about being vulnerable af
in sporadic catapults
over barricade top

or

just
maybe

Dare Greatly
like Brené

I decorated her
with 100+ Post-its
trying to light
a line into my
bloodstream
from the outside

she says blame
is outward face
of shame

that feeling responsible
for ******* up
triggers so much
suffocating heavy
worthlessness
conjoined to past
we push it back
on someone else
as reflex

it's hard to be
in the V

all alone

broken finger reach
ledge slipping
bone crushed cold feet

your rambling self
echoing hollow

((( ... )))

you're not there
yet

but I know
you can be

you got this

how ever much mad I had
was only to surmount
treacherous Everest
of sad

my legit fist?
not kissed
not allowed for
not bloomed

and you want me
to peddle sunshine...

we need real talk
real friendship
real space
to heal
to grow

we both
need to learn
how to unscorch ground
spawn our own groves
of shimmersun

or else handsheld
turn quickly
to fingers slipped

beggars starved
with empty cups
nothing to pour from

you can't build a palace
on top of a landfill
without first

cleaning up

I told you
Fixate on beauty
You stupid ****

from the shadows, the attention is deafening.
overwhelming.
suffocating.
in the shadows, the dark is calm,
welcoming,
away from the bright lights.
spotlights are only for those who seek them.