If we are to plunge sinful deep into the fiery pits;
This room is fully empty imma go with half eyelids;
Ten fathoms deep sullen and angst ridden on the roadway to hell;
With a fist full of soul candy that makes your spirit swell;
And on my arrival I will greet the cereberus with my bag of bones;
Filled with much regrets before I prayed for unforgotten atones;
I will whistle my swan song walking across its grotesque corridors;
While wailing souls orchestrating with me as they try to sing along;
I payed my dues..Well not maybe?but who cares to collect? to come to me;
I have been abused feelings misused the attitude branded my character they see;
Too little too early I am too far young to die;
If you gonna be the death of me that is how I wanna go and that's no lie;
So I woke up wrongly in this ****** up world that torns me;
So let me walk my own ******* fate go ahead stop me and you'll see;
Ten thousand chaos in a heartbeat will rain down on you;
From best to worst art of filleting skin,incisions and decapitations too;
Are you impressed where my words came from so undivine and unearthly?;
Google it quick search! every bit returns a seconds worth of zero query

You left no more sorrows
The shadow of the day will be suffered tomorrow

You bleed it out,Given up as you are powerless
With hands held high leave out all the rest

The Tinfoil burning In the skies as you burn it down the castle of glass

One step closer in breaking the habit,the final masquerade
Meteora the catalyst Iridescent the heavy pain cause nobody is listening

From the inside lost in the echo wating for the end to come
The little things give you away easier to run

In pieces until It's gone no roads left
Blackbird the messenger mark the graves

We are guilty all the same crawling till we faint hit the floor
Run away in the forgotten wastelands a line in the sand

With keys to the kingdom with a good goodbye
Sharp edges papercut halfway right as he say sorry for now in the end

She is not a creator, a follower not a master.
Does it look like the painful wound, but she is the old scar.
Let her see through the Crystal glass,
the radiating lights, the cheerful smiles,
She is a faker love, she knows the vines.
Take her hand and walk through your dark swoon ,
recite your poem and the story of the lonely moon,
And once, let the broken pieces scatter before her............
show your wounded wings, let her be the healer.

I thought about dreaming while
I'm awake;To separate the truth from what is fake;I turned emptiness from pond to lake;I said I'll stop the hurt for heaven's sake!
If this is my hell?My reality is a one big lie;
Circling for 24 hours a day, trying to sleep with just one eye;
Saving myself from freefalling up an empty sky;Just to find a meaning for life before I die!
I am a poet!I believe my words will echo in silence;Like dropping bombs to the ears of the deft with extreme violence!!
I am not in rage I simply trying to wake up;from being trapped in a nightmare every midnight when it's pass three and a half!!My muse is overwhelmed by my demons while weighing on my shoulder;Where I stood up lifeless in the middle of my room, hoping the next day will be better..
And so here I share my thoughts of self inflicted tragedy;Inked with every sorrowful bliss,pain and misery

Heavy heart's weighing us down
breathing in misery pain and in tragedy
crash and burn we both fell down
up from the sky and into the ground

Why so lame and Phony?Dull and Lonely?
Maybe this is what it does when love hurts me
Why so depressed and weary?Stressed and lazy?
Maybe this is what it does when love betrays me
Why so sad and gloomy?Lost and empty?
So this is what it does when love leaves me

Life itself is a one sweet lie
When death becomes a bitter truth the moment you die;
The mystery behind the endless masquerade
Unveils with the incision of bodies lined up for a parade;
Of souls waltzing and wailing at the melody of gaea
Bidding goodbyes for a holy departure in a new world euthopia;
A new beginning to write and live a tragedy inked with sins
The world never was a wonderland for the broken,trapped in misery with suffering and pain in every scene

As she sit on a chair, wondering why the moon looks so pale
As it sits in the sky, with a glowing light to share;
She thought about a thousand stars doing the same
While her feelings of sadness drips down with the rain
Oh how could it be, she said "what am I to the world?"
"If a line is strong enough then I'll scream to be heard"
Her heartbeat's raising holding so much emotions
And her lips are shaking, a silent expressions
Trapped inside,a thousand words waiting to let go
Breaking the silence was harder than she knows

