I never learned how to swim,
And now I'm drowning in my thoughts.

My ears are full of water,
My side is cramping up.
The goggles you gave me are foggy
And my lungs are shriveling up.

I feel the water in my brain,
Swirling around my thoughts.
One moment I think you love me,
The next, you love me not.

And maybe if I learned to swim,
Maybe things would've worked out.
But I guess we'll never know,
My mind is now full of doubt.

But even great swimmers
Sometimes need help.
That's why there's lifeguards at the Olympics
Alongside Michael Phelps.

But I never learned how to swim,
And I'm drowning in my own thoughts.
But you said you would teach me,
It's too late, I'm seeing dark spots.

So let me sink to the bottom of the pool,
Where swimmings not important anyhow.

My dying wish
Is to hate myself less,
Love others more,
And stop being depressed.
To pick myself up
And move on, not regress.
But these feelings
Are hard to suppress;
All the distress you put me in,
Still shows to this day,
You can see it on my face,
I doubt it'll ever go away.
But maybe if im lucky,
My wish might come true,
My life would be over,
And thats when I'll get over you.

How many heart strings have to break
Before you die of a broken heart?
How many shards of glass must enter my skin
Before im completely torn apart?
How many times can someone be beaten and battered
Before they become broken for good?
How many hearts in the world feel numb
From the ice growing around them?
But is the ice on your heart
There to heal it from pain
Or is it there
Because you no longer care?
Play the blues on my
Heart strings
So that I can feel the rhythm
As I sing.

I had a dream that I was drowning,
I could feel my body, bobbing up and down
In the chilling, icy water.

When I opened my eyes,
Everything was dark, was I blind or could I see,
Was I drowning in water or blood that came from me?

It was blood, yes, though it wasn't my own,
Was I drowning just to drown,
Or was I too broken and alone?

But whose blood was it, if it wasn't mine,
How did it get there, where was there,
And where am I?

Face down in a pool, of thick red blood,
Freezing to death,
And sinking in like mud,

I am fading quickly, as I am near my last breath,
I whisper your name
At my last gasp.

My lungs fill with your blood,
I am nearing my end,
I killed you, and now I'm dying,

Like Romeo and Juliette,
Our story came to an end.

Did you ever notice the hidden words
In peoples names?
I did. I still do.

Like the silent "hell"
Hidden in
Michelle.

And I wonder if it's a
Coincidence or just
Very unfortunate.

But then I realize that theres a
Devil hiding inside
Your soul.

Your frizzy fuckery of hair
Hides your horns,
And your apron hides your
Dagger of a tail.

But you pierce the souls
Of everyone you
Talk to or look at.

When you call out someone's name,
Or summon them for something stupid,
You can almost hear their blood,
Boiling in their skin,
Their heart palpatates in their chest,
It feels as if the air was vacuum packed
Right out of their lungs
As they start to shrivel up in your chest.

But you just go on
With your evil laugh
As others wince in pain,
Because you might not be the devil,
But the silent hell in your name was
Not a mistake.

Nothing compares to the hell
You put everyone through,
Michelle.

How would you like to be reminded
Of the worst time in your life
Every time you looked in the mirror?
How would you like to spend
Every single night
Shaking in fear?
What if you dreamed of that time
Or of your fears,
How do you think you would feel then?
Every time I look at myself,
I am reminded of the most
Painful moment in my life.
Can you even imagine what it must be like for me?
Probably not.

My head is pounding,
My mind is screaming-- let me out,
The tears and the pain,
That I've kept inside and told no one about.

Secrets I hold dear to myself,
Secrets that no one else, can know of,
The biggest thing to bring me pain,
Must be deprivation of love.

Words rumble through my mind,
Thoughts and experiences roam about,
The voice inside my head keeps screaming,
It makes me want to rip my hair out!

What is right?
And what is wrong?
Does anyone care about me?
This can't be where I belong.

So i'll wait,
For something to change,
Something that matters,
To change all by itself because I can't,
Because this is not where I belong.

