I told you I loved you...
You told me you loved me...
But you never knew...
How much I hated you secretly...
And now I'm glad you left...
And now I'm glad Your gone...
Since you left...
My happiness can dawn...
And now that I see...
The real truth...
That you care not for me...
And WE were just a spoof...
But no matter what you think...
I am fine, and I am OK...
You hit me with everything you had...
But I'll live to love another day...
And to your suprise, I still stand...
Because you can't see...
That you can't faze me...
You're not strong enough...
And your too weak in your own mind...
And I'm too tough...
And you have yet to find...
YOUR true love...
And your Angel or Godsend from above...
I just wanted to tell you...
That I am fine...
And see if you knew...
That I found mine...
And its not you...

I don't think a lot,
but I do a lot of thinking.
I don't drink a lot,
but I do a lot of drinking.

And it doesn't seem to stop
this feeling from sinking,
or my all seeing eye from blinking.

Breifly breaking my hindsight of the future
and disrupting my focus,
but you know what the joke is?

I'm fine with that.

And I find myself finding that,
absolutely hilarious.
So I laugh in the face of the scariest
demons and monsters
that your insecurities can conjure.

I believe I can beat them
because I know they can't defeat me.

I have an army of faith,
swarming and storming towards the creatures
easily slaying the doubts and questions,
hesitations from transgressions
attempting to slow my march.

But amidst all this bloodshed,
I must admit my head
is quite clear of all fear.
Instead filled with knowledge,
and if not that then belief,
and if neither are the case,

faith takes their place.

If I told you I hate you...
Would you cry?...
If I told you I loved you...
Would you ask me why?...
Because at one point I did...
But now I don't...
Now I hate you, as you close the lid...
On me...No on US...
I hate the way you smile...
And I hate the way you giggle...
If I could turn back time, just turn back the dial...
I would turn it back, but just a little...
Back when you never knew...
How much I cared and loved you...
But none of that matters now...
As I start life a new...
A life without pain...
A life without hurt...
A life without tears...
But most of all....
A life without you....

Stuck inside my mind,
trying to find what it's worth.

I tore apart my heart,
just to see if it would hurt.

Analogies and metaphors never seem to help,
because the only one who doesn't understand them is myself.

I know you can SEE me, go ahead and take a look. I know that you can read me, I am an open book. That just so happens to get put back on the shelf. Never asked to get pushed, I don't need your help. I'm perfectly capable of destroying myself with my guns blazing and my lungs screaming. Ready to **** any demon that's facing me so I can, basically, make for me, a little place to be slightly above average. Everyone has baggage, but I have more than an airport and train station combined. That's why I'm make-shifting mine into something like music, that's obviously for you ears. If only you could hear half as well as you can SEE
No sweat. It's not like I expect to win this bet. But, I'm still playing my cards. Because once upon a time the moon and Mars along with the stars could have been ours. But scabs turn to scars after just a few bars. Depressed and broke I looked upstairs and spoke

"I have holes in my boxers and even more in my socks, sir. And this grey sky above is killing my sense of love. I'll put all my issues in these shoes, then on top of you. Just so I can prove the sky isn't blue, we've all been lied to."


Why do you keep running through my mind? Can we slow down and walk? Can we sit down and talk? Or are you, too, eager to become a believer?
"Maybe she's a deceiver come to steal away your leisure and keep it beneath her."

What if she's neither?

I prepared for the fight of my life. Until she held me and began to tell me...

"Tony, I'm more impressed by your tattoos than your battle wounds. Now lock away the sad in you, I came here just to rattle you and drag a smile out of you."

I replied "Hopes and tries with wide open eyes disguise the demise that hides behind the lies to the who's? The what's? The when, where's and why's."
But not the how's.
Those are in the clouds floating through your house, made of the cigarette smoke that falls out the love-hole you call a mouth. What the hell are these halls about? There's hardly any room for rooms. So it is safe to assume the broom can't go in the closet. That's my skeleton deposit, or whatever you call it.
Like I'm in a cage at a rave, I'm a rage-aholic. I love this book but find this page, appalling. I'm uncertain if I should turn it, or burn it. What if when I learn it I find the verdict disturbing?

