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Dec 2019 · 496
INCARCERATED TEARS
Curt A Rivard Sr Dec 2019
Separating myself from the outside world and that's my choice, as I'm penning these words, I'm listening to, my inner voice.

I'm fighting for my freedom, I'm fighting for my life, I'm fighting real hard so again I can then be with my kids, and my beautiful wife.

It's in times like these, that you feel the pain from all your falls, so no one sees my tears, I hide under my blanket and weep at night, deep within...these concrete walls.

Curt A. Rivard Sr.
2019
Dec 2019 · 337
Free to Fly
Curt A Rivard Sr Dec 2019
The song of the swallow is heard, I listen as the angel sings. Pleading for love from thee, please no more, don't cut my wings.

Words of love are written you are the author, it is your inner voice. The lessons in life you taught me, now makes my heart rejoice.

All your dreams I'll give unto you, each and everyone. You are now free to fly. Follow your heart, chase the setting sun.

If you should ever get lost along the way and later find your way back to me, it will only prove to thee... Yes, we were always meant to be.

(Curt A. Rivard Sr. 2014)
Dec 2019 · 261
Unforgettable
Curt A Rivard Sr Dec 2019
I stood there watching you as I left.  Trying hard to memorize you, knowing it would be so very important to me.
The way you looked, the way you looked.
Soon someday, I will hear your voice again and that days singing will come soon.
Man can not make a pill that would let me sleep without your memory or written erotically enough to forget about you.
These months will go by-
for all I'll remember is...
what it was, as well as, what it will be...
And that my love, you will want to see.

(Curt A. Rivard Sr. 2000)
Dec 2019 · 251
Tree of Life
Curt A Rivard Sr Dec 2019
Tonight my love, I seek out to fulfill my most passionate dream,
capturing your beauty with these words, I'm now penning this poem, for laying before my eyes, heaven has now been seen.

Thy locks of hair are finer than the finest feathers of all the flocks.

Thy eyes are diamonds that saw and found favor in thee,
my promise to you, I'll prove to you, just what you mean to me.

Thy lips are soft and taste so sweet, nothing in this world can come close to compare like when ours gently touch together and then slowly meet.

Thy ******* are well rounded and are so full of life, the love they produced sustained life, the perfect mother, my beautiful wife.

Thy hands move in such a caring way, forever will I long for there touch, each and everyday.

Thy hips have carried and brought forth fruit unto me, so deep the seed planted as were together joined as one, we will live on forever for you let me plant inside you, our very own, family tree.

Thy feet have walked side by side all along the way, never will we forget, for in all our hearts your nurturing memory will always stay.

For all that you are and for all that you have done, I just want you to know, I will always love you and you will always be... the only one.

(Curt A. Rivard Sr. 2014)

.
Apr 2017 · 918
Beatrice or Divine
Curt A Rivard Sr Apr 2017
Beatrice was the object of all his desire
Immortalized by Dante to love forever
She stole his eyes and now he walks through fire.

To see her again, he now must be clever
Overcoming obstacles along his path.              
Save me from crawling, give me wings of feather.

Nine circles this pit, I see the devil's math
Show me now, will I ever be free from here
Why this inferno, why this God burning wrath?

The sight of his love is now close, it's now near
Walking through the valley, the shadow of death
He's on a hero's journey, he has no fear.

Smitten with her beauty pure as baby's breath
He's walking all about in a flame filled haze
Remembering his vow, to love her till death.

Dragging my left hand on the wall of the maze
Can sins be forgiven, how long must I burn?
I have been on fire now for two long day's.

Tell me Lord all the things you want me to learn
Whisper to me so I will never get lost
After this quest, give her back, let her return.

So lonely, upon the flames my dreams are tossed
Shrouded in mystery she makes my heart pound
Let me, I'll care for her no matter the cost.

My hearts screaming out to her, it's screaming loud
A lifetime long ago we made a promise
From high up above she's ridding on a cloud.

Never be apart, we sealed it with a kiss
Free me from all this torment, come break the chain
Am I dreaming, how did it come to all this?

A work in progress  by Curt A. Rivard Sr.
Feb 2017 · 1.8k
The Flowers Of Evil
Curt A Rivard Sr Feb 2017
The flowers of evil are spreading and spreading,
the pollen is blinding, as the stems are dividing.
The flowers of evil are spreading and spreading,
the vines are protecting, and the thorns are injecting.
The flowers of evil are spreading and spreading,
the roots are now squealing, for they possess human feeling.
The flowers of evil are spreading and spreading,
the Genesis 30:16 is no mistake, *** was traded for mandrake.
The flowers of evil are spreading and spreading,
the magic lies in the blossom, feigning you just like an opossum.
The flowers of evil are spreading and spreading,
the cloud now has you choking, for them you had to start smoking.
The flowers of evil are spreading and spreading,
the petals are now closing, around you who's rigor frozen.
The flowers of evil are spreading and spreading,
the nectar just took your last breath, so enjoy the dance of death.

(Curt A. Rivard Sr.)
Nov 2015 · 1.3k
The Riddle of the Whirlwind
Curt A Rivard Sr Nov 2015
Doubled upon me twice and within the same week
As the cloud of death overshadowed over me
I tried to shout but could not speak.
Fleeing for my life as the debris and splinters were flying all around
In the midst of all the destruction
Great hail stones were also crashing down upon the ground.
What is my trespass? What was my sin that thou has so hotly pursued after me?
For upon my heels I felt your holy power and through the matrix, I then exited my ivory tower.
Lying in a cold sweat I'm trembling and I'm shaking
My heart is sore with great pain and is also aching.
Gazing up at the ceiling, I’m searching for the reason why
If I don't learn the interpretation soon
The next time it happens, my silver cord will be loosed and I will die.
As always in need of help I go and I take a look
Thank you Lord for giving me Samson's strength to open up, my five letter book.
For there it was right before my eyes the answer was revealed to me
It has to be the truth for the Lord tells no lies.
You’ve shown me countless visions and many marvelous wonders all along my path
If I turn my sights and away from you now I know I can expect to reap
Your whirlwind wrath.

(Curt A. Rivard Sr.)
Oct 2015 · 1.0k
Hello...I'm Dr.Frost
Curt A Rivard Sr Oct 2015
Performing autopsy's and at free will,
as I look all around, I'm very satisfied with my new thrill.

Chosen for my talents because I'm cunning with the knife, till I find the cause of all this death, in my hands, I hold, my own life.

Separated from all that I know and all that I love, all I have now is, my pet raven who follows me from high up above.

Decomposing bodies of every size and every age, to ward off the stench of death, I pack my beak with savory spices and on my hip, a bag of sage.

From the mouths of the rats the curse is told, blessing me the plague doctor with all the power I behold.

