"Forward Unto Dawn,
           The Coming Of The New Age
                       Twelve-Thirteen-Fourteen"

The 11th of December 2013 that date is today,
Something about the sequence made me ponder away;
What could be the meaning of the numerical order?
So I seek answer read threads and find answers through google.

So it is the final sequential event for another 90 years...
So lets celebrate maybe get married and burst out with happy tears;
It's just numbers now really, in sequence every 90 years, what's the big deal?
It's just another event a human mind creates to talk and believe to offer life a thrill.

So whatever this day means we just live our life like we used to and forget all worries,
For hope never a day fades with faith and will like a fortress, life is a one big numerical series,
Every day is like a test, a survival, a wonder that everyone walks through since the day we born
That each day is crypted with trials ready to overcome and decode, a gift to be unwrap and to be torn...

Forgive me if I say that you can't take my pride!
You can burn me in hell!Make my soul be fried!
But in the end I know I am better without a doubt!
A narcissistic vanity is where I base my growth!

I envy you in every way!
Why can't I have what you have today!
It's so simple yet so frail!
This feeling I have will always be pale!

Haha!It's all mine!Oh!Gluttony you say?!
Do you wanna have some?Are you willing to pay?!
I'm not obsessed in having or to possess them all!
It's just that I can so **** you all!

Ahhh!My blood is rushing all over my body!
The heat you are sharing makes my hands all shaky!
My stomach is rumbling I'm so ready for you!
The lust I am having won't last till' both you and I get through!

I will crush your skull for not obeying me!
I will rip you apart for humiliating me!
My anger will smite you to pieces, feel the wrath of my fury!
We all are familiar with this feeling, the beast within you and me!

For the people I will serve my country!
This is the mask I wear in front of humanity!
As my greed pilfer and slowly steal all their money!
I became rich and famous!I will claim the throne gladly!

So busy thinking while laying my body on this bed!
Oh there is so much things to do maybe later I'll just rest my head!
I'm suffering apathy sloth as they say that gets into me!
I will change really tomorrow when I wake up believe me!

Today's Tuesday and it's the 31st of December 2013;
A year's end just to open a path for a new beginning.
A eternal cycle of hope given to those with shattered dreams;
A resolution, a choice to be someone new with a passion that gleams.

With the thoughts of the past were we must left behind for history to write;
Now it's the time to alter your fate just do your best to make things right.
For never a moment God forget to look after us, guide us, give us signs to follow;
It's us that sometimes think we are all alone in the dark with only misery and a bitter pills to swallow.

So stand proud and tall never let the weights of negativity drags you down;
Crawl if you must first, to walk then run serve failure as your training ground.
Build a fortress with your bag of hammers, don't let it consume you and start being a whiner;
With a will to change no matter what cards you are dealt with, for once make yourself a winner.

Scream out your name to the night with fireworks roaring;
Held your fists up high like you are holding something burning.
That is the passion, looking forward a brand new year;
A new dawn that for once you will never shed again painful tears.

And here I bid you a happy new year by all means have fun and enjoy;
Seize the day!Have a blast make some noise raise your morale let your passion boil.
Feast and bond with your families and friends just let the good times roll;
For this coming year changes will surely be there, so start making a way to make yourselves whole.

I'm watching me watching you watching me
Through a mirror a faint reflection of us to see
I gazed upon the world of perception
A view of us together in complete perfection
The silence became our sanctuary
As this moment became eternity
No longer the coldness remain
I took a picture and have us framed
A different view of me and you
A kaleidoscope of colors white and blue

I'm a leaning tower of words that is bout to crumble and the debris I'll make may worth saving to rebuild a new foundation..I'll keep leaning for the time being and let the gravity of doubts break me down, so when I do I'll learn the next to never let myself fall.. Carrying the weight of the world is no joke when you are accommodating more than you can handle, and the irony of doing so is the fact that among those bunch of people not a soul could give the same **** and struggle you are going through keeping you worthy of being attached..Sometimes kindness is a cancer that eats us alive, a sign of being a martyr addicted to caring too much,an open cage where you lock yourself in, a mirror that shows thousands of reflections and none of yours are even present..Being busy bout what others think and feel where you are stuck in a quicksand not knowing to be finally devoured beneath in your own league, a hero's act that needs the saving the most...