Merely retreated, I have yet to be defeated. Maybe one day I will actually be able to slay the demons I keep at bay, like I do with all the ones that stand in my way. Face them, no fear. No one stands here, except me.

I am the ruler,
I am the king

I can outright out write any song you can sing. Pulling my pen out of my pocket, I'm unsheathing my sword because I've felt this feeling before.
Like your favorite guitar player reaching the cord that gets you every time like it snuck from behind.
I grabbed my book of rhymes and began to climb out my own grave, so I might be home late. Don't bother to wait up, I promise I'll save us.
Even though it burdens me like a thousand times of gravity,
there is not a place I'd rather be.
But, actually, I'm slightly sad to see that you're automatically having me ecstatically jumping out my seat. What this means, is my dreams are pushed out the slip stream and then it seems to have ripped seams like some chick's jeans.
I can't have that.
So how about you stand back? I'm going to need room to drop bombs...
BOOM
In this mind of mine that you can call a tomb, your face is barely seen like the moon at noon.
Your voice still haunt me, though I'll fix that soon.

Stuck inside my mind,
couldn't find what it's worth.

Tore apart my heart,
and it didn't even hurt.

Analogies and metaphors never seem to help,
because the only who doesn't understand them is myself.

You didn't know
How much I hated you
But now you know
How much I hate you
I hated sitting
And doing nothing
As my heart dwindled
And my mind shriviled
Both sinking into nothing
While my soul falls into darkness
Bathing in this jet black tranquilly
And I'm finally resting peacefully
I hate you for the things you did
Not to me but to my family
They aren't your family
They never were
You treated us so horribly
After our only shield was gone
You came back with avengence
And one by one you destroyed us
Striking each one of us down
And stompping on us
While we were on the ground
Only if our heavenly shield was here
She would protect us bravely
Oh shield how I miss you dearly
I need you here now
More than ever
I can't break the sword
Not by my self, not alone
I would call upon my other kin
But they fallen time and time again
Nothing I say or do pleases him
It's like Im always wrong
But then again
I have fought him this long
And I must stay strong
And try to fight a little bit longer
But when I try it only makes him stronger
And I fight and i fight but to no avail
All day and all night but to no success
And I'll keep fighting to eternal rest
I want to escape
To a place he cant go
I want to go to a place you know
The place you're in now
I'll me there soon just you see
I'll meet you there
With all our family...

