Send someone to me
Someone who can warm me with kisses
Send me someone who will sit with me when my legs don't work
Someone who will teach me how to love myself like they love me
When I shatter someone who will pick up the pieces and use their kisses as glue to stick me back together
Send me someone who is ready to be loved
But most importantly send someone to love me
Whether its at 2 in the afternoon or tangled in the sheets on Sunday
Just send someone who will want me shattered or whole

I hope you know Grandpa it's been 5 years and whenever I'm upset I still  imagine you hugging me

I hope you know its been 5 years and I still haven't stopped missing you

"I guess, I love you"
"You don't have to love me"
"I do but you see when you say you love someone it gives them the opportunity to hurt you worse than ever before"

I love angles now for some reason
Maybe because a right angle will always be 90 degrees
Maybe because I relate to the obtuse angle too much
or
Maybe it's cause when we look at numbers maybe we finally add up to something

Maybe I love the rain because someone else is finally crying with me

Maybe I'm scared of thunder because I'm too used to my shine being screamed at

I dream of being a skeleton
tracing out each rib with my fingers
holding my thigh between my thumb and forefinger
to study the human bone structure by looking in the mirror

I dream of the day my waist size is too small for a size 00
when my hip bones can balance trays on them
when the salewomen tell me all of the clothes here are too big for me
when I am full after half a salad

I dream of the day I look in the mirror and am confident I won't be called fat