Buried my head and got stucked under the sand
I see the world the other way, when I turn around
Not to see you fool me
And let you sneak out behind
I am hating myself completely
All the lil things I've done is wrong
And if I'm gone would you still carry on?
Our heart it speaks a thousand lies to know
That we both don't belong
So if you are lonely
In your heart come visit me
And you'll see our memories
Of happiness turning to tragedy
And if you are in misery
In your mind come visit me
And you'll see our memories of
loneliness
oh so sad to be
I'm over and done I'm moving along
I'm leaving my heart tattered and torn
This is a mistake we both done wrong
If we are't meant to be then let hate goes on

Remember the love and please forget the pain
And I understand the scars will always remain
I promise from this day to be a better man
"And right all my wrongs and all things that I’ve done
I’m sorry I never meant to hurt you this way
Things happens for a reason it’s all that I could say
I know now the  answers for the things I did
Forgiveness is never easy as I wait here and bleed
Hope you read this letter somehow before you burn it
There’s more to this words inked with my every heartbeat
Take this moment to give us a second chance
We both need saving even just for once"

I want to make love like fire melting the snow of winter;
And turn this coldest night burning like the sun in summer
No longer! Together we will escape the world of hate together;
Join me baby let us unite our heart and stay in this dream forever.

I just want to be with you
Wanted to hold you
The way that I used to

In a place where love begun;
Where time has finally gave birth to the sun
The fire that illuminates the darkest night;
Reflected by the moon..A glowing light

In a place where the stars seats and rest;
A wonderful scene at night wishing for the best
In an empty bucket, we drink and drown;
With the pain of knowing we can never be found

Fall forward to a million light-years away;
Where your consciousness drifts while your body stay
Imagining the vast universe within your palm's reach;
A dream-scape for the weary minds when a soul weakens slowly being leeched

Give some and take some a balance for the loathsome;
That will never happen in the case of the lonesome
When one feels living means just to slowly die;
Evaporates like water, a sorrowful rain as they cry

I give no answers I ask no questions;
I seek for the truth with my own explorations
I bleed out hope I breathe in faith;
To survive a life of a never ending hate

Welcome to my nightmare of monstrosity,
A view, deep within a person's atrocity.
We live in a world where evil dethrones,
All what is left where light once shone.

From the depths, once we dreamed...
Now we crawl hiding from the beast within,
Through the infernal flames, we walked
Out from the darkness, once we thought.

It's endless and so it seems!
The suffering won't just die from within,
It rages through like blazing fire,
Devouring all of you and your desires.

What makes a nightmare? What makes it real?
Perhaps you're not dreaming? Maybe it's how it seems?
Waking up hoping for a difference,
Then forcing oneself to sleep
Just to pretend, to try escaping it!

With the absence of illusion one may suffer, not  knowing the truth!
Does it matter now? When you're consumed and left nothing to lose.
Just go on live your life! Or just end it! Enough design your demise!
Hiding, Cowering in the dark! Just to know you're all alone...

A living nightmare worst than when you're asleep,
No point of escaping either way you will face defeat.
For it is you who won't let go! Addicted with the affliction!
For you feed your demons with fears and desolation!

Here I lie facing up the ceiling,
Time has passed me by and still ticking;
I remembered telling myself that it's all over,
That the pain is all gone back when I was sober.

Picking up the pieces of this broken glass.
That I punched that evening where our goodbye's seems the last;
You never had a good reason, but it's all different that night...
Wished you could have told me sooner, we could have avoided the fight.

Where did I go wrong? I kept asking all these years.
Of course there is always something that causing the steers
If I could just turn back time and listened to all your fears
Then there is no need for us to keep holding off our tears.

I never cried literally... But inside I'm flooded with regrets
It's something that a man can do while trying to forget.
Drinking the cheapest bottle of wine just to get his day over;
Breeze through the pain, just to realize tomorrow is another cower.

Hearts, glass, memories and all the things that shatters...
How can one patch up the pain? To completely feel better.
Just like a thousand little stars across the open desert,
All the pieces that are waiting to be whole to be revert.

Questions are asked and it takes two to answer,
Maybe it's time for me to say a little prayer;
Once again here I lie trying to make it all better
Handling with care, all the things that shatters...

I'm sorry for the things I've done;
Our love was strong but now it's gone
Forgive me for the things I've said;
Our love was strong but now it's dead

Your immaculate touch and warm embrace
Your my shining light my sweet caress
your burning lips and perfect hips
A little taste is a fulfilling feat
Drenched in saline tumbling fingers down your spine
Dry skin perspires flooded with wine
Sip and lick all the pleasure is mine
I am going deeper while your angelic eyes shine
Oh so smooth your skin feels so very fine
Silent cries begging faster and for more
The earth shakes and crumble while we do it on floor
With bodies intact glued together as one
Every shrug is as hot as **** burning like the sun
Only you and I are the victim who gladly surrendered
Till' the moment it melts and spills, a love to remember

If this is heaven... Please send me back to hell;
What I've done here to no one I will never tell
The goodness I've become is impossible after the deadly seven;
I was worst than the devil himself ever since I reached the age of eleven.