Curt A. Rivard Sr.
Apr 2015 · 1.1k
All Animals Go To Heaven
Curt A Rivard Sr Apr 2015
Have you ever loved an animal so much that it made you cry?
You fight with all your might but still you lose no matter how hard you try.
Many a year spent together, you will be missed
And yes it will take some time before I am better.
I tell myself you went off to a better place
It was a beautiful day and God gave you grace.
Forty pounds of amethyst is now your headstone
I saw the love in your eyes for they told me
I’ll be OK and I’m not alone.

4-18-15

(Curt A. Rivard Sr.)
Mar 2015 · 3.3k
Hypnotized By Shamrock Eyes
Curt A Rivard Sr Mar 2015
Set me as a seal upon thine heart, for you are mine
Never let me go, grip me tight like a vineyard vine.
I love that pretty rose that your garden did grow
Betwixt those long beautiful thighs of strength
Exposing that sea shell pink jewel, I do know.

Your garden is so unique, it’s a one of a kind
Such parts are so delicate, that the slightest touch
Produces tropical showers that fill my mind.

Flowing from your meadow, and dripping from
Those soft sensitive pink rose petals,
Golden rain drops that taste O’ so sweet.

Thy lips O my spouse, drop as the honeycomb:
Honey and milk are under my tongue:
Causing the lips of those that are asleep to speak,
Every time that they meet.

I love all of your natural beauty,
And I love every lock of your hair
Swaying from a beautiful face, worthy of my stare.

How fair and how pleasant art thou. O love, for delights!
Your calm green eyes in my trance suddenly gave me visions,
Of hypnotic pupil shamrock sights!

I love your seductive soft lips,
One kiss upon them, takes me on so many trips.
My precious 1, your body is a wonderland I cannot resist,
I need for this dream to come true
And if so, I will forever do, everything for you.

You are the Garden of Eden, brought back to life
My only thought now is, I must betroth to have you,
As my wife!

Behold, thou art fair, my love:
Behold, thou art fair; thou hast,

Shamrock Eyes!
Jan 2015 · 1.3k
A Kiss Goodnight
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2015
I just want to wake you up
and say I love you again
for wanting to know me.

I just want to wake you up
and say I love you again
for wanting to understand me.

I just want to wake you up
and say I love you again
for wanting to love me.

I just want to wake you up
and say I love you again
for chosing me.

But there you sleep
all quiet and beautiful
so I'll just sneak you a kiss goodnight
and show you just how much I do
in the mornings light.
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2015
The want to be Detective C. Auguste Dupin

got his theory all wrong

as to why that orangutang killed

Madame L'Espanaye and her daughter in the Rue Morgue.

They were killed because they were walked in on while having *** with a human by the jealous beast.

******* lowers humanity to nothing more than an animal, a beast which is unable to distinguish right from wrong, natural from unnatural, love from lust.

If you don't believe me then just ask King Kong.

As always welcome to the show!
Jan 2015 · 889
Co-Dependent
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2015
My love, your love is a drug
that I will forever crave
I always will and even in my grave.
Searching for your angel's face,
my body is now craving for you
and even from behind these concrete walls.
Sleepless nights from tossing and turning
I'm suffering through all the withdrawals.
It's in times like these,
that you feel the addiction all the most
it hurts so much, that it makes you wish that you could just die and just give up the ghost.
Life is full of stumbling blocks, snares, obstacles and O' so many traps...
Please my love, I'll give my all to you
for your love is worth the greatest relapses.
Through all the trials and all the tribulations
we are still one I do see!
The Lord helped keep us together and for it a reason,
so now lets give thanks and work on our relationship recovery.
Six new moons have came and gone
since we held each other ever ever so close
Two more to go, I can't wait,
so I can then live on,
my choice of drug,
your love.
So now when I return to you
give me a love overdose.
Jan 2015 · 872
If u Only Knew......
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2015
It is
not how
many,
it is how long with the same one who you love.
(22 years to date and still counting with the same one after being picked up hitchhiking on a way to another girls house oops..)
Jan 2015 · 884
Trembling Inside
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2015
O' no I feel them, there back again the heavy pain I feel inside my heart
when I wake up, that is when- all the shaking inside of me begins to start.
An enemy of mine who tries to win all the time never will he conquer, for I have a new plan.

Through your soothing comforting written letters I receive with all your heart felt written words. Will you keep writing, will you help me? for if not, I will surely lose this mental fight.

Overpowering what my nightmares can do I take you with me and to it, a special place daydreaming all day long and all about you.With your help I can win this insane fight till then, I tell myself, I'm not in here, I'm home with you tonight.

I hate the feelings I have all inside so no one can see me, under my prison blankets... I cry and hide:(
Jan 2015 · 1.4k
Boomerang Envelopes
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2015
They were first used by the Aborigines who lived in the outback
Made out of a hard wood, if it is thrown just right it will return, come right back.
When molded out of plastic it then takes on the shape of a playful toy
Being a witness and unto all it's magic, children in amazement are now filled with joy.
As for me, I make mine out of a three by seven inch prison commissary envelope. I throw with all my might- praying that you receive all my beautiful heart felt words that are written, that's all I hope.
Envelopes soaring high and into the heavenly sky I want you to know, no longer will they ever have to take me again away and nor no longer will you ever have to cry.
Thank you so much for filling me with your loving hope,
owe it all to you-because, you threw back to me a love filled boomerang envelope.
Jan 2015 · 946
Divine Intervention
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2015
I was in prison and protected by his loving will
as if in a trance, I visioned I was taking a test.
Studying his words so I can live out a much better life
I now see , I had to live out a predestined quest.

Reading from his book of instructions
I see I was in so many a story
(a)which is the earnest of our inheritance until the redemption, unto praise of his glory.

Day after day, minute by minute and hour hour by hour
everyday you shown me your forgiving love and I felt your Holy Power.Turning the pages for I can't help but to take a look,
I wash my hands with myrrh and every-time before I pick up your Holy Book.

Cross referencing the scriptures, the New with the Old
it's the source of my power behold, look at the energy I now hold.
Completing the circuit the electricity now begins to flow
It gives me the daily volts I need and through my faith, I now glow.

Never had I cried unto you when I found that my back was up against the wall and I know that is why I get through to you every-time, when I call. You've shown me countless signs and many marvelous wonders all along my path, if I turn my sights and away from you now, I know I can expect to feel your whirlwind wrath.

The Lord had taught me hard, but yet he taught me well and for that, this is the story to my children I will forever tell.

(a) Ephesians 1:14 KJV
Jan 2015 · 2.5k
Euphoria Established
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2015
Heed these words, write them upon the tablet of your mind for I have returned.

