i am breathing, breathing
breathe in and out
get your head outta the clouds
someone get me down

got myself stuck
looking for an easy way out

disappear, disappear
just let me float away
held my heel, held my weakness
immortalize my brain

got myself exposed
looking for an easy way out

half ghost and half wannabe
cross the border
let go of a piece of me
chaos, disorder

got myself severed
looking for an easier way out
just an easy way out

half ghost and half wannabe (breathing, breathing)
cross the border (in and out)
let go of a piece of me (get out, get out)
chaos, disorder (someone please get me down)
chaos, disorder (get me down)
chaos, disorder (easy way out)

just cross the border

we circled each other like strange, timid animals of prey
you’d never seen me crazy
but you’d never given me a reason to try
so discarded you mark me
shelf me as that little girl who’ll never understand



now here we are parked in your car
the orchard is quiet tonight
echoing the silence we are disrupting
before you can take my hand and preach your lies
I pop the door and take off

you sigh believing me to still be a child
until you get out to fetch me
and in the dark you see my top before you
do you question what’s underneath me
like you do what’s under the rest of my clothes

no where in sight is the little girl you once knew
intuitively you head toward the pond
contemplating new baptisms
or finally cleaning off layered dust to find reality
wondering what tragedies I’ll bring you this time

do I still make you feel like a young boy as I jump
in the water covered by mere splashes and starlight
are you surprised by the me I am here
that the me you barely knew was fraud
or rather only a mask as painted as your own

You have one unheard message
Hey. It's me. Just wanted to say I love you. Have a nice day at work. Call me when you're on your way, okay?

You have two unheard messages
Hey. It's me again. Where are you? I miss you. It's late and I'm cold and you aren't here.

I know you're sad, but you can't do this. It's not how things work. Please don't leave me alone. Just... Just answer your phone, **** it. I need you. You're important.

You have three unheard messages
Why'd you do it? I needed you. I need you. It's a joke right? A prank? Well, it's not funny anymore. I need you back. I just... I just want to hear your voice again. You're so beautiful. Please come back to-

I ran out of time. I just want you back. Why did you do this?  I want to see you again. I need to see you again. But not like at your funeral. Like you were when you lived.

They said I have to stop calling you. I don't know how to stop. I love you. I can't do this without you. But don't worry, love, I'll see you again soon, it's only a matter of minutes until we're together.

You have no new messages

You know more about me
than any stranger should.
You know more about me
than any friend could.
It's not always easy
to post the things I write
Because they are more of myself,
that I don't like to share.
My poems are me and me alone.
I hope you like them,
but more, I hope you like me,
even if I'm a mess.

They say that we're lucky,
and we are,
To live in a safe town,
Where nobody dies
and there's little crime.

But it's a lie,
They say it's safe here,
It's better here,
But nowhere is safe.

Because down by the train tracks,
The bartender of a little bar
was ***** and murdered
in the parking lot.
They left her naked,
No dignity, not even in death.

I know that I'm far safer
than a lot of others,
But the truth is,
Nowhere is safe,
Not here, not in the country,
Not in the city,
Nowhere is safe.

I stare at my feet
As I walk through the crowded hall
And think about you

Tears ***** my eyes
As my feelings well over

I miss you so terribly
And so deeply
I want to tell you that joke I heard last period
Or what I'm doing this Saturday
Or what I had for breakfast

But you are gone
And with every footstep
I hear your name
Swirl by in the voices of others.

Leaving me to wonder,
How can I be so alone in a place so full of people?

Shall I compare thee to a winters day?
Thou art more cold and more merciless.