Why must I wish to be back where evilness only what I know to do?
Perhaps it's because I am someone when I was me and I belong only to the few
But I must also know that there's a time in my life where I prayed to a sleeping God;
I never knew my parents name in an orphanage I grew up and loneliness was the best company I had...

Now that I am old waiting for my final hours writing down all my sins keeping a note of goodness;
Although that note is empty perhaps it's because I doubted if what I've done are purity and sweetness...
I am now on my knees confessing, for the last 70 years of madness and angered soul;
Where I were hoping each day that God let out a lightning to strike me and have it all.

I remembered ******, clear as the tears now that falls down my cheeks;
That crashes down while my heart wails for forgiveness my lips don't move but my mind speaks
All of the crimes I've committed in cold blood, freezing my heart to feel no guilt as I smirk and grin;
I even dared the almighty to save that man's life while I gently squeeze the trigger,bullet pierces his chin...

I cannot recall more of those memories it makes me weep and finally feel the guilt;
I am still breathing yet I know I am already burning in hell my soul can feel the heat
All I ever do now,I'll say it again is waiting for my coming end while never a moment pass I've prayed;
And hope this diary will be read by God just in case, I fall to my death and in hell my soul decay...

I lost myself when you broke my heart
This ******* is like a poison right from the start
Yet I drink in the fountain of your lies and deception
Just to quench the thirst, to set our love in motion?
Insanity maybe, Perhaps it's how it is.
If I could stay happy I choose ignorance as my bliss
Just to shut my eyes from seeing you falling away
You wanted another man, and left no other reason to stay
I made this letter for myself, To remind me of you
That there's no one else made me feel the way you do
So long and goodbye I hope you die
and along with you buried a lie

I’ve been longing for this
I’ve been searching for you
Every night and day I’ve been waiting
If we aren’t meant to be
Then I’ll gladly surrender
Your love’s like a poison I died

Listen to me as I speak so slowly
I’m dying and fading away
A final breath speaks nothing but the truth
your whispers are so full of lies

The end has no end and it goes on forever
A cycle I just can’t take part
Lost in the moment of finding a reason
For this ******* to survive

Just one more touch and I’ll finally let go
A cutthroat kiss would really be nice
Now that it’s done, let’s start all over again
Your love is my poison for life

I think I'm in love with your poetry...
I can feel me all shaky as I breathe heavily!
My heart is pumping thrice than it should normally;
Hey I'm not on drugs! I wish I were so I don't have to worry...

Hurting myself again, like if it's already a thousand times!
It's exaggerated I know! But it's how my feelings define.
Let me slow down a bit, and think it all through;
Is there even a definition to what I'm feeling?Could it be true?

It's funny that this feeling never gets old! Repeatedly told!
Perhaps it's us being human with so much faith to hold...
There's nothing better than the sweet warm embrace of love.
The only thing, the best I've ever had.

So lets go back from what I'm feeling for you;
Help me a bit, tell me what to do? Well... That's something new!
It's not that I can't or won't be able to do a thing...
Just say a little assurance that this will not all end up for nothing.

Oh!Wait!But of course risk is involve!
It's not like your on display and waiting to be sold.
I must make myself worthy, make you feel the same thing that I do
A cliche that all lover should go through.

Oh crap I ran out of words to say!!!
Maybe it's meant to be so I can just do it anyway!
So my love! Will you spare a little time?
Or tell me now are you willing to be mine?

And so here I am all dressed in black
A false assumption of bringing Gothic back
Along with a band of angst-ridden youth
Marching down the aisle of a never ending dispute
Among the rivalry of heroes rise a villain who held the root
That life is a one big lie and death is a very painful truth
So with our souls entwine along with love and hatred
Will the bond break between us?And who's blood to bleed?
You wore the crown far too long enough to be dethrone
Let me be the next king after I'm done with you picking bones
One has to suffer and clearly my time is done, I'm blowing the horns
So hail to your kingdom ruling over wearing the crown of thorns

Have you ever tried feeling deprive?
can't reach for something from the other side
fated by choice you never want,
given a life of what they've decide...

Reality masked your pain, dignity and of what remained
are you not just an empty shell?Without a pride or a soul to sell
you cursed the name of the lord in vain!
yet you pray to keep you sane...

So what of now you asked yourself?
just like you asked yourself yesterday,
no matter what, no matter where
you know you'll always be a number...

When you are not around, I'll look for you
And when you are found I'll snuggle close to you
I'll peck your pouting lips
I'll hold you tight like this
I'll carry you around my back
When your feet's hurting bad
When you are feeling sick, I will tend to you
And when you're feeling cold, I'll be the blanket just for you
I'll bring you water to obey your thirst
I'll be the best among the rest
I'll be the fill when you're feeling lack
Turn your frown around when you're feeling sad

Meteors are soaring down!Devastating those on the ground;
Creating craters of tragedy burying mankind's history;
The world we know will soon decay along with the thoughts we have today;
But why worry?Why be sad?Everything's going to be okay...

