he's still breathing and drooling all over me
the book i borrowed lies back at me with your eyes
and i can't even read it through for fear of reading my own demise
the songs we've sung all just say your name now
i'm in a white room and it's full of you to the brim
i hate it
i'm in paris and we have never been and yet you haunt me and yet you're here
i am insane and i am alone and still you are behind me whispering
things you've said over and over
things ive only imagined but i know you've thought
in mauregard by night you float across the ceiling
the emptiness of obsession is all im feeling

You're like ripples of heat cutting through the atmosphere
My desperate depression inducing guilty pleasure
The words make it sound so heavy but it really is as effortless as breath
In and out
You're the feeling of bad tires on a slippery road
The exhalation of a close encounter
A statuesque vision of false hope and love and a queasy stomach
I want to devour your mouth with my mouth
You make my eyes hazy with lustful thoughts
It's an addiction to temptation
You're perfection at 4AM forever on my mind
We are just two beautiful terrible creatures
Aching for freedom and each other and that's all that will ever matter

Her heart is violent and true
Her teeth are always showing
A grimace or a smile
Three cheers to never knowing
Her soul is violet and blue
Her dependency is growing
Another word is penned from bile
The palest moon is glowing
Her body is strung out over you
Her blood is overflowing

I am worth more than the power of a thousand gleaming suns that it takes to get your attention
I am worth loving wholly and deeply, poetically and passionately
I am worth giving the beautiful things in life, gold and intricacies
I am worth more than average **** and quick slamming into
I am deserving of rose petals and soft red lighting, slow motion tracing of my frame and delicate looks of consuming affection
I am deserving of all the words and sonnets and letters and limericks,
Of cherry trees planted in my honor and stars bearing my namesake
I am not the crumbling Berlin Wall or the heartbreak of war
I am not loneliness embodied or vagrants on the ***
I am royalty and compassion and organic kindness
I am the sweet and salty breeze blowing from the east and the golden blood of a sunset in the west
I am a galaxy and you are just a star
I am everything that you don't ******* deserve

you asked me long ago why every time we ******
it was 'so passionate'
today it hit me,
as i was reading tropic of cancer for the fourth time
it's because i am passion,
i am passion embodied
your other women,
they may give you something else individually,
but they are not the look in my golden eyes
as we both stand on our knees
and devour each other hungrily
they may be beauty or intelligence or a simply good ****,
but they are not passion
i realized that it is not the **** that you crave,
but the characteristics that you lack, you take from us
you need my passion to stay sane and whole
i gave it freely because it is all of me
i have an endless, abundance of passion
a depthless well of fieriness
you pay me in faux love and deep friendship for the dedicated doses
of passion that i put into your soul
your words stick to me because they are my words
i gave them to you with each passionate ****
and you spit them back in just the way i loved
the more i ponder our coup the more i realize
the ******* was for me to unload the heavy burden passion brings
you needed it to fill you and i have a surplus
as each day ends i find more clarity
you are a hollow vessel and your women give you your character
they are all loved and unloved by you
they all give you what you need to feel human
but i must start rationing my passion
i need it for my writings
i need it for my living
i need it for my sanity
perhaps to hone it so that at a simple touch i can ignite sparks
in every beggar, aristocrat, country-man
rather than to fill up your empty chest where love is not welcome