It's been a journey
Of ups and downs
A rollercoaster ride
I never want
To be on
Ever again

Despite that
I'm blessed
For my friends
For my parents
For the love of my life
For my beautiful dog
For all the memories
We have shared
And captured
Throughout
This year

Have a good 2014
May the year
Be a blessed one

It's come to that time of the year when everyone wants to be a different person in anticipation for the new year.
I've got no new year's resolution and hold no fear
I just wanna be more happy and enjoy each day
And when dark moments come I just wanna have the strength to create my own shiny ray
It's the same boring routine each time
You make wishes and break them before the first month runs off
Every day is precious to me and each adds to my history
And as much as I want to be a better person, it's not by setting a time to do it.
Anytime the opportunity comes for me to make the change, I will.
Easy does it, and I'm going to take it real slow.
Happy new year.

With a simple glance at the monster
Icy chills are sent down my spine
And my mind goes back to the eleven-year-old mind I once had
Hurt and confused
By the words that pour out of the monster's mouth
Each one causing a permanent scar on my body
That not even all of the therapists I've been through can fix

The only thing I can't figure out
Is why
Not why it said all of the awful things it did
But why I believed them

I allowed myself to believe anything that came from the monster's mouth
Like a child believes their parents
About Santa Claus
Or the tooth fairy

And just like that child
I grew out of the monster's lies

I have a purpose
I keep trying to tell myself
Now believing a whole new sort of lie
For the monster's lies
are now my truth

i read old messages for endless hours
why? because i miss what was ours
you were my very best friend
you were my soulmate
i hate how we let it all
simply go to waste
haven't met you
in the flesh
but i want to
next year
i want to see your face
and hope feelings re-appear
i want to feel your warmth
and just see you smile
it would make me glad
even for just a while
you are the one i see
when i look at the stars
you are the one i seek
every single night
i always wrap up
in a blanket
wishing it was you
holding me
instead of it
every night
same old thing
i miss your texts
i miss your everything
i miss you and i miss your love
you still fit me like a glove

You make me see
That I am only what I let myself be
What I let you see is only parts of me

You are the one nobody can feel
I am the one who is never real just more or less concealed
In this life we would be too unreal

You keep me awake
Even though I have never seen the way your head will shake
When you to tell me that I'm wrong...
Yet this is the place I feel like I belong

2.36 am
You keep my thoughts spinning around in my head
In the place where I lie
It's here
alone
In my bed

Music is still on in the backround
But my thoughts shut it out and turns it into something distant
I wish that...

I see fire by Ed Sheeran
Keep the music playing
I want to know
I need to know what other people are saying

2.40 am
Stop it
We can't ever be we
Drop it
Us can never be something we could see
**** it
There wont be a You And Me

2.47 am
Stop the music
Let me sleep
Stop the thoughts
Let me dream