Words Vanishing,
Thoughts Melting,
Vision Blurring,
Mind Racing,
Heart thumping,
Love Unending,
How can I express these feelings?
How can I put my thoughts to light,
And my feelings to life?
Do you know my love?
Do you even know,
What you do to me, my sweet?

it echoes loud and clear,
a thunderstorm passing by.
reverberating within my mind,
bringing with it flashes of confusion,
bolts of newfound understanding,
With it I have lost all sense of identity.
This diversity thunderstorm is new territory,
lands desperate for travel & discovery.
Who am I?
What do I feel is correct?
I'm lost wandering through the rain.

Did you know that I was adopted?
A child taken from her mother not long after birth.
Did you know that I had an other half - a twin,
but they soon died before formation.
Did you know that I live my life by holding onto high standards,
for fear of disappointment and further rejection.
Did you know how often I've been told, "I'm pregnant"
And could only wish for the child's demise.
Or how many times I've heard, "He's in jail, but will come for you"
About so many different people,
Did you know that throughout middle school I cried myself to sleep,
only because of the pain this still hold's in my heart.
Did you know that I hate lies more than anything,
But keep lying to myself and saying, "I'm fine"
That I wear a mask around her,
pretending to be the perfect daughter.
That their obsessions have became my fears,
That all these little things add up,
creating a void of sadness that unleashes at unsuspecting times,
that whenever I look into a mirror all I see is them -
a monster staring back.

What can you do when your eyes want to well up with tears?
When they fall to the ground,
dropping from their plummet?
When there's enough to flood the world into Atlantis,
and they refuse to stop coming.
Rivers, lakes, oceans,
they spread and widen,
deepening their depths as the new water is added,
rising from the sheer amount.
And yet you can't stop them,
your eyes refuse to quite producing the liquid.
...
But now after the world's demise you run dry,
every last tear has been shed,
and none will come.
Or so you had thought.
I've cried for far too long.

Silence fills the room,
the quite of everyone surrounding you living their everyday life,
but within me,
a hurricane sounds,
pounding in my head,
stuttering hurtful names,
drowning me deeper and deeper,
the longer I stay within it's waters all alone,
the harsher the waves turn.
A hurricane dwells within me.