Under the sky,
I lay beneath an oak tree,
Gazing at the stars.

As i look up I see a dandelion flowers leaf pass by,
I quickly make a wish,
That you lay by my side.

In this beautiful night,
With that captivating smile on your face,
That could erase all my hate.

I close my eyes,
To imagine that you're by my side,
Holding my hand so tight and never leaving my side.

Under the sky,
I lay beneath an oak tree,
Gazing at the stars.

I will refute your thoughts,
Shun every word you say,
And break all the rules,
Because we both know I'm already astray,

I get caught up in my wistfulness,
But that's all because I'm mortified of what people will say,
My sanity loosens it's hold around me,
These once unbreakable chains now set free,

Two ends that may never meet,
This is more than just an affair,
It's a story of love and hate,
Lust and escape,

Innumerable times have i said i love you,
Countless times you've said the same,
But now I feel as if it was all in vain,
The flame we ignited burned everything in its way and left us with nothing but pain.

WRITERS BLOCK !!!!!!!!!

In this lucid world,
In this so called haven we assume,
Life throws in lots of challenges,
Some fair, some that seem so absurd,

We get carried away in this worldly fame,
Where only evil resides,
Souls that **** a millionth piece inside you,
And people so cunning that cut out your heart from inside you,

Scraped and withered from the edges,
Old and scarred from the surface,
Blood flows stale,
So painful that it hurts.

He resides within my heart,
My soul ready to succumb,
But I have sadly erred-
To an extent where I've compelled him to leave me in despair,
Stranded alone in this suicidal world,

I lost him on my doings,
My moods and my desperation,
He's gone faraway and I, space bound-
Shed tears and wait for him to come back,
Wanting to rectify my mistake and change things forever,

Told people that I moved on,
That I've forgotten the pain he's put me through,
Though embarrassed of my eagerness,
He should've known he was my drug,
My healer, my decay,

If I die a millionth each day-
It's because of his absence and his ignorance,
Going through shackles,
Pulled into abyss,
How shallow am I, wanting someone who doesn't want me?

My tears like rain,
Shedding and trickling rage,
Pain intemperate,
Severity flaming within,
You imprudent and insane.

He doesn't understand how much she struggles,
He doesn't see the love she holds for him,
He doesn't know how much she's breaking from the inside,
He doesn't feel the ache of her scars-
Or see her lurking in the dark,

She only see's her struggles
She loves him more than anything in this world,
She feels hopeless like she's dead from the inside,
But what she doesn't know is, there's a light igniting at the end of the tunnel,
A guide against her fears.

A new life has yet to begin
The sweet melodious serenades of our togetherness
The never ending and non vacant space between us

It has been a year now
Deprived and dissolved are my feelings for you
No compassion and no spark
Only lonesome tragic nights

The day I said yes
We make our journey hand in hand
To forever land if that even exists

I knew we both are so apart
The distance between us so vast
And there was no such place as forever land
I made a mistake that I'd never intend to make

You promise me all the happiness
You put life in my hands
And say you love me and I believe you*

I regret your very existence
I hate myself for confiding in you
You pulled me in devastation
And now I'm left alone collecting pieces of my heart or shards even.

Underground-
Smoked rings
And ashes of cigarette envelope the room,

Desolated-
And taking a puff
The inhalant sounds of a smoker surround,

Vacant room-
Talking to the demons
Under a faded light as soundless music plays,

Unconscious -
Champagne glasses collide
Wine and alcohol bottles cover the floor,

Heart broken-
Shattered was he from the inside
A break up was it, apparently.

Because I don't pay-
Any attention to what you say,
Doesn't mean I don't care.

Toppled by regret,
My sorrow takes me into depth
Cutting through my heart
And flowing with my blood

My soul torn in between
From needles of haters
And comments from society
Can I not live in tranquility?

Lagging behind
Considering imprudence for the sake of living
Is this life?
Is this how I would want it to be?

Queries-
They fog my mind
Making it hard to perceive
Vague and perplexed, stranded in the middle of nowhere.

I haveth her heart,
Sealed in a case,
Engraveth with caress and love,
I gaveth her everything she longed for.

I seek pleasure in Allah's blessings,
I reverently engage myself in worshipping Him,
Praying with a remorseful heart-
And scarred soul,

My eyes shed tears of sorrow,
For my sins to be forgiven,
I take the road to faith and hope-
Because I am currently lost in the midst of this world.

