a growing stomach to rest my hand,
with gleeful kicking feet.
And your courage there to help me stand,
when I fear I am too weak.

If you were to ask me,
what my fondest memory would be.
I'd have to tell you simply,
it was one I'd yet to see.
So if I died today,
I'd miss an awful lot.
Like our wedding, and our baby.
Like the house we'll fill with love.

Dedicated to Sean Rogers.

I'm tossing and turning
drowning in a sea of sheets
in a bed twice the size of my own
until I awake to find his arms
reaching for me
coiling around my body
and keeping me close
till I can breathe again.

you try way too hard.
There is no depth
in the hundreds of words
that spill from your pen.
Is there more to you?
Nay, you are shallow,
though you wish to believe not.

You are a body
filled with cliche's of
boring spiderweb sentences
and stringy muscles
that are words.

Stolen eyes,
like stolen phrases you hide
deep within the chorus.

Paralyzing true minds.

I am no poet, only poetic
who could never kiss the moon
in the evening twilight;
nor a man with a heart of roses,
to exude the fragrance of his love.

I am no poet, who can pen
profound mysteries about the past,
nor a man of beautiful promises
to be kept safe until the world is dust.

I am no poet, only poetic
who could never touch the souls
of every woman’s dreams;
nor a man with arms of a gladiator,
to protect her forever
from the shadows of her grief.

And as the sun sets in the horizon
from another blemished morning end,
resembles tears of thine eyes;
for my love for you, my majesty,
will never be enthroned
into your kingdom,
like when I am with you,
like I am to you,
my tongue speaks,
I am no poet, only poetic.

Eyes were poisoned by these incurable tears,
lost in a vivid imagery of how we used to be ---
you used to be the angel of my dreams;
reviving the past, finding a relief for myself,
leaving those memories; I can forget you soon ---
only if I will drown my sorrows
at the depths of acceptance in every truth.

"I can move on", "I can wait for her, even forever"
"There's no problem it's her choice anyway",
"Maybe someday I can find someone too",
"May God bless their love story",
"Hope her lover would never hurt her",
Yes! I uttered words which sound so beautiful,
but honestly, I lied, only to hide from people.

Well, you know what hurts me
the most right now?

It's your SMILE...

...because I know it's not for me anymore.