I never thought that I would be
Someone that you wanted to see
Under the cherry blossom tree
Together alone just you and me

I know you were always the one
With a warmth that burns like the sun
Turns cold when you were gone
I regret everything that I've done

Now with this moment we took
Back the feelings we've  overlooked
Just like one of those story in a book
Our love are again tangled in a hook

With another chance for us to share
I will love you with so much care
From now on I will always be there
With a broken promises to repair

"As blood runs black
Darker than black
Flesh has been whacked
From front to back
It began to decay and rot
Hanging upside down tied in a knot
This body is long dead and gone
Time of death is approximately half past one"

I used to walk the broad daylight
Without the hunger I suffice every night
This addiction to **** for a moment to live
Has become my curse without a remorse to give

I didn't ask for this, something called as an abomination
Never thought I would become something out of a imagination
Life to me where once so simple now all's bizarre and uncanny
I circle and walk the night causing terror and horror as my reality

You may all be wondering how a man turns to a creature of the fallen
When did I became something that I am not?How did it happen?
It started 400 years ago when I fell in love with a beautiful countess
Her name's still haunts me Elizabeth Bathory the midnight huntress

Even the most radiant rose in appearance in the end shows their true color when they wither
She is dark merciless and vile when dusk falls she saps life like plants in need of water
One night as I walk along the shore of castle cachtice unaware of her being
I saw her standing there like wine in a glass being offered to quench a man's thirst and craving

I came to her like a hungry wolf, only to realize I am the sheep under a butcher's hook
I stare just to witness what fear looks like, as death bites a way in my vision blurred and blood was took
I woke up the next day only to be reminded that it wasn't just a nightmare
I soon then stop the struggle and feed my first **** and became a heir

I couldn't speak the tale of all the endless slaughter till' the day she was immured
I am being kept secret in the dark not knowing of my existence for centuries the curse I endured
An ending to a nightmare has finally came to pass with the death of the queen of the ******
But a new story of terror has began the hunting the feeding the killing where I myself couldn't stand

Sorry I must admit I've reached my limits
And couldn't swallow the daily dose of deceits
I am giving up slowly..No this time I surrender
These are the things one shouldn't even have to remember

You buried me deep 12 feet under till' I couldn't be found
You pushed me hard off the cliff, I met the ground without a sound
So much metaphors to describe my anger,torments and pain
I must say you are the best when it comes to driving me insane

Can't explain everything I've been through with you in four simple lines
Lets just say those are the the things a relationship can suffer having hard times
Don't even know why am I even trying knowing you wouldn't even listen
But I hope someday you'll wake up next to nothing and it's me who is missing


Where is this going to end? A simple question full of amends
Not from me, but for you to come clean so we can somehow be friends
But it seems you are the coldest kind of person one can turn to be
I've had enough to worry no more misery cause this is the last of me

"there is no purity in light or dark but we can make a difference which to weigh most.."

There is something in your eyes
That makes it hard to say goodbye
But I can’t stay and breathe your lies
You used to always speak the truth
When apologies has been misused
Now our love have been denied

It’s time for us to say goodbye
So many times we failed to try
This love can never be revive
It’s finally time to close our doors
We can’t feel us anymore
A part of me just died

Love long gone x 4

So weak I couldn't stand on my feet
So I crawled hastily to escape my defeat
But remember I will stand back up to redeem honour
For my heart's filled with passion and undying valour

I layed down my weapons for a moment not to retreat or surrender
But to focus and breathe that winning and to live is life's only reminder
That once cut down by your enemies and your head as their trophy
You won't get to walk another chance in this arena..My friend believe me

And so with mind set to war, a man to man duel to the death
A battle of one man, one fight, one right to determine the fate
No hesitation no holds barred win the crowd for the victor takes it all
This is the warrior's way in a fight the path of a gladiator

You melt the sorrows away
You ignite and rekindled the flame
You burned the bridges to make us stay
where we are is safer from the storm that came

We share the light whenever darkness falls
We grew stronger, time to time we fan the blaze
To never fall apart and be separated as our heart calls
For another night with fire in our eyes with each other's gaze