When you finally come to the point in your life and comprehend that the dreams with which you have been bestowed are to be used as a blueprint, you then and only then will win remarkable success in what ever calling that you adopt. You will begin to visualize things with a much greater understanding and you will experience sights stranger than you have ever seen before. You will know that these new visions are all true, for you will see that you have been given the ability to pick out and notice clusters of confirmations and on an imaginary scale. The fear of premonitions and ignoring notable occurrences by dismaying them all off as if they are just figments of your imagination is to be avoided. It is not out of random chance, the thought that things are bound to line up from time to time and for no apparent reason or that evolution had a major impact on us to evolve into begins to recognize pattern recognition, but rather, it is to be construed as if you have been blessed with the gift of foresight and you will notice that you are able to think and speak things into existence. Never again will you live with the fear of the unknown for you will know all. The truth of all things will manifest themselves and be disclosed to you in a vivid clear contrast. There will be many people who will find it extremely difficult to interpret what is being explained to them and in the process they will then start to display that they are trapped within there own gridlocked mind and be confused with just your mere presence. You will find that people who do not understand you will then try to get you to conform to what they see, ignore them. Life is but an enigma, one that is full of complex-ed riddles, when you accept to follow your dreams and with an open objective you will then have the opportunity to harness all its power and in return all the pieces of the puzzle will be spread out for you for your taking. Once you find the first piece, you then will be given the license required to take part of this phenomenon so you can complete life's grander picture found outside the ivory tower. You will know with all certainty that you are not dreaming and that what you are witnessing is not a mirage, that is until, the silver cord be loosed, after that, when death finds its way to sting and the grave can then claim its victory, welcome and accept a Re"quies'cat In Pa'ce.

As always, Welcome to the show!
Jan 2015 · 703
I'm Back!
May 2014 · 835
Open Invitation
Curt A Rivard Sr May 2014
As I slowly drift asleep and then start to close my eyes
Every night I talk to him, because he never lies.
Amazing me each and every time with his wonderful power
He shows me his true strength for I try to talk to him for about an hour.

I ask for not much, just the simple things in life
Protection for me, my children and my future wife.
Blessing me with seven gifts the beautiful family I can hold
I’m not gambling it all away, here are my cards, and I now fold.

When in times of need and when you neither are nor near
I then invite you into my dreams and look, you did hear!
Four times in my life I invited you; four times you were at my side
Soaring high above our sleeping bodies, soul mate spirits now glide.

Embarking on many journeys I go on so many dreaming quests
Is this heaven or is it hell? Or are they all just nothing but major tests?
My eyes are now opening and on the ends they stand all of my hair.
Another gift I now possess, you confirmed it, cause you showed up…
And meet me there!

(SirCARSr. 4-23-14)
Curt A Rivard Sr Apr 2014
In the beginning of the college class semester we all were asked to read and inter operate:) a poem and at the end of the semester we were asked to re-inter operate:) it and see how all of our thoughts and feelings were changed after taking a class on Death and Dying. The poem is called “The Angel of Death is Always with me” by Morton Marcus. My thoughts did not change and I took over the class with my interpretation because everyone else said it is something like a reaper knocking at your door ready to take you away.

THE ANGEL OF DEATH IS ALWAYS WITH ME

The Angel of Death is always with me
the hard wild flowers of his teeth,
his body like cigar smoke
swaying through a small town jail.

He is the wind that scrapes through our months,
the train wheels grinding over our syllables.
He is the footstep continually pacing through our
chests,
the small wound in the soul,
the meteor puncturing the atmosphere.
And sometimes he is merely a quiet between the start
of an act
and its completion,
a silence so loud
it shakes you like a tree.

It is only then you look up from the wars,
from the kisses,
from the signing of business agreements;
It is only then you observe the dimensions
housed in the air of each day,
each moment;
only then you hear the old caressing the cold rims of
their sleep,
hear the middle-aged women in love with their pillows
weeping into the gray expanse of each dawn,
where young men, dozing in alleys,
envision their loneliness to be a beautiful girl
and do not know they are part of a young girl's dream,
as she does not know that she is a dream in the sleep
of middle-aged women and old men,
and that all are contained in a gray wind
that scrapes through our months.

But soon we forget that the dead sleep in buried
cities,
that our hearts contain them in ripe vaults.
We forget that beautiful women dry into parchment
and ball players collapse into ash;
that geography wrinkles and smoothes
like the expressions on a face,
and that not even children
can pick the white fruit from the night sky.

And how could we laugh while looking at the face
that falls apart like wet tobacco?
How could we wake each morning
to hear the muffled gong beating inside us,
our mouths full of shadows,
our rooms filled with a black dust?

Still,
it is humiliating to be born a bottle:
to be filled with air, emptied, filled again;
to be filled with water, emptied, filled again;
and, finally, to be filled with earth.

And yet I am glad that The Angel of Death is always
with me:
his footsteps quicken my own,
his silence makes me speak,
his wind freshens the weather of my day.
And it is because of him
I no longer think
that with each beat
my heart
is a planet drowning from within
but an ocean filling for the first time.

And This is What I Told the Class….

Adolf ****** and the **** SS come to mind after reading the clue riddled poem, “The Angel of Death is Always with me”. Hiding between the lines I find there are many reference points to the holocaust and feelings of how it might have felt from a prisoner’s point of view.

If my assumptions are valid with this interpretation as far as the relationship of “death to Life” is concerned, one would think that after witnessing all the atrocities that one saw in those concentration camps, one would almost welcome death as soon as possible as a way to escape from their living nightmare and be welcomed back into being a part of the earth so they no longer have to whisper softly, “We are the dead” and pray that they become a victim of an accident of birth.

I normally don’t comment on other people’s works in poetry for the simple fact that I try to jump into their shoes and try to understand just what it is the message they are diligently trying to convey to the reader, and in the doing of so, I feel that I might misunderstand just what it is they are trying to tell the world and in the doing of so I would then not be able to make the ranks of a poet with originality.
(SirCARSr. 4-7-14)
Curt A Rivard Sr Apr 2014
“Death Talk”

A. Language: The use of euphemism or metaphors to communicate a subtler or deeper meaning than those associated with a planner speech. Example, It Was Curtains- Which in one’s mind could mean, after they log the minute and tag your right toe; then then cover your peaceful corpse with clean white linen concealing your body from all the others until only the powerful certain selected one’s can watch your private encore show.

B. Music: Themes of loss and death are heard in all the musical styles. It has been suggested that death imagery rock music helped break the taboo against public mention of death. Music artists also use their talents to send out a message that somehow we all can one way or another understand and relate to.

C. In literature: The meaning of death is often explored as it relates to society as well as the individual in the form of a poem or novel. Jahan Ramazani says, “The poetry of mourning for the dead assumes in the modern period an extraordinary diversity and range, incorporating more anger and skepticism, more conflict and anxiety than ever before”. It is also how I have a safety valve after everything that I take part in. Yes some of my written works are insane but I also have a deep feeling of respect and honor along with dignity when preparing a passed loved one onto there next journey.