This heart is still stinging
And the beautiful tone
Is still ringing
But now its getting louder
And now its hurting more
Now this heart is powder
My angel I still adore
Even though I told you before
That I love you much more
Than you could ever believe
You still walk away and you still leave
I'm lost without you
So I sit and I cry
But dont worry Im not going to die
Plus you're the one with cheeks that are dry
I dont want us to be done
But I guess what I said is true
About me and you
I am the moon, and you are the sun
Even though we look close and near
We are a million miles apart
And what I fear
But it wasnt like this from the start
Why cant we go back to the way we was
Exactly how we used to be
When our relationship was a buzz
When I loved you and you loved me
But now everyone can see
We arent how we used to be
I still love you but you dont love me
I thought we would last
I said it wouldnt be like the past
I thought we would last long
But I guess I was wrong
I thought our love was strong
But I guess I was wrong
I guess its too weak
To even last a year
As you sit hear and speak
Telling me everything I dont want to hear
Who knew this would hurt this bad
How could you do this
Knowing I would be so sad
Knowing I would be so mad
You say you want me as just a friend
What about what I want?
I want to be your boyfriend
But who what I want
I guess you dont
I want you to stay with me
But I guess you wont
My heart was terrified
To ever love again
'Cause it has once before died
So I just curl up and hide
'Cause I hurt so bad inside
You tell me
That we cant be
If I cant tell you how I feel
But if our love was real
Its shouldnt even matter
As my heart lies here battered and shattered
I thought you would be there
To help me pick up these pieces
But as long as you stand there and stare
My anger and love does all but ceases
I need you here by my side
So that I wont hurt so bad inside
She took and broke all but my pride
And then left me behind
Then you came to pick me up
When I was weak and defenseless
When I was just a boy, just a pup
And now I'm a man but still helpless
I need you to love me more
And love me no less
But you leave me alone
In a wreckage of mess
As my heart turns to stone
I need you much more
Than you ever needed me
That why I can believe
That you could leave
Me on this floor alone
As my heart turns to stone
And this anger rises
And boils over with wrath
While it shrinks 6 sizes
Now its just a pebble
But still a stone
And I lay here alone
Lying here motionless
As you close the door
And now I'm emotionless
While I lay on the floor
I sit up and watch you walk out
And you dont look back
So I just sit and I pout
I dont know what this is about
I dont know how you could do it
Or why you would do it
But I just drop my head
And lay in bed
Just thinking.....
As my heart keeps sinking
Deeper and deeper
As my life rolls down this hill
Steeper and steeper
No my life comes crashing down
And falls into ruins and rubble
Because of you I hurt double the trouble
And I fall into the dark
My love, just a faded mark
I'm still falling
I dont know where I'm going
I hit the ground and its snowing
Its so very cold
And the air is bitter and ****
I know where I am now
Since the walls are stone
I'm inside my heart
And I'm still alone.................

His childhood
Wasn’t like most boy’s
He was surrounded
By constant yelling
And constant noise
His mom said she hated him
His dad proved he hated him
Never kissed
And never hugged
Never missed
And never loved
Now he’s a teen
And has nightmares
Of the things he’s seen
From the lack of hugs
He resorted to drugs
Sick of his life
With its endless
Struggle and strife
No one was ever there
To squeezed him tight
Tuck him in
And say goodnight
That’s why this gun
Is on his left temple
And it’s pointing right

This heart though broken it is
Is the only thing that I have to give
My life along with material possessions
Can be stripped without discretion
That was one of my earliest lessons
And I learned it quick
God hit me so hard
To make sure it would stick
But it seems if I learned nothing else in life
But pain anguish and the english language
It's that love is too dangerous
Especially for strangers
I tought you that our first go around
Your head was in the clouds
And my feet on the ground
Now I'm looking down still earth bound
And what is this I've found
Do you hear that familiar sound?
That bird singing that familiar song
Oh I've waited so long to hear this song
Because while its playing nothing goes wrong
You recorded it put it on repeat
So now it's always on
I wish my past self was stronger
Or braver than the moster
That plagues my thoughts everyday
Direct result of learning the hard way
But none the less
I've learned what you tried to teach me
How to love
Not through words and such
But through a kiss
A hug
A look
A touch
Now knowing the rules
I've back to your school
And plopped my happy ***
Right in the front of your class
So you can't look past
When I raise my hand and ask
I love you baby
But what else do you need from me?
Because the thought of you leaving me
Doesn't sit neat for me
So if I don't have what you want
Please tell me now while I'm up front
Because though broken it is
My heart is all I have to give

What would you do if you loved someone...
But they didn't love you back...
You just want to pull the trigger on that gun...
Until the point where body has slack...
What would you do?

What would you do if someone hated you so...
Even though you loved them...
And it's ****** up cuz they know...
Exacly how you feel now and then...
What would you do?

What would you do if you knew how she felt...
And she knew how you feel...
And once her heart you did melt...
And once your heart she did steal...
What would you do?

What would you do if she felt nothing for you...
And you felt everything for this girl....
She no longer calls you her Boo...
She was perfect for you like oyster to a pearl...
What would you do?

