frantic
hands ripping through air
reaching for a grasp
on your sadness

I have been
will be
am
enraptured in your temperature.
contented in contempt
for your fairytale past
impossible
to impact

yet coveting the forbidden
taste
of imprints
in your reality
sparks a dorment sentiment
of such coarse,
rough reciprocity

tempting taste of your bliss
come close
and through shifting smoke
we can descend into
crude togetherness

you say i trust to equal those in the past
whom have brought only pain and hatred
upon those in their wake?
well it's time to take a look in the mirror
my friend, no, wait, don't do that,
i wouldn't want to inflate your ego
it would come as no surprise to me if in that
mirror you would only see the eighth wonder
of the world, ever wondered if you could see
the world? i take that back, there is no sense
in snapping and losing my temper,
but all i'm doing is back tracking and
finding my self exempt of the respect that i
deserve, only you can serve to notice
the pain that you have harboured
upon the empty hearts of which now yearn
for that ever self-loving and i can only leave
you with this advice

turn around and back off
that ain't love it's idolatry.

More out of life
More out of love
More out of peace
More out of grace
More out of spirit
More out of Earth
More out of joy
More out of
Those peaceful
Quiet moment in
Your soul when you
Know you are complete
And you are exactly where
You need to be at all times and
When you can feel the Earth and our
Mother and spirit flowing through every
Pour of your existence until you get
To that point in yourself where
You can accept that you
Are able to have
More peace
More grace
You are ready
To be whole
We are all
Craving for
That oneness
Connecting
With the
Common
Collective
We call
Humanity
In loving
Peaceful
Ways

I know what it is like to feel passion;
the way my skin tingles at your touch
Leaving me breathless and wanting more.
The two of us entangled in the darkness.
your blinds drawing shadows across my figure
As your fingers gently graze my cheek.
you penetrate my soul with your own
and I feel so close to you it hurts.

I know what it is like to love another;
denounce your whole being unto him and trust
Him with the power to destroy your essence.
He will never know what he has done to me.
He will never know the power he has over me.
He will never know the passion I have for him now.

I know what it is like to be in love; for
I am captivated by your eyes,
by the upturned corners of your mouth
and most simply by the feeling I get around you.

I'm not really a rude person,
I'm just being like this
in order for you not to notice
that I'm starting to like you.

Trees line the riverbank,
I sat, still waiting for you.
Our names are written on a tree;
I remember, you were not mine,
you were never mine to keep.

Our childhood memories
stained my mind, lingering forever,
but it was a mistake
and I have never been consoled.
Now, I could not seem to find you,
you were gone as years grew old.

You helped me conquer fears
and taught me how to love that day,
when loving seems so naive.
I remember, you were not mine,
you were never mine to keep.

We cherish this place,
our vows, nobody cares.
We sailed the river together
and promised to never let go.
Sometimes river is just river.

Memories of this riverbank,
I wept, still waiting for you.
Alone, but this river must flow;
I remember, you were not mine,
you were never mine to lose.

Here's to you,
I'll raise my glass.
You don't lie worth ****
but I'll let that pass.

I didn't say
that it was wrong
to live on the dark side,
it just isn't for me.

I told you
what I wanted
and you told me
how you felt.

It appears that
I was just another
notch on your
yard long belt.

It's too late
to take back
the things we said,
whether they
were said in the kitchen
or said in the bed.

You're not hard
to look at,
but that just won't do,
you're poison to my system,
worse than the flu.

For a while
we were on a roll,
until it came to the point
that you asked me
to sell my soul.

You lied so much
and now you play
the old stand by card,
how you are afraid of me,
that I just make your life so hard.

But it isn't me that makes the calls,
leaving message after message,
they all start with rants,
as soon as I hear your voice
I hit save.
I don't listen later,
why I keep them
is a mystery to me.
It looks as if now
you are just some part of my history.

Yes, now things are different,
our friendship of years is dead,
still I find I need a turn-key,
one to unlock my head.

I ache for the
love of your children,
the ones that
I have known for years.
on the outside I don't cry
but on the inside
I'm full of tears.

Now that our friendship
is dead and gone
I know I have to grieve,
what I don't know
is in what way
and for how long.

Things will change,
they always do
but there is no chance
that they will change for you.

I still love you,
I love you as a friend.
But your addictions
are so bad of a sign
that killing you softly
is what comes to mind.

Yesterday, as well as today,
I miss what was,
I miss what was the good.
Your children must
be so confused,
that I  no longer come around,
but to try and keep up the game
would not be very sound.

And now I hear
through the grapevine
that you are pregnant once again.
You can't afford the ones you have,
to include another is nothing
short of insane.

Your partner lives thousands
of miles away so he can make
the money it takes
to feed and clothe the ones
already here,
while you take his checque
and spend hundreds a month on
entertaining your fair weather friends
and beer.

You kept me around
as long as I was your go- to- guy,
someone to babysit
and drive you around.

When I started saying'no'
everything changed.
Nothing will be different
until your life
is rearranged.

There became no more requests to visit,
no invites for supper.
Well that is all well and good
but for the most part
it's your children that suffer.

So it's good bye, so long,
you've cut me out of the family.
But I guess everything must come to an end.
My only hope is that you will pull
yourself together and once more
I'll be able to call you a friend.

I'm all about forgive and forget,
I'm just not there yet.
Your slap in the face
when I brought over
your Christmas gifts
and what you said to
my friends.

Just as there are always
so many beginnings,
I see that there are also
so many ends.

Inside I cry,
outside I grimace,
but it is what it is none the less.

So here's to you,
may you hold it together.
May the days you have in store
be called somewhat better.
for now let us keep
our distance,
steer clear of one another
right down to the letter.

Once you can put down the glass
and return to what is the real world,
perhaps we can talk again,
perhaps we can 'let it go'
and once more address each other as 'my friend'.

© 2013

I looked up and saw you,
You looked like a hero,
Halos of gold shined above your head,
You rebuilt roads that were broke,
You fixed every problem,
You kept together our home,
I wanted to be just like you,
My heart swelled with love for you.
I was your little solider,
I was your little helper,
I was your little friend,
I was your baby girl,
You were my best friend.
It was all to my surprise,
The man I loved with all my heart,
Didn't have love for me at all,
If he loved me, he wouldn't have done what he did,
He loved his drugs and alcohol,
He always got so mean,
Maybe he doesn't remember,
But I'll never be able to forgot what he did to me.
I still live with the broken remains,
The sad memories,
Of the love that I once had,
Now all I feel is the loss, the pain, and the break,
I've become so confused,
I can't live with what you did,
It's just to much.

The night plays it's melody
Soothing and enchanting
Luring you into a spell
A false contentedness.
Where you need your sleep.
I trudge slow
I still want to be up
Listening to your sweet voice
Having you telling me sweet nothing's
making my heart warm.
All I want is all night with you
To keep you up and love you
In every possible way.
The day's hours don't seem enough
for our loving.
Enchant me again
with your lips and touch.
Butterflies at your bidding
I want it all with you.