2. “Theoretical Perspectives”

A. Structural Functionalism- Society controls individuals through physical and material restraints, but its true power derives from moral authority. Moral authority is experienced as an external force, which takes on a sacred quality because it is experienced as unlike ordinary forces and objects. Religion arises out of ritual. It is in religious rituals that society’s moral power is most clearly felt and where moral and social sentiments’ are strengthened and renewed. All death rituals, irrespective of their substance, operate to sustain common sentiments.

B. Symbolic Interaction- is how people learn in a society to continue to and carry their specific customs and beliefs, through interactions with other members within their society by learning the practice they were taught, grew accustomed and to witness growing up.

C. Social Learning- When it comes to the topic of death along with the feelings of grief and loss, there is no singular way that an individual copes with the emotions that persist. Death is a very difficult topic to deal with, and at best we can really only hope to learn all about it. Understanding it is an undertaking all by itself, and becoming an expert on such a topic is not something that many people can say is an easy topic to talk all about. One learns social learning through demonstrations, verbal instructions and through symbolic witnessing by means of movies, television, internet, literature, and radio through music.

3. “Subcultural differences in Death Customs”

When thinking of some different subcultural differences in death customs the Asian’s African. Hawaiian an Native Indian population come to mind because although in each geographical area they all may look the same, they are actually differ in their customs because there unique tradition. Say where one group may only bury as to where the next group close only by cremation and etc… One could also think that it could be both sides of the coin when you think as to the point of it being either a comforting experience or an anxiety producing event. In my opinion it all depends all upon the individual.

4. “Myself vs. Students (quoted on taking Death and Dying Class)

After reading the students comments from taking the course on Death and Dying, I would have to agree with the consensus that I believe that a greater majority of students would have a total different way of thinking and would seek a greater outlook on their own lives along with having a better appreciation of live in general upon completing such a course.

I also think that taking a course on Death and Dying as possibly a requirement for a consideration on an early discharge from the Correctional System could lead to positive results and crime rates would then drop. Statics prove that within the prison population there are a vast number of inmates who suffer from depression of a loss of some kind that spans all crimes that are committed and is a contributing factor to their actions.

As for me, the new values that could be obtained after taking such a course were already instilled within me for many years and until recently those values have then manifested themselves and then slowly then came into true contrast.

Within the endeavors I am now slowly undertaking pursuing a degree in Mortuary Science and in the process after witnessing all that is truly entailed, I often ponder and think to myself, what is it that I can do different so I don’t meet my time anytime soon, and how can I also have many more memorable moments with my children? Because, all the gifts I have already have received now makes me wonder how many more rewards now wait around the next corner. I feel that the life I now feel I must live one should be able to be able to enjoy a comfortable one that I now dream of and if pursued diligently with a positive outlook one can harness such a life and I truly feel it is now finally, at my fingertips

Thank You for your time reading. I put a lot into this assignment.

(SirCARSr. 4-3-14)
Mar 2014 · 822
Why Us?
Curt A Rivard Sr Mar 2014
He is looking down while sitting upon his mighty throne
He’s listening to all our pain and suffering as we moan and groan.
In this spiral disc we all call home we're held in its spinning arm
Commandments spell out; to no one shall you ever bring harm.
Into the vast never ending void of darkness there is a…
green and blue marble that is three hundred and sixty degrees round
If you sit and ponder all your thoughts all about it
you'll all see this place is just nothing more than just a massive burial ground.
Discriminating not for he needs to beloved hold
all his criteria is fulfilled and with it, the young and the old.
If detective’s cadaver dogs were let loose to smell the scent
down upon everyone’s knees we all then would be bent.
Seeing and smelling death everywhere I now do go
It won’t be too long before I feel someone’s no blood flow.
I can’t believe the things I am now seeing and hearing,
Do you pray to him and are you God fearing?

(SirCARSr 3-31-14)
Mar 2014 · 1.2k
It's All About You
Curt A Rivard Sr Mar 2014
I took a ****** crazy questionnaire last week
Results reveal, I am a narcissistic sick freak
Is that why I make people cringe when I speak?
Told to choose which column fits me the best
answer them in order and I must complete the test.
Filling in the bubbles as fast as I can go
If you study long then you study wrong I do know.
Choosing the answer that excites me the most I did not hesitate
Celebrity’s averages score a mere 15, me I took a 38!
All day long so many movies play deep inside my head
Now I know why I’m not afraid of being amongst the dead.
Many say I am delusional many more say I’m overly paranoid
Tell me then why do I have visions when I look into the void?
Seeing things before there time they are all unraveling
Exposing hidden agendas along with many a conspiracy
I know the answers here is my theory.
See, I felt this power and at the age of just thirteen
For I am caught stuck in limbo and I’m trapped somewhere in-between.
Heed unto to my words for now you all have been told
Rising to notorious fame the dead give me the power I now behold.
O’ No it’s happening again I’m having another major episode
Look at me, I’m a loaded cannonball that is ready to explode.
Confusing answers composed I stump peoples brains for they are so brittle
Dropping priest’s to their knees all because me and my son Joshua
together we solved the Bible’s most famous riddle.
So many clues and reference points all had been given
You can’t **** me because forever I will be living.
Don’t underestimate me, don’t get me confused
Exploiting you for what I can, yes you had been used.
Isn’t this fun, this cat and mouse game?
When my party’s over, trust you all will not forget my name!

Symptoms include are…

Believing that you're better than others, fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness, exaggerating your achievements or talent, expecting constant praise and admiration, believing that you're special and acting accordingly, failing to recognize other people's emotions and feelings, expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans, taking advantage of others, expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior, Being jealous of others, Believing that others are jealous of you, Setting unrealistic goals, Being easily hurt and rejected, Having a fragile self-esteem, Appearing as tough-minded or unemotional.
Till Later…
Welcome to the show!
(SirCARSr. 3-11-14)
Jan 2014 · 1.4k
Joshua's Ladder
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2014
Awoken to the sights and sounds
His body is contorting, teeth are grinding
And his feet are running wild.
Watching in pure amazement, his name is Joshua!
He’s my protégé and he’s my youngest child.
Letting him fulfill his dreaming task
When he returned back into his body
Where did you go I then did ask?
Murmuring words faster than I can decipher
He started to tell me it is the end of the world
And we all had to wear a gas mask.
Running zombies over while inside
Plexiglas ***** we're now in the futures past.
Rolling along heading to home base
And if they entered inside
All the alarms will then start to blast.
Fighting a battle together side by side
He said also that we did win.
Words cannot describe nor
Feelings can come close to compare
How it feels to know,
In his dreams he let me in!
(SirCARSr. 1-28-14)
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2014
Upon reading the article I found myself thinking that it was a topic tainting the beautiful art in the process of death. Death is something we all were born to one day or another eventually have to face whether we want to or not. Masking the process with mind altering drugs could possibly rob an individual of having a noble peaceful passing along with possible negative reactions from the surviving family members.