I admit it was all too much! The end of days and all those kinds of crap!
Like ***** are flying,heads are rolling,sky's falling where time just stop!
The dead are rising, The horsemen are coming, People are dying!
But why worry?Why be sad?Everything's going to be okay...

So friends what are your points of view?Please would you kindly share?;
The strongest typhoon stroked Philippines, how many of you shown their care?
Was it just the beginning of the coming end?Or to make us once again unite;
So why worry?Aren't you glad?Everything's going to be alright...

How can we tell if it's all over?What is a new beginning?What is a new world order?
Would you rather prefer to just blindly walk?Ask no further questions restrain yourself to talk.
A revelation will soon be unfold!The end is nigh!The judgement of our days;
So why worry?Keep the faith!Everything's going to be okay...

Here comes she who once left,
So close and near but with no presence felt!
Is it a ghost?Oh dear no!She's just a memory
If you believe me so.

So cold that it burns my skin!
So painful, so harsh and it really stings!
It cuts and it pierces but it's not a sword!
Your mouth and your words so full of thorns!

We hate to love of what we hate
It's written down all over our face
Do you truly feel good when you get away with feat
But remember you're just a liar and a cheat!

Here's something new you should try it too!
Do we always follow a strong current but of a waterfall
Or a gentle current that's just slowly and eternally flow
Some are just mere puppet like an arrow from a bow!

This is a riddle in a poetry,
With words of truth and controversy
It may not be that strong but you will surely know
Life is just a game for some just a show!

"Into the dark I journey through the night
In the day I hide from the heat of the sunlight
The death of a living is my way to survive
The blood I borrowed is what keeping me alive

The passion that burns inside me turns to lust
A hunger I suffice when afternoon turns to dusk
I bite I **** I devour I never stop as blood flows
The hunt begins whenever the  darkness falls

Again and again over and over again
The cycle goes on that drives me insane
Madness is what I do so what's the cost of my lament
Is there any way I can stop ?What a silly question to repent"

Through out the years, humans evolve to something better,
Someone among us will eventually tap even further...
Beyond all that is normal to a human body will change,
Look deeper and from beneath one's able to reach something out of range...

The sense of sight where we see the physical world and all its beauty,
Sometimes became a curse for all their lives, they only seen all that is ugly
We make use of our eyes to see things with appreciation before judging clearly,
That in our minds will be etched, painted picture of the meaning of all things we see...

The sense of hearing where we listen to the world and all that surrounds us,
That is sometimes dreadful where only what one hears are all other's lies
For the world whispers the truth more often than the lies being constantly yelled,
Schemes and plots are the same, only gets worst when being told not asked from what is being said...

The sense of smell and taste where we scent and savour the world's natural resources
The smell of the polluted air that's killing the environment that ends the life of withering trees and roses.
The taste of the food we eat everyday, so satisfying keeps us alive keeps us going,
Only that everyday is a slaughter, and the belly became a graveyard just in order to survive to end the craving...

The sense of touch where we feel the world with our flesh and bones to communicate,
The lust that the body craves is the strongest feeling that makes us grow and replicate,
Where the saddest form is pain which one feels from all the torments and torture,
A reminder that the world is unfair full of tyranny causing' all kinds of terror!!!

The sixth sense where we see the beyond of what this world have left behind...
We see things we don't understand yet some see them clearly the ghost where they stand,
The ability to communicate with the dead... An astral projection,
ones who have crossed the realm of the other world...A misconception ,
that it change faith and beliefs that changes life how it cycles and revolves...

The seventh sense... It is said that one who are able to tap and awakens it, can see the world's future,
The ability that one can bend time and space, a walk through time that changes the course of nature...
Flashing forward centuries and back again, To witness and prevent changes of things that might happen
Playing God became a taboo even before the beginning, so what's the message? For all this ability one is having?

Is God speaking to ask providing us potentials, a chance to see the world through his eyes?
How are we going to make use of the free will he bestowed unto us to see no more lies!
Only the truth that disrupts the balance mankind has made! Like rules a government planned
Or it will remain a mystery that only God knows and understand... The questions that are in our minds...

" Breathing Heavily,
           Shivering in the darkness
                       No presence of light"
                                                             "Hands are all shaky
                                                                   Suffering paranoia    
                                                                        Crawling in the dark"
                                                                                                              "Suffocating room
                                                                                                                      Her eyes dilated with fear
                                                                                                                                    Hopelessly Screaming"

The symphony of the night... Can you hear it?
Come dear lets waltz with the rhythm as your heart beats...
Face to face we dance round and round,
Eye to eye we stare and silence became a sound...

