the sting it brings to your heart
the water it brings to your eyes
the sickness it brings to your stomach
So, how does it feel?
feeling what you have done to me?
do you enjoy the pain?
now suddenly you feel this way.
now you feel the regret.
now you feel disease you gave to me.
I was always there for you.
I gave you my trust.
I gave you my happiness.
& you crushed it with me along with it.

NO !
no , there's no more chances.
NO!
no, there's no more pity.
NO!
no, there's no more sympathy.
NO!
there is no more.
I cant take this anymore.

So, how does it feel?
how does it feel like to be like me?
how does it feel to see, what you made me to be?
how could you betray the ONLY girl
that gave you nothing but her love ?
her life to fulfill your happiness?
just to see your smile?
just to feel your touch?
just you.

& you betrayed me.

How does it feel silly boy?
to lose the only girl that loved you as much
as I did.

Just tell me.
How does it feel?

How does it feel.

" are you alright? "
I don't know am I ?
do I look like it?
does it seem like it?
do I act like it?
am I alright?
you tell me.
Leave me alone!
leave me alone!
im so numb I cant feel the pain anymore!
Go away!
go away!
please please, why wont you walk away?
Cant you see it?
CANT YOU SEE IT!
I don't smile like I used to.
laugh like I used to.
love like I used to.
Are you just playing?

does it look like I can handle this?
does it look like im strong enough?
every second.
I cry more.
I sigh more.
I want to die more.
every minute
I scream more.
I sleep more.
every hour
I punch the walls more.
I count my scars more.
every day
cant you see the look in my eyes?
so now you tell me,
does it look like im alright?

I want to feel the sensation
of screaming.
of singing.
I want to feel the vibrations
ring through my finger tips
of an electric guitar,
to my hand
up my arm
& harmonize together in my head.
from the thunder beats of the drums.
from the screeches of the crowd
to the friends behind the stage.
the screams through the speakers.
the rumble of my feet
as I stomp the stage
to please my desire to become insane.
to become free.
I am who I am.
I raise the metal sign in the air.
I raise my middle fingers in the air.
I raise my fists in the air.
I smile with sweat racing down my face
down my back.


I want to feel the sensation
of screaming.
of singing.
I will take the stage.
I will amaze the crowd.

I am such a metal head.

I want to fight.
I want to cry.
I want to scream.

im tired of holding this inside me.
the wolf inside howls with pain.
howls with longing.
howls with rage.

I want to punch the walls.
break the windows.
throw away the memories.
where is my voice?
where is my strength?
where is the air?

I growl with frustration.
I claw with confusion
I howl with rage.
I breath with sadness.


i refuse to contain it any longer.
run free!
run away!
save yourself precious beast,
show yourself.
show your rage.