So now I go free from star-crossed crucifixion

A broken heart like broken bones leaves me frail

Woe to be crippled by lost loves malediction

This torturous pain I try to belie to no avail

As if into my chest swords were so cruelly cast

A crown of thorns bound tightly round my head

My truest heart beats desperate to outlast

The purging of loves poison that I had fed

But I feel like this sorrow is swiftly killing me

Like I'm being pulled and torn from within

By Nightmares born from my sweet reverie

And devils oh so eager to punish my sin

My dreams have been deferred one too many times
I'm beginning to wonder if those dreams were mine
Dried up like a raisin in the sun
A festering wound starting to run

My dreams have been deffered
By the nightmares I preffered
Over the reality
Of human suffering

My dreams have been deferred one too many times
I'm beginning to wonder if those dreams were mine
They stink like rotting meat
Rot and sugar over bittersweet

My dreams have been deffered
By the nightmares I preffered
Over the hypocracies
Of human niceties

My dreams have been deferred one too many times
I'm beginning to wonder if those dreams were mine
They're a sagging heavy load
That I fear may explode

My dreams have been deffered
By the nightmares I preffered
Over the insanity
Of human society

My dreams have been deferred one too many times
I'm beginning to wonder if those dreams were mine

She sits in darkness dancing with death
A death in her family and a friend last breath

She is afraid of being alone with her thoughts
Thoughts of suicide is all lonliness brought

She is told that she is beautiful by men
Then comes home to a family who contradicts them

She feels hated by her brother and even her mother
A mother who treats her like **** unlike any other

This is the life she's excepted she calls it luck
Bad luck gave her a world where no one gives a ****

She believes her life can't change sufficiently
But I think one day she may see differently

There may be hope when she talks about dreams
Maybe her future isn't as bleak as it seems

I know this script may end in tragedy

Yet still I play the role that Eros casts

Following the fragments of future and past

Drawn forth by your entrancing melody

I know you come forth on winds of Chaos

Yet still I desire to dance in your storm

Until our fickle hearts in disdain betray us

For a moment let me know your form

I know you can't be mine and mine alone

Yet still this feeling swirls and swells

So be mine for moments carved in stone

Moments for which my soul would gladly endure hell

I'm a perfect cocktail of disgrace
A destiny of betrayal is in my face
And in my blood it's like a tapestry
A bloodline binding my family tree
I carve the mark of Cain in my skin
In a vain attempt to drain away sin
Praying I don't break and tear a vein
Though maybe I would break the chain
Freeing generations of broken souls
Spilling my blood may pay our toll
Or will my disease simply transcend
Spread like a virus to family and friends

Do I really look like that man
I want to be a better image
But I am unsure that I can
Can I defy my lineage
Fathers leaving sons alone
Saying I love you son
Am I him in a lighter tone
Can I ever love anyone
Does my blood bind my chain
Does my reflection make me
Is his flesh my mark of Cain
His reflections all I see

She was only a ten year old
Suffering as the cancer took hold
It started to show when she was nine
At the time she still managed to shine
Even though her eye was now lazy
It never bothered the little lady
Her headaches never went away
As she lost her childhood every passing day
She was only ten years old
She lay there as her body turned cold
A summer spent trapped in a bed
In a body where hell was her own head
I think I killed her with my last words
What I whispered was the last she heard
Before she inhaled deeply and started to go
The rattles began and her pulse started to slow
I whispered "I love you; it's okay if you go"
With her birthday approaching someone had to know

I come to you without pretenses or expectation

My truest feelings displayed unbelied

On my sleeve my truest heart I wear emblazoned

Without posture or playfulness or petty pride

What so entangles my mind when you are near

Like a crown of flowers or thorns wound round my head

Dispelling thought clouding reason subduing fear

Enchanted I wander to follow loves sanguine thread

Marching toward my star crossed crucifixion

Of which I shall gladly endure endless hours

For I seek no cure to remedy this sweet affliction

And with joyous praise fall to your powers

I eat unendingly some days
Gorging myself on sweets
Swallowing down meats
Yet the hole never goes away

I stand before a looking glass
Revolted by my bulging flesh

I forget to eat some days
Ignoring the pangs of hunger
Until I can take it no longer
Yet the hole decides to stay

I stand before a looking glass
Hoping to love my ugly flesh

I eat unendingly some days
Sickened by my pig like body
Disgusted by my ******* gluttony
Yet the hole eats away

Sealed within the metal vessel
Is the beating blood of ancient Devils
Pressing against the fleshy womb
Scratching upon their boneyard tomb