There's one thing in life with all certainty I know
That right from the start I felt you are the one
If I am wrong and our love turns cold like snow
I really doubt that though for our love shines like the summer's sun

"Into the dark I journey through the night
In the day I hide from the heat of the sunlight
The death of a living is my way to survive
The blood I borrowed is what keeping me alive

The passion that burns inside me turns to lust
A hunger I suffice when afternoon turns to dusk
I bite I **** I devour I never stop as blood flows
The hunt begins whenever the  darkness falls

Again and again over and over again
The cycle goes on that drives me insane
Madness is what I do so what's the cost of my lament
Is there any way I can stop ?What a silly question to repent"

"The blood you bleed
That I drink to live
The life you lose
From the dead I rose
The Lies you breathe
Where hate gave birth
To chaos, carnage and dread
An endless cycle of nightmares in your head"

"You are my something from nothing
My one thing to anything&everything;"

And when you fall to give it all
Lose everything to get you through the wall
That divides the truth between right from wrong
And finally find a place for your heart where it belong…

And when you fail from what you believe
Don’t give up and  fight forward to succeed
That there’s no room to wait and time to waste
And now it’s clear…That life’s an endless cycle a one big race

So open up the door and take control
Of what weighing deep inside you let it go
So open up cause’ there’s still time
To what you want the world for you to  find

So don’t give in face your fears
The ghost within that’s been haunting you for years
So don’t hold back free yourself
From the corner of that empty shelf

So write a book  fill the empty
Pages of your life with a brand new story
You’re once lost without a sound
You’re still searching so now be found

Remember the love and please forget the pain
And I understand the scars will always remain
I promise from this day to be a better man
"And right all my wrongs and all things that I’ve done
I’m sorry I never meant to hurt you this way
Things happens for a reason it’s all that I could say
I know now the  answers for the things I did
Forgiveness is never easy as I wait here and bleed
Hope you read this letter somehow before you burn it
There’s more to this words inked with my every heartbeat
Take this moment to give us a second chance
We both need saving even just for once"

"We made promises that we can't break and deny
Cause' they are all empty our love's a one a big lie
Our tears turned into wine that drowns us every night
We sat down together making ripples...The lake of lies"

Creeping ‘round the corner of your walls
Silently I wait till darkness falls
Night has finally come to turn me
Into something myself would hate me
Quench the thirst, a bite to **** you
Take each drop that’s how I hate you
I’ll sink my teeth into your skin
And quench the thirst from deep within
You bleed for love I hate to ****
A little slice to fill the thrill
You know this wounds will never heal
The pain and torments are very real
Your love’s like a poison right from the start
Your lies like stakes it pierced my heart

I am staring at my own reflection
Seeing through the eyes of the dead
I am listening to the dead silence
Hearing myself whisper as I scream

I am falling apart my world is crumbling
Down to ashes with my memories left my head
Fading, goes away my existence
Nothing left but a ghost in your world

You are the hearse that carried me to my grave
Your heart is my coffin as I lay for eternal rest
Your embrace, your arms I will miss a sweet caress
Remember my face darling I am now in a better place

This is not the end,this is not a goodbye
We will meet again soon in another life
I will search for you with the scent of your breathe
Let our love pull us back together again in another time

"Love love love sets us all in motion
When two hearts unite it's a natural selection
Put a little faith, loyalty and devotion
And you will find a strong build of foundation"

"The reality about nothing is a false deception of one's mind...There is always a force within everything, something and anything that occurs...Nothing is simply an excuse to escape, a momentarily reason of lacking...For some reason we assume nothing when we find what we need or what we want to see, feel and think is not presented like in an instance a jar of cookies looking in we say it is empty yet there is air molecules tiny pieces microscopic evidence of a physical thing we want to see...In short yup nothing is when our perception couldn't see through what we need to see or failed to see."

