I'm reading poetry at the cremation ghat
amid chanting of God's name
while ferrying and burning the dead.

The noise unsettles me a bit
as sets me thinking of my own death
that by all means seems closer than farther.

Yet I get the relieving feel
reading poems would heal
all the agonies of my flesh
and take me to that spiritual level
where I would take death as
passing into another dimension.

I'm not much of a religious person
but have always felt devoted to my kindred
seeking transcendence through them.

The best thing I'm hoping right now
is when I burn
someone would amid chanting of God's name
read poetry at the burning ghat.

I've got too many questions and not enough answers.
Have you got some wisdom to share?
I'm far out at sea, no wind's blowing for me.
I'll take any truth you can spare.

"Three points of contact! Cover your bases!
Hedge all your bets, but shoot for the stars!
Follow your dream, but remember your zip code!
Keep some of it liquid--invest in gold bars!"

Wherever I look and whoever I ask,
Their words only lead me astray.
There must be a wise man, a really old wise man,
Who truly can show me the way.

Tossing and turning, sleep now eludes me.
I get up to wash off my face.
Stumbling into the bathroom, I flip on the light switch,
and the mirror blows up in my face.

There stands an old guy in the mirror before me!
Where is the face that was mine?
The wrinkled old guy looking back from my eyes
Says in my voice, "You'll be fine!"

What can he mean? And who can he be?
And what's going on around here?
He says, "One more thing: you don't need to worry--
You really have nothing to fear!"

"But how do I know if I'm doing what's right?"
He says, "Trust your heart and your soul.
You're doing that now, just keep on without doubt!
You're well on your way to be whole."

"But what if it doesn't work out like I planned?"
What if my dreams go astray?"
"Then make your dreams bigger than ever before,
Plant seeds and stay out of the way."

"To harness the power that's waiting to help you,
Feel free to dream big and dream bold
What do you want most to give to the world?
That no one be homeless or cold?"

"Whatever you want to change in the world--
You can! Just start where you are.
Keep singing your song 'til a friend sings along
Go ahead and shoot for the stars!"

"The very best piece of advice I can give:
Find something that's near to God's heart,
Bring more love and kindness into the world,
She'll help you right from the start."

"Maybe Jesus was just a guy who was sure
that love could make the world better.
Of course he was right and it still seems to help,
until it comes down to the letter."

"Now it's your turn to shine," the wise man concluded.
"Don't think that you can't, 'cause you do.
Give all that you've got in that warm heart of yours,
You'll find that big dreams do come true!"

Comes a time
when the mathematics
of the years
becomes more about
- than +,
÷ rather than x.

When wisdom gained
< vitality lost,
and dis-ease > health.

A good night's sleep
and some energy ≈
happiness.

Living is
tangential
to survival,
and not
necessarily
congruent.

last night i laid in bed next to my sister
and recounted the ways we had both
tried to squeeze ourselves
into the sausage casing
society said we should fit into

how she spent 2 years waiting
until 2 pm to allow her body nourishment

how i had made it to 27 and suddenly
had the epiphany that i could
starve myself to the size i wanted be

how our father and grandfather
spent endless moments passing
judgments on our bodies and
smashing us into the ground
with each pound that graced our wide hips

how she told everyone she
was a runner, but couldn't
hide from her roommates worried
glances at her bones poking through
workout clothes that never got a
drip of sweat on them

how i taught young girls to love
themselves day after day,
while i shook and trembled from
the lack of love i had for myself

last night we laughed about how
skewed our views had become
from our grandma and mother
telling us their weight, analyzing
their curves in the mirror as we
laid in their beds watching and learning

i vowed to harbor a warrior in my
womb one day who i could speak
freely with about the horrors of
self hatred and hopefully instill
a strong foundation of faith in self

i hope one day i raise someone
who never looks in the mirror and
wishes pieces of herself away

i hope one day i raise someone
who sees herself fully, not just as a shell
of a human worth nothing more than
the label on her clothes and
the number on the scale

i hope one day i raise someone
who sees herself most worthy of love