I can feel it... The pounding on your chest;
As you breathe slowly enjoying this moment...
Perhaps it's your last, no one will ever know,
What's behind this mask, just a bit more I will show...

(Palpitate!Yes let your blood rush through your veins!)
I promise your warm blood will not be in vain!
I can't restrain myself! Shall I rip her throat now?!
Let the gashing begin breaking the vow!

The music is at its intense part,
The notes it rise and fall like the beat of your heart,
Matching the moment as it come to an end!
I apologize dear for in my hands you must suffer hell...

Sorry love for you must quench my thirst!
No point in screaming! And please wipe off your tears!
It turns out our love to be a ****** romance.
It all ends with a bite, halting our last dance...

Silence has been so long
No words to say that wasn't wrong
I only wanted express my self
But the gravity wasn't doing much help

I clinched my fist way too many times
Gritting teeth, I breathe and calm my mind
Then I loosen up and move along
My self control has became so strong

I lost my temper, cursing with my vile tongue
All them cruelty have been said and so my rage could be gone
But deep inside even when words have said and done
This war between us have only just begun

I never thought that I would be
Someone that you wanted to see
Under the cherry blossom tree
Together alone just you and me

I know you were always the one
With a warmth that burns like the sun
Turns cold when you were gone
I regret everything that I've done

Now with this moment we took
Back the feelings we've  overlooked
Just like one of those story in a book
Our love are again tangled in a hook

With another chance for us to share
I will love you with so much care
From now on I will always be there
With a broken promises to repair

There's hole beneath me I can't quite fathom
Until I fell and buried me, then it became a tomb
Holding my very existence of what of my means?
Till' the end, so much questions bursting at the seams
Then I woke up in a dream where I'm still dying
Holding my breath with your air in my lungs, so suffocating
I realized the difference that there are none
Living or dying it doesn't matter just wanna leave and be gone
Off and out of this world far far away from your memory
Somewhere where there's a new me and you in reverse so happy
Together in a book filled with colorful words not in grey
Sometimes I question Love! Cause' it doesn't really know how to pay
Better days drowned along with me drinking gallons of rums
Efforts wasted sacrifices voided into an empty bottle of jams
Where it supposed to flavor the flame with sweetness burning
Not with bitterness of sorrow hate misery and so much aching
Now I'm done writing my complaints for today gotta drift away
I'll bury myself alive with questions of what tomorrow would say

Freefalling in the depths of dreams
Searching for the love you'll bring
When I find you, I will never let go
And when I wake up it's something I will stow

With your sparkling eyes, I see stars
Through you, I Finally learned to soar the skies
Never before that I have felt this way
A feeling! More than words can say

You were a swan, when I first saw you
On a lake called dragon's mouth I found you
And together we flew and sang the sweetest
Most restful music heard upon this earth

Somehow I know we belong together even before birth
I finally found love, a reason, a way to escape the hurt
We are fated to be here, tangled tight in this world
With an embrace so warm, so vivid and so bold

It's time to wake up! Snap back to reality
Only to know that in my world I am sad and lonely
Never a moment I wished I could sleep and dream for eternity
If that means being with you even if the odds are highly unlikely

I know it was all in my mind the way I longed for love
I've never been there before, I was always been so sad
Not till' I found you in my dreams, Caer Ibormeith my Goddess
At least even in my sleep, for a moment I can escape my sadness

So here I am again, waiting for the fall of darkness
Longing for the touch, the embrace of my Goddess
Closing my eyes now, preparing to sleep
Hoping this time it will last longer, as I slumber deep

Not for this world we two meant to belong;
Together in each other's arms soon it won't be long;
Close your eyes believe coz' we are not alone;
We are among the many in seek for a place called home;It's where your heart is, as my heart is where yours are;All I can do is to wait for a bit of eternity and gaze from afar;I wish I could drift in space with a map to the stars;Even if it would mean a million years to get to where you are;I'll rally a waypoint and sling myself to move starting from mars;Darling it would be pretty if you could witness how I would go;Maybe a simple hugs and kisses with the 3 little words would do;Where the easiest way could be the most complicated to take part when you are stuttering and couldn't even say the words right;It's just the lack of confidence and self doubts that shouldn't be there that made my lungs tight;I'm choking maybe dying and it ***** if that would be tonight;I'll let the angels sing as they carry on with the last rites;But wait I won't die yet not until I'm actually dead;Not until you hear me out and listen to what I've said;It's lame writing on this paper with my heart inking it;Where you are just on a corner?Why is it so hard for me to approach you and speak?!;**** it!!Here we go!I'm going romantic with each steps so slow so over dramatic;As I drew myself close to you holding my breath is causing me to panic;**** it!Don't hyperventilate steady feet don't fail now;****!I'm gonna throw up!I gotta hit the restroom first somehow

When I am on my knees I don't see myself so tall any more
I am looking up from this ground while I lay down my knees on the floor;
With my hands grasp together for a prayer, will my sins be gone?
Never before I called upon our father almighty and be a worthy son.