Note: I took the time to ponder about writing this just sharing a thought deuces guys "3

"The sad truth about perfection is
that there's no more room for imagination"

You better run as fast you can
Don't look back cause you won't understand
The terror behind you is hotter than hell
You'll burn like a candle you'll melt and swell

Nowhere to run to, nowhere to go
A place to hide you don't even know
Keep moving forward don't ever get caught
'Cause if it gets you, it will simply turn you to salt

Your legs are weak and you're ready to fall
Don't have the strength to get up or to crawl
Can't process any kind of words, what to say
Cause you don't even have the time to think back and pray

Prepare to meet the wrath of a thousand suns
Dig through the grave of sins where it all begone
This is the end and it's all too late to think of your sons
A damnation of war that can wipe out all of our clan.

There's a way back home to bring myself to you
There's a way I know to finally be with you
There's a place I'll be when I failed to come to see
There's a face I'll see cause you're always here with me

There's a note I wrote of how I am missing you;

And I know, it is hard to find a way back in your arms
When you know that you're already with someone
And I am not the one x2

Hello, Goodbye To you x4

Living each day like you're already dead;
Is like always waking up on the wrong side of the bed
Perhaps it is how it feels to others, to some;
But unlike me I've been waking up empty, next to none.

Breathe in, Breathe out is what I always tell myself;
Trying to conquer death is like living without a shell
Any moment your vulnerability will be invaded by emptiness;
Too busy to find something to do with too much nothingness.

How empty a soul can be without the will to move forward?
Always holding unto memories you can't go back..Things you can't have
Come to think of it..Is it really not possible to just die and relive existent?
Like we can just opt out and respawn if we feel that the pain is consistent.

So shallow I know to think like that when out of your mind;
Hey! You can't blame a person to ponder when life left them behind
One can think of many things when in sorrow, all that is farfetch;
Yet..It still true that trying is better rather than succumb yourself to death.

I saw the tears fell down from Danah's eyes
And it hurts so bad that I am about to die;
To see you fall and break as you were left behind
All the memories you shared turns to black and white.

And I never wanted to leave
I'm the only one that makes you breathe;
When you're suffocated by the lies he brought you
But you shut your eyes not to see the truth;
Cheated by the games he played with you
When he says "I love you"
But here I am never had the chance to say that so I do..That so I do

I tried to catch the tears as they fall down
But it came down fast that it crush the ground;
I can feel the pain inside, deep inside your heart
And it reminds you of the scars of the past.

And I never wanted to leave
I am the only one that makes you sleep tonight..
Don't get tired of loving, don't lose your hope never back down
There's always a way to make the same the way you felt before...

When I am on my knees I don't see myself so tall any more
I am looking up from this ground while I lay down my knees on the floor;
With my hands grasp together for a prayer, will my sins be gone?
Never before I called upon our father almighty and be a worthy son.

And so like an hourglass, this moment's counting down all of my lies
I can see my faint reflection from the tears on the ground straight from the eyes;
I became so ignorant that I found only self-righteous beliefs and deceits
Not one that is lifting my soul but one that is all about dragging someone else's feet.

So I am here in this cathedral alone under his crucified body
I saw myself cry as I beg for my sins to be cleanse with mercy;
If only I can bear the cross that our father held to atone for my sins I would
If only I can say sorry to those people I've done wrong and for them to do something good.

Then this must be the sign to start the act of redemption
For I know in this moment I am having a divine intervention;
Have I mentioned along with me is a caliber .37 loaded with a full chamber
I am so glad I found him and made me realized that my life isn't yet over.

In this hands is a broken home of shattered glass
Tattered memories, a recollection of the past
No hope of recreating what is already destroyed
But I kept holding on, my palms bleed out what are stored
Remember the beauty in what now is ugly
A horrible mess from once that is pretty
Put a little faith on those profound beliefs
That there is a way to patch, a heart to keep
Stop hanging by a thread, stitch them back up with your daily bread
Let it shine out from the darkest night
Be your own star, a sun with the brightest light
A warm embrace may be as simple as it look
If you love each other you know you read her/him like a book
So here I hold, so here I keep the broken glass
A reflection of mistakes this shattered past

Scream till' you can't
Black out, fall down and faint
Sink in, let out and let go
Is the only thing that I ever know

I have faced all my fears
I have poured out the tears
Bleed out dry and let die
crumble down while you try

You have lost all your faith
Your heart is filled up with hate
All hope is gone and you know it's too late
To climb back up, to fall down so accept your fate

