It's unjust of me
to expect people in my life
to match how I write them down
in poetry

Dear Allah,
a lot of my friends have been telling me
That you'll be mad at me
for that shirk thing
and what not
but im still your kid,
am i not?

Dear Allah,
things have been hard lately
im sorry for falling in love
and giving him all
but you know my love for him
was nothing impure..
maybe, later it involved
different shades of emotions
but i really do love him

Dear Allah,
I'm sorry
but im trapped
in this maze
Talk to me, will you?
gimme a clue
No, im dumb at decoding
But you know
i feel so bad
please dont stay mad at me

Dear Allah,
i love my family
my mum and dad are good people
They have Always helped other
are they going to hell too
cause they don't follow
islamic religion

Dear Allah,
im 18
So wont you forgive
the sins i cant seem to stop committing
i get it
it is stupid to look for you
in statues
but what if i look for your magic
in every human being
and try to help them
Would not that suffice

Oh, Lord/ Ishwar/ Allah/ Rab
you are one?
maybe even if my way is wrong
you know the destination was you
so, if you can,
please forgive me

I wish I didn't feel
I wish I didn't think
My intelligence is a curse
My heart begins to sink

I wish I couldn't love
I wish my heart was cold
My words are locked up
A story that's untold

I wish I didnt care
I wish I didn't scream
My nights are filled with terror
A misery filling my dreams

I still love
I Still feel
I still think but I wish it was real

I still care
I still scream
My heart is still warm
I so badly want to be unseen
My tears only wash away
So much to hide the pain

I keep it in so you don't see
The storm that's inside of me

How did I not know
That you were letting me go
Piece by piece
Tearing at my soul
When you pushed
I pulled
But that was my mistake
Because by you I was fooled
And there's nothing left to say
It's not worth the tears
When the laughter is free
By you I feel ******
For all of eternity

I was your second best
But nonetheless
I tried so hard
To win your heart
It's all fun and games
Until someone gets blamed
For a heart they didn't break
From all the ugly words you say
Now I'm torn apart
From heart to soul
Your feeling for me are so small
And mine were just too old
My love was so strong
But only I was not
I loved you for so long
I suppose you forgot
Maybe you knew
That everything you would do would rip me to shreds
And now our love is dead

It's beyond me why you'd run past open arms into the ones that dropped you in the first place,
And why you'd find home in a place that tore yours up from the group like a natural disaster.

Nature has a way of making things work,
Ever wonder why that's why you two don't?

And it's a **** disaster to hold your frame like a scared child-
Shaking and sobbing because things didn't go your way.

Please just go your own way,
You're the child who outgrew home and the overcoat she gave you.

Maybe if you let her go,
You'd stop feeling so heavy and fearful of chill.

Maybe if you took your coat off,
You'd feel the sunshine in ways not even her softest touch could rival.

Don't walk back into the eye of the storm.
Walk your way back home,

Where the arms aren't heavy
And the arms don't make you feel so alone.