I don't like crying in front of you
because it makes me
feel weak.

Even though all my feelings
and bones
are breaking
just like my fragile heart,
I don't want you to
know.
I don't want you to see me
break down and
crumble.

Why?

Because I know
you deserve someone
stronger,
better than I am.
Someone better-suited
that can deal with her emotions
instead of crying all the time.

You don't want to see
my blotchy pink cheeks
or my tears as they fall down
my hot neck.
You don't want to see
my eyes all sullen
and droopy,
or my fingers
tremble.

You deserve
so much better

than just me.

a.m.

Being in love is something not many people
will ever get the chance to experience.
That's how rare it is.
But that doesn't mean it's not powerful,
despite it's rarity among individuals.

But I can tell you.
I can tell you what being in love really feels like.

Actually, that's a lie.
And anyone that tells you that
obviously hasn't been in love;
because being in love is one
feeling that cannot be described.
It's just something amazing and incredible
and beautiful
that we feel - if you're lucky, of course.

But let me try my best
to tell you how it feels.

Being in love
feels like a thousand
butterflies taking flight
in your stomach.

Once you've found that person
you want to be with forever,
you'll know.
You won't have any doubts
or second thoughts
because in your heart,
you'll just know.
And that's when it becomes
impossible -
absolutely impossible -
to picture life without them
by your side,
smiling up at you in the early hours of the morning,
being there for you when you need it most.

Seeing your significant other,
even being in the same room as them,
makes your heart swell with joy.
And if you think just the sight of them
is amazing,
wait until you get time alone with them.

Every single inching second
seems like a gift,
yet it doesn't seem like enough.
Just imagine lying down in bed
with them, watching their chest
rise and fall,
feeling their eyelashes
flutter against your lush pink cheeks,
or being wrapped in their
gentle inviting arms.

Or what about
the feel of their cool fingertips
against your cheek,
across your neck,
entwined in your hair.
Think about all the power
and magnificence a single kiss can hold.

Being in love
is something i never thought i would experience,
not in a million years.

But now that it's
happening,
I can't picture what life would be like
without him.
And maybe that's a dangerous thing.
Maybe that'll be out to get me one day.
But it could be an amazing thing too -
spending the rest of your life
with that one special person.

The one that
you can truly,
with all your heart,
say that you love.

a.m.

i used to think
there was beauty
in everything that
walked the face of the earth

but then i remembered
that's one of the biggest lies
because
(i'm one of them)

a.m.

Before you, I was broken
crushed into millions of
intricate pieces I couldn't piece
back together

My mind was covered
in a sheet of thick darkness;
demons
and
monsters
that swarmed my thoughts,
****** the only joy
I had left out of me

My eyes
had shed enough tears
to be compared to the
Pacific,
maybe even all seven seas
combined

My arms were covered
in battle scars,
symbols that represented
different memories
I couldn't endure,
memories where no one
was there for me

Now that you're here
I can say I'm much better;
My heart is healed
by the power of a thousand
angels that radiate
throughout the glorious skies,
my tears are saved by the
palm of your hands
and the soft gentle touch
of your fingertips,
my scars are no longer visible
or even remotely there,
only within the depth
of my own mind,
which I now know
has turned against me

But despite this,
I want you to know

(I am still broken)

I am happy when I need
to be
and sad when I am,
and I'm still trying to figure out
who I am
and why I'm here

But what I do know
is that you have enough
faith in me for
every single person
that walks the planet

And that's
what helps me
get along

That's what pushes me
to keep going:

The fact that i have
someone worth fighting for


a.m.