You mean more to me,
Than diamonds and sapphires.

I don't like liars,
I don't like cheats,
If they're like this to me,
Then I'm not sweet !

Enveloped in an unfamiliar embrace,
In the illumination of flickering candle lights and a nightingale that repeatedly sings in the darkness,
Hushing sounds of the wind and the smell of burnt paper from a distance,
Farthest in my brain I hear hope fighting beyond the bars of a prison that my brain has blocked out completely,
Vandalized heart shatters in gloomy nights and confabulates with my conscience telling it to stabilize,
But little did it know the poignancy and the remorseful scars that have been marked on my soul,
Never ending forgiveness and isolation pierces deep holes inside and yet I survive each night in tears-
Wishing for death to take me away from this atrocious world full of barbarity and destruction,
Even the sky cries from time to time for me to be seen in peace covered in a white cloth and for me to sleep in peace.

I vehemently try to trace the lost pieces of my heart
The ones shambled and hidden behind all the exterior
One's not accepted in the eyes of our society
These pieces, that awoke my soul and once made me who i am
Now insignificantly veiled, as if they were garbage
I try to find my insignia
One that differentiates me from the rest
My ambiguities, my hopelessness might as well be the root of all this lurking
Putting an end to my peace
And the constant rage n war that i so got caught up in
This could be my way to cope through this ghastly phase
All this vandalism and all these changes must stop
For i am the maker of my persona and i am the destructor of myself
I must rise, for its my time to ignite and shine
To once again show the world my true colors
I must embrace it all
Be it deadly, be it ugly
Yet, that's who I am, me!

Hesitant nature-
Seldom do I see you come in my dreams,
As my savior and my knight in armor.

Departed is my soul;
that fled ages ago,
from my mind and my heart,
in angst and sorrow,
chained by the perplexities of tomorrow,
I drag myself to my salvation,

pain is what defoliates me internally,
I defenselessly weaken my strengths and stumble on my own burdens;
stammer on my words and live in my past full of regrets,
for I may have erred;
which is why I am compelled to think of desolation,

since I fear to lose my companions and the people I adore the most;
i am shattered and feel no more,
all my once ecstatic energy fades,
yet I believe there is much to decipher;
to untie the knots within me,
and to mend my frail and lost soul.

I don't care what people say,
I'm prone to what I do.

I am the master of my own thoughts,
So, rather than complaining
Deal with it !

No matter,
What I do.
Or,
Where I go;
You will always be a part of me.

Bit by bit
my faith fled
leaving only pieces
and shards of evil,

The darkness that dwells within me
the hurt that excruciates within me
it all showed
in form of hate,

The walls of my heart vandalize
leaving behind scars and pained memories
it was not me
it was what society made me.

Loving you
is as charismatic
as nothing

The very thought of you
is as beautiful
as heaven itself

Loving you
is as charismatic
as nothing.

My ashen self,
Blazes in radiance giving a finishing to my soul,
Abundant with all essentials,
Restoring with every ****** in the spacious hole yet to fill,
The ghastly shadows lurking behind this personality,
Different colors,
Agonizing and sore,
The erupting heat,
Indeed will soon heal,
But the mended scars,
Will deepen and show,
The dark, rough texture,
The blood running through my arteries,
Suffocation and cold,
I think a lot of blood was lost a while ago,
Having to bear all heart break,
I think a drip may help,
Restore not only my old self,
But also my bleeding wound.

Like two torn apart and broken bodies
They meet with a ******
Heaving for breath and sharing warmth-
Closing the distance between them
All despair relinquishes;
Sculpting a magentism so strong
Of a perpetual romance, unutterable.

An amalgamated smell of iron and metal diffuses in the air,
As blood drips from each cut, a smile erupts the face,
Somewhat satisfied with the pain,
The hand swiftly presses the blade to the skin,
And once more marks another hurtful memory.

I'll forgive you when I want,
Just not right now because i can't !!!

A mixture of emotions,
Aggravation and melancholy,
Audacity no more to cease,
Tendency replete,
Serenity is a chance,
To quiten and rid of frustration,
Inferiority within,
Damaged souls,
Celeste bodies,
If procured,
Prime indeed.