Words are easy to say but hard to let go
When it comes from the heart to let somebody know:
Of how you are bleeding, hating and falling in love
Just say it to the world that is blind,deft and numb;
Where are all the faces that is kept in this pictures
When your brain betrays you with a memory and you're unsure;
You take a moment to hold your breathe just to feel your alive
And drown yourself to save you is the only way to survive;
The lies you made for yourself that you are not alone
Keeping you in misery and in tragedy where you think you belong;
Is a mindgame you play with yourself, a test of sanity
You lost too much grounds to even find a place for serenity

Buried my head and got stucked under the sand
I see the world the other way, when I turn around
Not to see you fool me
And let you sneak out behind
I am hating myself completely
All the lil things I've done is wrong
And if I'm gone would you still carry on?
Our heart it speaks a thousand lies to know
That we both don't belong
So if you are lonely
In your heart come visit me
And you'll see our memories
Of happiness turning to tragedy
And if you are in misery
In your mind come visit me
And you'll see our memories of
loneliness
oh so sad to be
I'm over and done I'm moving along
I'm leaving my heart tattered and torn
This is a mistake we both done wrong
If we are't meant to be then let hate goes on

You took the air from off my lungs
Gasping and heaving, blood stops to run
Veins tightening, fainting fade to black
Waking from the otherside, struggling to go back
With just one lie, it ended just like that
Why'd I believe in you? Surrendering my heart
You ripped it from the inside, like a newborn child
Coming out the womb, with hatred so wild
What I'd ever done to deserve me like this
We can start all over just hug me with a kiss
You took the world from off my eyes
And now I'm not afraid in exchanging goodbyes
With all regrets,mistakes and lies
Taking them all to the grave when the moment dies

Dear Future,
Present may pass
Becoming our past
This too shall pass
The heartaches and goodbyes
Secrets keep you sick
Waiting to unveil with a burning wick
A light from above
Guidance of our God
Will save you a day
To listen and pray
If there's any other way
To fix a broken heart

Yesterday became a week
As for tomorrow I'll be laying sick
The thousand thoughts of you leaving
Lingers in the room while time passed ticking
A day became years
As for the next I'll be crying without tears
That's how you left with a thorn in my heart
Splintered in a memory constantly tearing me apart

You broke me down again and again and again
But I won't back down...
Like I'll never get used from being abused
It's okay I'll never look down
So where's the sound you made when you are around around my head
I can't sleep at night without you on my bed..
Time goes back down to one and I am missing you
Another sleepness night without the me and you
Another cold coffee and the lights are dimming low
So hit me one more time with a bolt of blue
And maybe this time around, I'll see you in a different view

When you are not around, I'll look for you
And when you are found I'll snuggle close to you
I'll peck your pouting lips
I'll hold you tight like this
I'll carry you around my back
When your feet's hurting bad
When you are feeling sick, I will tend to you
And when you're feeling cold, I'll be the blanket just for you
I'll bring you water to obey your thirst
I'll be the best among the rest
I'll be the fill when you're feeling lack
Turn your frown around when you're feeling sad

We are young and so wrong
But we are done and moving along
The order, we suffer
They took as in for ******
We are lost and broken
But it made us strong, awoken
Our father, we suffer
You left us sleeping in the gutter
We are old and the lonely
But we are holding so much memory
The gallows, we suffer
Choking hanging ropes getting tighter
Now we are just dust and ashes
Scattered through the wind in masses
The freedom, no more to suffer
Forever we'll journey on as a drifter

With so much letters written
And not a word is made
With so much hate I'm aching
Best plan she ever laid
The lies as she cheat is growing
My heart is better off dead
But I kept on keeping me going
Till the end, waited for the time she said
'Sorry we can't be together anymore...I love
someone else and you started to become a bore'
That night is the night where I lost control
I went out on a rampage shutting down all doors
I thought about losing her so many times before
But it really weren't that easy, specially her acted like a *****
The day came where she came back begging
With open arms and a tight hug, I'm grinning
What's in my mind is as sick attempt of ******
Only the sufffering is one can bear forever
3 years of silence a masquerade and a dance
Whispering past echoes saying'this is your chance'
Of what to do with my caged wrath?If she is so warm lying on my arms
I am waiting and hating her loving and keeping her off harm
Only to ripen the revenge sweet tasty and profound
And so I'm still waiting..Kissing her forehead and let her sleep without a sound..

