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12
Jocelyn Juarez Jul 2016
12
12 a number of deep scars on her skin
12 times she gave up
12 moments she found herself holding the blade in her hands
1 attempt to end it all like a game
2 blades she took care of as if they were her life
Oh, but they were her life

12 cuts that remain a memory on her skin
12 years of age and feeling like a lost fisherman at sea
3 years old and she already lost sense of a normal childhood
Her world the one full of stars shattered right before her eyes
Going to a place she called home but wasn’t a home
Going to a place she was filled with fear
Fear caused by a pair of hands she thought were to protect and not hurt

She didn’t want to be in fear
She wanted her end to be near
By 4 years old she was independent like a 11 year old
Showering and dressing herself before mother could see how ***** and used she actually was
Bruised up, used up, torn, broken
So that blade was her golden token

12 goals and dreams she gave up on
12 times father promised he wouldn’t hurt mother anymore
12 times she was told to let herself be touched because no one would love her either way
12 times her brother said “don’t tell mom”
1 time she made her little sister a promise to not let brother hurt her ever again
1 time breaking that promise led to losing her little sister

Bruised up, used up, torn… broken
With a golden token
She found a way out after 11 years
She spread her broken wings and emerged out of darkness
Jocelyn Juarez Jul 2016
My love for you will never fade
Sure for you I'd bleed myself dry
But I shall not let you cry
Oh even if I die
Tonight you'll be the love of my love
Tomorrow you will still be
You're perfect to me
My love, can't you see?
I love you
I've always loved you
I've always chosen you
you just never chose me
Hell, you don't even know I existed
until now
01-01 It started
A new year
A new love cycle
A new start
and it all started with you
sure you put me through hell once
Forgave you I did
Forget I cannot
It's not a memory I like to keep
But it's buried deep
this poem is part of seris of poems I will be adding soon, enjoy

— The End —