And so like an hourglass, this moment's counting down all of my lies
I can see my faint reflection from the tears on the ground straight from the eyes;
I became so ignorant that I found only self-righteous beliefs and deceits
Not one that is lifting my soul but one that is all about dragging someone else's feet.

So I am here in this cathedral alone under his crucified body
I saw myself cry as I beg for my sins to be cleanse with mercy;
If only I can bear the cross that our father held to atone for my sins I would
If only I can say sorry to those people I've done wrong and for them to do something good.

Then this must be the sign to start the act of redemption
For I know in this moment I am having a divine intervention;
Have I mentioned along with me is a caliber .37 loaded with a full chamber
I am so glad I found him and made me realized that my life isn't yet over.

Initializing Project Insomnia...
Gathering subject's data...
Synchronization complete...
Memory gauge ready to deplete....

Tracing last memory relapse...
Engaging before the time elapse...
Extracting remaining portion of the brain activity...
Eliminating for complete inability...

Subject 001 successfully terminated...
Preparing clone... preparation completed...
System malfunction... Rebooting system...
Mainframe breached... Multiple data hacked...

Re-Animating subject 001...
Life support activated...
Re-installing memory...
Reanimation complete...

Subject 001 is back online...
Bio organic weapon functional...
Preparing extermination...
Codename: Alpha initiated...

Join me in death, come now and follow
Only then we can finally walk the path of the hallow
Honoring the life, of what we've left behind
Never before forgotten, the memories painted in our minds

At last we came to finally understand,
Like footsteps we'll remain printed in the sand
Vanishing by waves when it hits the shore
Intended to be, washing up who we were before
Now what are your beliefs? have you ever tasted deceit?

Ask yourself now...
Rather than to follow...
Rethink to remember that you,
Unwillingly surrendered
Everything that you lived for
Just to escape how you've lost your faith
Only to know it's too far gone, It's far too late...

If we are to plunge sinful deep into the fiery pits;
This room is fully empty imma go with half eyelids;
Ten fathoms deep sullen and angst ridden on the roadway to hell;
With a fist full of soul candy that makes your spirit swell;
And on my arrival I will greet the cereberus with my bag of bones;
Filled with much regrets before I prayed for unforgotten atones;
I will whistle my swan song walking across its grotesque corridors;
While wailing souls orchestrating with me as they try to sing along;
I payed my dues..Well not maybe?but who cares to collect? to come to me;
I have been abused feelings misused the attitude branded my character they see;
Too little too early I am too far young to die;
If you gonna be the death of me that is how I wanna go and that's no lie;
So I woke up wrongly in this ****** up world that torns me;
So let me walk my own ******* fate go ahead stop me and you'll see;
Ten thousand chaos in a heartbeat will rain down on you;
From best to worst art of filleting skin,incisions and decapitations too;
Are you impressed where my words came from so undivine and unearthly?;
Google it quick search! every bit returns a seconds worth of zero query

Why does the sun have to be so bright? for the moon to look so pale
Why does the sky have to be so high? As you lay down on the grass and stare
At the faces and shapes it makes as it revolves around our heads
Someday we'll be so tall enough to get us anywhere

Raise it up raise it up throw your hands up in the air
Feel the air beneath your arms let the wind blows to take you there
Let your heart let your heart make believe that you'll get there someday
Like a dandelion heading to where your dreams belong

Why does the earth seems to revolve so fast? I got me riding on a carousel
Why does my mind seems off today? Girl you got me daydreaming again
The times I get to see you, hold you like your mine is an answered prayer
Someday we'll be together and that will go on forever

Look above look above lets watch the fireworks up in the air
Feel my arms across your shoulder let this moment take us there
Close your eyes close your eyes let this kiss mean a thousand words
It's our closest to forever so lets just stay like this together

Tie a knot in between
Tear the flesh off my skin
Rip my heart to let you in
A parade of lust in a bloodstream
Kiss the fears off of my eyes
**** the venom of a thousand lies
Rid me off of this wretched demise
Say a prayer as the candle dies
Call me home like a church bell ringing
Prepare a swansong that is worth singing
In every verse and line souls are wailing
Listen closely as they whisper"They're Waiting"

A sweet sound touches my ears
Deep in my heart, out from my skin
An echo that reverberates in my head
Out from my mouth, inking this pen
An empty paper filled with words
Nothing is said just a "Dear" and your name
An envelope to hold my letter and carry this
To you where you are, sealed with a kiss..

