Why do I rhyme
Why do I write
I honestly don't know
And never will
I guess words are the useless power
Of this useless cold-blooded coward
That writes random sentences beneath
The cold water of the cold shower
Why do I do this
Why don't I just ask for help
I honestly don't know
And never will
I can only guess it all started
That morning I woke up
After hours on the bathroom floor
How?
I honestly don't know
And never will
I just remember the bruise on my head
And in my head, that bruise is still there
When I went back to my bed
I knew it wasn't there
But I still saw bloodshed
Shed blood atop my sheets
Why?
I honestly don't know
And never will
I guess its that disgusting scent
That disgusting sentiment
That urge to write one line
About anyone I've known
Or ever will
I've longed for a punishment
That will test this writer's will
They say heaven will
But they're dead,
To me at least

As I stay here,
I speculate
In the frontier of thought,
I contemplate
What I brought to the world,
I concentrate
On what I unfurled and now display,
I consummate
What I portray and feel,
I dominate
What I reveal,
I denominate
What is real,
But still,
I nominate
What is surreal,
I oscillate
I change what is ideal for me,
I isolate myself
In the highest degrees,
I desolate
With the finest move of the pen,
What I create.

I state again
With each day I improve,
My lexicon
I dilate,
I’m commenting on
What I approve,
I’m obsessing on
What I want to disprove,
I’m expressing
What I need removed,
I’m blessing
The words I reuse,
I’m addressing
What I deduce.

Words are:
Complicated,
Herds
Of verses,
Cursed,
Voiceless,
Surds and sonants,
Dramatized,
Emoted,
Intoxicated,
Reiterated,
Literal and figurative,
Alliterated,
Raided and stripped naked,
Related,
Equipped,
Gripped,
Awakened,
Jaded,
Created,
And to create.

I’m broken down,
I’m broken to the ground
I look around and see people like me
Carbon copies that can walk, talk, and see
I keep thinking if I will die like this,
I’ve been thinking if I will live like this.

I don’t understand
Why my life is so bland,
Everything is banned
Nothing is in my control
Nothing is in my hands
I don't know my role
In the undiscovered land of the future
What is my goal
My life is made in a factory,
Canned.

As my knowledge expands
With mastery
I withstand
The worst is firsthand
It's on demand
Unplanned
But with one action
It starts all over again.

During life, I lost my traction
Almost inactive
Maybe it was some distraction
Quite attractive
Some kind of transaction
That was the start of my putrefaction.

I was chained
I couldn’t leave
I was restrained
I tried to believe
Yet, those thoughts couldn’t be maintained
I was naive
It was Ingrained
That I wouldn’t be reprieved
I was shamed
Called names
Of which my own was stained
I remember it frame by frame
Bad thoughts reined
And the rainstorm came
And it remained
But changes forms
And extinguished the flame
That burnt inside me
The punishment was still not relinquished
I still was anguished,
Fallen,
Forgotten,
Trodden,
Rotten,
Broken.

I walk down the misty streets
Trying to find me something,
Sometimes I feel like a hit and miss
I go back home
I seat near the lit fireplace
It’s near midnight
It’s getting late
My bones are crumbling
The only sound I hear is the fire crackling.

It’s near 2 o’clock
I want to eat
However, my legs are weak and I cannot get up
Turn on the television
News roundup
The type of stuff I never pick up
“The crime was a setup”
Oh god, where has humanity ended up?

It’s near 3 o’clock
My patience is out of stock
Now that I started this…
I'm locked down
Trying to resist
Not everything can be resolved with fists
I could try to make myself a list
Nevertheless, there is a twist
I cannot coexist
With me.

It’s 4 o’clock
Should I get a drink?
There is some near the sink
I drag my sleepless body to the kitchen
Oh god this place stinks
Stinks of cheapness, shoddy
I could drink it all in a blink
I embody the alcoholic.

It’s 5 o’clock
I am neurotic,
Psychotic,
Idiotic...
I always hated this behaviour
Quite so hypnotic
I have been told I was a failure
Now I taste the flavour
Of misbehaviour
Of which I savour
I am no saviour.

It’s morning
I have work
I have this quirk
And I don’t know why now I smirk
I guess I avoid it
But the thought still lurks
Now I sit here destroyed
Maybe now,
Unemployed.

We’re the same
In our own different ways,
We could fly away
And go to space
Wondering around faster than light

I look upon the abyss
That I once called home,
I stare at the place
That was the birth of my race,
The sun shines bright,
The moon is gone,
I feel the pain in my bones,
I see the vastness of space,
I hear the emptiness of space,
I think about the expressions on their faces,
I think about the expressions of your face

The unknown is scary,
But the discovery is gorgeous
Each galaxy,
Each star,
Each planet,
Each race,
Each face,
They’re all important
In their own way
There’s no useless life form

In the infinite space
Never ending disgrace
No one will help us.

Do I really control myself?
Am I crazy as hell?
I am looking forward,
But everything I see is backward.
Did I mess it up?

Oh, I’m escaping from reality
I’m flying
Now, I’m just falling
How?
Life is lie,
They are lying.

Do you really control yourself?
No, you don’t…
Am I crazy as well?
Does life make any sense at all?
So with the snap of their fingers
You fall down
But, how?

Do we really control ourselves?
Are we just one of billions on the shelves?

Did you ever question why we are here?
Do we just create for our own sake?
Do we just try to create mean to the meaningless?

I used to prey
All day
Waiting for that moment
That my world would turn
But until now
It didn’t come.

I can’t rest,
I can’t stay alive,
I’m lonely on my nest,
I’m locked in a chest,
I left all my friends aside.

They used to talk
About the beautiful ride of life,
They said that there were ups and downs,
So you are saying my life didn’t leave the ground.

I was really young,
I couldn’t understand why
Life is easy for you and hard for me.

I couldn’t leave
I was stuck inside of my own cell,
I was alone on my own shell,
I don’t own my own life,
The only that is left is what you see outside.

I am alone,
Just Me, Myself and I.