In a world so cold,
For I am alone,
The stars cannot comfort this heart,
For I am alone,
Not even their vaseness,
Filling the universe,
Brings me comfort,
For I am alone,
They all leave to their heart's content,
For I am alone,
Those who say they love me,
Fall like diamonds over a glittering sea,
Soon to vanish,
For I am alone,
Her words stinging,
As a slap to the face,
For I am alone,
His actions,
Bringing him farther and farther from home,
For I am alone,
The tears seeping down my face,
Unable to end,
For I am alone,
The past,
a wreched sword,
And I,
A corpse at its point,
For I am alone,
A puppet of misery,
And wishful of futures unknown,
For I am alone.

Have you seen my head?
I think it fell off my shoulders.
And along with it rolled my thoughts.
They stumble and rattle,
Unable to be resolved.
I don't know what to do,
When just your presence makes me feel this way.
Have I stepped into a dream?
Im unable to beleive that this is real.
Where has that head gone off to,
Bringing my thoughts rolling along?

Even when we must part,
Even for the shortest of times,
I take you with me.

I can find you in the sunlight,
It's warmth caressing my face,
Kisses filled with love,

I can find you in the wind,
It's gusts surrounding me in hugs,
your caring embrace.

Parting may be sorrowful,
But even so,
I carry you with me,
Where ever I may go.

On this path she walked down,
She found a wilting rose,
Alone in it's sorrows.
Once there stood names,
each containing a face she would never recognize,
A story her lips could never speak,
Unless she first asked.
These names were chairs,
waiting for someone to sit,
But their owners will never again visit them.
She found a wilting rose,
But once there were many,
Blooming Roses,
As red as the vibrant liquid that once filled these names,
Now empty words sitting on tongues unable to be whispered.
Bright White carnations,
Hoping for doorsteps to be walked on,
and the sweet sweet tune of, "I'm home"
To ring through the entrance,
Families would smoother their loved one,
Just for walking in the door.
But the wind pushes the flowers from their chairs,
To be trampled on the path.
She places them back in their seats,
As if she too believes the carnations lies.
The next day a name was removed,
An empty chair stood,
as if no one belonged there.
For who would dare remember a single name,
When a whole aisle stands before you?
Again she left the chairs to mourn their emptiness,
To forget their existence until the next time through.
But there were only flowers lining the grass where chairs once were,
As if the disappearance of a name reminded the others that they too would vanish,
And just like that,
The field was barren besides a single rose.
The snow turning to grass,
Winter to spring.
For the world moves on,
And names will go unspoken in time.
This rose will wither.

I'm as wispy as air,
Maybe I'm there,
Maybe I'm not,
Bypassing laughing crowds,
whose noses are stuck in midair,
makes me want to cry out, "I'm Here!"
but my ghostly, blurry self would never be noticed,
"I want to smile and laugh too." my tiny self whispers into ears that shall never hear,
I'm invisible,
a speck of blue, in a room glowing with golden rays of sunlight,
yet completely unnoticeable,
"I'm here!" I want to scream, but can only whisper,
in a voice only I will ever hear.

Love is blind,
Or so the saying goes.
But doesn't it really go:
Infatuation is blind?
Infatuation is blind to the human heart,
It devours the body,
Curve after curve,
Letting the personality melt away.
But true love is not blind.
Love sees the tears,
Talks through the frustration,
Love accepts.
Accepts the self doubt,
Accepts any denseness, jealousy, or agony.
Love isn't blind,
And ignoring the problem,
But talking through the fights and accepting the weaknesses.
It's not fixing each other,
Or only loving them for who they could be,
But for who they are now in all their broken-ness.
Above all else:
Love Is All-Seeing.

All my life I've been protected,
I could've turned out to be my mom or my dad,
yet adoption saved me from their darkness,
I want to repay those who are my friends,
but thank-you's will never be enough,
I want to help who ever I can,
however, all I seem to be is useless,
mistakes are all I accomplish,
I can't do anything right,
My little sibling cries because of me,
and all I can manage when I want to help, is to hurt,
I'm a useless doll without her pretty face,
I want to bring smiles to those I adore,
yet all I can seem to give is tears.
Everyone tries to make me smile, to cheer me up,
all I do is bother them,
but they want to protect my feelings,
no matter how many times I effortlessly stab them,
they always put me first and wipe away my tears,
wether there's tears dotting their cheeks,
I'm useless and protected,
but I want to be useful, and protect those I love.

Just learning to hold our tongues,
we fall in order to rise.
"Shut up"
a simple phrase said when we're annoyed,
but what of it's consequences?
The last words he had ever heard after meowing so loudly.
"I love You"
a commonly used phrase by many,
but only unrequited love would follow.
So we hold our tongues,
not speaking our heart's longing so that they may mend,
"She'll finally understand me"
we wish for this,
but it will only come after death has parted us,
when her mind is healed.
A mistake made year, after year,
now atoned when a cancerous tissue appears.
"I don't mind that you'll never love me."
the discovery bringing change as we wish for her life.
"Please don't leave us"
a selfish person who is incapable of loving anyone but herself due to a mental illness,
yet we desire her praise,
her love,
death will open her eyes to our hearts,
making her whole again,
seeing us that she discarded,
life will allow her to remain with us.