We've gave everything till' there's nothing left
We sold our soul to hell to measure its depth
Heaven is so far away locked down in its basement
Here we rest in damnation sempiternal lament

If I had the chance to hide
All the feelings that just died
Then will you ever seek the truth
Deep within, my love's has been misused

It triggers the chance to survive
Where I am now feeling more alive
Alone but not lonely, scarred and broken
Locked in silence with words unspoken

Three lines to describe this tragedy
I wrote this words and turns it to a poetry
That you are all just like me
Always questioning love and reality

Sorry for whining I am not complaining
I wrote this poem today cause' I am just wondering
Why things happen?Although it comes with a reason
Even from the start we know love can be your poison..

I am falling up while you're breaking down
I am tearing down what we've both built
I am sheltering us from your storm
We both failed to grasp, A new hate is born

I lost myself when you broke my heart
This ******* is like a poison right from the start
Yet I drink in the fountain of your lies and deception
Just to quench the thirst, to set our love in motion?
Insanity maybe, Perhaps it's how it is.
If I could stay happy I choose ignorance as my bliss
Just to shut my eyes from seeing you falling away
You wanted another man, and left no other reason to stay
I made this letter for myself, To remind me of you
That there's no one else made me feel the way you do
So long and goodbye I hope you die
and along with you buried a lie

Silence has been so long
No words to say that wasn't wrong
I only wanted express my self
But the gravity wasn't doing much help

I clinched my fist way too many times
Gritting teeth, I breathe and calm my mind
Then I loosen up and move along
My self control has became so strong

I lost my temper, cursing with my vile tongue
All them cruelty have been said and so my rage could be gone
But deep inside even when words have said and done
This war between us have only just begun

A sweet sound touches my ears
Deep in my heart, out from my skin
An echo that reverberates in my head
Out from my mouth, inking this pen
An empty paper filled with words
Nothing is said just a "Dear" and your name
An envelope to hold my letter and carry this
To you where you are, sealed with a kiss..

I'm sorry for the things I've done;
Our love was strong but now it's gone
Forgive me for the things I've said;
Our love was strong but now it's dead

I am a hollow and cast no shadow;
And loneliness became my only tomorrow
With no happiness and time to borrow;
Empty as can be overflowing with sorrow...

My soul is bound to suffer;
Trapped in the dark only to cower
No intervention just constant desolation;
I have my own world in complete isolation...

Screams can no longer be heard by my ears;
As whispers echo in my head a cycle that steers
I can no longer define the meaning of life, why am I here?
Do I even exist and for what cause' or purpose? What do I fear?

I question answers to ask myself as I've been told the truth;
What can I possibly gain? Which kind of torment can bare a fruit?
There's gotta be more than this?What of my existence breathing in void?;
This could be a living damnation one that cannot be questioned...Is this God's choice?...

When will I ever see the light? Am I even trying? While I stay up all night;
Thinking and pondering how I get this far? What have I done to suffer blight?
Questions I asked myself in an endless cycle, a redundant process I walked through lines of blasphemy daily;
There's no complexity in this...A living Nightmare and misery..

Make me bleed baby please,
Make me believe that I still live
Make me need baby please,
Make me know I still want something to give

Make me cry baby please,
Make me feel you closer than the tears
Make me rest baby please,
Make me calm and forget all my fears

Make me break angel please,
Make me know I can be whole again
Make me fall baby please,
Make me realize that I can stand back up again

Make me touch you angel please,
Make me caress your soft feather wings
Make me see the light angel please,
Make me see through beauty in ugly things

Make me kiss you angel please,
Make me quench the thirst through your lips,
Make me hold you again angel please,
Make me soar across heavens with my hands held on your hips

Make me makes me me,
Make me become who I am used to be
Make me make you make me,
Make me believe this is gotta be...

