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1
Pilar Orozco Oct 2018
1
Thoughts marinate in my mind becoming tender romanticism.
10
Pilar Orozco Jul 2019
10
I should’ve kept that bottle of pills
Feeling worthless
Do you even care how it affects me?
You never ask.
I always put your feelings first.
They’re more important because they’re more apparent I guess.
I have the same thoughts too.
You know that.
I’d like a drink too
I just need to forget my problems too
The need doesn’t pull me as strongly
Are your poems about me?
Are they about her?
100
Pilar Orozco Jan 24
100
What walls do I have to break through to get to you?
Will you even let me attempt to try?
101
Pilar Orozco Jan 24
101
It hurts so much more knowing I’m being purposefully ignored
102
Pilar Orozco Jan 24
102
My soul has been through enough
You might disintegrate it entirely
103
Pilar Orozco Jan 24
103
I’m dumbfounded by your enigmatic, dual state
104
Pilar Orozco Jan 25
104
I think about you too much
I want you too much
105
Pilar Orozco Jan 25
105
I’m a walking corpse
Your kiss was the only thing that made me feel alive again
106
Pilar Orozco Jan 25
106
Your lips on mine
My hands on the back of your neck
Your hands on my back
My dream becoming reality
107
Pilar Orozco Jan 26
107
We’ve skipped a few steps
Now we’re in limbo
108
Pilar Orozco Jan 26
108
Turns out
I’m nothing
To anyone I want to matter to
109
Pilar Orozco Jan 28
109
It won’t hurt my feelings
I don’t have any left
11
Pilar Orozco Jul 2019
11
I feel you miss her.

You say you love me.
It hurts regardless.
You make me feel like I interrupted your probably would be back with her relationship
110
Pilar Orozco Jan 29
110
Our lips fighting greedily for each other
Gasping for oxygen
Set ablaze
111
Pilar Orozco Jan 30
111
Going to the last marker
Skipping all the usual in between
Excluding my feelings is odd
I love sharing the time and cramped space with you
I hope you somewhat like me
I just want you to think I’m cool
It’s barely the beginning
I’m already scared about the end
112
Pilar Orozco Jan 30
112
I wonder how badly I’ll hurt myself this time
I can’t feel special just because we’re going through the motions
113
Pilar Orozco Jan 31
113
I want to know what’s in your head
I want to matter that much to you
114
Pilar Orozco Feb 1
114
Your validation feels like what I’ve needed my whole life
115
Pilar Orozco Feb 2
115
Your compliments make us almost seem real
I have to remind myself there is no us
116
Pilar Orozco Feb 2
116
I want someone to notice you’re happy
I want them to point it out to you
And I want you to realize it’s because of me
117
Pilar Orozco Feb 3
117
I’m microdosing
You’re lethal
You have no clue
118
Pilar Orozco Feb 3
118
It’s excruciating to just see you
I need to feel you
119
Pilar Orozco Feb 3
119
I cringe at all the parts of me you saw this weekend
12
Pilar Orozco Jul 2019
12
And now I have to go out there,
Pretending I’m okay
120
Pilar Orozco Feb 4
120
Nobody knows
That makes it more exciting
121
Pilar Orozco Feb 4
121
I’m going to bed
With you on my lips
122
Pilar Orozco Feb 4
122
Look at me pretending I don’t like you
123
Pilar Orozco Feb 5
123
Seeing you waiting there
For me
Nothing compares
124
Pilar Orozco Feb 5
124
My nothingness to you is nothing new to me
125
Pilar Orozco Feb 6
125
I want someone that I want and that wants me back
126
Pilar Orozco Feb 6
126
I can’t imagine you, thinking about me
I can’t imagine me, not thinking about you
127
Pilar Orozco Feb 6
127
The details bother me
I don’t know where your head is at
Tell me something that makes me feel special
128
Pilar Orozco Feb 8
128
You don’t think about me at all
It should hurt more
But it’s what I expected
129
Pilar Orozco Feb 9
129
I don’t want it to hurt anymore
I’m having those thoughts again
13
Pilar Orozco Jul 2019
13
I missed you today but I’ll see you tomorrow
130
Pilar Orozco Feb 9
130
I don’t think I’ll tell anyone
I’ll just go
Peacefully
131
Pilar Orozco Feb 10
131
My head and heart are strangers now
132
Pilar Orozco Feb 11
132
You to me-
A death blow
133
Pilar Orozco Feb 11
133
I agonize over the few mundane interactions we’ll have today
I want more
134
Pilar Orozco Feb 12
134
My mind is selfishly, unrelentingly strangling my will
135
Pilar Orozco Feb 12
135
I worry about you every night
I’m relieved when I see you in the morning
136
Pilar Orozco Feb 13
136
Wide awake with worry
137
Pilar Orozco Feb 13
137
I’m scared
What are you doing?
How could I ever change your mind?
Please don’t do it
Please don’t go
138
Pilar Orozco Feb 13
138
I have the possibility and opportunity for it
The only thing stopping me is the thought of being next to you
Sharing space and breath
139
Pilar Orozco Feb 14
139
I had two breakdowns
The sight of your smile was the ease for my pain
14
Pilar Orozco Aug 2019
14
You say I don’t understand.
Pain.
Yours and mine, you can’t take.
(A thought that frankly, ****** me off for f•ck’s sake)
Not realizing when your bad thoughts wake,
My being,
Eviscerates.
You’re trying to keep me out, to keep me sound.
But I want to know. To you, my heart is bound.
140
Pilar Orozco Feb 15
140
You’re never there when I need you
141
Pilar Orozco Feb 15
141
Just say you need me
142
Pilar Orozco Feb 16
142
I’m hurting
You know that
Why don’t you reach out to me?
143
Pilar Orozco Feb 17
143
Please come visit me in my dreams tonight
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