You sinked your teeth deep within my skin
You left me here dying, lying down bleeding
Our memories reminds me of my sins
Buried with regrets locked up in a coffin
You woke me up with a cold touch from your lips
The warmness is long gone, love grown cold and stiff
What have we become? a monster of our own?
Chasing ghosts devouring bliss as lies goes on
Between us is a broken mirror with so many reflections
Where none of it are real, a keleidoscope of lies and deceptions
Proving our feelings as plastic fake, a masquerade
With betrayal as our companion marching our parade
Our last waltz as we dance in this treacherous symphony
The melody goes on till' then end, and for eternity

I lost my heart in a prison
devoured by doubts and fears
I lost my way of reason
As the dust it never clears
I lost the right to recover
when I drown myself with tears
I lost the will to remember
Clouding my mind for years
Where have you gone? Struggling to remember
What Am I missing?Why am I forgetting
What have I done? Looking for forgiveness
Who am I missing? Why am I aching
Where is the sun? I need to see us clearer
It's you I am missing! When my heart's stops beating
You are the one we need to get closer
closer together and be us forever

I'm on a bed with needles tucked on my skin
With a respirator that makes me breathe from within
In a coma not aware if I'm asleep or awake
This must be a joke! or a nightmare I cannot shake
Ringing and beeping, the chorus of silence
A melody of my heart's beating without the essence
Life is not a waiting room and here I am dying
So this is how it sounds.. when the life-clock's ticking

There's hole beneath me I can't quite fathom
Until I fell and buried me, then it became a tomb
Holding my very existence of what of my means?
Till' the end, so much questions bursting at the seams
Then I woke up in a dream where I'm still dying
Holding my breath with your air in my lungs, so suffocating
I realized the difference that there are none
Living or dying it doesn't matter just wanna leave and be gone
Off and out of this world far far away from your memory
Somewhere where there's a new me and you in reverse so happy
Together in a book filled with colorful words not in grey
Sometimes I question Love! Cause' it doesn't really know how to pay
Better days drowned along with me drinking gallons of rums
Efforts wasted sacrifices voided into an empty bottle of jams
Where it supposed to flavor the flame with sweetness burning
Not with bitterness of sorrow hate misery and so much aching
Now I'm done writing my complaints for today gotta drift away
I'll bury myself alive with questions of what tomorrow would say

https://soundcloud.com/john-les-phoenix/never-fade-away

https://soundcloud.com/john-les-phoenix/loves-resentment

What's left of our memories fallen in ruins are nothing but debris of mistakes and regrets, a remnant of life speaking the truth that we are far more than worlds apart...The closer we get the further we are

Tie a knot in between
Tear the flesh off my skin
Rip my heart to let you in
A parade of lust in a bloodstream
Kiss the fears off of my eyes
**** the venom of a thousand lies
Rid me off of this wretched demise
Say a prayer as the candle dies
Call me home like a church bell ringing
Prepare a swansong that is worth singing
In every verse and line souls are wailing
Listen closely as they whisper"They're Waiting"

Crash and burn all our memories just died within
Crooked smiles replaced the honesty that we once wore
No saving us, it's too late we crumbled down to dust
All is lost the love the lust the hate the promises of us
I will love you forever till the end of time
No matter what I'll try to keep you happy and feel fine
If I promised a lie?Then am I worthy to die?
I said ''I'll give up my own life
For you...''
On my knees,the world as our witness with a cheap bouquet of roses
You took me in your arms, you let me in so deep
''Please feel free to bury me the moment I make you weep''
I said, and I did and now here we are facing end
With no return,we are lost tired and broken...
If I promised that lie,Now I am worthy to die along with our memories
So long and goodbye love resent me

What if I died tomorrow
Will you cry for me?Endlessly
What if I've burnt this pictures
Will you remember me? Promise me
That you will carry me in your memory
Till the end of the world just you and me
In this tragedy in misery we will keep holding on
for eternity...
The pain it meant so much for us
made us grow aware of things that betrayed us
An intervention that rained down from above
that found us here together tangled in love
So hold me and don't let go
We can fade away tonight and no one will know
Falling up in space
our souls have finally found a place to rest
No one can disturb us here
No one can find us there
In our sweet embrace we call our home
Let us turn off the lights and finally be alone

