stop swimming
in oceans of shame,
of guilt, of regret.
let grace be your lighthouse
and swim to its shore.
let yesterday drown
in the sea of forgetfulness
and let go.
the past is not yours.

I was a funeral pier of regrets
as I burned in undeniable solace,
your departure was a shadow
left in the embers of my heart.

But it was only a flickering moment
and you picked up the ashes of love
and drew a new beginning on the
shadows of what once was...

The frosted grass reminds me of you
Like most things do
Frigid but beautiful
Cold but lively
Lacking itself but promising
Potential is a dangerous quality
Because once the grass thaws  
Once it's vibrance and summer texture
returns
Everyone will forget that it was once frozen

I was swept away upon your arms

Like air my heart flew beyond its gravity,
Of all the moments you could have chosen
Valuing my thoughts as I smile onwards,
Every mentioning was music from your lips

Your the one my heart only beats upon
Our hands locked as our hearts became one
Under the stars saying those words "I love you, and I was yours.

For once I did not secretely crave his rescue.
I did not want to be scooped up
And have my pain smoothed over
By kisses.

I wanted to sit alone
Hold my pain in tightened fists
and stare at the wall.

As if I was looking for an answer to my misery.
Staring for another world to hide in but all I saw was a blank slate
And when I pressed my forehead
To the cold paint,
I did not hear an echo
Or a whisper to help solve my problem.

All that there was in this room
Was empty

Including me.

Teacup, you probably don't know this but I'm fighting
trying to find a way to make you happy, to brighten your day,
but the lighting is out of place, and I've been facing demons alone.
Teacup, home is everything that's by your side, so don't try to hide,
please don't say goodbye because I'm running out of answers,
the question dances in my mind, how much more can I take
was I one of your mistakes, did I misjudge the situation I'm in.

Teacup, you probably don't know this but I'm fighting
trying to find a way to make you smile, even if it's just for a while
I would survive the wild just with the thought of your smile.
Everything positive I have felt, has started with meeting you,
so renew the starting hand we've been dealt and find a new way
to overcome the lightning, the clouds and the thunder.
Bring us closer under the spell of love.

Teacup, you probably don't know this but I'm fighting
but I'm losing you and it's scaring me...
I'm fighting but I'm losing you...

I was infected with yearnings of a place
that I once lingered upon, where memories
were like ash in my mouth. I ached in
reflections of those wondering halls,
rooms like prisons of my subconscious.

The symptoms of my deliberation were
incoherent as I regressed to the needing
to be in this place once more. An epidemic
of memories flooded over me, and I collapsed
onto the remains of my youth aged in disorder.

*"There is no place like home, the affliction of my youth,

I choose to hold you
In my dreams
Because in my dreams
You have no end