What would you do if your world was coming down
And there was nothing you could do
But sit and watch
As everything goes to ruin........

I am the unbelievable phenom
That is the shoulder to cry on
And crutch to lean on
I am still standing here
When everything seems gone
I am the pillar of light
In this round room of darkness
I am the soulful passion
When everyone is heartless
When you have no wings
And can fly no more
I will lift you onto mine
And together we can soar
With the world on my shoulders
I must not fail
I am the strength
To those fragile and frail
But I am not a god
So do not pray to me
I am only a man
Who has a places to be
Things to say
And faces to see
In this world there are strong
And there are weak
If you are weary
It's my name you seek
So come brothers
And come sisters
Come Mrs.
And come misters
I am one of this life's
Few great listeners
So speak to me
And I shall speak back
I will be your shield
When yours is in lack

Here is a riddle
For you my dear to try
I ask you but one question
And please do not lie
Tell me what this feeling is
Every time you pass me by
When you look at me
How is it I can fly
And why when I hold hands with you
Are my feet upon the sky
And how is it you can look at me
Like I am the only guy
That look is the same look
That puts me up so high
To the point where I feel
Like nothing can break our tie
I think I know the answer
So this is what I imply
I think that it's your love
That makes me powerful and spry
But how is it when I'm with you
Nothing goes awry
But this I must confess
On your love I do rely
To keep me from wishing
And hoping I will die
But I want you to say it
So I ask the question why
Why do I feel this way
Every time that you're nearby
That's my riddle to you
Now I wait for your reply

Alas my friend,
we meet again
as seemingly meaningful
butterfly kisses and dangerous pillow talk
turn to candle lit confessions
of past regrets and future sins.

Words whispered in the wind
float past my eardrums to beat upon my brain.
Like I'm insane I strain to strain
them out as scribbles, scrawled and sprawled,
over pages telling stories of painful ages
and chain filled cages.

Once upon a time's and used to be's
are not here's and now's.
But if ups have downs,
and smiles have frowns.

Then fortunately for my dark past behind me
I have blank paper in front of me
and I don't so much write, as

quite literally induce lucid memory with literature

only your mind can see,
in the deepest of its own depths.
More towards the chest.
Where shadows dance
like jesters, dressed to impressed her
with moves so fluent they flow like fluid, I can do it.

Plant a seed the size of a grain of sand and
watch it grow like a Beanstalk, talk
about power. Watch your watch
as the second hand moves like the hour.

Now you're in my time.

So entwined is my mind body and soul
every word I let roll off my tongue
is like foreplay to a *******.
And when I hit the rhyme at the end of the line,
its like freedom.

You sit here and bare witness to my words
climbing your defenses with the swiftness
of the worlds most ******* parcor.
So are your
thoughts that pure?
And are you sure you know how to endure
if they never find a cure?

With a view so obscured,
let me make these words clear.
I stand right here as all of your love as well as your fear.

Beyond the dark or the light.
I am the link between tranquil black and blinding white.
Even having no sight my words grip you tight.
And when my body is dead decaying and rotten,
like our children, they will not be forgotten.
Because words are the most immortal thing we've ever taught them.