The love of my life was dead,
Not deceased or cold to touch,
But dead.
He died in the arms of another girl,
All he did was become happier
While I bled.
He stabbed me through the heart
With the things he said,
And he lied.
He walked away from me,
Leaving me there alone,
As I cried.
I left him the key to my heart,
Let him open the door,
Then he left it, open wide.
I let him into my life,
Let him stare into my soul
Through my eyes.
He pulled my heart by the threads
With every tug
The more it bled.
His body is not in a grave,
But I was forced to bury him,
In the back of my mind.

C-alling your parents because you have no
O-ne to talk to or hang out with.
L-osing touch with everyone and
L-eaving all your old friends.
E-ventually realizing that it's not all you made it out to be.
G-reat, compared to high school, but
E-very day you come "home" to an empty dorm. Alone.

Don't promise me anything,
Because you wont be able to keep it.
We both know the truth,
It's not like it's a secret.

You're not a good person,
You only live lies,
So was it a mistake to let you
Come between my thighs?

I regret the past,
No more than the present;
And the future has been ruined,
By what you represent.

You took it all from me,
My heart, soul, and peace of mind,
I was left with less than nothing,
The night we were first intertwined.

Every day since then,
I've been spiraling down,
r-e-g-r-e-t,
Is the only thing I can think about.

But is regret the right word,
Or was it all just a mistake?
I gave you everything you wanted,
And all you did was take, take, take.

I'm upset with myself
And I'm upset with us,
For being so stupid,
Just out of lust.

I mean, love.

I like to watching my blood
As it oozes out of my veins.
I like to watch myself suffer,
At so much, as the sound of your name.

I watch the blade
While it enters my skin.
The skin splits open,
And the steel knife sinks in.

My veins open up,
Like the Red Sea,
And blood pours out
All over me.

The more I stab,
The more numb I feel,
Good thing I have a knife
Beside me at every meal.

The deadness of my body and soul
Is quite clear to see.
I like stabbing myself because it feels good
Compared to the pains you've caused me.

As I sit there on the floor of my shower, Letting the water that's pouring over me turn from hot to chilling cold, I hope the water can hide my tears. I hope it will wash away the faint pink lines that cover my arm. But most of all I hope the hours spent curled up, there, on the shower floor will wash away the pain.
I don't mind seeing those faint pink lines across my arm every so often, They help to remind me of all the battles I've fought, Though they are the remnants of the battles that I lost. Those battles have shaped me physically and emotionally. But those battles brought along struggle, Struggles that people who aren't facing them don't understand, Impossible to explain to someone who hasn't been through it all already, Struggles that bring along pain worse than any physical pain imaginable.
That is the pain I wish to be cleansed of.

The weight on my shoulders,
The pressure on my spine,
I was pulled from the wreckage,
Lucky to be alive.

But am I really lucky?
What is there for me to live for?
The guilt, pain, being a burden,
And others, always expecting more?

My body aches and cracks,
Like I am old and frail,
But I'm just a kid, a teenager,
With a few loose nails.

******* up and odd,
I had my whole life planned out,
But once I was pulled from the wreckage,
Those plans have turned to doubts.

We're coming to an end,
We'll soon have a new beginning,
But as of right now,
It's we that are ending.

It's been forever,
Four painful and tiring years,
But in that time,
It's you that shed no tears.

I was broken,
I spent everyday crying,
I got so sick,
I ended up in the hospital, dying.

But you didn't care,
No, you just kept on with your life,
I don't stop thinking about you,
But you haven't thought about me twice.

You ended it,
And cut me out of your world,
Then three days later,
You were onto another girl.

It's been a long four years,
But that time has finally come to end,
And look,
We still have loose ends, that we never got to mend.

So long, my love,
Though you've forgotten I exist,
See you in the next four years,
I wish against it, but that's the plot twist.

If you knew that I stayed up late
Every night, thinking about you,
Thinking about us
Would that change anything?

If you knew that I have changed,
In more ways than one,
To try to hold onto you,
Would that matter to you?

