youcancallmesierra

youcancallmesierra Feb 2021

i don't wanna go
if that means saying goodbye
but i know if i don't
that's asking a lot

i don't wanna know
if it'll make it harder to lie
guess i should just go
but my legs feel locked.

and i wish we could go back to being strangers
so i wouldn't know the things that you would do
it'd be so easy to give into this anger
but i'll get no joy from hurting you

just wanna know why you did it
why you did this
i cant fix it
how could you
stunned and sickened
thoughts all twisted
i don't wanna miss it
but i do

youcancallmesierra Feb 2021

gone missing

don't wanna be
the girl who changed her mind
the stereotype
i don't even love another guy
i just dont love you

at first
it all was going fine
but you changed overnight
you stopped treating me right
what was i supposed to do

i tried to
be there for you
but you didn't want me to
tried to pretend we were cool
but **** was falling apart

i started
to lose patience too
and get numb towards you
acknowledging the issues
and how broken i felt in my heart

you're not
some villain or the worst
you just don't know how to use your words
or only use the ones that hurt
and i still don't wanna fight you

it's not about
seeing you hurt
but i'm past making this work
i know what i deserve
done trying to find you

youcancallmesierra Feb 2021

the way things are

sometimes
if things would stay the same
that would be great

but that's not
the way things are
we've all nursed a broken heart

or two
it's part of the human existence
gotta learn to live with it

youcancallmesierra Feb 2021

that's unfortunate

i know it's wrong but i laugh
knowing she hurt you like i said she would
you wouldn't listen when i told you
that she was up to no good

you walked away knowing how that'd make me feel
stupid and invisible
let our friendship die
over someone who saw you as dispensable
you decided that a little attention
was worth being miserable
defended actions
that were literally indefensible

and now that you're wounded
it's in my nature to want to fix
it all and make it better
yet its easy to resist
you pushed me away
and decided it was worth the risks
if you would've valued me
i'd be happy to assist

but you stranded me
and let me fall on my knees
you helped that evil *****
find joy in seeing me bleed
and no sorry
will ever make that right
you were comfortable with
letting me die

youcancallmesierra Feb 2021

but if it happened to you...

go on and pour it all out
can you put it back in now
just the way it was
nothing can ever be undone

it's not that hard to understand
stop saying that you can't

youcancallmesierra Feb 2021

other plans

you don't question blessings
so i let it slide
seemed too good to be true
but i didn't mind
wanted to be part of something great
so i didn't look into the lies
never wanted us to change
so i turned aside when i chose to cry

because i didn't want to shatter the fantasy
with the doubts i fostered
i was swallowed in thoughts
but tried to seem unbothered
you were all i wanted
a dream i felt i manifested
you pushed me away
and i couldn't process it

couldn't accept
that you didn't love me
couldn't believe
you would just leave
but here we are
and yes you did
i hate you for
doing this
for reopening wounds
and not meaning i love you
now i got trust issues
romantically *******

youcancallmesierra Jan 2021

reversion

when i told you to leave
i really hoped you'd choose me
and when you didn't
i needed you to go

at first i couldn't believe
but it made sense eventually
i was better off
and you got left alone

you got what you wanted
and it was fun while it lasted
i tried to help you save yourself
but you wouldn't have it
i warned you before i left
and you still let this happen
in the aftermath
i'm not ecstatic

but is it wrong that i when i heard
that she hurt you like i said she would
i laughed but i hope you heal well

i would help if i could
but you are a lost cause to me
and you put me through a similar hell