Crazy were my feelings for him.
Crazy, how blind I was to his lies.
Crazy, how stupid I was to believe them.
Crazy, were my efforts to sustain a relationship that I knew wouldn't last.
Crazy, that everything was my fault.
Crazy, how jealous he got.
Crazy, the saddness I felt.
Crazy, were the actions I took to alleviate the pain.
Crazy, how selfish he was with my love.
Crazy, that he finally knew what he had once it was gone.
Crazy, that I care no more.
& the craziest thing? ... How quickly he moved on.

His smile, sincere.
His eyes, mysterious.
His look, intense.

Our energy, powerful.  

His voice, calming.
His words, thoughtful.
His personality, addicting.

Our conversation, enticing.

His mind, knowing.
His touch, breathtaking.
His embrace, comforting.

Our chemistry, electrifying.

His kiss, intoxicating.
His body, sinful.
His love, unyielding.

I want to love like my Mother loves my Father,
I want to love like my Father loves my Mother.
A love that is never ending,
A love that has gone through many ups and downs.
His ability to listen to her stressful rants,
Her selfless acts to let him know she cares.
I want to love someone the way my Mother loves my Father,
I want someone to love me the way my Father loves my Mother.

Slow exhales in close quarters,
release swirls of hot steam.
Calming notes of chamomile and mint bursting from my cup.

Eyes closed.

Filling me with a sense of security;
as if each breath out, breaks down my fatigue from the day
allowing me to wipe it away, as you would a mirror after a steamy shower.

Window cracked.

The pitter patter of rain as lightning illuminates the sky;
my feet encased by my fathers wool socks
buried deep beneath my covers searching for warmth.

Slow exhale.

& I sink deeper into my bed, detaching myself from reality,
erasing today's to-do list
trying desperately not to create tomorrows.

A long slow sip.

Clinging to its heat - begging it to stay,
reluctantly letting it dissipate from my tongue
as if it would help me unwind faster.

I close my eyes.

I see my Mothers warm radiant smile,
my Fathers soft caring eyes
& my two Brothers' inviting protective embrace.
Blessed, I am.

Slow exhale.

A crisp fresh breeze tickles my nose,
I feel my skin melt into my sheets;
welcoming relaxing rejuvenation.

Slow exhale...