If you knew that every night,
I hold a knife to my wrist,
Thinking about what we could have been,
Would that make you feel anything?

If you knew that I spend
Hours crying over you,
And everything we were,
Would you care, then?

Doesn't matter.

If you knew how many nights
I spent, drinking away my sorrows;
Blues that you caused,
Would you start to give a ****?

If you knew the things I've done,
The people I've been with,
The places I'd been,
If you knew, would anything change?

This person is confusing,
They're difficult to read,
Difficult for me to understand,
This person is me.
I don't know what I strive for,
If I did, I wouldn't know why,
I confuse myself a lot,
More than half the time.
Most people have goals,
Or something to look forward to,
I just live in the moment,
And I always have something to do.
I never understand me,
I don't think anyone does,
People just pretend,
Their reason, "just because".
I have no reasons for anything,
I don't ever know "why";
Just one day I'll be living,
And the next I'll die.

I breathe you in
Like the chemicals I inhale,
In a sad attempt
To forget you.

The thought of where
Your hands used to be,
Wrapped around my waist,
Now feels so ghostly.

I hear your laughter
Ringing through my mind,
Cluttering my thoughts,
Thoughts of when we were intertwined.

I cant wait to be gone,
So I never have to see you again.
I can remove you from my life,
And delete you from my brain.

Your existence ****** me off,
Because you've made me suffer for years,
And meanwhile, you've moved on
And never once shed a tear.

How could you be so selfish and rude,
So self absorbed to not give a ****.
Hurting people that you love,
The very people that love you.

I cant wait to be gone,
So I never have to see you again.

I just wish for once, that someone would care about me even half as much as I care about them.
Just once. I just need to know what it feels like to be loved so much by one person.
Someone.
Anyone.
I cry myself to sleep, waiting for the day that someone truly can show just how much they care about me.
Prove to me that they actually give a ****.
Until then, ill be lying here, crying.

Looking down at my hands,
I can see the power they hold,
The ability to show strength,
Or bring pain to the body, mind, and soul.

As I stare at my hands,
The makers of pain,
I wish to myself,
That those scars weren't the same.

As if I didn't feel
Mentally disfigured enough,
Now physical deformities
Brought upon me too;
I've had enough.

I can’t stand how I look,
I hate the way I feel,
I can’t take the judgment,
It’s too personal and real.

I feel like my brain is imploding,
It’s quickly shutting down.
I can’t help it
But my brain’s first reaction
Is to block out all sight and sound.

I watch those faint markings
As they dance around my hands,
They remind me of who I was
And where I've been,
But not who I am.

Those markings resemble
The battles I've lost;
I always tried to win,
I've always put up a fight
Regardless of the eternal cost.

Those lines and patterns,
They show where I've come from,
But not where I’ll go,
But then again,
At this point,
Who really knows.

I thought you would be sobbing when I was gone,
Little did I know that I would be the one
Broken and torn down;
Overwhelmed by everything all around.
Forced to face the fears
That I've had my whole life,
To think this misery could all be taken away
With the stroke of one kitchen knife.
A blade. Jagged on one side like my personality,
Face down in the kitchen drawer-
Let everyone see the smooth side of me,
It's almost appealing.
But it's still a knife,
And the thoughts of its uses
Gives me chills,
But sends others reeling.
Numb. How I wish to spend most nights,
If not caused by a knife
Then some substance or alcohol
Or maybe pills- and being propped up against a wall.
No one would notice-
If I was gone and missing for days,
My seat would be empty in class,
My rotting corpse in my room, but no one would notice.
Cold, chilling thoughts roam my mind,
Masterpieces I create in my head,
Leave me up late wondering,
"What would the world be like, if I was dead"?

Broken and battered,
With a heart that's no better,
You stretched out my heart-strings,
And now they're all tethered.

People call me independent,
But I see it as alone,
I made my heart a place
For you to call home.

But you destroyed it,
You made a mess of the place,
And all the distress you have caused me,
Can be seen on my face.

