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 Sep 2013 Erica M
Kimberly Gedeon
I made some soup.
But it’s not for you.
It’s for me.
I don’t want you to change it.
It’s my soup.
Some people want to add some basil or maybe a little oregano.
But it’s my soup.
Some people think it’s too salty.
One person thought it’s too sweet.
But I told ‘em
f--k you.
I won’t change a thing.
It’s my soup.
Someone even tried to stir the ***
I grabbed the ladle
and bopped him on the head
I told him it was my soup.
Someone told me to turn up the heat
For what reason?
It’s a perfect temperature.
Someone else told me to turn down the heat.
I told him that would make it too cold.
It’s my soup.
Someone even told me I had to take some ingredients out.
But I love it the way it is.
It’s my soup.
Someone even tried to take a sip
The nerve!
It’s my soup.
Make your own.
Someone said I overcooked it.
I told her to leave me alone.
I like the smokey flavor.
To my horror, someone even tried to throw it out.
I grabbed the *** and put it back on the stove
Where it belongs.
This is my soup.
This soup…
**is my life.
I think we've all had the experience of people trying to change the way we are or the way we live our lives because it makes them uncomfortable. It's time you to take back your soup and make it yours.
 Sep 2013 Erica M
Jimmy King
My mom welcomes me in from the cold fall air
With a plate of home-made french toast-
Maple syrup pouring like the lies I tell her;
Powdered sugar, the dots of truth I work in
When it's convenient to do so

The smell of *****, spilled
On that place on my jeans beneath which
I have tattooed every moment spent without her,
Is masked by the batter of a sleep-deprived morning
When all I want to do is go to my mom
With all the problems she doesn't even know I have

Over that breakfast of laughs and warm family smiles,
And over a warm cup of tea to get me passed my hangover,
She asks me all about my night that didn't happen
And I continue to paint for her
The lie I don't even really remember first telling.
There's this feeling I get from time to time
where I miss you so so much.
I long for a hug, I long for your touch.
I long for nothing more than to see you smile,
to sit and admire the colour of your eyes.
To admire all you are and all you will be.
To be with someone who really loves me.

I hate when I cry and wish you were with me.
To hold me and tell me everything will be okay.
When you tell me in a message, it just isn't the same.
The longing is still there and so is the pain.
I hate when I am in need of a hug,
from you.
When I imagine the things we could do,
if only you were with me or if I was with you.

That feeling I get from time to time.
It hurts enough to make me cry.
And the longing will last until tomorrow.
And it turns all my pain into sorrow.

It's hard to explain and it has no name,
but this feeling, it drives me insane.
And it causes an unbearable amount of pain.
A longing is all, to be close to you.
I try to live with it but it's too hard to do.

It crushes me and kills my spirit inside.
All this because of a feeling I feel from time to time.
 Jul 2013 Erica M
Deborah Lin
You think you have to carry the past
like a sack of rocks weighing on your spine.
I’m here to tell you that you don’t.
Let me take them out,
one by one,
let them fall to the ground,
one by one,
and help you let
it
go.
And when you’re ready,
I’ll skip them across lakes and ponds with you
and watch them sink to the bottom,
where they belong.

You think you have to bruise yourself with hatred and sorrow
like a champion prizefighter.
I’m here to tell you that you don’t.
Put down your fists
and let the adrenaline
dissipate in your bloodstream.
Take a deep breath in, and let
it
out.
Learn to love yourself.
There’s no need to fight that any longer.

You think you have to always stand tall
like an impenetrable fortress.
I’m here to tell you that you don’t.
My darling, it is okay to let
me
in.
And it is okay to crumble a little bit.
Let ivy grow up your sides, if only
to remind you that life
is still possible within your hands.
And when you finally fall, I hope you realize
that you never were just a stronghold.
You are the sky,
the unreachable horizon,
and every beautiful thing in between.
 Jul 2013 Erica M
Deborah Lin
There are some things that
I’ll never understand
like why I engraved “F A D E”
into my upper left forearm
and trace over the uneven markings
a little too fondly sometimes.
I didn’t mean for it to be funny,
and I didn’t mean for it
to actually mean something
But it did.
Because scars don’t always fade,
and I wanted the ones left on my heart to
and I wanted the ones left on my arms to
remind me —
that life will hurt you
but life will heal you
and when it does —
Let it.
Let it.
Let it.
 Jul 2013 Erica M
Deborah Lin
Let me*
i. run my fingers over your
        life-hardened calluses
ii. trace the ridges and creases
        of each joint on the terrain
iii. climb the peaks of
        all your knuckles
        (and scream when i get to the top)
iv. read your palms like a map,
        a timeline,
        and everything in between
v. follow the bumpy paths
        of your veins to a
        bright and beautiful place.
I'm sitting, staring at this clock like a hawk.
Counting the seconds, minutes, hours, till we talk.
And while I wait, my heart breaks and I begin to shake, full of hate
towards myself and I scream for help,
but no one hears or sees my tears.