» Poem: The Story...
The Story...
written by ~Anonymous~
09:16 AM 8/9/05
Poem Style: none
There was this boy
Who loved this girl
She never knew
But she was his world
But then one day
Just out of the blue
He decided to confess
He decided it was for the best
He called her and said
"Meet me at the park tomorrow,
I have something to tell you"
She said back to him
"Why the park? And Why tomorrow?"
He whispered "Its for the best"
She said "Huh? I couldnt hear you"
He said "Just do it, and i'll explain the rest"
She gently said "Dont you remember?
I'm moving tomorrow or had you forgotten?"
He said "I know, I want you to leave
With a thought in your brain."
Then whispered "And get rid of my pain"
She yelled back at him "Stop mumbling!
I cant understand you!"
He said "Sorry just thinking out loud."
She said "Well i have to go now so,
I'll see you later?"
He said "Tomorrow...two-thirty."
She said "I'll try if my mom will let me."
They both hang up
He sat back and sighed
Then thought to himself
I need to get out what I feel inside
Tomorrow came and he was at the park
He didnt see her
But she still had another half an hour
2:20 shes not there
2:25 he started pulling his hair
2:30 and he started running to her house
He cut through yards
And jumped over fences
Out ran a dog
And dodged a car
He was so close yet so far
When he arrived at her house
Her car was dissapearing into the horrizon
He went to the door to bang his head
But before he could
He saw a note stuck half way in
He pulled it out and opened it up
He slowly dropped his head
A tear dripped onto the page
Because this is what it said:
"Hey you,
Sorry I didn't come to the park. I didn't know we were leaving so soon. I figured you would come by the house if I didn't show up so I left you this note, I'm so smart, anyway since I'm moving to Europe I'll probably never see you again and I just wanted to say goodbye in one way or another. Oh, sorry you didn't get to tell me what you wanted to tell me but it's not like it was important right?

Love,
Me

I never meant to hurt you
Just to make you mad
But it’s not so much fun
Now that’s its all bad
I do this day to day
Lowering you self esteem
With every word I say
The holes you can not seam
And the pain is here to stay
Our love I must redeem
I like to see your anger
Until it puts our love in danger
It makes me feel a mix of things
That’s why it feels so stranger
Our relationships a fragile vase
That used to sit in just one place
But I liked the way my heart did race
When I placed
That vase
Upon the ledge
But I fear I set it too close this time
It fell off the edge
The vase is broken now
And lays upon the floor
In shock I peer down
This girl I did adore
All is silent
It destroyed my world
When it hit the ground
Because I fell in love with a girl
This I just now found
Now I’m the sorry one
I didn’t have one ounce of fun
I can’t go back on what I’ve done
I wish I would have kept that vase
Sitting in that one safe place
Because I miss the grace
Of your kiss upon my face
Your love I’m keeping
But I can only have it
While I’m sleeping
The mist is dead silent
Except the echoes of my weeping

Mischievous secrets
Softly screamed in my ear
Anger surging
And racing through me
Voices no on else can hear
Crying out in my mind
Revealing truths
Sheding light on shadows
Soul cowering in the corner
Afraid of everything, everyone
People you've hurt before
Try to warn me and tell me
Exactly what will happen
If I say only 3 words
Fatal words hurtful words
You know of the damage they cause
And of the wreckage they bring
Yet you say them so meaningly
Your trying to hurt me
And bring me pain
Well you succeeded
My heart is slain
And I feel a pain
Like no other pain
And I still tell you
I still love you
And no matter what
I always will
And you never will
So ***** I spill
Because you make me sick
Because you think your slick
But you're not
All this is what runs through me
And my mind
As I sit here and you tell me
This 3 word devastation
That I fear, so much I fear
As I'm dripping a tear
As you softly whisper in my ear
I love you dear
Tears crystal blue
Becasue I know its not true

I have seen the invisible
I have held the untouchable
I have crippled the invincible
I have done things
That no man can do
But look where its got me
Beaten and bruised
My heart shattered and scattered
To the ends of the universe
Never to recovered
Never to be discovered
Lost for eternity, forever
Never to be put back together
Always broken
To stay that way
Until I hear you say
I love you
Just hearing those words
Releases my soul
Like freeing caged birds
From this torturing hell
My mind is ripped from its cell
That it was locked in for so long
I love you too much
How could this be wrong?
When my heart stopped
Singing its sad song
When it stopped ringing
Because it stopped stinging
So I return to the mist
Who is this?
Invading my place
Of eternal bliss
I wonder so I stop and stare
And who turns around
With a twirl of her hair
It’s you I can’t believe my eyes
I come back and you’re here
What a surprise
A long hard kiss
To express my happiness
Then we walk hand in hand
Together forever in the mist