Cascading light,
Feather's falling from smiles like giggles,
Tall and confident,
Sure but uncertain.
How I love a lie,
Yet lies are wistful beasts,
I cage myself from.
She glows,
He glistens,
Who am I?
They are unsure.
Glass shatters,
As theses shadows in my heart resembles shards,
Or perhaps it always rested there,
Wishing,
Dreaming to become a lantern.
But will they hold it?
All that they see,
and bring the petals to their lips,
Kissing the taintedness,
Making it beautiful once more?

If some one died,
I wouldn't shed a tear,
does that make me dry ice?
If I am angry,
It still won't reach me,
but those who my anger captured still got hurt,
If I cry,
I still feel no pain,
are my tears fake,
If I am with friends, if I do something I love, If I go some where fun,
I feel no joy,
does that make me numb?
Can I even feel anything, If my heart is past frostbite?
What storm even occurred?
What happened to me,
as the years went past,
to turn such a happy kid, into this icicle?
Has my heart even froze?

My Sky,
You fell to the ground,
The clouds rained to Earth,
Sunlight poured out
Until
            Only
                        Darkness
     ­                                         Remained.

My Sky,
You fell to the ground,
And though the puddles belong there,
I find myself scooping them up,
And desperately throwing handfuls,
As if to pick you back up.
But My attempts only result in failure.

My Sky,
You fell to the ground,
But you are still charming,
Still lovable.
Yet I find a knife in my side,
Telling my heart to die.

My Sky,
You fell to the ground,
But that does not mean I need to follow.
Maybe I could become the sky for another one day?

The fluttering of the blossoms embrace the sky,
as they land on the newly green ground,
spring has came,
and along with it the cherry blossoms bloom,
A sweet but short romance they symbolize,
such a delicate scene,
they bloom but only last a little while,
such a sweet tragedy,
yet next spring they'll bloom again,
maybe we'll meet once again my true love,
fate will bring us together.

The world will never forget May 5th,
when my birthmother’s piercing call disturbed the atmosphere,
Forcing the Monday clouds into hiding.
It will never forget how the rivers dried up,
After the months of mourning my coming,
And Jordan’s death,
How within that nurturing cradle I ended his existence,
Before he even had a chance to live,
The twin I’d never come to know,
A name I’ll never forget.
The new moon shriveled at my arrival,
Bringing forth a moonless night.
My birth being the beginning of their war,
As my grandma and birthmother fired their weapons,
Mere inches from gashing each other.
I became the ruin of their lives,
The downfall of my birthmother.
And yet this catastrophe lit up the sun,
So that even at night,
A halo circled the Earth,
“Wished for child”
My future parent’s hope,
A candle in their devastation,
To the stranger’s willing to save my life.

A poet's power rely's on kotodama,
our ability to manipulate words,
They grip the hearts of those who read our writings,
and allure their emotions to surface.
They can shine, as brightly as dazzling gems,
or they could break you into tears;
allowing you to weep with the willows.
We control words as vast as the ocean,
lingering under our reign.
We pull their strings, and the puppets come to life,
hoping an ounce of meaning will be shared from my heart to yours,
Kotodama is a cloth,
woven from a poet's mind.
The words reinvent themselves into the reader's heart,
sowed by the seeds of the poets.
Our words speak truths in need of light,
together our strength is great,
our kotodama; powerful.

I used to stare at the clock,
a sad frown uncurled from the edges of my mouth,
I would fake happiness,
but when it would be true,
it was fleeting,
My friends disappear day by day,
'no one cares'
and 'I'm sorry'
were constant in my mind,
I hated myself,
and thought that I deserve nothing special,
and I have days were that pit of loneliness remains,
Of course it will never disappear,
they hurt me,
they're words are still smeared onto my heart,
the voices echoing through my mind,
Then why did I change?
I have people rooting for me now,
I found someone who understands me,
and wants me to smile when the past looms like a tower above me,
When I huddle in my corner to cower,
my friends lift me to my feet.
I finally found what I was searching for,
and change is helping me to smile again.

Words and Phrases that split the mind,
Chaos hidden from deep within,
Confusion and frustration surface without rhyme or reason,
Sadness, hate, fear, tears,
these urges are random and unwanted,
Secrets buried from the past,
shoveling their way out,
why do these memories haunt me?
Shards from a mosaic,
come together to unleash an image of devastation.

Everything you say is but a lie,
It melts over your lips as if stormy winds were ascending,
This caged monstrosity within my chest was but a butterfly,

The murky waters pouring from your eyes are unending -
streams, as if your words were worth defending,
Everything you say is but a lie.

And I am done pretending,
That what you say could ever be less than offending.
This caged monstrosity within my chest was but a butterfly.

I am sick of forever venting,
to an ear so condescending,
Everything you say is but a lie.

But no matter how hard I try,
To you my heart will never be worth lending.
This caged monstrosity within my chest was but a butterfly,

To someone incapable of spending-
time with me, to your every action I am done assenting.
Everything you say is but a lie,
This caged monstrosity within my chest was but a butterfly.

These thoughts of mine are long harbored unseen,
Shall never be mine to forever keep,
Opened by poems, shared for others to see,
When they are read, they slither and they creep,
Into the hearts of those who view these words,
These feelings of mine are universal,
Shar’d between all, from heroes to cowards.
And repeated often through rehearsal.
Echoed throughout time, understood by all.
Uncontained, as they dance throughout all hearts,
Finding lingering pieces to enthrall.
Only to pierce straight through, thrown like a dart.
This is how a poet can change your view,
Keeping this to heart, I bid you adieu.