I went back to the doctor
And I swear, this is no fib
He told me that the line I found
Was ...get this...yes..a rib!!!
I told him, doc, you're crazy
I've not seen one in years
Except for ones I eat in bars
And wash down with ten beers
He said, "Well, Mr. Turner"
"That's a rib...as sure as ****"
He said "you must be losing weight"
"and you've uncovered it"
"I've been a doctor for a long, long time"
"and believe me when I say"
"I've seen a lot of ribs my boy"
"And I'm seeing one today"
I asked him "will I soon get abs?"
He told me "that will come in time"
"Don't put the cart before the horse"
"That sir, is a crime"
"You've found a rib, you're doing well"
"Your bloodwork came back good"
"Cholesterol is way way down"
"It's showing what it should"
I said "I can't believe it"
"good blood and ribs as well"
"I've got to get on facebook"
"I've lot's of folks to tell"
I then went on to tell him
I could see below my lap
He said "it's not your *****"
"It's just a dried up ,old , skin flap"
"Take your time and you'll get healthy"
"You've more ribs to go and get"
"You're doing much, much, better"
"But, your'e still not healthy...yet"
I said "there's something wiggling"
"When I look down, past my nose"
He said, "you won't believe me..."
"But, I think you see your toes"
I couldn't take the good news
I almost fainted dead away
Good blood, a rib, and now my toes
This was a special day
The best part of this visit
The most important news
Is that because I see that skin flap
I'm no longer peeing on my shoes!!