Sweet sleep slips softly,
Seemingly slowly slithering

-Slightly startling-

Surrounding sanity slides sideways
Smothering senses striking silence

Shifting, searing, sight
Steering spirit swarm, smite
Sinister sounds screaming spite

Stored secrets shine, shattering
Spin splitting shrouds-
Simultaneously siphoning seconds
Spent scrawling sacred sonnets;

Since saints shunned simply scratched souls,
Slumber sincerely scares, shaken scarred surfaces so...

**WAKE UP!

This emotion surges
I'm totally controlled
By these urges
Wrath has engulfed me
Fire is all I see
As my spirit claws fiercely
Through my body to be free
My mind knows nothing but madness
This insanity is the result
Of my endless sadness
Hurled over the edge
Thrown off the ledge
Of clear thinking and normalcy
Anger's flames surround me
Like some sort of sorcery
I put evryone in danger
When empowered by my anger
I become someone else
To the world a stranger
A vicious savage
Capable of mass damage
To any and everyone
That happens to fall in his path
He doesn't care
Helpless or not
Pitty he doesn't carry
Destruction is all he brought
Death awaits you
If you happen to get caught
Standing in just one spot
He'll mercelessly rip you apart
And leave you to rot
So you'll step out of his way
If sense is what you got
If you wish to see anohter day
This is a battle best not fought
Ignore his wreckage
Don't stop and stare
Or you'll be hypnotized
By his heartless glare
Then drop a terrified tear
While you're paralyzed by fear
From there a slow painful death
Is all thats left
So for your own safety
Stay away from him
Until his light goes from dark
And back to just dim
When you see him for a while flee
Eventually he will turn back into me

I want to tell you
The things you don’t know
I want to let you see
The things that don’t show
The things about me
That I hold deep inside
The things about me
That I try and hide
That I hide so well
But now its time
To come out of this shell
Just once more
I’ll try and show her
In hopes to leave her heart astir
Butterflies in her tummy
And weak in the knees
I’m begging you please
Just listen to me
I’m not all they make me out to be
I just want you to see
Me, just me
Not the way they see me
But the way I see me
The way I want us to be
Alone but happy
Where I love you
And you love me

Everyday I see you
And everyday I hug you
I just wish that every day
I could tell you I love you
So I dont in fear
That one day you'll walk away
And leave me like all the rest
And my broken heart will be filled with sorrow
And insanity will settle in tomorrow
So everyday I just call you my friend
Sitting across from you daydreaming
Looking at the auroa gleaming
From your flawless beauty
You see me staring at you
And faintly smile, wink, and blow a kiss
I smirk and kiss the air
You giggle cause you were kidding
And you think I am too
As to not reveal my true feelings
I giggle along with you
Even though it hurts to not tell you
And every time we play like that
It feels like your killing me
Cause my pain you dont see
I just wish I could let you know
How I feel about you
Only if you felt the same
Right when I'm about to tell you
Into my life she came
A girl that can give me anything
A girl that has everything
Now once again I'm stuck
Caught in a tug-a-war of emotions
And in a waterfall of love
And still I dont know what to do...

While he held her near
He told her he loved her
He made it all clear
When it was just a blur
He erased her fear
And kept her life astir
She knew he was the one
He was something unique
When her life was undone
And her existence bleak
He gave her one reason to live
When no one was there
Though she had nothing to give
And her pockets were bare
The love they shared
Was extremely rare
But that doesn’t matter
Because life is unfair
He scrounged and fought
For days, months and years
Then went out and bought
A ring with two frozen tears
Before he asked her
He told all of his peers
He had no car
So he walked to her house
The idea was bizarre
Of her as his spouse
He would never reach that point
Unknown to him
Their lives would disjoint
His future was grim
The driver was drunk
He didn’t see her coming
His life was sunk
He just kept walking and humming
He crossed the street
The driver slams the brakes
He’s picked up off his feet
He’s alive in the air
Until he hits the concrete
Seeing what she’s done
The driver keeps going
The girl slumbes through her door
Never even knowing
After she gets the call
The tears don’t stop flowing
She wanted to be with her one
So she grabbed a gun
Whispered ‘I love you, and only you’
And ended her life too

