Stress
A cat is strong & proper
just look at its legs
long and strong
fast and enduring
even when at rest they are readied

yet the cat was not built to be perfect
most cats would like to eat
properly
(trust me on this
I've interviewed enough of them)
with a knife and fork
but they just can't seem to get a grip
on those utensils,
even with fine claws
it just won't happen
no matter how hard the try

so when they get
FRUSTRATED
and claw the crap out of the furniture
try to understand that
they are a stressed species
and need special understanding

and another can of tuna

Painted in tempera on illustration board
Don't know things by heart
They will only break you
Use your mind instead
How as a teen I wanted to die
But could not remember why
And the junkieing of america
Crack baby penquins walking on thin ice
A child being beaten on a bus
The driver runs then, drives away, does nothing
How do you spell deedy

Painted in brown acrylic
over pencil on wood paneling
She's the queen of visa
Knows all the tricks with cards
She said " I like to swim in the rain"
Alligators laughing, like on that Sendak drawing
"Yea" I say "I like the art in" and it was still hot
Dogfights for doughnuts just to shake a stick
The most out of place person I ever met
Was that surfer dude in Michegan
And when I stopped the chair cough
Then maybe I did do the world a favor
And the judge said "Can you prove that
this woman ***** you when you were
a two year old?"  And that is when
The tears began to fall down every cheek
of the jury.

At the laundromat today
I witnessed a little girl
maybe two or threee
years of age strapped
into her stroller and
playing a game on her
smart phone

I thought to myself
what a spoiled little
toddler she is because
when I was her age all
we got was an egg
filled with silly putty
to play with and we
couldn't wait until
Sunday so we could
roll the silly putty over
the comics and copy the
images on to the funny clay.
silly, wasn't it? Mother would
worry that the ink from the paper
would be harmful to us but,
we didn't care.

Today's toddlers are much more
smarter than we were, heck when
you think about it, their phones
are smarter than we used to be

much more dangerous too.
all they have to do is drop
that thing and lookout! Now
it's leaking radiation. Hey moms,
how do you like having a phone
so smart now?

I remember days of struggle
eking by by working my ***
off in some fact'ry and going
ten more bucks in debt every
month before the oilmen
declared war on humanity
and the white MAN could not
take this **** Any more so he
quit and 50 million illegals
that were here against the law
were given citizen-ships and
allowed to stay because they
wanted to work (for less than
anyone else would)

as we were all tricked into
supporting our enemies in war

by the american media because
they were told to do so

such nice t.v. scumb-bags
always doing what they are told

When I was a kid
I don't rem-ember exactly when
5, maybe 6, or seven
my mother was such a *******
she'd tell me to "go get the belt"

and I, like a dolt,
would go the the closet
in my room
grab a nice one
and return to her with it

Where she would
repeatedly strike me with it
this would go on for a period
of about four years

Until one day an old man
entered my room and witted
"Hey Kid! next time she asks
you to "go get the belt"
Go HIDE!

Unless you want to be beaten again
for being a go-get-'er"

PECAN SAM

There were sixty-five
valentines for you
I colored the one from me
your favorite blue
I didn't know
the whole world loves you too
with sixty-four adversaries
I guess we could be through

So did they all say
"I Love You"
or "be mine today
& every day
I want to be your valentine
Be Mine"

or did they say that "I
only want to love you"
and after twenty solid years
could it really be we're through

There were sixty-five
valentines for you
I colored the one from me
your favorite blue

I was having a conversation with the Gerber baby the other day. You know, the one on the jars. Interestingly enough, he simply would not stop giggling. You know and here I am trying to get an answer out of him. But, he would not budge. "What's so funny, baby?" I inquired. {giggles, giggling and more giggles.} Well! What is it? He's not talking. Maybe it has something to do with the peas and carrots or the applesauce. I just could not understand his incoherent dribbling. I guess the joke is on me. I just hope he doesn't make me wear any of it. Oh boy! is he a happy camper.

You can get away with cheating and still become a champion.

Remember when we were gasses
floating in our space?

Till we mixed together
creating the human race.

The other day they showed on the news a tweet by President Elect Donald J. Trump. It is a very sad situation when you have an illiterate as your newly appointed leader. It's like I told Layne Marie. It only gets it, when it is and never gets it when in possession. I know what you're thinking. This poet did the same thing when he posted poems on other sites. Yes. Guilty as charged. But, Trump didn't pay Mike Tyson to beat up you. And whenever I recover from those beatings I just might get up the nerve to do something about it. DO NOT TELL ME that this country is so ******* up that anyone running for president shouldn't have to take a literacy test. So we have now a mobster that is ignorant of the rules of grammar, leading the way. This is a very sad day. The 14th will be an even Saturday.

If you're a lady
all-purpose handheld device
vibrate with night-lite

was watching barbie dolls on seven
and saw you once again
Your neck now wrinkle free
Those legs wrapped around my head
Things I begin to think
Like the twinkle in your eye
That you add to blush and smile
Legs wrapped around again
Like the preacher's daughter said
Little feet near the bed
sixty-three pounds
but, very hard to carry

Watching barbie dolls on channel two
The one that squeaks and squeals
Still beats out a pig
Lady Godiva still looks great
The horry housewife stays in shape
Don't need no horse to ride on out of town

Watching barbie dolls at ten
the times; the changes
Too many blondes again
So many years
So many roads
I like the one
that lived up north
but I won't have a wallet
that size before some time again

Turning the TV back to mantle
I've had all I think that I can handle
The gold dust twins are there again
I wonder will it ever end
This could lead to stronger stuff like the old bottle

Lady Godiva never looked so good
The best provider for the push
She made me love; she understood
I love my barbie girls I watch on my TV

Had nice thoughts of Florida
'till a gator ate a man, so morbida

neatly relentless
ignored unshackled lion
wailing returning

Clouds bring darkness
To a cold day of sadness
Happiness eludes

sightless echo scolds
shakily, piously, chime
stampedes, lean arid

flaccid rigid heart
rasping harmonious bland
rude burials plead

Ode to the Beat Writers (haiku)                                                                           5.21.10
                                                                                                         by David Ehrgott



And the beat goes on
The keyboard is holy
And the beat goes on




Am Sent.                     Ode to Glare



I'm gonna hide my eyes from the sun with shades today if, that's okay.