You were always welcome,
And you took advantage of that,
You nested yourself in my heart,
Like a little burrow for a rat.

You scratched and clawed,
But I never kicked you out,
You were always welcome,
And you still are, without a doubt.

You see, it was love, real love,
That's what I felt for you,
You said you loved me,
But that was a lie too.

Bottled up.
Sealed inside.
I cry out
Like the ocean at high tide.
Secrets are boiling,
Boiling inside me.
Hot air lifts me up,
I dont have enough gravity.
I just want to combust
And the colors of this secret
Be vividly spread throughout,
Though if that happened, I'd have regrets.

If you have too much ***,
You're a ***** and a ****,
If you don't have ***,
You're a liar or a baby, what?
Losing your virginity,
Is something you only do once,
If you do it too late or early,
You're a dunce.
Society pressures us
All differently,
But honestly, I'd rather be a *****
Than a "liar baby".

I like to see my blood
Flow out of my veins,
Onto the floor.

As the puddle gets larger,
It spreads out,
Flowing from my arm; more and more.

I can't explain
The joy it brings me,
To watch myself in pain.

To show you,
That you have won,
And I have nothing left to gain.

Does it make you feel powerful,
To make others
Feel so weak?

You push us all further down,
In a sad attempt
to reach your own peak!

I can't believe I fell
For your stupid,
Little game.

You'll play it on
Another girl,
And she'll do just the same.

Because you always win,
At the games
That you create.

But in the end,
It's you,
That all the girls will hate.

The real world is a bitter cold place
With a heart made of stone
Not built for those of us just stepping into it
Blindly.

There isn't time to breathe,
All you do is work, and stress, occasionally taking a moment;
Simply a single instant of your time,
To blink.

Well, there is a difference, my friend, in know the societal norms,
And being shoved head-first into the whirlpool of life,
Only to get ****** into the hell of our
Society.

That feeling is full of terror, fright, and tears.
So I must take the occasional instant of my time,
To blink away the tears,
And continue on.

We slip and get back up, yes,
But the bridge between childhood and adult hood does not exist,
It's the leap of faith that forces you to grow up in an instant,
Face the fear of falling millions of miles to your death, and go for it anyway,
And fly.

The salt in my tears
Stings my open cuts,
As every tear falls,
I get pains in my gut.

These wounds don't heal,
Because I keep cutting deeper,
I would see a therapist,
But this is much cheaper.

The pain in my eyes,
Should explain it all,
Sometimes we fall in love,
Other times we just fall.

"Turn around,
Shut your mouth,
Sit up straight,
Don't look around.
Be a lady,
That's not ladylike,
Don't dress that way,
You look like a ****.
Hold your chin up,
That's not high enough,
Now that's too high,
Don't make this tough.
Just do things right,
Won't you learn,
Do it perfect,
Or you shall burn.
Don't let this scare you,
Just be proper,
If your eyes get red,
Use the eye dropper.
Brush your teeth,
And brush them well,
If they aren't white enough,
You'll go to hell.
Comb your hair,
Get all the knots out,
Just listen to me,
And I won't have to shout.
Just be pretty,
Just be perfect,
It's not that hard,
And it's definitely worth it.
No one likes,
Girls with braids,
Or buns, or ponytails,
Those aren't cool these days.
Powder your face,
Oily skin is a no-no,
Leave your face bare,
And you'll look like a hobo.
Stay in fashion,
And in style,
And you'll fit in,
For a while.
Until they notice your personality,
Sad as it may be,
You need to be different than yourself,
Heck, be more like me.
The more alike we all are,
The better it will be,
Because we'll stop being, him and her,
And we'll start being we."

Everytime a blade enters my bloodstream,
I feel closer to you.
Not because of anything else, more than the fact that
You hurt me.
The cold blade, like your cold words, cuts into me;
Blood pouring out.
And in the same way as before, I bleed and ache;
I am hurt.
My blood, warm as my love was for you,
And you don't care.
I can only imagine our happiness now,
I can no longer feel it.
Same too with my image of you, it is going, fading
Behind my cloudy eyes.
Its okay though dear, because I am now weak,
I am cold like your heart.
And no matter what you said or will say,
You can't tear us apart.
Because I will always love you.