I'm a leaning tower of words that is bout to crumble and the debris I'll make may worth saving to rebuild a new foundation..I'll keep leaning for the time being and let the gravity of doubts break me down, so when I do I'll learn the next to never let myself fall.. Carrying the weight of the world is no joke when you are accommodating more than you can handle, and the irony of doing so is the fact that among those bunch of people not a soul could give the same **** and struggle you are going through keeping you worthy of being attached..Sometimes kindness is a cancer that eats us alive, a sign of being a martyr addicted to caring too much,an open cage where you lock yourself in, a mirror that shows thousands of reflections and none of yours are even present..Being busy bout what others think and feel where you are stuck in a quicksand not knowing to be finally devoured beneath in your own league, a hero's act that needs the saving the most...

Why does the sun have to be so bright? for the moon to look so pale
Why does the sky have to be so high? As you lay down on the grass and stare
At the faces and shapes it makes as it revolves around our heads
Someday we'll be so tall enough to get us anywhere

Raise it up raise it up throw your hands up in the air
Feel the air beneath your arms let the wind blows to take you there
Let your heart let your heart make believe that you'll get there someday
Like a dandelion heading to where your dreams belong

Why does the earth seems to revolve so fast? I got me riding on a carousel
Why does my mind seems off today? Girl you got me daydreaming again
The times I get to see you, hold you like your mine is an answered prayer
Someday we'll be together and that will go on forever

Look above look above lets watch the fireworks up in the air
Feel my arms across your shoulder let this moment take us there
Close your eyes close your eyes let this kiss mean a thousand words
It's our closest to forever so lets just stay like this together

Would you be my lil angel when I die
to guide me and show me the world once lied
to me when I said that I wanted to live a normal life
Would you be my lil cutthroat kiss
To let me know that I'm still having this
nightmare of living alone what a waste of life

I think that everybody knows, what I've said but never what I did
But God knows that I'm holding on stayed standing on my feet
So stop pretending you cared when you just stood there and stared
I think that everybody shows, a flickering light a false sense of hope
But I know that it won't work I've been that road so many times I think
So stop pretending you heard, me called your name well I never did

I'm going 150 miles I'm ******* drunk I'm unstable
My vision blurred can't see a ****! and and I'm unable
To control my breathing heavy feet on the gas
Horns wailing headlights flashing I think I'm going to crash
God?He doesn't have the time to listen to me now
So I'll just have to recite my own eulogy as a vow
That when I get straight to hell I'll make sure to be bad
Cause this life you gave me is the worst I've ever had

With your every touch left me paralyzed
Oh baby I wish could see the world through your eyes;If loving you is a gamble rolling a pair of dice then I'll raise the stakes till' my luck runs out and dies;But knowing the fact that for a moment I had you is something that I always woke up to like deja vu;I'll start all over again roam the world to get to you coz' your an addiction a habit that I will never break through

Not for this world we two meant to belong;
Together in each other's arms soon it won't be long;
Close your eyes believe coz' we are not alone;
We are among the many in seek for a place called home;It's where your heart is, as my heart is where yours are;All I can do is to wait for a bit of eternity and gaze from afar;I wish I could drift in space with a map to the stars;Even if it would mean a million years to get to where you are;I'll rally a waypoint and sling myself to move starting from mars;Darling it would be pretty if you could witness how I would go;Maybe a simple hugs and kisses with the 3 little words would do;Where the easiest way could be the most complicated to take part when you are stuttering and couldn't even say the words right;It's just the lack of confidence and self doubts that shouldn't be there that made my lungs tight;I'm choking maybe dying and it ***** if that would be tonight;I'll let the angels sing as they carry on with the last rites;But wait I won't die yet not until I'm actually dead;Not until you hear me out and listen to what I've said;It's lame writing on this paper with my heart inking it;Where you are just on a corner?Why is it so hard for me to approach you and speak?!;**** it!!Here we go!I'm going romantic with each steps so slow so over dramatic;As I drew myself close to you holding my breath is causing me to panic;**** it!Don't hyperventilate steady feet don't fail now;****!I'm gonna throw up!I gotta hit the restroom first somehow