A question that came to mind after reading the assignment was, what was the family’s position in the decision to undertake such a treatment? Because death has a major impact on everyone left in the wake of losing a loved one.

In my current position I have to remain and always be neutral in my thoughts and if I find myself leaning one way or another I have to rebalance myself and never waiver to one side or another. In the Funeral Parlor business there are many religions that come seeking service and again I must encompass all denominations even if it is something I don’t believe in. I was never one to talk about political issues and definitely when the subjects about drugs ever come up I cannot afford to get involved with it.

In my pursuit of a higher education and working on obtaining a degree in the field of Mortuary Science I am beginning to see that my actions and reactions are now being redefined. I am also working on poise and proper composure along with training myself to think before speaking. In the field of Mortuary Science there is no room for mistakes for you only get one chance in every aspect in the business to make a lifelong memory of the situation that family’s face coming in for a service and a positive memory is what they expect.

Being a witness of the result of death on nearly a weekly and sometimes more basis, I have been entrusted and been welcomed into a community that only a select certain extremely  few individuals ever get to be a part of. There are many attributes that Funeral Directors in the field seriously look for in someone. It is imperative to always refrain from loose talk within the Funeral Home and especially in the Preparation Room and not to mention even in the public.

In last stage situations I have seen both sides of the coin and have to only accept not encourage one way or another if one chooses their avenue of departing. I’ve seen them pass away on heavy morphine and other drugs and also others stop all pain meds to go naturally and then the ones who also had no choice in the matter.

In closing, I found this assignment and subject matter extremely valuable to me because it gave me a perfect opportunity to express my true thoughts and beliefs along with practicing proper education in the field of Mortuary Science.

Death and Dying Class Assignment I received an 80 for a grade do to the avoidance of talking about the drug aspect. I feel that everyone in the class should have received a 100 because it was a reaction paper to what we all had to read.

(Sir Curt A. Rivard Sr. 1-24-14)
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2014
I thought about this paper for many weeks and just what it was I was going to write about. As hard as I can try, I can’t muster up any feelings in any shape or form. The only fear I now face is, when either my father or my girls mother who are both very close to be giving up the fight here on earth I ask myself will I even cry at their funeral and if I don’t what then will all the other family members then think of me? My only defense I guess, will be, I cried out all my tears when my brother had passed away and how he told me not to call for help as he knew he was dying on a ****** overdose. I still to this day deal with just that and how I wish I didn’t listen to what he had said.

All I remember was, when he got that 1.3M he told me he loved me, I was his dog Dollar and he was my Richie Rich and he’ll take care of me because I took care of him when everybody in the family turned him away until he got his money and that was when they all started to come out of the woodwork. Because I never took that into consideration he knew I was true to him and I had to honor a wish that he had given to me before we cashed the check. We both knew one of us probably would die as a result of it and his wish was to just let him be if things got real ugly.

I remember also how I cried all by myself in the funeral home and sat all alone in the church and that nobody in my family asked me if I was ok or even to tell me that they loved me rather then telling me I was next. I now know that they said all that only because he gave me money and tens of thousands they were.  He told me many times not to give any of the money he gave me because they didn’t take care of him for 5 years in a wheelchair like I had when he was **** *** poor and with nothing.

It is not out of hatred for not possibly being able to cry but rather I think I am now numb to such imagery. In the pursuit of the endeavor I am undertaking I am using the valuable skills I am gaining so maybe one day I will be able to possible give my children a life I feel everyone should enjoy. In the process of my newly gained knowledge in an undertaking that is shrouded in mystery to many, I am witnessing much more than the normal person could even fathom, handle, let alone I feel comprehend.

My funeral will be a private event for certain selected individuals that only my children deem fit to attend. As far as music and readings go, let them sing and speak their hearts out to me. My estate will be supervised and handled and given to my youngest son Joshua J. Rivard. I want to be wearing a custom tailored suit and without the backs cut out of them. I also wish to be placed in a full view casket till the time where I am then transported to a private location to begin the process of turning myself into a mummy.

Truly the sad part of this whole thing is, and the my hair on my forearms and on the back of my neck are tingling on their end's is, I had the true pleasure of embalming, casketing, and being a pole bearer for my elementary school teacher "Math Class with Mr.. D." (remember that poem?) and I had read his own obituary that he wanted printed for all to read in the local paper prior to his own death and here it is, my college class assignment. O' yeah, Yes I did place in his hands a scientific calculator a TI 81 it was that nobody got to see because nobody came to his awake but I filled in for the millions that should have been there for him. It also was a blessing to tell the funeral director to put him in a solid pecan wood coffin that was the most expensive and I got to keep the extra pillow and the vintage ribbon that was also inside. That is how my poem "Casket Pillow" also came to life.

(SirCARSr. 1-17-14)

Death and Dying Class assignment, Professor gave me a 90 for a grade.
Although this isn't a poem it is something I felt I owed to all my readers, Thank you all for reading and the time you spent thinking about what I had written.

Till Later, SirCARSr.....
Jan 2014 · 1.7k
Ctrl-alt-delete
Curt A Rivard Sr Jan 2014
It is year two thousand and fourteen
Reformatting my brain I’m dripping Dimethyltryptamine
Revelations is now here for I had a vision I had seen.
So many experiences now under my belt
Unexplainable sights overcoming I had seen
Smelling something like moth ***** is all I smelt.
I’m setting the stage, I am setting the scene.
Actions with matching words having ultimate precision
Three times is truly the lucky charm
Traveling to a brave new unseen world
Is this heaven, is this hell
Or am I stuck somewhere in-between?
Stepping outside myself I now watch and see
Confusing images revealing, turning me inside out
Suffocating my mind how is this happening to me?
High pitched frequency dialing in my ears are now ringing
Disconnected words lost why is he now not singing?
Honing on each and every instrument in his band
Everything that is happening to me is because
I had again awaking my pineal gland.
(SirCARSr. 1-8-14)
Dec 2013 · 1.6k
Helter Skelter
Curt A Rivard Sr Dec 2013
Against his will he’s confined in a notorious cell block mansion
Inmate number B-33920 his name, Charles Manson.
Some say he’s a prophet of living disaster
I beg to differ for what I can honestly see,
Never under estimate our power for he is also a vision master.
So charismatic diamonds start to fall off his tongue
There picking them up as his blessed words begin to flow.
Paying for a crime he never did any wrong
The panel was rigged and the prosecutor
Knew which way the final verdict would go.
Living in fear all the members of the jury
If it were random picks I’d be the hold out
Just to see the audience eyes become burning blurry
And to watch the splinters fly in the air
As the gavel comes smashing down in a hurry.
Denying freedom each and every time
The parole board does forever plan.
Under duress they have no choice for they been warned
Secretly hiding behind alias screen names
I predict there also joining his internet fan club clan.
Exploiting him for their own financial gain
The state’s making profits just because of his name
And to me they are the ones, who are savage
Because if the DOC loses custody of their celebrity
They then will lose their stimulus package.
At head count his body may physically be there
But in his mind, he’s walking on warm desert sand
As he pretends he is in Death Valley.
As for me, I’m lurking in the street
And hiding in a back alley.

