I just want to be remembered.
I just want to hear my name be spoken when I can no longer speak myself. Me. Me. Me. Me and you. You and I.
I just want someone to cry, pressing their phone to their ear, listening through the ringing, listening to the beep, listening to the voice mail. Listening to my voice. Again. Another round. Beep. Just one more time. I’m not here right now but you can leave me a message.
I just want someone to get on their knees, beg for me, please come back; you can’t be gone; you couldn't leave so quickly, so quietly, so young.
I just want to watch my funeral; watch the people who say they loved me, watch the people who say they will always remember, watch the people who will forget me in four months; watch them cry their forced tears over my dead body. We’ll all miss you.
You were always a beautiful person.
I just want to find my name written in the margin of someone’s notebook. Over and over. Again. Again. Darker. Again.
Break the pencil. Wipe the tears off the paper.
Start over with a new pencil.
I just want to watch him crumble; say his last goodbye, say another last goodbye, say it until his voice has grown hoarse and he can say it no longer; I love you. I will always love you. Why’d you leave me? Why would you do this to me? I needed you; I still need you.
I need you here so I can say goodbye. I need to say goodbye.
*Goodbye.