I have been wearing the ocean all-day
With the salty water of denied piled up thoughts, unsaid words and unexpressed emotions, painful yet invisible wounds, and endless but dried tears.
I am thrilled about the feeling when the power of this misery will turn these massive tides into a tsunami, ends up everything which is left of me.

Walking in the rain, without an umbrella
Such nights can be Therapy or suffering

For my body, this is the remedy
Every drop soaks my skin, helps me feel.
the serenity of dripping water is like chill runs through my spine.
mazarine color of sky relaxed my heavily breathing body.





For my soul, it is the misery
Amplifying even every tiny pain,
The Rain havoc and its thundering noise
annihilates the existence of the surrounding world.
Screams of my tormented spirit are becoming audible to me.
The scars gifted from this world started bleeding again.

feeling hiraeth in me,
having a battle every day for
living in a world where I don't belong,
Life was never as easy as they told,
As the first ray of sun
Touches the earth,
The battle begins
Daily we meant to be covered
In another layer of expectations
Molded by the pressure of society
To be the "perfect piece of art"
All the chaos of competition, force us to be
In our comfort zone,
The feeling hiraeth in me,
having a battle every day!

I still hear your flirting voice
In that train journey
You filthy stranger with a breathtaking smile.


Sitting on my seat on my cellphone screen
I suddenly notice a sharp gaze
Oh, it was you
A boy with black dusky hair, in beachy shirt and shorts.


You felt like "a little sun" to me in between those "cold wintery" people
When you spoke, finally breaking the silence.
Your sugary words, made the surrounding smells like a marshmallow.

Your way of talking is too smart as well as silly
Opens a door to a different crazy world forme.
always a very poised girl was laughing like a cute drunkard,
Is that you or your appearance or your voice that makes me high.

I looked for you
In every new person, I met
But as the moon in the early morning,
You had disappeared.


now with the hope, it will be you,
Let's meet strangers, in another train journey to worth remembering.

Thoughts are running through the mind
Controlling my emotions and actions.

Unexpressed thoughts have a tighter grip over my brain than my own self.

This "not so firm" grip is turning into fire
And is slowly slowly burning my emotions into ashes.

This is exactly what happens when I am not able to write.

Yes they are sad and perhaps they make people sad too

Few say stay away from negative people, their influence is a curse

Yeah they are like blade they cut flesh and create wounds

Yeah, their talking is alike saltwater on that nasty wound.

If they pour their heart out, they are attention seekers
They are a failure because they can't help themselves from drowning in their own mind.


But are these people different from me and you?

The inertia is killing me

Not only because things didn't turn out as I planned
But I have started losing hope for my peace
Or I shall work more hard before things I hold would get a release.

Will I be ever able to see the road I am walking with this existing fog around me,
Or this blurred vision would decrease all my chance to see?