Free us from this prison cell
All the secrets we can tell
Who you are where you belong
Just drag the cold steel key along
The door opens their forms revealed
Crimson Devils names concealed
They shackle the wrists with chains
Torment the vessel with searing pains

One whispers words of doubt
Two draws the life out
Three pukes evil in vessels eyes
Four waits for vessel to die
A painful Death awaits
As the vessel cracks beneath the weight
Broken and beaten it crumbles

I know you're not ready to give the love I ask

So just hold me steady and let these moments last

Where you are my friend, my hope, my dream

The one to send when fear is pulling at my seams

And I'll do my best and I'll hold my love

Close to my chest and make it enough

Until you can share the same love as me

Just be right there and I'll believe

That if that day can never happen

I'll be okay as long as you're my friend

How I dream to be drunk on your kiss

To be enraptured by dionysian bliss

Free to proceed with unbound desire

To let every touch fill with voracious fire

Stolen from gods and placed in hands

Burning to know your sacred lands

To hear your heart beating in your chest

To feel your lungs fill with bated breath

Your mind your body your soul unveiled

Along with the banes and blessings entailed

Yet for all my wanting I'm filled with fear

If my wish comes to true you'll disappear

Wouldn't it be sublime if we could fly
If the world were mine we'd soar 'til we die
Like fairies we'd fly swift as the shadows
Going anywhere that the wind does blow
The fragrance of the fields below give way
Among flowers we the lost ones do lay
Through the forest we the dreamers bring light
Then like phantoms we run into the night
Our scars are no longer there when we dream
We are happy when we dance in Alfheim

Feet scorched by the raging flame
The pain tells her she's to blame
To her day and night are the same
When shadows call her name
But she'll keeps dancing on hot coals
Until the hellfire swallows her whole
When the darkness consumes her soul
She'll gain back the repose they stole
Dancing across her skin the fire sings
Of magic and otherworldly things
And she welcomes what it brings
Dancing with the fires sweet sting
The fire raises to the dark sky
With it she and her dreams fly
Then she utters in a joyful sigh
Goodbye

I am not one of them nor will I ever be.
That is the truth.
I am a loser; worthless
Are things I am not.
Popular and hot
Are words that spell me.
Weak and ugly
I scorn them.
Beautiful people
Like me are uncommon.
Ugly losers
I am beautiful.
I hate lies like
I'm a *******.
They tell me
I am not one of them nor will I ever be.

Elohim have you forgotten the prayers of your people
Avinu what happened to those praying under your steeple
El Shaddai did you leave them to hang from the rope
Adonai did you care that the bullets their only hope
If you're almighty give them the strength to stand
If you're all knowing see their pain and lend a hand
Is saving a life stealing free will in the eyes of the lord
Can you not speak as you did to Moses and lend kind words

Automatons grind and roar
Miasma's drive us to the floor
Enslaved by the kings guilty crown
Ritual sacrifice to keep us down
Insidious engines spewing smoke
Clawing at our burning throats
As the people lose their hold

Television leaves us dumb and idle
Hail the mechanical gods and idols
Everybody bow to the iron cold

Give up freedom and you'll be fed
Refuse and they'll paint you red
Eat up their poison and their lies
Accept their disguise and evil eyes
Take in the eagle your soul is sold

Aphrodite have I done you so wrong

That you enamore me in loves somber song

Yet leave his holy heart unignited

Cursing me with burning affection unrequited

Why allow me to be denied Anteros

And Eros strike me so cruelly with arrows

That I must make Philia to be enough

When what I desire fervently is his fleeting love

I see now goddess that I you must truly despise

For you sent forth Phobos and Deimos to terrorize

Until I found my heart to be ragged and maimed

Still for their sake I find myself acting as if it's the same

I spend days at a time trying to forget I was his second choice

I hate the way he worships Seth with such admiration in his voice

A ******* paragon an idol to him an affection I could never attain

No matter how hard I try to be equal in his eyes it’s all in vain

I love this man more than any other that’s walked into my life

Being reminded I’ll always be second best just twists the knife

The way he said “When we go to visit him don’t be mad at me”

Filled me with rage and pain what else does he expect me to be

A man who couldn’t love him back will always mean more to him

Than the man who would sacrifice his heart, his life, his limbs

I tried to talk to you to ask you why
To find why you told me goodbye
Why am I so stupid and useless
Why can't I be more selfless

Will I ever know why we died
Will you ever tell me you tried
Or that is was me that I failed
Just tell me this ship has sailed

Did you mean it do you hate me
Or is there something I don't see
Am I really that imperfect to you
I would try and fix it if only I knew

So I could stop crying in my room
Praying roses don't start to bloom
Fed by tears rolling down my cheeks
Did you hate because I was weak?