I'm watching me watching you watching me
Through a mirror a faint reflection of us to see
I gazed upon the world of perception
A view of us together in complete perfection
The silence became our sanctuary
As this moment became eternity
No longer the coldness remain
I took a picture and have us framed
A different view of me and you
A kaleidoscope of colors white and blue

There's gotta be a price to pay for the fame I'm drowning in my head
There's gotta be a better place for me to rest dragging this coffin as my bed
Well death's knocking on my door I'm begging him for more just a little more
And he's slowly takes my soul before I have it all before I take my fall

There's gotta be a better way to escape my fate I'm running out of time
There's gotta be a better place for my soul to rest I'm paying all my crimes
Well hell is taking now my soul I'm losing my control as I weakly crawl
The fire's burning well my skin tortures me within I am just an empty hole

God save me!I'm sorry!Forgive me!
What have become of me?It's too late to be free!
God save me!I'm sorry!Forgive me!
I'm far away from heaven!Hell is where I meant to be!

In a place where love begun;
Where time has finally gave birth to the sun
The fire that illuminates the darkest night;
Reflected by the moon..A glowing light

In a place where the stars seats and rest;
A wonderful scene at night wishing for the best
In an empty bucket, we drink and drown;
With the pain of knowing we can never be found

Fall forward to a million light-years away;
Where your consciousness drifts while your body stay
Imagining the vast universe within your palm's reach;
A dream-scape for the weary minds when a soul weakens slowly being leeched

Give some and take some a balance for the loathsome;
That will never happen in the case of the lonesome
When one feels living means just to slowly die;
Evaporates like water, a sorrowful rain as they cry

I give no answers I ask no questions;
I seek for the truth with my own explorations
I bleed out hope I breathe in faith;
To survive a life of a never ending hate

I am tripping on a corner watching the whole world spin;
As I wrap myself with smoke, the suicidal taste of nicotine
When boredom strikes casting me my final moment of doom;
Eventually I realize things are redundant as I lock myself in this room

What a beautiful way to live life only to feel you're dying;
So shut the hell up my friend!Stop preaching we both know you're lying
Bearing the cross, carrying the weight of the world on my shoulder;
Holy mother of christ it gets worst as I get older...

My dreams turns to a living nightmare everyday I hang my ambition to this gallows;
I sentence me to death!Taking away my existence so the rest will follow
Never before I contemplate what's with the issues I'm having I gladly surrender;
In the cold embrace of death in the name of thy father, the son and the holy spirit may I shall be remembered

Tell me your darkest secrets;
I promise that I will keep
Whisper me all your unspoken words;
Let me break the silence where your heart silently weep

Surrender me a smile just to know that you're okay;
Even if it means the last time of faking, I am here to stay
Let me into your world, painting colors to your void memories;
And never again feel misery, lets turn your mind into a sanctuary

Deeply breathing together we held hands purifying our soul;
A prayer, we meditate disposing negativity.. A bad aura to let go
A moment of silence, shaking the person once we was;
Let them all troubles crumble, pulverizing sorrow to dust

Expanded consciousness makes us grow stronger and push further;
The path to serenity, a peace of mind where all the letdowns will never be remembered
Yet...Yes it's a scar that always remain, a part of growth and a sign of divine intervention;
We may take wounds but will never fall...Between rise and fall there is always a contradiction

So fall forward to a better man;
Don't give up as much as you can
The least you worries, the least you grow;
What I mean was do something about instead it just undermine the sorrow...

I open my umbrella when I am indoor;
As I break mirrors
I spill salt on sore;
While walking under ladders..
I let black cats pass me by
I write 3 for a tragedy;
As 666 spokes the life out of me..
I go out on fridays when the date strikes 13
I have been having bad luck ever since I was 15...

The stars in the sky;
Falls along with the tears in your eyes
Catching colors in black and white;
Remembering the love we had that night...