Goodbye

Do we make compromises for
Our comforts
When we are everywhere

joylessly howling
fools exhilarate, gloating
smiling silver crag

Yellow, brown, gold, and red.
Colored leaves will soon be dead.

I have the fear that
Someday they're going to hunt me down
No real sense in leaving town
  
They all know me
or better than to jam me down
No sense changing that
  
Yeah, they know me
Too many years here
No sense in running
Too many years here
No sense in looking back

Secretary Clinton wants you
to believe that a womanizer
would make a terrible leader

She is sooooo forgetful

proud intimate cask
singing halfhearted green masks
screaming stale creamy

acid chimera
captures landlord rumbling pikes
frowning fable eats

Al Gore wants you
to believe that
Your vote counts

some people are soooo forgetful

Josh Samman
Dead at 28
American Sports
Ya just gotta love it!

delighted brute flirts
diamond cutter rising ice
gloating elks haunt sick

hardening gelding
rains smug sharp toadstools rumbling
catfish fluttering

panorama spits
daintily, hard puddles howl
peacefully sluggish

Thirty-five years to find the fifty
Thirty-five years to find just fifty
Thirty-five years to find those fifty
What did our government due
  
Thirty-five years to find the fifty
Do the math, it's just plain silly
Thirty-five years to find the fifty
Give the government it's due
  
You can't feel anymore.  Safer?
You can't feel anymore.  Safer?
You can't feel anymore.  Safer?
When government gets us *******
  
They need a lot more time now
They need a lot more time now
Three point seven million years
To catch the other bad guys
  
They sit in their disguises
In a robe on courtroom benches
With their lawyer cladded henchmen
They sit in their disguises
  
Can you call up the police now?
Can you call up the police now?
The Chief is sitting quietly
Protecting family ties
  
Anybody out there?  Save us!
Anybody out there?  Save us!
Save our country, save our babies
Give us mob free lives
  
Forty-seven years of mobster torment
Forty-seven years of mobster torment
Fifty years I've no enjoyment
I may as well just die

Love only in love don't love in hatred
or for sport as if it were a game to play

Love only in love it is not a contest
love is not something you win
it is something to have something to hold

Love only in love
It is not something to purchase/something to own
It is yours only when you give it away

Love only in love, do not waste it
Don't throw it away or toss it to demons
(Those that attempt to control)

Love only in love and you will then know only love

Bunny, Bunny, Bunny
Please me mine.  Bunny,
Bunny, Bunny Valentine.

free pigeon frets some
exaltation roaming loud
eagle chirps charcoal

singing numbly, clear
ingenious wet priests lurk, sly
jittery sharp prince

Underdog was a pill popper.

Last night at the RNC

a republican did so declare

The people of this country want

less freedom and more government

Are you sure you're not workin' fo' 'bama

exclamations clank
earnestly, gypsies capture
redly, softly, mean

Sometimes I need my **** ****** and there
is nobody there...

No one at home to please me
All I have is what's in my pocket
And that ain't much of a hand squeeze

The soap dish behaves as though
she has cancer
Her openly unfashionable drug habit
has gifted her with eleven other
life threatening illnesses
  
Tobacco has been outlawed
Finally we become a society of progress
  
Disease remains...
fittingly for a diva
  
It was a rough go for a while
but, she's better now
  
Waiting for the day, that they outlaw
high fructose corn syrup

disturbed patient fierce
redhead accelerates, mad
moist racehorses laughing

text me when driving
I am tired of living
say goodbye cruel world

handheld all-purpose
device how nice to make life
an easy delight

I confess
I have always voted Democrat
Just to rebel against my parents
So, when I voted in the Primary
The x's went straight down and
I pressed the "vote" button
That is when the ticket taker stated
"You know you voted for TRUMP, don't you?"

I didn't question it
No need to get in a toss with some volunteer
The next day they [the media] announced that
Trump had won by a landslide
It's funny though, how as soon as it looked obvious
That "the don" dumped the "dingdongaholic"
Because he became expendable

Just thought I would further inform my friends
of everything wrong with this great country
But, ain't it always the same

CROOK vs CROOK for office!

shaking dragonfly
copulates, forgiving foul
juniper lingers

Guns are innocent
The gun does not **** people
People **** people

She was smoking
At the Capitol
I saw her picture
In the telephone [booth]
Smoke was flying
In the air
You should have seen her
She was there
It was a rock show
And it was bold
Just like a rock show
At the Capitol
Smoking weasels
Rocking on
She had me teasing
She put it on
  
Rock show at the Capitol
That was where to go-go-go
Get your girl and spend your dough
There's a rock show at the Capitol
  
She was smoking
In the men's room
At the Capitol
She was btchn'
She blew my mind
Then she blew me away
  
And you wouldn't believe
They tore that building down
I can't even find that town, now!
But, believe it
There was magic in the air
I can't believe it
Seems like yesterday
You wouldn't believe it
The way they wailed away
Bouncing and shaking their bones
And they were dancing
Singing and clapping and dancing
And dancing away
  
She was steaming
I licked her ear
It was awesome
Screaming in the air
Everywhere
The gang was there
Kicking, Puffing
And banging there
She left smoking
At the Capitol