Dear Future,
Present may pass
Becoming our past
This too shall pass
The heartaches and goodbyes
Secrets keep you sick
Waiting to unveil with a burning wick
A light from above
Guidance of our God
Will save you a day
To listen and pray
If there's any other way
To fix a broken heart

Life itself is a one sweet lie
When death becomes a bitter truth the moment you die;
The mystery behind the endless masquerade
Unveils with the incision of bodies lined up for a parade;
Of souls waltzing and wailing at the melody of gaea
Bidding goodbyes for a holy departure in a new world euthopia;
A new beginning to write and live a tragedy inked with sins
The world never was a wonderland for the broken,trapped in misery with suffering and pain in every scene

Living each day like you're already dead;
Is like always waking up on the wrong side of the bed
Perhaps it is how it feels to others, to some;
But unlike me I've been waking up empty, next to none.

Breathe in, Breathe out is what I always tell myself;
Trying to conquer death is like living without a shell
Any moment your vulnerability will be invaded by emptiness;
Too busy to find something to do with too much nothingness.

How empty a soul can be without the will to move forward?
Always holding unto memories you can't go back..Things you can't have
Come to think of it..Is it really not possible to just die and relive existent?
Like we can just opt out and respawn if we feel that the pain is consistent.

So shallow I know to think like that when out of your mind;
Hey! You can't blame a person to ponder when life left them behind
One can think of many things when in sorrow, all that is farfetch;
Yet..It still true that trying is better rather than succumb yourself to death.

Why choose sadness while you cower in the dark?
Where you can walk your life with happiness and stand in the light?
Why choose sorrow while you cry shattering your heart?
Where you can smile with joy and face a brand new start?

Why close the door while locking your self inside?
Where you can open your heart and invite someone in?
Why shut your eyes while life leaves you blind?
Where you can open your mind while love keeps you kind?

Why keep asking why? while you can ask how?
How can you change your ways and be better now.
Remember that tomorrow never ends and so is the sorrow;
When you keep holding onto it, keep in mind that happiness cannot just be borrow.

So start thinking of how and what can you do to make you feel better;
Not to keep drowning yourself with misery and pain just to feel sicker.
For one never will feel satisfy themselves with self inflicted tragedy;
It only makes you worst! Loving the doom you cast upon yourself for eternity...

Resuscitate our dead memories only just to die again;
Waking from a deep slumber, Staring out the window pane;
Counting hours, how long can I endure the need to restrain?;
Nothing have changed I should just get back to sleep again.

The sun rises slowly as it burns my pale tainted skin;
It just felt so good just to feel pain! For so long I've been so keen;
I grew weak in my dreams when I'm asleep, the thoughts of you makes me sick!
It's not that you vexes me, It's because of what I did to you that worries me;

Never before I have felt so sensitive within this lifeless body...
Lived only by drinking blood! To be confined in this coffin just to feel lonely!
And then you came... The one I thought who restrained the beast in me;
The one who gave warmth not burning me, calmed my soulless fury.

But we must all know that the nature has its way of breaking;
Something that is beautiful, Something profound! A new beginning...
And so it came to that point where I fed on her! left her dying!
Perhaps it was all meant to be for a while just to forget the craving...

I'm a killer, a monster! An abomination to this world!
But I can't take my life...Believe me I tried!
I bathed under the sun turn to ashes and died!
Only to know that when darkness falls I'll be revived...

I must make a choice... It fancies me just having this thoughts right now;
What could I possibly do?If the beast within is the one who contains me and how?
It seems like a personal attraction just to add some satisfaction as I reach for the ****;
A little drama, show some masked humanity, make them live a little just to quench the thrill!

I have glared, I have grinned, I have laughed and I have seduced...
As I get closer for my teeth to sink in, let loose, let the hunger reduced;
But after the feed do I feel remorse? For hours I thought I did...
It's been like that through all the years... Feels redundant indeed.

So how far will this story goes? For centuries I have pondered in circles.
I have been there the evolution, the changes, the life as it cycles.
And again...Here and now as I stand where once I become capable staring at the sun;
I will forget the unforgettable, sail away! Far away from this land...

Remember my story as it will never end;
I'm finding a way now to break free from this curse;
To be one with my prey walk free no more blood to quench thirst;
So long and goodbye from me Dracula...
Serenity is what I seek...A redemption of what they speak.

And so here I am again sharing my journey;
I am now living among men in this sleepless city
267 years since I sailed away and ventured land to land;
Living deep within the woods among the wolves I made a bond...

Draining the blood of an animal to quench my thirst while the wolves feast after;
I got used to living feeding only on livestocks so no more men may suffer
The wrath of my beastly instinct that feared by many for centuries;
I am the creeping darkness,heartless,cold and vile it's all written in their stories...