I thank the Lord above
For all the times
That I fell in love
And I thank the one below
For the pain
That I have come to know
I know it so well
Through the scars
From all the times I fell
They’re the reason why
I’m an empty shell
They have shattered my hopes
And destroyed my dreams
But it’s the love I have
That muffles my screams
I have more love than pain
Or so it seems
Until I’m crushed with this burden
And I come apart at the seems
But my soul burns bright
No one can dim it
But this girl just pushes me
Everyday to my limit
She drives me crazy
Completely insane
And for a minute I feel nothing
Not even the pain
But once control I regain
It becomes all too familiar
I wonder if it’s worth this
And is it my fault
Did I birth this?
Did I terminate this bliss?
Did I do something wrong?
If I did
Why has this been going on so long?
If this isn’t feeding off love
Then what’s it running on?
My brain twisting and turning
With different notions
My heart flaming and burning
With different emotions
I struggle to tell you
That life isn’t fair
And that about you
I never did care
You try to look into my mind
Knowing not the conflict
That rages on in there
The Devil pushes
God pulls so I get no where
Whether I should walk away
Or sit and stay
Is a battle between my heart and my brain
That I think never ends
I just hope when it stops
The right one wins

I can't stand the thought
Of someone taking you
Breaking you, or even making you

Label me selfish
But at least I know what I want

All my 1,000 words
Are short and sweet
But you can't even taste them
Let alone see

You're blind, deaf and dumb
To my 100 meter run
Now my legs are tired
So I'm going to sit this one out

The breeze feels good
But I question It's worth
Lost by the map
There's no treasure in this dirt

The offer still stands
I won't take it back
But the longer you sit
The more it has slack

One day it will reduce
To a coiled wire
Just a another song
Sung by my choir

Carried by the  birds
That brought the first one
Buried under the words
Only ones that burnt them

Your wings can flap
The trees will sap
Your hands can clap
The thunder will crack

What else is new
The sky isn't blue
Only these thoughts of you
Can make it true
So what am I left to do

You're nothing but a lumber jack
Come to cut me down
But when the hungers back
You're nowhere to be found
So as I fall to the ground
I am the only one to say TIMBER

Even though my life was merely grazed
By your beauty and grace
I am thrown back and amazed
At how it lingers and stays
In the back of my mind
Like my thoughts have embraced
Every moment your face got my gaze
So now even if you deem us impossible
And call every obstacle optimal
Or give me the title of optional
You can't take my thoughts or memories
Full of once upon a times and used to be's
And all would freeze if your breeze
Ever sang again through my trees
Sweetest song to ever float on my leaves
The fact that it was mutual
Made it infinitely more beautiful
But with the music dying
I don't know how high
We can keep flying
Spare me the glance
Just give me your hands
And let us dance through the plants
Because right now
I don't plan on having any plans
So let's not worry about forever
Let's not worry about the weather
My leaves in your wind
Let us dance together

More vital than breath
More precious than gold
Reliving the story
I have already told
Again warming
This heart’s so cold
Under this pain
I crumble and fold
Freezing cold
And so cumbersome
This burden
Is a most unbearable one
Until the moment
I see the sun
It instantly fades
My frostbitten pain
And resurrects
This heart that
Once laid slain
Now the darkness will melt
Erasing the hurt I once felt
Now feeling the soft rays
Of the sun’s affection
They are the cure
To this heartbreaking infection
So I stand in the light
Afraid of the cold dark
If the sunsets
And disappears from sight
I’ll be eternally lost
In this painful frost
Of the dark frozen night

Can you explain the destruction?
No?
Then it doesn't mean that much then.
So?