My heart  sinks in abyss,
My lungs stiffen,
And my brain stops,
Delirious is my soul,

Unshaken memories,
Pained and mortifying me,
My life ruined,
But as i seek, i pursue peace,

Such a deep hole,
Dripping blood from this drenched soul,
Cold as ice and hot as a stove,
Trying to mend this scar to heal as soon as he comes home.

Death has enveloped me in its blanket,
Leaving me shattered from the inside,

My heart cut out from my body,
Stolen by a lover,
Hypnotized by his love-
I grieve feeling broken and in pain,
Wanting only to cut off from this world;
Disappearing, only by locking myself up in my own room,

Because, death has enveloped me in its blanket,
Leaving me shattered from the inside,

Now all I see is tears dripping down, merged by my blood,
Iron and salt mix-
As they trail down my arm,
Scars bleed,
Love unbearable,
He has left nothing to hope for!

Sequestered from this world,
My heart aches and baffles in pain,
I had embraced deceit once more,
Because of all the happenings in this cruel world,

At night when my pain subsides,
I feel only outlines of my scars,
These marks cover my body,
And drain pools of hatred,

My silhouette sits beside the bed,
With the lights out I once again carve more depth on my skin,
Blood drips down in vengeance,
But still you wouldn't care even if I died today,

Life has pulled me into obstacles,
Challenges too, that were so hard,
I solely conquered all my fears,
And made my daring self bold enough to face them all alone.

Verse :-

The cloudy nights of December,
I write an ode on you,
But not a very good one,
Heart break,
Hungover,
I can't get over you,
The first time we met,
Boom!
Spark,
Is this how you treat me,
After all these years,
This solid, unbreakable friendship,
Guess that's what people do in the end.

Chorus :-

Revenge ?
No
Cuz that's what friends do,
Cry when one cries,
Die for the other half but not say why.

Verse :-

Deceived and hurt by your words,
Cutting deep through my skin,
Rupturing my veins,
Anger fumes that i break all connection,
Forbidding myself from anything connected to you,
You break this frienship for someone who will leave soon,
For that witch,
Vain,
no i can't feel this pain,
I'm cold and numb,
My heart may not converse and will cut you off completely,
but my brain will always regret our encounter.

Chorus :-

Revenge ?
No
Cuz that's what friends do,
Cry when one cries,
Die for the other half but not say why.

I tried to encase the demons within me
But they escaped and fed on me
Slowly and consequently controlled me and my actions
Oh God i shunned and acted astray
I did the unutterable and made quite a few mistakes
But it was not me
It was because of society that led me to commit such acts and awoke my demons
I was trapped amongst perfectionists and flamboyant people
I was so carried away by what others did, had i known earlier of the consequences, i would never have erred
Expectations and manipulation provoked me
I became so weak that i forgot what it means to be free
I tried to encase the demons within me
But they escaped and fed on me.

The rhythm at which my blood flows
Through my veins
It doesn't reach at halts
Commodious valves open
Giving way
With each droplet
Encased is my love
For he who doesn't care
I feel absurd and doltish in so many ways
Ever since the day you've casted a spell on me
My mind plays tricks
Uncontrollable urges dwell in my soul
Wanting more from you
But you just don't want it all
Ignoring all the love you's
And leaving me alone
What is it that I have done
For you to hate me so much
But then again
I don't have the gut to ask you this question
Because like the love you's I've wasted on you
You will ignore this question
And exterminate this query out of your brain.

Dignity fades-
Changes are yet to assemble,
Because you are still the same.

Discretion in its way,
Still stands to prevail,
Completely off track and totally astray.

My words seem to create no sense,
Imprudence can be seen in it,
Although they're foolish but, not too dense.

Vandalizing all what I thought,
I continue writing in a flow,
Nothing can intrude my thoughts.

Segments of my heart,
Segregation of my soul,
Deprived of love,
My past, oh so cold,

The darkness in my spirit,
Black dots and holes,
Covering the edges,
Dosed by cigarette,

Roughness and constriction,
Devastated and delirious,
Progression no more,
Poignancy affirmed,

Tackling with the challenges,
Tyranny and atrocity,
Spreads in the city,
Gold diggers and muggers on the street,

Under flyers the poor sleep,
The walking dead everywhere seen,
Beggars and thieves,
Murders scare me,

It's not just me,
Its the whole earthians,
Male or female,
You will all feel the pain, indeed.

