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Kai Nov 2024
Lies are all what people tell me
They act like I can barely see
How much lies they tell me

People tell me great stuff about myself
People tell me that I need to appreciate myself
Because of all I do 
But, it reminds me what I did to you
It's like my brain
Doesn't want me to obtain
The kind words someone gives me 
Instead, I'm supposed to believe that they are simply lying to me
It's just like my heart can't let me be

My brain tells me I need to believe them
While my heart says I can't believe them 
Paranoid of what to choose
I chose the *****
I chose to be indecisive
I hate being being indecisive
But that's who I am

I don't know who to believe
Or if I should even leave
And close the curtains
Or just leave the curtains
Alone

I feel like I'm drowning in decisions I don't even mean to make
My life is at stake
Just because of mistakes
I choose to make
Every decision I make comes with bricks
That's one of my conflicts
Bricks always in my palms
I can't always keep calm!
Why can't you people understand that?!

I feel like I'm getting closer to death
Closer...and closer to death
All conflicts are made by my mistakes
Now other's lives are at stake
But am I the person who actually created these *?
Even so
I always say sorry
I say sorry
Too much
All you do is munch
On my apologies
Like you're my allergies
You never forgave me
Don't act like I can't see

I don't even know if I should stop saying sorry
I keep on saying sorry
It feels useless
To not do any less
To do more
But I don't know anymore 

I don't know what to do anymore
expect mistakes because I'm tired
  Nov 2024 Kai
brooklynn
You change in the snap of a finger
you give pain
with your stinger
you can't see the pain
why can't you see
  Nov 2024 Kai
Liana
No one listened to her
When it was her turn to talk
So I look her in the eyes and say
"I'm listening"
And I wasn't kidding
11/22/24
Kai Nov 2024
My body seems uncontrollable
However, I'm always humble
Movements I cannot decide for myself
Words I cannot decide if I want to spill it out of myself
Jumping around all the time
To the point it feels like a crime
Then having a sugar crash
Sadly, not like the monster mash
Legs moving for no reason
To the point where it feels like a **** sin
It hurts
It hurts
Yet, I'm so addicted to this feeling
It's so appealing
Almost as if it were a drug
But it's simply just a stomach bug

Moving till I can't breathe
Moving till I break my feet
Head is spinning
Dreaming...
...I want more...
But I can'̶t̶  handle anymore
I want more
Muscles are tensing against my skin
My flesh feels like a trash bin
Until my skin burst
That's definitely not the first!
Movement is like the electricity
Supply for the city
While I'm the TV
Part of the city





I don't want to stop
Stop
STOP!!
I don't want to stop!
Why should I?
Look me deep in my eyes
Why should I?







Laughing as I dance around in my room
Not ever messing with my broom
Peak insanity crossing the road to my home
Introducing them to their new home
Uncontrolled movements as I rush
Grabbing my hair brush
Brushing their hair until my wrists breaks, blood leaking out of my wrists
My wrists
Looked like they were practically cut in half
Just like how my body was cut in half!


Tired
Drained
From all the pain
Yet, I can't find the remote to control my body
Help me find my own body
It's uncontrollable

It hurts
Please, it hurts
Put me back together
I'll be able to be controlled if you put me back together
I'll give you the remote control for you
You can do whatever you want to do
Just please, it hurts
It hurts
It burns
BRO I WAS TRYING TO MAKE SPECIAL CHARACTERS FOR THE POEM TO LOOK COOL AN OMINOUS BUT HELLO POETRY **** DI- AND WON'T LET ME ADD THEM ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ
  Nov 2024 Kai
Nobody
I think I might not
Trust myself at all right now
Because why should i...
I'm too untrustworthy.
  Nov 2024 Kai
Nobody
ill
you can:
ill yourself
krill yourself
spill yourself
mill yourself
gill yourself
will yourself
jill yourself
fill yourself
hill yourself
till yourself
dill yourself
zill yourself
bill yourself
Lauryn Hill yourself
distill yourself
quill yourself
twill yourself
carboxyl yourself
shill yourself
shrill yourself


you cannot:
**** yourself

please don't
Kai Nov 2024
No one bats an eye at a ****** assault
Instead, they continue their meal at the dinner table as they pass the salt
"What were they wearing?"
"Why is everyone dreading?"
"It's not my fault they looked like a ****/*****."
"I want some more."
"It's their fault for wearing something like that."
"It's not my fault they looked attractive as they sat."
All disgusting words, said by people who don't have common sense
It's been like this since
Yet, no one bats an eye

No one bats an eye at murders
Killing all the mothers
And family members
But no one simply cares
All they do is inhale the air
Unlike the dead
Who has maggots in their head
Instead, they do nothing about it
They act like they don't care even a little bit
Police
Aren't protecting people from the beasts
Lurking in the open
They aren't in a singular pen

No one seems to care
All the women picking the bear
Because of violent and perverted "men"
Just like Benz
Who shouldn't even be considered "men"
Doing dangerous crimes like abuse, murders, SA, and more
They don't look like a pore
They look like a pimple
If I tried to make it more simple
The pimple desperately trying to make itself a pore
But they can't do anymore
They stick out like loose strands
Yet, no one bats an eye at these strands

No one bats an eye at evil individuals
They considered them "normal/average individuals"
Yet, they are dangerous
Please stay safe! Crimes are becoming more of a problem, more than 300,000 children kidnapped yet the years before had 1,000-3,000 children kidnapped. This is insane. Please stay safe!
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