Because sometimes she wishes
Her heart would stop beating
And her lungs stop breathing
All at once...

Everyday she got yelled at,
Though she never knew why,
But nothing ever changed,
And she started to cry.
The shouting got worse,
She'd hold back tears; she'd try,
But everyday got harder,
And she started to cry.
Thee bruises she had,
Made others wonder why,
She kept to herself,
And she started to cry.
All the screaming and yelling,
She was lonely and shy,
With no one to call out to,
She started to cry.
Everyday got worse,
She wanted to die,
She hated going home,
And she started to cry.
Broken bones, scratches, bruises, and scars,
Everyone saw them, but no one asked why,
She had been so strong but was now so weak,
And once in heaven, she no longer cried.

When
        All
My memories
        Of you
Are gone,
        That
Is when
        I
        Will
        Move on.

I was falling for you,
I was falling in love,
You were so perfect,
The kind we all dream of.
I felt weightless around you,
I felt too light by your side,
Being with you gave me a high,
But you'd bring be back down with arms open wide.
I was blind to your imperfections,
Things others saw with ease,
Maybe someone could have shown me,
And maybe you wouldn't have left me with these;
A bunch of little pieces,
Pieces of my heart,
My heart was a tower of cards,
And you made it fall apart.
So was I in love with you?
Without a doubt,
Did you, though, love me too?
No, you had spent it all, and you were out.
I had an overabundance of love for you,
You however, did not as well comply,
I said I loved you and meant it,
But when you said "I love you" it was just another lie.

If I could put myself into your shoes,
Absorb the hurt and the blues you're going through,
Then give back your shoes,
All clean from pain,
Just so you wouldn't have that agony,
I would do it.
If I could trade all the good things in my life,
For all the bad in yours, I would trade them,
So that you could live happily,
Yes, I would do it.
If I could trade my life, for your happiness,
I wouldn't hesitate to make that offer,
In an off, pulsating, heart-beat, I would trade everything I am
For you to be happy, because,
You see,
That's all I want.
And I would do it.
This isn't some sort of mockery,
Or "want to be" love poem,
But the truth behind my loving friendship for you,
Whether you see it or not,
I'd give up my last breath,
So you could smile one more time,
Yes, I would do it.
It's in moments like these,
Where I contemplate the entirety of my existence,
Because I would end my world,
For you to have an exciting and happy life,
Don't question that, because,
Yes, I would do it,
But is that the right mindset?
Giving up everything you have, life included,
For the betterment of someone else?
I feel I'm at the point of choosing,
The betterment of someone else,
Over the betterment of myself,
And believe me,
I would do it.
You're the axle of my world,
Part of the reason my world is spinning,
There isn't anyone else I'd want
Pulling on my heart-strings,
Which is why, I'd give it all up for you,
I want you to know this, because,
I truly mean every word I say, and,
I would do it.

For my birthday
You got me
A razor blade
Necklace.

The shower floor is my temple,
A sanctuary for thought,
After an icy cold shower,
I turn the handle to scalding hot.
I let the steam melt my mascara,
Black lines trickle down my face,
But which side will reach my chin first?
Every day it's a race.
As I sit there, weeping,
On the grimy shower floor,
I ask myself what I'm doing with my life,
And wonder if theres someone I want more.
I think of you at first,
But then I think of them,
I wonder what she'll think;
Though I know she'd rather me chose him.
What other people think
Or do, shouldn't concern me,
It's just so **** hard for me to figure out
Who it is I will chose to please.
I know, I know,
You've been here all along,
But maybe it wasn't you,
Maybe I'm the one that's wrong.
This shower floor has got me thinking,
There are many paths to chose from,
The problem is there are so many,
And I only want the right one.