When I'm all alone and I need you most,
I'm banished to my room, with nothing to do.
Oh how I want to defy, my mother tonight, for making me say goodbye, with no reason why.
I get send to bed, I'm as good as dead
Cause without you, I am doomed.
I'll drown in my thoughts, and just stare at the clock,
I hear it tick and tock, I hear it mock,
me. Cause I'm stuck in my bed, lost in my head.

It's not  a want but a need, the air that I breathe,
if only others could see, that it is necessary,
for me to talk to you.
You're my guide when I'm lost, you block out my bad thoughts,
and you make my day, with the things you say.

Is it only me?
Can only I see?
That talking to you is a need,
*a life necessity.
 Jul 2013 Erica M
Deborah Lin
I am a lighthouse
       or so I’ve been told
where few ships have sailed
in to find guidance.

I have been waiting
for a vessel to see my light
for a captain to come to shore
for the tides to wash up
        something more than
        a seashell
        a jellyfish
        an empty bottle
                with love letters drenched
                in tears and seawater
                (I couldn’t tell the difference)

I am a lighthouse
Please remember me
in the storm
and on cloudless nights
       when all the stars are
       irresistible in their glory
Remember me
as the place you come home to
Where you can let yourself in
(feel free to put your feet up)
and lay your head back
and let out a sigh that won’t
        be whipped away by ocean-saturated air

I am a lighthouse
in the middle of nowhere
Ships have wrecked themselves
on broken boulders that line my body
like a jealous widow, like a marked territory
Few have made it through.
None have ever stayed.
But my lamp is still burning
and my tower stands tall
and I will guide your journey,
        even if it means pointing over there
        when all I want is for you to stay here.
With every passing second, minute, hour, day
my happiness keeps slipping away.
Further and further into a hole.
I fall deeper and deeper with nothing to hold.

A rope is thrown in hopes to save,
the falling girl, but there is no escape.
For she missed the rope, it was out of reach.
Yet this rescuer hasn't given up on me.

Why would you stay to help the helpless?
Why are you trying to find a bottom to this bottomless pit?
So many questions that will have no answer.
Who is this angel, my rescuer?

Why spend your time on someone like me?
What do you see that is so lovely?
What makes you think I'm a person worth saving?
My rescuer, this angel, she's my safe haven.

Maybe it's not me, maybe it's you.
This can just be something you do.
You like to help others, you have a good heart.
You help me because that's the type of person you are.

But what if I'm special and important to you.
Yes you help others, that is what you do.
But maybe you'd choose to help me over somebody else.
Maybe you really want to see me well.
While you may care about others, you also care about me.
Maybe you help cause you love me.

She is finally back with a longer rope this time.
I could surely reach it with a small climb.
But my mind is telling me I don't deserve this help.
That her time would be better spent on someone else.
I don't think it's true, it just can't be.
I didn't ask for help, it was offered to me.
Why would it be offered, if she didn't care?
There are enough nice people in this world to share.

So I jump up and reach for the rope.
And as I grab hold of it, I also grab hope.
Hope for a better life, a happier one.
I was losing this battle, but in the end I won.
I won with some help, and that is okay.
Because at the end of the day, I feel great.
And now that I'm safe and happy again,
I can go thank my new friend.
Who made me smile in the midst of my tears.
And helped me overcome some of my fears.
She literally turned my frown upside down.
She had the power to turn this poem around.

Not only did I gain a friend, but an important lesson too.
I hope if you are lonely this will help you.
Darkness is only there to help out the light.
After all, the brightest stars shine during the darkest night.

— The End —