AprilDawn

AprilDawn Apr 2014

this  Hell
of a  life lived
not so long ago
in the boxing
of articles
you may still need
some day
the cycle  will repeat
as the dust is forming
today
is nearly yesterday.

Spent a lot of time moving after husband died in the summer of 2002 until 2008 .

#dustmagnetmemories

AprilDawn Apr 2014

Lipstick Lies

Juicy glides
across my puckered pout
catches
a curve of light
I’m not really
this young
Or fresh anymore
it’s an elaborate ruse
to ensnare your stare .

Pondering why I continue to use lipstick ...

#girlythings

AprilDawn Apr 2014

Blood Red Rose

Shoots through
the confinement
of its cedar fence
offers a peak
at a neighbor’s
slice of life.

Contained suburbia , my muse of sorts for several years.Joy in the simple observances of daily life. From another bunch of pictures after we got the digital camera. Glad I took the shot, because a day or two later the rose was trimmed.

#roseynosey

AprilDawn Apr 2014

Uninvited

The  dark corners
of my nights
undulate  into days
swallow  me whole
even the starkest rays
won’t light my path
nestled
between
my pillows
a creature
  born of  fear
coupled with
unvarnished reality
preys upon
my sleeping form
to pop
out of my mouth
Hellbent and
voracious
for my
bleeding soul.

The night terrors that haunted me in the years after my husband's sudden passing. I use to wake up screaming standing next to my bed.

#nightmaresthat #becamereal

AprilDawn Apr 2014

Allow No Substitutes

You won’t be
Him
You will be
You
with my attentions  riveted
to the curve of your smile
and the  glint in your eyes
and  love smeared across your face
like  freshly made  plum jelly

My next partner , I always thought, will never replace my husband.
And he has not.

#plumjellylover

AprilDawn Apr 2014

In the Piercing Light of Day

I comfort myself
with the knowledge
that you
always felt
the intensity
of my love
   but
as evening calls
uncertainty
rushes   in
   to
steal the moonlight .

Ragged, jagged early grief.Newer grief.The hardest first years.

#earlygrief

AprilDawn Apr 2014

Flagponds

I can still see
through the cracks
of the weathered pier
  those
foamy waves
rolling
  just beneath
sand heavy shoes
jacket pockets
bulged
with shells
bound for some
empty jar
on a full desk
the winter wind
  hung on
pine-filled forests
   behind our backs
and  bitterly blew
us further
up the beach

Our family's winter time beach walks in the last area we lived together in Maryland.

#memorystrolls