There's a sharp object in my heart
And its not coming out
Damaging my brain as it hurts
Physically

Mentally *******
Making me wonder
How did I survive
Till these days
To discover such mishap

And how it is possible to
Have come this far
Not knowing
Such suicide object
Could have been placed inside my heart

Probably have slit
Causing great
Internal bleeding

Causing blood clog
And all sorts
To this damage, hurting with uneasy

How will I survive?

There is one moon
On this earth
Which I look at
Most of my night

Since I was a little girl

It always seems so beautiful
And mysterious

Something to be discovered
Whenever I look at it

Always seems unreachable
Even when it came to stay so near

Close to my heart
As I reach out to discover
The darkness wrap me
And I lost sigh of where
The moon was last at

I stayed up every night
Looking at constellation of stars
But I see no moon

And it dishearten me
As it seems I have slipped away
S
    l
       o
          w
               l
                  y

Without meeting the moon
which I've seen since I was a girl

Each day seems to fade
Each moment slips away
Your voice I struggle to hear
This love I seem to fear

Why not you and me
Tell me why can't you see
I've always loved with all my heart
You've always wanted us to part

Please tell me why I live in hell
Why it's dark and cold like a dripping well
I don't understand the things I do wrong
That I've hurt you all along

Love is in all love is free
But love is one thing not in me
So don't try to help or make me see
I have no love and that's how it'll be

And at times it all hits me at once
Like a ton of bricks crashing into my body
stealing all of my breath until i’m able to stand
knocking me off of my feet
forcing me to remember every detail
from your alluring eyes
to your selfish and devious ways
i told myself it was worth it everytime
worth all the pain and suffering
worth all the tears and screaming
and sleepless lonely nights
just to have your hand back in mine again
and i believed it
i believed every word that you said to me
you told me you loved me
you made me feel as if i was the only one
you would ever need
i felt as if for a moment
i had found everything i had ever needed
but time is an enemy
i sit and watch the clock tick
hiding in the shadows of your destructive ways
waiting for another crash
the audacity you have
to continuouly steal every ounce of happiness i have
i’ve done nothing but love you
and in return i’ve only gotten heartache and pain
the insanity you have created in my mind
has led me on a destructive path
a path with no light at the end
i stay up at night with tears pouring down my face
unable to hide the scars you've created
days turn into weeks
weeks turn into months
and months will soon turn into years
and I know i will still hopelessly
be in love with you.

I’m drunk, and only getting drunker
Like the days ahead are only getting darker
Please don’t let the lights go out

If you see this, I am speaking to you
Directly to YOU
Yes YOU!
I want you to know I forgive you
I want to forgive myself
But I never do
I love you
More than I love me
And some days I wish I never met you
That I could reach into my brain
And pull the strands of you out
So many bits of memory
And then forget you

Look at me
I am a mess
I am anxiety
I am the unfolded clothing shoved in drawers
I am the dust you can’t reach on the ceilings of your mind
I am the galaxy born from the disastrous explosions in your eyes
I am the first love
I am the park bench you last saw me on
I am an embrace after twenty years gone by
I am the funeral that buries all emotion
I am what keeps you from being okay

Play it
Play the song
Hear it
Ringing
Bit by bit
In your ear
In your heart
Beating
Humming
Singing

When out of a clear sky, the bright

Sky over Japan, they tumbled the

death of light,

For a moment, it's said, there was

brilliance sword-sharp,

A dazzle of white, and then dark.

Into the cavernous blackness, as

home to hell,

Agonies crowded; and high above

in the swell

Of the gentle tide of the sky, lucid

and fair,

Men floated serenely as angels

disporting there.