Spliced

Ohh no
Here we go
Don't know
Who to show

What's my id?
Where am I from?
Once had a name
Now I'm just numb

Captured in this half life
Desert hands
In captured lands
Killing all
Whos wrong and right
Living in this half life
I'm spliced

Don't know who to show
Which puppet is in the know

All it Seems is we are all wired at the seems
Living half lives
Where we each are spliced

Am I dead?
Are you alive?
Is this my dream?
Or is this the time?
That darkness came in
To take my light.

It all seems we are wired at our seems
We all move frantically
Trying to tare them
To break free.

In this mis matched life
We want to be one
But in reality
All we are is spliced.

To someone I once knew
I never got to say goodbye
Yet you were still there
When I thought you had died

I tried, oh lord I tried

Did I disappoint you?
Did you care?
Did you have a choice?
I don't care

I just miss you
And need you back
To help me live again
Put me on track
To that once was strong man
Accepting any challenge he can

Oh I tried, oh lord I tried - I tried

Wonder
If you watch me while I sleep
Or hear me when I weep
Feel me clench so tight
All this wrong, so bad needs right.

I miss you, oh I miss you, lord I miss you.

This was not your choice
Nor was it mine
Was this your destiny?
Was this your time?

My sandcastle I built
Now disappears
With the tide.

I miss you, oh lord I tried, I miss you how I really tried.

To someone I once knew
To the old one who was true
How I need your strength inside
To put this cowering back in line

I miss you
Oh how I tried
I miss you
Lord, oh how I tried.

Dear life,
Let these closings of long battles
And roads of new exploration be my new path for a new serene normalcy.
May these paths lead to answers,
Answers of who I am.
It's been so long since I've been the real me it hurts to a pain staking degree.
Trying to remember what once was me.
Nothings normal, all I once knew is now forgotten and gone.
You cannot expect to accomplish a new road in life, without having the knowledge of how to overcome its new and demanding challenges.  Simply its obstacles are to great to exceed without knowledge. And even scarier to face. Not knowing the unknowing being thrown to survive in the Lions den.
As a writer I write,  my thoughts, feelings and dreams.
I feel like a caged animal
At a zoo, behind glass
Looking at my once life
Now held captive
From this disease.
I miss my old life, I progressed so far.
Able to challenge my strength of mind,body and soul
Each and every day.
Now that is gone.
Grateful yes I am
Sad and *******?
You better bet.
Although grateful, I am not in good standing with the life I lead  now.
I never asked for this change, I loved my then life and only pleaded for the healthiest body. So I may be the best I could be in all strengths from muscular to mental.
I would love to see the old me and old life I once had.
I would apologize with all my might for whatever I did for it to stop accepting me.
Then maybe I would learn how to live this new resistant relationship I am in.
It's hard to accept that your own body is fighting its every move and with its every move it is literally chipping a little by little of your life and freedom away.
All you can do is wonder why and watch it pay severe tolls each day.
If I cannot return to the past then please may my future be at a level of any normalcy that my present future lacks.
For the sake of my mind and all who are a very important part of it.

A world in disarray
Filled with un-truth
Creating hate filled fear

No one can walk down streets
Without having fingers pointing
No one can wear a thing
Without offending another

How does a country so strong
Have so many
Who don't believe in a single thing
It - we - stand for?

Listening to facts,
not what we believe.
Not taking others actions
So personally.

So quickly we erupt
So little do we listen
Offended by intelligence
Offended by answers
Quick to blame others
Quick to shame ourselves.
G-Buda

I look for peace within a crushed and un locked society.
A society of rulers and fools following a road of unimaginable destruction.
Violence erupting over our lands security.  Violence breaking out do to colors on our skin. Violence to be heard. Violence to be understood.
Our future is more near everyday and everyday becomes shorter through time.
We need the strength of one another so then we can have a understanding of our country.
Just because it's controlled,  does not take away that it is still chaos.
If ignored much longer all this rioting, and killing one another will soon be our own demise in a anarchists dream of erasing all in genocide.

Little Jack Horner said
To hell with this corner
And had a stroll outside

He saw his neighbor Humpty
And climbed up the wall
Not to say hi, but create a fall

Humpty said what's up guy
Horner said I'm sick of pie
Humpty saw the look in Horners eye
Oh my, oh my, please Jack I am no pie

With one push during Humptys babble
Off of the wall,
Now Jacks eggs are scrambled.

Give to me your knowledge
As I sit crossed legged
In the summers sun.

My palms are open
My mind cleansed free
Feel my love for you
Through my energy

Please help me heal through the pain
Cleanse my soul with your freshest rain

Help me see with your guided light
With strength in health of my mind

Mother please I beg of thee
For I am your son
And you I believe