Helter Skelter, Helter Skelter, Helter Skelter
Let him go, let him go, let him go!

(SirCARSr. 12-6-13)
Dec 2013 · 1.9k
Separation Anxiety
Curt A Rivard Sr Dec 2013
The pain gets stronger and stronger
each and every minute you are not near.
Distant haunting screams now fill my ears
as my eyes start searching, there about to tear.
I can never make it without you
and losing you is my only fear.
Vows given to you many years ago
promising, right behind you I will instantly also go.
Never shall we ever be apart
and if so, that is when all the killing will start.
Deepest of all connections we do share
complimenting each other we are the perfect pair.
So weak I am for I give you all my power
I’m writing this poem and it’s all about you
and look you have been only gone for a half an hour.
Please hurry, have fun and come back home to me, OK
because there has never been a day
where we haven’t seen each other every day.
Searching high and low for the fountain of youth
hoping to fulfill the only wish you ever spoke that you did
All because you said,
“Daddy, I wish you were like me,
so we can be together forever".
and then questioned me with,
Why can't you become a little Kid?"

(SirCARSr. 12-5-13)
Nov 2013 · 1.8k
All Hands Bury the Dead
Curt A Rivard Sr Nov 2013
Silently standing in formation as your feet are hanging overboard
A burial at sea is an honor and now it is your much deserved reward.
USS. Ships slowly coming to a halt many nautical miles off the coast
Today is a beautiful day and you’re the decorated remembered host.
As for him, when his ship rolled up upon Saigon's shore
he received many campaign stars for his chest while serving his tour.
Clanging medals as he still now walks all about and right from the start
He told me he was to fast to get caught and in return,
he smiled at me because he never did receive a purple heart.
The stars and stripes are now starting to swirl into one and another
contorting colors now begin to weep while flying at half-mast
Squeezing triggers the firing party’s rifle’s now begin to blast.
As you’re lying there peacefully and in your "Aurora" stainless steel bed
A special scripture is read and prayers are then said.
Tilting the platform so you slide off and fall into the deep ocean
with twenty holes two inch in diameter
and one hundred and fifty pound bags of sand hidden at your feet
when you get to the bottom, Davy Jones, you will then meet
till then you’re heading to the floor traveling there
like always, in slow motion.

(SirCARSr. 11-30-13)
Nov 2013 · 841
Stuck in A De’Ja’ Vu
Curt A Rivard Sr Nov 2013
Walking back through time the Cuckoo’s clock pendulum still doth swing
Showing you that today, you have been there so long ago before
Do you, or do you not, hear its beautiful heavenly angels now sing?
As your traveling through that sacred invisible door,
Questions now come to life because you’re looking for something
Is it an answer or are you looking for something more?
Inside your skull that ear shattering buzzing now does ring
Elusive details within a disorientating disarray
You’re now asking yourself, why am I trapped inside this **** thing,
How long will it last, and how long will I stay?
Dealing now with the distant and so long ago past
Dreams and visions upon you all of them you now cast.
The gift of another sight it is given to you each and every night
Interpretations now rush upon you as soon as you pray
And after you turn out the light.
Why do I feel as if I have been here before?
As I ask and pray at the side of my bed
With my knees upon the floor.

(SirCARSr. 11-29-13)
Nov 2013 · 1.4k
Black Magic Pincushions
Curt A Rivard Sr Nov 2013
I have this list and every morning I generate a report
they are all my pre paid funeral contracts.
When my need to touch the dead go unfulfilled
I then turn to black magic as a last resort.
Washing my hands with aloes, myrrh and frankincense
I’m now lighting candles and burning sweet smelling incense.
Hidden within a handmade miniature coffin
My voodoo doll does doth hide,
It’s hiding in my desks draw buried deep inside.
Exposing now a needle filled body and face
Telling the story of how many I had cursed and sent into space.
As I am pushing that pin through it's chest and out it’s back
Someone on my list is in front of their family,
Having a massive heart attack.

(SirCARSr. 11-27-13)
Nov 2013 · 2.8k
The Trumpets of Jericho
Curt A Rivard Sr Nov 2013
Under his mighty authority, he sent forth a pair of spies
Hidden by a harlot they now became Joshua’s eyes.
Saving her and all that she has for what she hath done
Later when they come to burn down the city
Her and her family will be spared, there the only one.
Assembling a band of seven priest’s in those strange lands
He’s ordering them to encompass and circle the city
While carrying the Ark of Covenant in their holy hands.
Preparations now begin for a  symphony of destruction
it is for all the other inhabitants, due to all the corruption.
Commanded until the appointed time to remain in silence
After that, scream and shout loud with ragging violence.
Marching with the trumpets at their side and on their hips
It’s the seventh day, and now, they must make seven trips.
The walls then came crumbling down,
After they blew through those ram horns with their lips.
Taking there treasures, the spoils of  war...
They took it for the Lord's treasury,
That is who they took it for.

AMEN
(SirCARSr. 11-25-13)
Nov 2013 · 1.1k
Sleep Walker
Curt A Rivard Sr Nov 2013
O’ no he’s at it again where will his little feet take him, where will he go?
Eyes wide open but yet he can’t even see.
If you could witness what had just happened you would then suddenly know.
It is a bizarre and an unknown phenomenon
As he is putting on his very own sleepwalking show.
Walking around and around your inside a fog filled maze
Guiding whispers that only you can hear there protecting you
Because you’re blind when you’re in that heavenly haze.
Oblivious to wonder as if you are free
Drifting in and out of a confusional arousal
If you want to know just what had happened, just ask me.
What visions had this prophet did witness
As he is walking all about in his sacred given bliss?
So happy he now found me in what they call
A dominant disorder with reduced penetrance
I can’t explain it but…if you ask him,
He calls it nothing more than,
Just having a death dance.

