I hate how empty I am
because I thought
I had the universe inside of me

but I cried all the black holes out of my veins

the volcanoes inside of my rib cage erupted when you told me you loved me but didn't want me and
the lava flooded out, burning my skin alive and hardened me until I
couldn't close my eyes to sleep

I had stars in my brain
shining bright
but I've burned them all
with all the drugs I've been taking
just to burn you out of my mind

the garden growing at the bottom of my stomach is dead because it seems to be that I can't water them with alcohol  

I had the sun above my head always following me but it's been covered by the gray clouds with no rain making my thoughts turn into darkness

I had the planets at the tip of my tongue but you took them all away with you

leaving me with just myself

I was everything
and then I met you
and you were everything

but now you're gone with all of me
and now I can't find myself in this universe that I thought once was all mine

j.f

It's been raining all night long
As I was singing sad love songs
Look at the sky so dark and gloomy
The air so damp and warm and lazy

Looking out from my window
The streets were wet and sloppy as the rain came slowly and doggedly down
As though it had not even the spirit to pour
Thats exactly how I feel tonight... Sad, emotionless, empty and lonely

I pray for a little sunshine
Will there a little light at the end?
Will warmth once more fill my heart?
Banish sadness from my soul?
Bring new joy after long wet days
A new life, a new start for what has yet to come


Begone dark clouds of sadness
Begone wet cold begone
Welcome to this brand new life
Welcome a new beginning
Although the rain has played its part
The sun will warm the living

The storm has left my aching heart
No more sorrow, no more pain
Dark clouds have been lifted from my mind
By sunshine after rain

She says,'goodnight'
but I wait
she might not mean it.
Bit by bit
I realise
that she does.

The peace with which you rest
Reminds us: You were
Somewhere
Else before.
This world, it screams in violent
Dreams, but you know
Not the ways
Of war.

Deepest contrast -black to bright-
The way you smile
While others fight.
Could it be behind those
Eyes you see
The true
Reality?

The adult here is you alone,
The child is rampant
-Running free.
Fighting over toys and candy
While you're resting
Peacefully.

My Judas pen
betrays my broken heart
over and over again.
A thousand papercuts
no contest
for it's incessant bleeding
nor it's insistence 
on opening ancient wounds
as the sun rises
dragging me startled
kicking and screaming
from the comfort of unknowing slumber
into the harsh light of my existence
to bleed for you once more.