My heart conversed with you
in ways that I can't speak
my mouth dry
but words so replete
flowing swiftly
sharp smile escapes
because talking to thee
i feel at ease,

My eyes go deep
in search for peace
in your company
i feel protected
my stress lines smoothen
and eyes soften
as our eyes meet
it's like the world stopped for a second,

It's you
i tell myself
the reason and solution
of this mood
my soul lightens
we are like two enthralling
eye gaping lovers
like angels we spread our wings and journey through this universe together.

I pour out my heart to you
With words of love and forever
Promises of today and tomorrow
I try to sedate you with words of compassion
Because I know you're the one!

As I sit and sip a glass of wine,
I think about all the mistakes I've made,
Loving you is one of them,
Deprivation I felt when you left,
Destined were we for each other,
Rapturing was your soul,
Full of lustre and captivation,
Drawing me closer to yourself,
Where, vague to me was wtitten on your forehead, beware,
Zeus and poseidon weren't even that strong to set us part,
Metallurgy and chromatography were weaker than I thought,
Our lives together shone,
The radiance and heart amidst our relationship was at spark,
Why'd you go and vandalize what once we fought for?
I was mortified by society from that day on,
Promising to myself I'd never fall,
Destructing all chemistry to keep at halt,
Never have I moved on from that day on,
Never will I even ponder upon that thought.

Don't be sad honey,
Take my hand I'll take you far away.

If only i had a chance to relive my past;
i would
i have a reputation of feeling worthless and not knowing what it really means to be loved
or does it eventually happen when you taste the true essence of life?
if i had a chance to undo my scars and heal from what i have experienced
i would start by conquering my fear and standing up for who i am
i let people overrun me
i let liars and my enemies manipulate me
and where has it left me?
nowhere!
if only there was still a way to remove all my sorrow or my pain
i know i would exultantly leap forward and take the step of erasing the wrongs i have done
and then making each moment precious by believing in who i am
also, rather than being told what to do
for once doing things my own way
i wanna be who i am and not lurk behind.

Flowers blossom the terraces
the garden filled with a familiar smell
an aroma of love
and a fragrance of hurt
there in the ditch I stumble and fall
reality is revealed
and so is the deceit that I embraced.

Eyes scan the world,
Looking from here to there,
Seeking compassion and peace,

As years pass,
Mourning aggravation leaves the lips,
Expressing intolerable souls,

Atrocious cities,
Vulgarities perceived,
This is what nowadays humanity see's,

****** eyes receive pain,
That stings the eyes,
And hurts faith,

**** and bloodshed everywhere,
Spreading across the globe in such haste,
Recalcitrant belief but true deeds,

Uncontrollable greed,
Poverty and inflation increased,
But no one pays a heed,

Homeless people sweep the city,
Notorious teenagers vandalize themselves,
Thinking less and doing more.

I sense the heat,
Boiling up in my head,
Lots of words,
Angry and tortured feelings,
I have no idea what I'm writing,
But still I'm typing !

Stormin' winds that blow away the lot,
My heart drifts right and left swirlin' lone,
Your eyes full of spark and radiant hot,
Sting my soul and erupts a loud mourn,
In the depth of your eyes I drown,
Lay out and collect my yearnin' arouse,
I feel myself sinkin' deeper and down,
Because you drive me crazy in carouse,
The curves and edges of my heart,
Blood drippin' and gushin' furiously through,
The streamin' blood flows in every part,
Leavin' my frail and withered heart for you,
Pleadin' for your love and bewitchin' soul,
Fillin' up your spacious and vacant hole.

What is life to me?
It was merely a speck of happiness to me
It came along bundled with expectations and mysteries
But ended with deception and pain,
I anticipated the world to be harmonious
I visioned peace and honesty
I believed and saw the good in everybody
But then discovered pretense personalities and hearts filled with hatred,
I believed that God entrusted everyone with integrity
I never judged another on the basis of their faith or character
To me all this didn't matter
But today I push back my thoughts and falter to state that this world is clustered with liars and envious people who earnestly indulge in despair.

Exhilarated,
Astonished,
Amazed,
I gasp as i see you.

You beam a smile at my direction,
Lubb Dubb,
My heart beats fast.
You make your way towards me.

'May I have this dance with you?'
I nodd, confused what to say.
We waltz in the hall.
I can feel eyes boring at me.

Envy and jealous people surround us.
Girls give me ***** looks,
And boys mumble things under their breath.
I'm delighted we look the best !