(SirCARSr. 11-23-13)

I Love you Joshua J. Rivard even though you scare me to death...
Nov 2013 · 1.0k
For the Greater Good of God
Curt A Rivard Sr Nov 2013
Are there secrets that you do keep?
Or do you reveal them all to him before you go to sleep?
Begging him for forgiveness because you don’t want to sin no more
Asking him over and over to just take them all away
Please sweep them all out my heart, out my mind and throw them out the door.
Promises that were given like it shalt never again flood
And if we accept him, were protected by his Son's ransom blood.
I can see it in all their eyes and it happens every time I look about
Can you hear his angels whisper and sing or does he need to scream and shout?
Whatever God you know, he knows you better than you do think.
When they found him, bound him and crucified him
And he died up upon that old cross,
I don’t know about you all,
But I know,
I mourn everyday his loss.
AMEN
(SirCARSr. 11-16-13)
Nov 2013 · 1.2k
Fogless Mirrors Again
Curt A Rivard Sr Nov 2013
Shouts of a distinct color there screaming a code blue
You can’t be saved because the reaper has his claws
deep inside and there is nothing now a Dr. can do.
Pull the drapes, log the minute and tag the toe
To the hospital’s basement you now must go.
It’s a private encore only my eyes can see
I’m watching you laying there on the prep room table
Can you get up or are you not able?
******* on your wrist and I’m sniffing at your neck
No heartbeat, no pulse only Rigor Mortis
slowly setting in is the only thing I can detect.
Placing my vintage sterling pocket hand mirror in your clutch
Lifting it up for you, to your frigid blue lips it must touch.
Looking for something like fog or the morning dew
Nope it’s not there so now it’s time to
Embalm You!
(SirCARSr. 11-02-13)
Curt A Rivard Sr Oct 2013
Here we are once again...
time now makes me reflect
we are within the first forty eight
and now all I want to do is just celebrate.
was it  your time to pay for what you had done?
with hatred in my heart, my prayers are,
I hope it hurt and it wasn't done quickly with a gun..
did you think you could replace me with everything for my 1st son.
Years now have passed and still you hide
day by day your turning to rust and to me it is so much fun.
it was such a shame when you decided to play the that game.
when you looked  in the eyes,
my only hope is.......
you'll remember my name:)

(SirCARSr 10-24-13)
Oct 2013 · 1.5k
Casting Lots
Curt A Rivard Sr Oct 2013
Blessed with children I was asked to be there protector
On a loan and watching my every move
You are looking, for you’re the sole investor.
At a breaking point and thinking all about fleeing
I try and tell myself I can get through this
But why does it seem there’s no end to what I am seeing?
I was wishing and I was wanting, I just wanted it all to stop
Because I was tired of drowning and I wanted to get back to the top.
experiencing torrents of emotions crashing wave upon wave
I can't seem to see any way out and now all I want is to be in a grave.
In this darkness and with no light I'm praying to you please let me win this fight.
You turned my eyes to your words once again
And look there it was, the chapter title all in yellow
Hiding deep within the scriptures that are written
Suddenly right before my eyes I saw the pages turn into a mirror
As the goosebumps all started to rise, I then saw, I was him, I was that fellow.
Starring at myself in the reflection
I then heard a voice telling me to have trust
And throw all my worries over to him
And if I did, I’ll be on my way again to perfection.
Thank you lord for spiting me out back on solid land,
I could have never did it,
Without your loving helping hand.
(SirCARSr 10-18-13)
Oct 2013 · 1.0k
Paranoid Overtones
Curt A Rivard Sr Oct 2013
They are watching my every move in the night
Quietly looking at me like a rabid raven.
If you could see deep inside my head
It would look like a movie made by Wes Craven.
My methodical homicidal ideas running fast and running ramped
Trying ever so hard not to get caught
I have no choice but to top the last at what I just did.
My mind is pounding hard and my heart is racing
As I am dripping with sweat back and forth I am pacing.
Studying about all the others hoping now not to get caught
When they had finished what they had done, I often think,
What was it that they had did they did thought.
Keeping secrets buried locked deep inside
When they questioned me with their questions, I lied.
I am the king of given many a death wish
Pushing you in with handcuffs behind your back
Now you’re sinking to the bottom forever chilling with the fish.
Verbally murdering you with these lines,
When I’m in my death bed, I’ll confess, all my death crimes.
Till then question me all you what I don’t care,
No how many times.
(SirCARSr 10-10-13)
Sep 2013 · 1.1k
Corresponding for a Corpse
Curt A Rivard Sr Sep 2013
Subliminal messages they all give to thee
Telling me to reveal to their family
All the things they said to me.
Out there mouths the tales are told
After the casketing the letter X
With their arms I do fold.
Penning these words a gift I have been given
I write for the dead and I write for the still living.
Many a story, many a tale
Before it is to late there’s a special one
That I need to write that is in brail.
It’s time to lock your music box now
Locking you in forever your helping me on my quest
I hope to see you again someday soon
Till then have a good rest.
(SirCARSr. 9-04-13)
Aug 2013 · 1.4k
Souls of The Forgotten
Curt A Rivard Sr Aug 2013
In the morgues basement, I found you hiding
Compassionate feelings overcoming, in your favor they are dividing.
After holding your remains in that tin can
I came up with an idea I devised a master plan.
Body 2 Bones will be my informative speech in my class
They don’t know it yet out your urn, the bag all around, I will pass.
Some will be scared, and many jaws will drop to the floor
But I know, there will be a few that will be begging to see some more.
Thirty eight years in there trapped you did stay
Rubbing the side I then saw you, a genie inside I saw emerged
Out you came and now it’s time to play.
Asking me now to give a breath of fresh air
I opened your bag, I ran my fingers through
With wide opened eyes I did stare.
I kept you ten nights on my maple night stand
I did some digging and I learned, you came from a different land.
Having to now put you back, I’m fighting with all my might
Back into the darkness, darker then the night
You won’t rest, till your family comes to claim
Someday they will come.
till then don’t give up the fight.
(SirCARSr.08-13-13)
Aug 2013 · 2.3k
Serial Killer of 06351
Curt A Rivard Sr Aug 2013
Haunting voices now have you forever stuck in a trance
Telling you that today is the day, you can do it, just take a chance.
Uncontrollable impulses and feelings you cannot tame
You don’t know it yet, but when you’re done
You’ll have many to claim and 06351 will never forget your name.
You fought it hard, and all your known life
Today you did it; you took madam ****** as your wife.
An intimate secret your keeping locked deep inside your head
Before the night is over, you’ll be washing off all the blood before you go to bed.
He's now spreading there legs wide and making them scream
As he's stealing there innocence, I bet he whispered in there ears let me in for this is not a dream.
Something’s not settling very well, six more now have been found bringing his count now to eight
With road blocks and check points all around he knows why he can tell.
Acting like nothing has ever happened he’s in his house
Pacing back and forth he’s trying to be, quiet as a mouse.
Buying the paper and watching the nightly news
He’s looking for signals, he’s looking for signs
He wants to know, do the police have any clues.
Injecting himself trying to help mislead the investigator’s at the police station
Now he finds himself, the number one suspect in the investigation.
Adamant at steering them in the wrong direction
If he left it alone he would have got away with it all and with complete perfection.
Six consecutive life sentences he won’t finish he did receive
Cause he has a date with the needle while the families still grieve.
shortly after witnessing his execution and for the day for him to pay for what he had done
One of the victim’s fathers walked into his back yard
And blew is chest apart and wide open with his shotgun.
(SirCARSr 08-07-13)
Aug 2013 · 1.0k
The Collector
Curt A Rivard Sr Aug 2013
I'm collecting specimen trophies inside vintage blue mason jars
they’ll never know because I’m a master at concealing all the scars.
Hoarding bits and pieces here and there
In zip lock bags you’ll find locks of their hair.
They say some steal diamonds and some steal gold
as for me, hey, I take frozen slices of their flesh when there cold.
I have no heart, I have no soul
I have no morals and I love being ever so bold.
What a wonderful privilege only the chosen ones do get to see,
Tell me, why do I have this sneaky suspicion that you all are now watching me?
I'm hungering for the frigid rigor touch of death
And, till you catch me in the act...
I’m on a nightly prowl to also steal,
your last breath!
(SirCARSr 8-02-13)
Curt A Rivard Sr Jul 2013
Thanks all my readers