Why do you try so hard to be a liar?
You know just as well as I,
there is no fire.

You're a farce, a fake, a fluke
a sham...
Just like I am.

You've done no good here,
only spilled your beer
and stained the crystal clear veneer.

You act like you've saved someone,
don't make me laugh.
Broke all of the one million pieces,
you do the math...

It is ironically funny,
that in the land of milk and honey I pray for two shots of whiskey.
Tell the devil come and get me,
but, I'm not going gently.
I never met a single sorrow that I was able to drown,
yet, never had a wrong up that I couldn’t write down.
So even though my demons keep following me around,
they don’t talk to me now, they don’t even make sound.
They just lick their lips and then they look at me and grin
while I'm gripping this pen like, I'm never getting it again.
It is almost as if they think I'm writing it for them.
But why would I want to play a game that no one gets to win?
I would like to welcome you to my mind; but I'm out of it.
How is it I'm proud of it and still not powerless?
It's simple, my prowess is not made of counterfeits.
And now it gets people to keep openly noticing the potency of the flow in me is known to be overly, thought provokingly, and notably infectious.
My poetry is restless, so, just knowing me is reckless.

Soft lullabies of the sirens song
Are sang with no remorse
Thinking this could be a trap
As I lay my head back
Worlds collided
Behind each eyelid
While she slept
Every secret she kept crept
Through the darkness of the room
Seeking to consume all we assumed
Swallowing me whole
As I try to keep hold
Of my curiousity
And not let my thoughts
Run off with me
Pulling the questions from under me

What is she wondering?
Why does the rain keep thundering?
How long will her dreams keep her away from me?
When will she wake up?
Where will she be?
Who will she see?

Will it be me?
Or just the reminiscence of broken memories
I fought everything she brought
And I thought that I taught myself better
Yet here she sleeps
As I watch her dreams seep
Into the deep depths
Where her nightmare-ish demons rule
The one and only thing I can do
Is plant the seed and hope it doesn't bleed
It's not up to me what she lets run free
But observing her wishes and hopes
Grow and pop like over inflated balloons
Is taking a tole on me
She's unknowingly breaking the whole of me
And picking the pieces apart
Sticking them back at the start
In my sickening blackened heart

From behind the scars
Her mind and heart whisper to me

"She won't let us tell you
But we're tired of the struggle
So we speak to you while we still have control
This girl that you hold...
Has a skull full of doubt
And it starting to push us out
It's shade of blue is shining through
So we don't know what else to do
We might just let her love you...
If you gave us the chance
We could make her legs dance
Then she would love you...
With no remorse, we promise, she would love you"

I peer upon the closed windows to her soul
And want nothing more
Then to rip them open and scream

I LOVE YOU!

Because I want her very spirit to hear it.

There was this one time
When you were all mine
And everything was fine
Your holding my hand
As we walk through the sand
I look into your eyes
You look into mine
I see love and I see no lies
All is pefect and all is well
Walking through the halls
While they ring the school bell
I say my goodbyes
Still seeing the love in your eyes
Knowing that upon my return
You will no longer yurn
For my touch, my kiss, my love
Because I be there
Running my fingers through your hair
Telling you how much I love
And how much I missed you
You tell me it was only an hour
I smile and tell you I know
And as I hug I whisper I still missed you though
You smile and kiss me
And tell me you love me
The love I still see
And at the end of the day
When I walk away
I can't see your love
But I can feel your love
Raining down from above
Your whispered 'Ilove you's
Floating in my head
I can hear your love
Like the gentle beating wings
Of a snow white turttle dove
I lick my lips
I taste your lip gloss
Its the smae kind that I bough you at Ross
I can taste your love
Now I have all of your love
Or so it seems
This is why I wake up crying
We are together
Only in my dreams....