Your immaculate touch and warm embrace
Your my shining light my sweet caress
your burning lips and perfect hips
A little taste is a fulfilling feat
Drenched in saline tumbling fingers down your spine
Dry skin perspires flooded with wine
Sip and lick all the pleasure is mine
I am going deeper while your angelic eyes shine
Oh so smooth your skin feels so very fine
Silent cries begging faster and for more
The earth shakes and crumble while we do it on floor
With bodies intact glued together as one
Every shrug is as hot as **** burning like the sun
Only you and I are the victim who gladly surrendered
Till' the moment it melts and spills, a love to remember

With this song let me tell you how deep's my love for you
And with this lines let me deliver the things I'd do for you
now close your eyes and embrace me don't ever let me go
kiss my lips now tell me the desire taking hold of you
this is where we fall deeper in love
dive to an ocean straight from above
This is the place we call our home
we will never be alone
Lets dance inside this song
let the world knows our love's so strong

Weak and fragile, my bones are ready to break
Sick and dying, my heart has suffered so much ache
Fill my empty glass with blood and fame
Just to spill it empty and feel more shame
Digging graves at a cemetery fitting myself in
Where to rest?This body of mine tainted with sins?
I realized damnation doesn't really mean facing my end
For me it's a cycle, another limbo around the bend
It goes on like a wheel waiting for a flat tire
I started hating the sun the next morning like a freaking vampire
Cause' knowing it's a walk through hell day by day to survive
Oh **** mate!!!The pain became a pleasure that keeps me alive
******* monsters hiding sick intentions behind a smirk
Never trusted no one, come close and I'll give your chin a kick
It's not that I'm paranoid.. I just don't get it why I am too furious
About the thoughts of how will they betray me next I am so curious
****! I'm off be back in a while...I am signing off and will write later
****!Believe me these days I am like ******* razors and eating papers

Love is like an oil painting when it gets old it dries and the memories preserved in the craquelure.

Imagine a life not grey, not black
Imagine the sun sharing it's rays.
Imagine the ocean, not flipping it's waves.
Imagine the times we'd be astray.
Imagine the way,I'd make you stay.
Imagine a night, we are together
Imagine a love, we’ll share forever
Imagine me, and you making believe it’s true
Imagine a light, that guides us through
Imagine a path, that leads me back to you

Miss erie she ******* loves me
I hear her calls, her face is all I see
Miss erie she ******* loves me
She's my wonderwall when happiness betrays me
miss erie she ******* loves me
my colorful heaven in hell for eternity
miss erie she ******* loves me
In her arms I call home my sanctuary
Like a butterfly she came to take my soul, like a candle beneath my thread waiting for my fall,
Her smile's like a cancer devouring my all,yet she is the only one around when ever I make the call

"We are all sinners and time will come for metanoia
That pulls us back once again into the land of pleroma
A region of light where we continue to achieve gnosis
The possibility of transcendence in a spiritual phasis"

Only a few are chosen to be whole
And the rest are then thrown in a hole
Those are the memories we tried to forget
And what's in the making that leaves no regret
If you are the piece that fits in perfectly
Would you take my hand and live in harmony?
Or are you just like me trying to find what's missing
It's not always the broken can mend what's already tearing
A saying that would probably get worst every try
One always seek shelter and a shoulder to lean on and cry
When the breaking starts to shatter how can one pick up the pieces?
It's a natural healing, an order that no one suffers an endless stasis
Of emptiness, loneliness and sadness, to many has became a choice
Just have to endure and survive as we always do listening to the voice
Not of the darkness that dwells within us that devours our will
But to the angels singing side by side as you stood on a hill
Where then turn to a mountain, as you build yourself back up
Moulding what was once shattered for the struggle to stop
It has to start on your own to once again be whole stronger than before
Only then you'll find yourself ready to offer, opening up your door

Not far from the dream is a reality of you and me
An Inertia of love a constant motion that goes on for eternity
Together we are forever lost in time, a ecstatic euphoria
We built a sanctuary with our body united as one, our own utopia
Never alone and lonely, fears and doubts has been casts away
A beautiful lie that we can't deny while the truth glimmers through the eye
Love is our domain, our territory...Our own kingdom to rule the ground where we stand
Something profound, essential like life itself where only two lovers would understand
That this very embrace in each others arms a home where we belong
We will never falter our love will go on, A love so strong will never go wrong