I remained calm and humble satisfied with loneliness in exchange of their safety;
As I contemplate my chosen fate, breaking this madness for a ****! Am I even worthy?
A question I never wanted to ask myself again...Never before I felt blessed neither cursed;
All I know is that I have chosen to be someone not something carrying a coffin in a hearse.

The date, 24th of December 2013... It is winter here now, where I finally found a place to belong;
Never before I felt accepted, loved and it feels warm inside that I can truly say I found a home
They are even inviting me into their so called Christmas where Jesus were born sacrificing himself to save us;
Hearing his deed made me realized and even were strived to pursue changes from what I once was...

This is where my journey brought me so far in seek of redemption...
So long for now my dear friend, a diary of my new so called reflection,
Sometimes hiding behind a mask is what we all need to blend in reality;
While the darkest side of you restrained inside forever remains a mystery...

Are we lost? Or are we just fine?
Hold me close tell me where to find
You when I feel like falling out of reach
In a dream maybe where you are standing by the beach
Covered in sand this castle of ours
I dream of you always and it goes on for hours
I don't wanna wake up if it means losing you
I will gladly make that, just tell me and I'll do
Your eyes are blue with a kaleidoscope of colours in different hue
I am so not gonna move from here cause I am enjoying the view
A reflection of me and you and a world we created on our own
There's no place like home in your arms where I belong

I am tripping on a corner watching the whole world spin;
As I wrap myself with smoke, the suicidal taste of nicotine
When boredom strikes casting me my final moment of doom;
Eventually I realize things are redundant as I lock myself in this room

What a beautiful way to live life only to feel you're dying;
So shut the hell up my friend!Stop preaching we both know you're lying
Bearing the cross, carrying the weight of the world on my shoulder;
Holy mother of christ it gets worst as I get older...

My dreams turns to a living nightmare everyday I hang my ambition to this gallows;
I sentence me to death!Taking away my existence so the rest will follow
Never before I contemplate what's with the issues I'm having I gladly surrender;
In the cold embrace of death in the name of thy father, the son and the holy spirit may I shall be remembered

Please wake up! You're falling asleep
With eyes wide open, listen to me as I speak
Can you understand? The rhythm of my heartbeat
I'm always here for you, even if it means I will no longer breathe

Dying in your arms is a beautiful scene
Even if it ends tragic or may appear obscene
My love for you will go on forever
Until all the lights that surrounds me go dim

Please hold on don't let go for I feel cold
Can no longer feel my lips, fingers and my toes
Is this really how it ends? Now that I have you?
For a moment at least I'm happy, I think I can let go...

I'm counting hours, minutes to seconds as I breathe
How long will I last? With this bullets piercing my bones
I swear to myself that I will always be there to save you
Even it means sending myself to heaven... Funny saying this now to you...

There is one thing my love, that I would like to know
Will you feel the same? Do the same? Will you ever show?
Not like this kind of confession... Where my love lies bleeding
Any moment now I'll go dry with no hope of living...

So please whisper it to my ears... Let me know... Give me one last kiss
Or let me just die here right now in your arms a sanctuary I long seek
I can feel me facing my end! It such a shame can't even move my lips
Perhaps in another life I'll just watch over you... (Heart slowly stops to beat)

I see myself lying being held in her arms with tears being shed
I can't hear her cry... I'm trying to read her lips as she speaks
Faint voices slowly echoes as she whisper to my lifeless ears
"I love you even before you did" she said... bursting tears

Ambulance are singing! Cops are gathering in my death scene
I can hear a faint heart beat as I see myself fading...
From a moment of darkness I see lights through my eye lids
I see her face, her smile while our hands tightly held...

"Sun and moon unites
          Offering a brand new light"
                          World in black and white"

With so much letters written
And not a word is made
With so much hate I'm aching
Best plan she ever laid
The lies as she cheat is growing
My heart is better off dead
But I kept on keeping me going
Till the end, waited for the time she said
'Sorry we can't be together anymore...I love
someone else and you started to become a bore'
That night is the night where I lost control
I went out on a rampage shutting down all doors
I thought about losing her so many times before
But it really weren't that easy, specially her acted like a *****
The day came where she came back begging
With open arms and a tight hug, I'm grinning
What's in my mind is as sick attempt of ******
Only the sufffering is one can bear forever
3 years of silence a masquerade and a dance
Whispering past echoes saying'this is your chance'
Of what to do with my caged wrath?If she is so warm lying on my arms
I am waiting and hating her loving and keeping her off harm
Only to ripen the revenge sweet tasty and profound
And so I'm still waiting..Kissing her forehead and let her sleep without a sound..