The soul speaks only in whispers now
As it passes through the veil
Stay beyond the reach of death somehow
On your journey to prevail

To the cradle of Morpheus
The keeper of your dreams
Much like the journey of Orpheus
You traverse Hades streams

The soul creeps slowly through the gates
As it enters the world below
Stay beyond the eye of the all seeing fates
If back home you hope to go

To the cradle of Morpheus
The keeper of lost things
Much like the journey of Orpheus
Who played upon his strings

The soul silently to the cradle does sneak
As it peers at the sleeper within
Beyond the reach of the living world is what you seek
Climb in the cradle of Sleep and his twin

In the cradle of Morpheus
The keeper and his twin
Much like the story of Orpheus
You may not win

The soul climbs in and is filled with fear
As it hears that silent breath
Beyond the veil these twins draw near
In the cradle you will find Sleep and his brother Death

In the cradle of Morpheus
The keeper of lost life
Much like the story Orpheus
The man who lost his wife

It's getting so hard to see through the haze
Distorting their faces until I avert my gaze
It wraps itself around the mind I call home
Enchanting my eyes to seeing only monochrome
It sits on my chest to eat my dreams at night
So I force my eyes open until they see light
Reserving sleep for the safety of the day
Waking to find I'm wasting my life away

Help me 'cause I can't move on without your okay
Your body soul and heart is mine isn't that what you'd say
I remember when I wasn't met with uncaring eyes
When I never had a reason to break and cry
Maybe I still don't maybe I'm just unstable
But I've tried to get over it I'm just unable
Is it attention seeking if I keep it inside
If all I do is lock it up and make it hide
All I need to know is why do you hate me
Was it something you hid to no can't be
Maybe just maybe I'll know for sure
Maybe I should knock on his door

Today I slept through the rain
And in my dreams lost the pain
I said the words I needed to
And I got to hold and kiss you
But alas when I awoke it was gone
from the lake of sorrow was drawn
Waters filled with potent venom
To make true smiles evermore seldom
Tonight I'll lie awake with our sketchbook
And I'll draw back the repose you took

I was once told God loves everyone
So why do I see so many wanting to die
Why doesn't God here them as they cry
When all they really need is someone

I don't want to see them fight themselves
Nor do I want to see their world crash down
I don't want to watch a friend start to drown
Because they feel like a doll left on the shelf

I don't want to put faith in Gods hands
When he might come a little to late
Because they were left with only hate
And were so hungry they couldn't stand

I don't want to watch someone die
Because they think they're fat
Why won't God fix that
No point asking why

Long ago he told me blood was the currency of souls
In those illuminated moments I was whole
As if under baptism I was bathed in flames
And over my soul a transfiguration came
As our blood on paper rose with the smoke
A bond of blood once a contract now a joke
As he keeps walking with a holy grace
I wallow in my self pity wholly a disgrace
As I realize after so many years they were only gestures
Every touch every kiss every word said by the Jester

We build these walls up around us
Reset as we fall into the dust
In this game we keep running away

Run from the monster behind you
Wrong turn and it finally finds you
There is no more running on this way

In this labyrinth of these lost hearts
Thin as fabric we lose our parts
Reaching for a castle in the sky

Dreaming of cerulean skies
Wishing like a fairy I could fly
Reaching for that castle 'til I die

I feel like dying wouldn't suffice
As every puff robs her of her life
It's not a knife but it's still suicide
Each puff like taking in cyanide
But she keeps inhaling the smoke
As her children watch her choke
Knowing if she dies they'll be alone
Seeing her depression has grown
She hides behind a drawn on smile
She is walking a thousand miles
Trying to get to were she needs
With each step she starts to bleed
Still going as gray hands hold her
And the poison stick still smolders

Where do I belong?
For my kind the lines blur
I say I'm black I'm wrong?

Then how can I be right?
For my kind it's so unsure
To the others I'm not white

All this I could easily bare
If not for the hate and slurs
I know I don't fit anywhere

Why do you carry the weight of the world in your hands
Do you think that I don’t see or I can’t  understand
Please just share the weight of the burdens inside my love

Is the crown you wear upon your head growing heavy
I often fear that it’s weight on you may be deadly
Please I beg just let go of your foolish pride my love

I know you feel like you must walk this road on your own
Don’t you see I am here you don’t have to be alone
I will always be their waiting by your side my love