And so here I am all dressed in black
A false assumption of bringing Gothic back
Along with a band of angst-ridden youth
Marching down the aisle of a never ending dispute
Among the rivalry of heroes rise a villain who held the root
That life is a one big lie and death is a very painful truth
So with our souls entwine along with love and hatred
Will the bond break between us?And who's blood to bleed?
You wore the crown far too long enough to be dethrone
Let me be the next king after I'm done with you picking bones
One has to suffer and clearly my time is done, I'm blowing the horns
So hail to your kingdom ruling over wearing the crown of thorns

I have nothing left in mind, when your heart is far away from mine...The boredom won't let me think. As emptiness begun to sink.. My words are pointless without someone to tell..Of how you conquered my heart the moment I fell

Rain is pouring, the whispers of October
Dripping memories of what we have to remember
Falling asleep by the windowpane
While trying so hard to forget all the pain
By drowning the sorrow and emptiness with tears
Along with your loneliness, heartaches and fears
Enough is enough no more hearts to suffer
Listen to the voice the whispers of October

From deep within our souls confide
The feelings of hatred a great divide
The unity became a war of hearts
Broken,tattered and torned apart

Like hell the anger burns silently strong
Emotions are overwhelming, a new breed is born
Out from the violence  chaos and dread
Fear is naked through the eyes of the dead

No matter how far the battle or which side the first blood draws
When the dust settles the war still rages within and so it goes
For centuries its been the same through history we can tell
There's no way a side of a coin meets the other, however it fell

Back to back they see different views but same cause same life
Are taken as blood splatters everywhere death will surely arrive
Cruelty is a gift humanity has given itself that keeps on giving
And so as a present.. We open another path to a merciless killing

Calm as the sound of the falling leaves
It hits the ground as we silently breathes
The air we shared as we grasp our hands together
A confession of love, a moment that can last forever
But such eternity is just a feeling of expectations
A dream in a world where fantasy is just a chained illusions
Yet from the heart we both knew that it can exist
If we hold onto us we can change the world of modern myths
That this, you and me under the bright blue sky
Is as clear as day with a love that we can't deny
So lets walk a promise that no matter what we won't let go
We'll get through anything with a bond so the world will know
That forevermore is just a heartbeat away that ticks with yours and mine
Put some faith and even in the darkest times a heart can shine..

I’ve been longing for this
I’ve been searching for you
Every night and day I’ve been waiting
If we aren’t meant to be
Then I’ll gladly surrender
Your love’s like a poison I died

Listen to me as I speak so slowly
I’m dying and fading away
A final breath speaks nothing but the truth
your whispers are so full of lies

The end has no end and it goes on forever
A cycle I just can’t take part
Lost in the moment of finding a reason
For this ******* to survive

Just one more touch and I’ll finally let go
A cutthroat kiss would really be nice
Now that it’s done, let’s start all over again
Your love is my poison for life

Look alive
Don’t stop breathing now
Hold my hands and we’ll fly away
Shine a light
Don’t keep me locked inside
Hold on tight and we'll fly away
And when you fall
Bound by despair,misery and pain
Hear my call
And I’ll take you there, where it no longer rain

I lost my will to write
I hope it's all right
If this paper stayed blank all night
With candles burning out a ticking light
What's in my mind? I've been asking myself all the time
I inked sadness with empty words everyday
Hoping to make sense along with my burdens someday
A drop of salt to each wound just to feel
I sleep awake just to make sure the pain is real
Why so much madness when your trapped in silence?
Within your own walls **** it! All of this doesn't makes sense!
Perhaps I'm losing it! Or maybe I should just let go...
Of your memories move on start anew
Yes! I should do that just so you know
My bed is calling me cause' I ran out of alcohol
This piece of paper as usual to the bin shall fall...

Are we lost? Or are we just fine?
Hold me close tell me where to find
You when I feel like falling out of reach
In a dream maybe where you are standing by the beach
Covered in sand this castle of ours
I dream of you always and it goes on for hours
I don't wanna wake up if it means losing you
I will gladly make that, just tell me and I'll do
Your eyes are blue with a kaleidoscope of colours in different hue
I am so not gonna move from here cause I am enjoying the view
A reflection of me and you and a world we created on our own
There's no place like home in your arms where I belong