The faults and regrets;
They kept on shaking all the thoughts in our heads
Flashing memories we tried to forget;
Waking up with you alone in this bed

Tell me where did we go wrong?
Tell me why you've leave me alone?
I'm waiting here for you to come home
The only place our hearts belong

Tell me how'd it come to be?
Tell me that you're missing me?
I can't believe it has to end
We thought our love can never end

Love is like a falling star;
Shining with false hopes and promises are bound
A wish came true with a mark of scars;
Never again to fall once it meets the ground

From the depths of hell
Where I slowly fell
A deal made with the devil
As I started tossing pennies in a well

But the angels came and broke my fall
Saved me from sinking, down this hellhole
The life I sold is more precious than gold
That my friend is what I saw,life is now more clearer and bold

But after all upon throwing them all
Before the saving and breaking of my fall
I drowned in fame,money and ***
for 7 years I ruled the world as it rise to an apex

But then downfall and recollection came tormenting my soul
Hellhounds came gnarling,scratching and waiting at my bedroom door
Regrets starts falling alone with my tears as I prayed for salvation
Never thought God listened, As the angels descent ended my damnation

The devil is a salesman and you're a valued costumer
Starts thinking 7 times before you go and starts to barter
For your soul is more precious than what you think you'll be having
God gave me a second chance never thought my soul is worth saving

We give thanks,love,hate and contemplate things we feel and receive;
We act accordingly to the emotions life is offering, as we journey and continues to live
While aging to some is sorrowful, that life is slowly taken coming to an end;
But with a positive insights and faith, knowledge as we grow old is truly a godsend.

We don't have to ask questions where we neglect to accept the answers;
What are we hearing is just the plain truth, yet lies comforts us best at times of despair
It doesn't have to always look that way...With an open mind, and a soul that learned to accept;
The eagerness to live more to understand, fortifies the will stronger and can see through any depth.

We measure life according to our ground...
How it feels like, to feel lost and be found
Where some halted their will and closed their mind;
Waiting on a crossroad, while they feel life has left them behind...

This journey that we all walk are the same, a way to serenity and salvation;
No matter where you go just keep holding on to your faith and choose a direction
Eventually you'll find that the fall you're suffering is just another God's call;
Believe and follow the signs, never to question...Just accept that this is how life rolls.

So never feel confined locking your thoughts in a room;
Never feel lost, no matter what stop casting your own doom
Life is a map to travel and we are all just a drifter;
One day we will find our place to stop, lay rest and settle.

I want to make love like fire melting the snow of winter;
And turn this coldest night burning like the sun in summer
No longer! Together we will escape the world of hate together;
Join me baby let us unite our heart and stay in this dream forever.

I just want to be with you
Wanted to hold you
The way that I used to

I miss your kiss
The touch of your lips
While I hold your hips
Exchanging body heat

We make love like fire melting ice
The coldest night turns warm as I look deep in your eyes
Your sweet embrace have shown me the light
To a new beginning, will start tonight

Like moth to flames we willingly burn
All our fears,from this moment we yearn
To not let go craving for love and lust
While we both wish this will never last

We slip into each other with legs tangled tight
The feeling of bliss made this love burning bright
We moans and whispers surrendering ourselves
We reached our peek, both went deeper we delves

We both know that this feeling can go on forever
Even to some it means next to never
But how can we express this new found sanctuary
Where our heart and soul rest now for serenity

I don't wanna die unfulfilled and empty;
I should live my life now or I will never be
Someone destined to make a change;
We are just a spec in time etching a name on a henge

Life is not a waiting room just so you know;
We must learn to hold onto something and learn to let go
A story involving you and me in a one big show;
God is the witness as we all walk life and learn to grow

Forever and ever a scar one way or another will always remain;
A reminder that we took a wound we cause ourselves just to stay sane
So we know that we are still alive by the methods of feeling pain;
God help us for insanity sometimes is what we only have to maintain...

Contemplations and thousand questions why seek answers we don't want to hear;
What's the truth we are looking for is already here breathing, closer than a tear
The one that falls from our eyes every night we feel troubled and praying for guidance;
But then every day we walk the lines of blasphemy and complete defiance...

So what do we want?We want heaven but we live like hell?;
So what do we need?We neglect to stand sometimes but easily grasp the ground where we fell?
Staying as low as we can and cowering deep, instead of looking up and reach for a climb;
So my friend start making up your mind cause' all life offers one thing and it's called "time"...