You are all the reason why

I write death creepers :)
Jul 2013 · 834
The Price of Freedom
Curt A Rivard Sr Jul 2013
O' King, O' King
O' when can we sing?
The words of independence, the words of our joy?
You tax us harshly, for your own gain,
And we are the people who suffer in the pain.
You stand there looking ever so bold,
Wearing all that fancy glitter and gold.
That's all fine by me, because I am willing to fight, fight to be free!
"Look there people!" There's a place to the west, I can see in the distance,
are you willing to brave the trip, for hopes to live life to it's best?

(Curt A. Rivard Sr. 07-04-2003)
Jun 2013 · 2.7k
Held In Loving Arms
Curt A Rivard Sr Jun 2013
The Lord is my Shepherd and now I have not a single need
An infinite given gift given to me for everything that I ever did was a good deed.
So warm the beautiful glow upon my new complexion
As I walked into his crimson fortress I can see all his creations
And they were done to complete perfection.
Following the beams as they all converged into one and another
There showing me the way to my new home
Please mourn and weep no more because I am not alone
In my left hand I hold the Lords hand and in the right is son Jesus.
Walking hand in hand in this heavenly bliss I am again with the ones I did miss
With all the wonderful things that are up here to do,
Always know that I am looking down upon you.
When you see not a cloud in the sky and you feel the rush of wind come upon you
Fear not for it is me wrapping my arms all around you.
Until we can meet once again, rejoice in knowing that I now sit and eat at the Lords table
And at night he rocks me to sleep in his pure white arms
As if I’m his new born baby in his loving cradle.
AMEN
(SirCARSr 10-03-13)
Jun 2013 · 3.3k
Blessed With Visions
Curt A Rivard Sr Jun 2013
The smoke signals are rising higher and higher
Spelling out the truth after you had lit the fire
now your spirit soars high above the funeral pyre
And In a matter of split seconds you’ll be living out all your heart’s desire.
Looking for why screams fill the night and how the madness steals the light
Because when you close your eyes your seeing floating smiling skulls and with no death fright
No matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, you know you have seen them all before
Faces in morgue room when they were gone asking them why did they not put up a fight and decide to go into the light?
Was I marked before and just didn’t know it then? But it’s now seen on my right hand
I’m an aimlessly wondering nomad who can see everything I even see the Promised Land
Standing looking deep inside, holding a black mirror to a silver mirror forever I will walk that pathway
A path I know I can control with the slightest turn of my hands and I can never look behind
When the smoke came billowing out I felt that I now have a new passion for life and that’s now where I want to always stay.
A secret hiding in the jungle rainforest is buried deep away from the sun’s rays, it’s under the dirt
Put negative thoughts aside, your life is not broken and you’re not going to lose your mind
Focus on what you really want and know your only a one of a kind, trust me, believe me, it won’t hurt.
A foul smell is in the air, a pungent taste is on your tongue, snowflakes are forming inside the glass as you chase the holy smoke
Never felt this way ever before, so fast it rushed up apon me I closed my eyes tight but why  can I still see?
Now I know another one of his magic tricks and also how he made the blind once again see.
Prisms of colors in a kaleidoscope,  laser precision lines atop of pyramids  
The truth to what Stonehenge really is, the asteroid belt being formed right before me
Easter Island being nothing more than just the people who were turned to salt for looking back
It gave upon me the gift of prophesy, the answer to Samson’s riddle and it also showed myself being conceived, what more will it show me?
The greatest euphoria I now have felt to date, it’s in my system, it’s in me, its in you, is my brain having  another overload dumping or
am I having a DMT hallucination?
Please someone hurry and please tell me.
(SirCARSr 6-12-13)
Jun 2013 · 892
Earning My Keep
Curt A Rivard Sr Jun 2013
The Lord is my shepherd he knows what I want
Because I ask him every morning and I ask him every night
He knows I don’t ask for too much and he gives it all in return
After I receive and see the conformation, it’s once again my turn
To prove I can be humble and to prove I can still be one of his chosen one's
Blessing me with a sacred gift, a special one I can never abuse, and the best is,
He lets me filter out the burning rays so I can see right through the sun
Exposing to me a tiny hole in the sky and a bright light flickering on the other side
Many a time my hair stands on its end and I can feel it from head to toe
A light bulb it is for I was told giving fuzzy felling’s it’s all warm when it starts to glow
A mere child I once used to be, watch what it is next now that it is to become of thee
Given me chances I know the risk that is at hand setting up to be a failure is not my plan
There is nothing that I cannot do because I follow all my dreams
and all my visions like they are a perfect blue print plan that has been layed out before me.
(SirCARSr 6-03-13)
May 2013 · 940
The Curse Of My Tomb
Curt A Rivard Sr May 2013
I wish I were a Pharaoh, and you were my Queen
So we then can live in a pyramid together when we pass on.
When our bodies lie stretched out in sleep,
Upon the walls is sketched-
The last appointment our patient souls must keep.
Like mummies that have been wrapped ever so tight
I wish we would never be disturbed
Not even by a single ray or a beam of light
Plunder my tomb and you better be ready for a death fight
I am a mad man genius and my madness goes long into the night
I’d also be sure that the hieroglyphics’ would say
That we would be wrapped tightly together,
And all our worldly possessions be left behind to our children
For the only thing we would need in the afterlife is…
Each other.

(SirCARSr. 2001)
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