I fell so hard for you,
And you just let me fall.
I was in love with you,
I was in love with it all.

From your first "hello",
To your last "good night",
I was in love with you,
And it all felt right.

Looking back;
I knew I was in love,
You were my last thought before sleeping,
And my first when I woke up.

The way you smiled,
And talked, and walked,
The way you held my hand,
And got us lost in the dark.

It was all perfect,
Just right, to say the least,
I couldn't imagine my life without you,
But it all happened so fast and those moments ceased.

I miss the way you looked into my eyes,
And how you kissed me good night.
I miss the love we once shared,
The love that always felt so right.

And now you got my heart hurting,
From spending all night with those memories.

A text message that reads,
"I need you. Please help me."
Sends you back to me
Quicker than anything.
This isn't a love poem about
How I lost the love of my life,
Begged for them back and
They came back to me.
This is about a friend.
Someone who cares about me,
And puts me before them self.
This is about a best friend.
I try to blink away tears,
But they keep rolling down my face.
You call me in an instant,
As soon as you get my text,
I'm balling, trying to hold myself back
And you, in an eleven minute and twenty three second conversation,
Talk me out of what could have been.
From the darkest places I have been,
I would like to thank you
From the bottom of my heart,
Because if it weren't for you,
I wouldn't be alive today,
To write this.

You are kerosene,
I am a match,
Ill burst into flames,
With one small scratch.
You douse me in yourself,
You cover my every surface,
Now im a wet match,
And wondering my purpose.
I begin to think of
All the problems you create,
Strike me against the rugged box,
Wait, dont do it, hesitate.
Now that's something you'd like to see,
Isn't it?
My match set ablaze,
You can watch me burn
In a fiery daze.

I'm broken
And bruised,
I'm lost
And wandering,
Looking for help,
Pondering
What I would say
To you,
If you were here.
Would I tell you,
"I miss you",
"I ******* up",
"I love you, my dear"?
Or would I face the fact,
That you left me,
With no intent
Of coming back?
I don't know.
They say,
"Only time can heal",
Yet it's been three years,
So why does this all still feel real?
Maybe time doesn't heal everything,
Maybe some of us just can't be healed,
Maybe we were meant to be broken and never fixed,
Maybe. But who can tell?

You're supposed to care,
So when you want to start,
Ill be waiting here;
Waiting for you to give a ****,
About your own flesh and blood.
As everday goes on,
I lose hope more and more
That you'll ever care.
But you've clearly proven
That you never have and never will,
So why do I even bother?

Sitting in the cold doctors office,
She awaits test results,
While sitting in nothing but a cheap gown,
With one tie in the back.
She sits on top of the examination table,
Feeling her legs cover with goosebumps,
And her heart thumping in her chest.
She clenches her fists and releases
To let out some anxiety that she has
About what this means for her future.
She shivers as a chill rushes down her spine,
The small hairs on her arms, back and neck stand up,
She slouches as if she is folding into herself,
When a light knock at the door
Straightens her spine to the fullest,
And the doctor walks in...

I want to be remembered.
I feel like it's so generic to say,
But my biggest wish is to be known
After my death;
And for people to wish that
They had the opportunity to meet me,
Have a conversation with me,
And really get to know me as a person.
I want to be accomplished,
Rather than a pile of ash
After death.
I want people to search my name
Looking for a biography online,
I want people to write reports about me
And read books about my life.
I don't want fame and fortune
During my lifetime,
But I want the knowledge of
Being acknowledged and remembered
Well after I am gone.
The wish is the easy part,
Making it happen...
That's a different story.

This society disgusts me.
It's not just the one I live in,
But the entirety of the world.
Not to blow things out of proportion
But really, we're all just dramatic,
Attention ******, that need a reason to stand out.
People claiming they have a disorder
As severe as depression to spark interest.
Not to be an insensitive, *****, but
"Sorry you went through a break up; get over it".
Don't get me wrong, it's not okay to just tell people to
"**** it up", but I first hand know how they feel.
Time will mend your "broken heart",
It's not even broken, just slightly scratched.
So grow up, and get over yourself,
You're not that cool, and you don't stand out,
Oh yeah, except as a stuck up, conceited, *****.