Into the sunlight burning my pale tainted skin I fall;
Out from the darkness I lived where I walk before I crawl
I'm a being no man can describe yet I am marked as a horror;
I meant no harm but this is how I live a cycle causing' terror

Understanding my nature is like a puzzle picture a piece is always missing;
Dig deeper and you will find the answers right before your neck, blood will start gashing
Never will I myself will ever understand why am I brought to this world and for what purpose?;
For the balance perhaps? That we all must accept that light and darkness never coexist and that what truth has exposed...

Sacrifice what a noble suffering one can offer for love and devotion;
What I do now, will it set the order for safety and to create a new world in motion?
I doubt one can even notice or even give credit to my self righteous suicide;
I'm a fool to even care so much that I am ready to give my life for violence to subside...

Maybe I am just tired living in the shadows creeping in the night to feed;
I envy men for their freedom that I even often ask what's the difference they also live in greed
Why must I care so much for their safety?I am living the life I am offered so are they;
But why am I feared the most for their violence is worst yet I am the only one known as a monster...

Too late to ponder more, I made my choice so long and goodbye I bid farewell;
It is a good day to die funny it's the first time I see the sunlight and touched my skin burning them well;
Blood is boiling like acid tearing my bones melting as I feel pain as I scream;
Freedom it is this the end of me to the earth I return as ashes filling an urn to the brim.

Out from the ashes and into the sun;
Back from the beginning where life has begun
Soaring high and mighty with flames scorching out;
From its wings the beauty flown away with into the south.

Rebirth is the cycle this bird only knows;
Each time it rises the flame within grows
Stronger,brighter colored red orange and yellow;
Circling around the skies forming rings and halos.

A cry will shake the sleeping land of humanity;
That hopes will again part along with eternity
Once again man will know that there's no point of giving in;
We will rise back up again from where we cower be free from the darkness within.

If this is heaven... Please send me back to hell;
What I've done here to no one I will never tell
The goodness I've become is impossible after the deadly seven;
I was worst than the devil himself ever since I reached the age of eleven.

Why must I wish to be back where evilness only what I know to do?
Perhaps it's because I am someone when I was me and I belong only to the few
But I must also know that there's a time in my life where I prayed to a sleeping God;
I never knew my parents name in an orphanage I grew up and loneliness was the best company I had...

Now that I am old waiting for my final hours writing down all my sins keeping a note of goodness;
Although that note is empty perhaps it's because I doubted if what I've done are purity and sweetness...
I am now on my knees confessing, for the last 70 years of madness and angered soul;
Where I were hoping each day that God let out a lightning to strike me and have it all.

I remembered ******, clear as the tears now that falls down my cheeks;
That crashes down while my heart wails for forgiveness my lips don't move but my mind speaks
All of the crimes I've committed in cold blood, freezing my heart to feel no guilt as I smirk and grin;
I even dared the almighty to save that man's life while I gently squeeze the trigger,bullet pierces his chin...

I cannot recall more of those memories it makes me weep and finally feel the guilt;
I am still breathing yet I know I am already burning in hell my soul can feel the heat
All I ever do now,I'll say it again is waiting for my coming end while never a moment pass I've prayed;
And hope this diary will be read by God just in case, I fall to my death and in hell my soul decay...

I saw a cat runned over by a car call it a roadkill;
It seems that the driver enjoyed it came back a bit just to feel
The pain the poor cat is suffering,twitching as it gasp for air to breathe;
Even knowing that life will never come back still curious till' the cat's heart stop to beat.

So I came to think and ponder a bit while walking my way to work;
While still ****** and keep saying to myself that driver is a total ****!
He could have let the cat pass! Not pacing up for a merciless ****;
With a smirk to an evil grin while pretending he's sorry after quenching his thrill.

And so I told myself what if the devil was a lie and God do not exist?
So could this evilness that surrounds us is worst without judgment? Will it ever be cease?
With a mind worst than the so called devil himself sitting on a throne ruling the entire land;
Without a soul to be tormented waging wars giving orders! Fierce like a beast with an iron hand.

The world will never rest and keeps spinning as bloodshed and chaos revolves around;
If goodness is only meant to be for the weakest heart then what's the point of love being unbound?
I had enough of this thoughts so I'm just going to continue living for what it is there for me tomorrow;
I kept holding onto my faith that there is a God that keeps saving us and relieves our pain and sorrow.