Love is metal wires,
Bent upward,
Knotted together
In matrimony--Or fear--
I've never known which.
As for me? Well;
I'm a bird.
And I refuse to
Have my wings clipped.

Darling is it bad that I don't feel the sun anymore?
I'm afraid I've broken myself again.
Afraid that someday I'll lay down and feel the need not to push myself to wake up again.
Darling is it bad that I don't see the stars in the sky anymore?
The ones I use to lay in the grass and look up to.
The ones I use to make the same wish on every night they somehow disappeared and I can't seem to remember that wish.
Darling is it bad that sometimes I think the walls are screaming at me when I'm alone?
I don't do all that well in the quiet green room I have when no one is home.
Maybe that's why I found peace in a razor to block out the quiet
Darling is it okay to stop and not think for awhile?
Just lay in one spot and forget about it all?
Darling can I stop and think about you for a while?
I think your the only thing I like thinking about.
Being okay for a little feels good.
Feels like those walls can move and breathe around me.
Darling I'm afraid I'm not good enough anymore.
I can't fix myself like I have been trying too.
It's hard putting the pieces back together when I can't find them.
I would search my soul and my heart for these pieces that I lost but I get so tired, I gave up.
Darling is it wrong that I want to be prefect?
Prefect for you and myself so being alive doesn't have to be a chore anymore?
Darling. Don't leave.
I've already gaven up on myself that I can't have one more person write me off.
Darling would you be mad at me if I leave?
I would never leave you but if one day I disappear you can look up in the stars, that's were I'd be.
I've always found peace in stars.
Maybe I'll be one one day.
Maybe one day you will be looking up at one and it will be me.
Darling maybe you will remember the wish I always wished while looking up at me.

The demon took up residence within me
Sitting silent still and quiet
As my dull blank face
Stared unblinking into the long night
Waiting for that
Which would never appear

His eyes flickered green
This creature created from my darkest dreams
Brought to life by violence and tears
Lonely echoing screams

In my twisted thoughts he dwell
Upon each hour
Rang his cursed bell
Planting infectious evil
Hell's seeds
Deep into my empty heart

I called out
In my hurt and despair
Reaching for a hand that was not there
Allowing him to overtake me
Plunging head long into the endless void of hate

This poem is copyrighted and stored in author base. All material subject to Copyright Infringement laws
Section 512(c)(3) of the U.S. Copyright
Act, 17 U.S.C. S512(c)(3), Tammy M. Darby

Nothing's heard
Of the words
Told to the jet black sky.
Nobody listened.
They didn't care.
Too absorbed with material things
I shouldn't have shared.
I always give,
Give,
Give,
Only to have them take,
Take,
Take.
Is that the Holy thing to do?
Is He happy with me?
Or disappointed
Like everyone
Everyone else,
Who I have tried,
to prove wrong,
To make proud.
*jm

i love that gentle touch you have left for me
                             after 11 at night
when we're lost in breathing
and holding onto
                                         future struggles
i love the slight pitch change of your voice
when you laugh at my jokes
               and chuckle when my voice breaks
after 1am as it always does
                                                  when im tired
i love that you ask if im feeling well
inquiring about the last mental
                                                  breakdow­n i had
simply needing to know
that im okay
                          not what why when
i love how you call me
               sweetie
                     dear
                        love
to catch my attention
to ask what time it is
and whether i need sleep
by which its 2am
and im in love with you

I avoid the nights because I''m scared of the darksness
I escape from sleep because I don't know if I'll wake up
I stay up all night because I'm scared of the morning
I'm scared of the night
I'm scared of the dawn
I'm scared of every second of every day

If I sleep it only makes it worse
What if I dream?
I can't control my dreams
Maybe you would be in them
What if you're not in them?

I'm scared
That's why I stay up
At least then I have my eyes to search
And maybe I'll find the monster
Before it finds me