I don't know if you're there,
I don't know if you're there at all,
But I feel like you do
In those moments right before you fall.
The ground crumbles beneathe you,
Your stomach drops to your knees,
Your entire world is falling apart,
You're screaming for help, somebody please!
No one comes to the scene,
No one rushes to your side,
In these moments before you fall,
You're left alone to die.

Heavy eyelids,
The lull of a fan,
A dark room,
But not pitch black.
There is a light on in the hall,
And the door is open a crack.
Every second feels like an eternity,
As she slowly starts to drift off.
Darkness surrounds her,
She feels her body sinking into the mattress,
The blankets around her seem enveloping.
Her head rests gently on the pillow,
But at the same time, sinks into the pillow,
As if she is sinking into quick sand.
Her brain keeps going,
She falls quickly into a deep sleep,
Forgetting everything that happened that day.
Her back, which ached, is now being put to rest,
Her body gets a break from everything,
But her mind keeps going.

If I drank once for every instant I thought about you,
I'd be a drunken fool, living in a permanently drunken world.
If I raised my cup every time I thought about you,
My glass would be so high, and never come down.

If I took a hit for every memory of you flowing through my brain,
I'd be so high, I couldn't breathe from all the smoke.
If I rolled a blunt for every memory of you on my mind,
My fingers would be sore, never getting a chance to heal.

Little would you know that those drinks have been drunk,
My glass is always raised, and on the same days,
My lungs get smoked out, with a high that lasts forever;
And those blunts have been rolled and still are being rolled.

But don't worry, maybe one day I'll stop; but probably never.
I can't stop thinking of that moment, when you made that promise,
The one about you and me, and "forever".

As I sit here in silence,
Waiting, waiting, waiting,
Hoping to write about something new,
Or at least, something that's not you.
I hear nothing,
The silence is piercing,
But my brain is ringing with the sound of your name,
It's hurting my head, and is causing me pain.
I just want to move on,
I wish for new beginnings,
But you have become the center of my world,
And I am, for you, just another girl.
Help me move on,
Get out of my head,
I want you out of my heart,
Because you're tearing me apart.
But it's not a tear
That you get after
Constantly folding a piece of paper before
Ripping it.
It's more like a tear,
Jagged and rough,
With angled ends,
And no way to mend it.
Because of you,
That is what I have become.

Stronger than any mountain,
With a heart twice that size,
A little rough around the edges,
But I'm so glad she's alive.

Life shoves her to the ground,
But she picks herself up,
She's so strong, though she feels
No stronger than a paper cup.

I can't imagine my life,
Without her daily inspiration,
Shake off the dirt, pick yourself up,
No time for hesitation.

She tells herself, I can do it,
To make it through every day,
She is an inspiration to many,
Because she will never give way.

She's been through so much,
And not too many are aware,
Dealing with pains, that for some of us,
Would be too hard to bear.

She never gives up on us,
She is the rock that holds us steady,
Because, no matter what life throws at her,
She will always be ready.

People always say,
"I'm sorry for your loss",
And, "They're in a better place now".
But really, a person that
You were close to is gone,
Not just temporarily, no,
They are dead.
Deceased, dead, passed away,
Kicked the bucket,
Death, gone, angelic,
In heaven, with the Lord,
However you want to put it,
They are gone, and they aren't coming back.
They may have died of natural causes,
Or maybe had a heart attack,
Maybe they had a rare condition,
Or maybe their heart was full of plaque.
Maybe they were killed
By someone with a heart of stone,
Or maybe they died during ***,
Their last breath-- a strong moan.
They could have died in surgery,
On top of the operating table,
Or possibly they killed them self,
Stabbing, pills, or hanging with a cable.
Whatever the cause of death may be,
That person is no longer here,
People die all the time,
Everyone we know will soon disappear.