When I was young
I promised myself
To never turn into the monsters
I saw on the glowing screen

But years pass by
And the promises we've
Made ourselves fade away
And we roll around in our broken dreams

We bathe in sadness
In guilt and shame
We swallow lies society feeds us
How we should behave

Perfect lips and ribs poking
A thigh gap and straight teeth
Tall and lean
Tan with no blemishes

These are the ingredients
For a perfect body to fit
Right into society
And to be happy

The promises had
Nearly slipped through the
Cracks in this fragile thing
We've named 'life'

I've forgotten my own
Oaths I've made
I'm sorry younger me
You would be proud

When I was younger
If I was shown what my future would be
Maybe I would have tried to change
Or slit my wrists to prevent the inevitable

But this is my life now
This is what I've become
I don't like what I see
I'm not having any fun

Your words sting like alcohol on a fresh cut
Leaving me in shock and unable to move.
You throw another insult my way, which I try to brush off but,
They keep coming so I don't know what to do.

I try to ignore you, shut down my mind
I'll try to pretend it's a joke this time.
But I can't do it, I just want to cry
When I try to tell you it hurts, it sounds like a whine.

So I'll bottle up my feelings and just cry in bed
I won't let you see me hurt.
When I'm going to sleep I'll clear out my head
You won't see the tears on my shirt.

My own blood, you are family
Yet you treat me like dirt.
You mean everything to me
And you cause so much hurt.

So I'm done, I can't do this no more
You ***** me over and I just forgive you.
No, we are done, let me show you the door
If I'll let this continue I don't know what I'll do.

You'll still be my sister, but I'll love you less
I hope in turn the pain decreases.
I can't disown you, but I can fix this mess
In hope my nightly cry ceases.

You don't know how much pain you cause and you never will
It will just be my little secret.
Those little things you say, you won't how they ****
How you broke my heart in pieces.

Stop cutting.

I get it, life hurts.

You want to feel, something.

You would rather watch your own blood seep out of your body from a self inflicted wound, than experience the hurt you have inside.

I get it. Stop cutting.

You choose to hurt yourself because you are overwhelmed by the pain you have caused another person, even if it was unintentional. The thought of that person whom you have such strong feelings for, suffering because of your actions or in-actions, is almost unbearable.

I get it. Stop cutting.

You don't know what to make of your situation. You don't know how a person like you could end up in such a ****** up scene. You feel stuck, lost.

I get it. I do.
Stop cutting.

Your parents ****. They don't understand the kind of **** you are going through. Sure they were kids once but that was different. Things were different back then. They don't get you and they probably never will. They don't care.

I get it. Stop cutting.

You really want to hurt yourself because you get off on the pain. You want it. You need it. You deserve it. You were put on this earth to suffer and you accept your role as martyr.

I get it. Truly, I do.
Stop cutting.

You need some sort of release. Something, anything. Anything but the consuming black,
nothing. The sweet release that only a razor can provide is the only thing that seems real to you amidst all of the drama.

I get it.
Stop cutting.



There is chaos in your life and the secret solitude provided by your ritual seems like an oasis.

I get it. Stop cutting.

You like the way your skin splits open.  You like the way you can touch the cuts underneath your clothes. You like the way the scars remind you.

I get it.
Stop cutting.

The love of your life has abandoned you, leaving a void that nobody will ever fill. Ever.
You are completely and utterly alone.

Life *****.

I get it.

You however, are beautiful,
inside and out,
scars and everything,
and you are not as alone as you think.


Please,
Please,
Please,
Stop cutting.