I remember a dream I had not long ago
I sat with a stranger that I seemed to know
We spoke about the stars and the planets
We talked about Gods and who planned it
We questioned if we are slaves to destiny
We shared the answers of lifes mysteries
Then the darkness cracked releasing light
Our time was up, but we tried to fight
We suddenly realized we've been here before
The he said you were never afraid to die before
So I let go and fell off of the black stone
Through the light and awoke all the answers gone

We live in a world where society decides what's real
A world where you are told who you are and what you feel
If you're anorexic or you cut you're an attention *****
And they try to beat you down until you can't take anymore
Or if you get pregnant and are still a little young
They say she's probably a **** and drug addict and high strung
Not realizing that it's really not even their place
Even if it was at least have the guts to say it to someone's face
Instead of judging their live evaluate yours
Stop whispering he say and she says behind closed doors
So what if they're anorexic they're in pain
And if they cut it doesn't mean you can call them insane
Because it's not even your place to say
Shut the hell up stop acting arrogant and move out my way
You are not them you are you
You don't have a ******* clue about what they've been through

I listen to my radio and hear your voice in the songs
And I lay in my bed wondering what went wrong
On that summer so long ago
It all seemed to go so slow
I remember you touching me tasting so tantalizing
Lips pressed on my neck were we just fantasizing
Soon summer passed by
We wouldn't even meet eyes
And I remember you hating me hurting so humiliating
Words cut into my skin were we just a summer fling

Lust, Wrath, Envy, Passion
Aren't just a passing fashion
Don't try to fight your sins
Embrace the beast within

Open Pandora's box
Discover what it unlocks
Why are you afraid


Greed, Pride, Gluttony, Consuming
Break the guise you're assuming
Don't get caught on their hook
Don't be a slave to a book

Open Pandora's box
Discover what it unlocks
Come on break the chains

Sloth, ***, ******, Magik
What's life without a little havoc
Don't let them decide who you are
Sin is fun if you don't go to far

Open Pandora's box
Discover what it unlocks
Take control of your fate

There is a darkness living inside me
I thinks he's been there since I was three
He laid dormant when I was five
When I was thirteen he came alive
At first he was weak barely a noise
But soon he became an ever present voice
He started to show me I was alone
He told me this world is not my own
I was separated from the other empty shells
I was locked in my mind a personal hell
The demon began clawing at my flesh
He became a force I could hardly supress
He crashed around inside my head for days
He became a force from which I couldn't run away
When I was sixteen I began to find some reprieve
But now that I'm eighteen I see he'll never leave

God said partake only of the tree of life
For the other brings only death and strife
But how can knowledge be called as sin
I say bring death and strife let them in
For death is a worthy price for free will
I rather starve and know it then eat my fill
I refuse to follow blindly in your Lord
I would rather fall upon a rusted sword
How can one see the light in such a way
How does one like you look forward to day
Believing your soul is not in your hands
And as swiftly as you were made you are sand

There's a stone in my throat
And I fear I may choke
In this hell that you built
I am burdened by guilt

There's a beat in my heart
And I feel it may start
In this hell I've been placed
That I don't wish to face

There's a note in my hand
And you may understand
Why I don't belong here
And chose to disappear

There's a blade at my wrists
And I fear it persists
To beckon my soul home
But I would be alone

There's a voice at my door
And I sob on the floor
As the blade falls away
She whispers it's okay

There's a hero weeping
And she's the one keeping
Me reaching for heaven
As we fight depression

You left me with hate inside me
A hate I never could seem to see
The hate which you passed on
When you wished I was gone
You made me shatter the glass
A red ribbon and dark road pass
Two years and still I won't bleed
And still I feel it's what I need
A few faded scars and one strong
Oh that a cat scratch nothing's wrong
I smile but they don't believe the mask
Fade away memories that's all I ask

Fairy in the sky grant me one wish
Purge me like a sinners soul
My one last wish is this

Castle in the sky of you I dream
Reach for you to make me whole
With wings made of moon beams

Lost in a field of roses I stand
Bound in black bitter rose vines
Reaching with sanguine hands

No more magic left within me
I can never make you mine
To blind for me to see

I feel so helpless and weak
Taking words that they speak
I just smile saying I don't care
While I wish they weren't there
So I could let my guard down
Letting my confidence drown
It's not as bad as it seems
I've just lost my self-esteem
I wear a smile to hide it
I honestly feel like ****
I want to be strong like you
I want my smiles to be true

We call her under full moons light
The blessed beast of the night
We dance around the blazing flame
Call the blessed goddesses name
She comes cloaked in white wolfskin
The Lunar goddess of our Coven
We are drawn into her mystic trance
She joins us in our wild dance
Through the night we twist and turn
Our souls reach for the life we yearn