i ******* hate you all
ripping pictures of the wall
can this one thing not be about you
or will you twist this narrative too

will you try make someone else the monster
for needing space and not being okay
will you push farther and farther
using excuses to worsen their pain

i don't know why you're like this
tragedy gets you excited
cause you see an opportunity
to receive so much sympathy

from people who don't really care about you
but thats not even the point
you just need to feel important
so you try to become the only voice

in a situation where many are hurt
and hurt them more with your selfish words
this is why everyone ignores your cries
just go too far to prove why you're right

when you are just being selfish
you just can't help it
it's gonna be such a lonely day
when you've pushed everyone away

because you can't let anyone 'win'
cause to you trauma is a competition
can you just respect someone you say you love
even when you're not with them

it's that raise in pitch
when you say my name
i wait for you to see me
but you can't look straight
all your excuses
start to sound the same

a little detail
reveals a big lie
a little change
that bothers my eyes
i know you too well
i am still suprised

it's in the way you speak so freely
then retreat into your mind
the harder your you try
the easier it is to see what you hide
your face is riddled with guilt
but you're drowning in pride

shouldve known better
than to lie to me
i will always find
what you are hiding
there's not a part of you
i havent seen

it's my nature to apologize
like its my job to hold open the door
for people who chose slam it
in my face
i'm tired of being sorry
for things i'm not even sorry for
out here hurting feelings
that were never my responsibility in the first place

always holding my tongue
for the sake of peace
why must i be numb
to enjoy your company

just don't understand
but i don't care to at this point
you talk too much as is
i hear crazy things when i'm out
too self aggrandizing to
be at peace with your own choice
that anger has done you no good
but you stand by it even now

you're never gonna learn
and that's why your unhappy
pushing me away
to prove what exactly

you do what benefits you
then say it's what's best for me
afraid to lose somebody
you tried to force into your life
i don't have it in me
focused on my own needs
you want something impossible
an effort i cannot provide

because i'm not stuck on you
the way you've clung to me
got too comfortably rude
and lost my company

and i don't care if you have any regrets
i waited a very long time
tried to be there even when every bone
in my body begged me to leave
but you never changed and even if you do
i'm no longer invested in your life
you really expected me to tolerate your ****
must've never thought much of me

uncomfortable in your presence
avoiding the situation
you want to **** us both
into the awkwardness you've created
by forgetting who i am
and lashing out over something dumb
mistook kindness for love
sadly i'm not the one
can not be complacent to your fantasies
i've got my own happiness to be concerned with
aren't you just so pitiful
i want you out of my presence
i'm glad you're walking out of my life
you're pushing me away to prove what exactly?
if you think you'll win by playing games and being petty
you'll always be unhappy
this is why i can't stand you
you're so childish and you don't really care about my feelings
you just wanna use me
so you can feel things

no mistakes here
did that **** on purpose
created the situation
but don't feel you deserve it
look where you are now
are happy by yourself
do you regret how you reacted
will you try to blame somebody else
for all the problems in your life
once again and make no change
and turn the anger inside of you
towards the ones you claim
to care for because honestly
i don't care to know the outcome
after all the **** you pulled
i am past beyond done