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VOID Feb 9
a cold body rotting is all I am
bone decaying
flesh falling into the atoms they are
slowing turning into dust
casket 6 feet deep
tears from fake friends fall
everyone dressed in black
my lovers front row
to watch the body the once made love to sitting in eerie silence
cold and alone they will stand
unware of how broken I was
Don't be sad
Don't cry
when my body returns to the earth that birthed me
VOID Feb 4
love is so free,
free to give
free to receive
the sun hums when you're around
the grass dances along with your steps
the sky glows and grins with your smile
It takes every ounce of will from stopping me from fall face first
into your arms and safety
his eyes stare at the lips he is scared to kiss
I can see dark thoughts overwhelming him like clouds rolling in and getting ready for a storm  
I fear of hurting you
but the opposite if love is fear
so I open my eyes and head straight towards your affections
because I am so eager to discover the depth of your love
VOID Feb 3
I pour everything I have into forgetting the taste of your name when I wakeup
I spill all my blood trying to erase your words of love you filled my body with
I rip the flesh you have touched and I am letting them scab over
This is healing
I grow every day I don't hear your voice
I flourish on the days your memories don't have time to surface
I will never sit at the bottom of the stomach of a beast ever again
I will kick and stab my way out of the next controlling chains I am put in
I am stronger without the help of my abuser
I do not miss the way you hurt me
I do not miss the taste of own blood
I do not miss the way you said sorry after screaming until your lungs bruise
VOID Feb 3
I only miss you late at night, in the comfort of my own room
since you've been gone
I've slept next to the most beautiful soul to you I could find
He sleeps every night to the sound of rain and thunder
I've found comfort in this because since you left I've become a storm
but he admires this about me
all the chaos you couldn't handle
he does with pleasure
He tells me my soul is a deep lilac color and he feels it when our skin touches
I've never been admired like the art my hands create
I haven't cried about you since the day I hung up the phone
not one single tear I think you deserve
I would wish you the best but I am too far away to touch now
VOID Feb 1
we eat the nickles and irony taste of the trip
lights fill the room like laughter and I see his smile glow
He looks at me with such realness and intimacy
I kiss down his spine, while whispering good energy into his ear, blowing love into his thoughts like a balloon
my curves lay exposed from lack of clothing
we like it this way, clothes tend to reflect our shame
and tonight our shame was healed, and our life together has begun
a new chapter has been written in my story
experiences I can only feel when young
we whisper about why we are catching feelings, communication has never been this clear before
his shirt looks so good on my soft skin
he admires every cell on my body
souls at peace
tripping and falling for you  
patterns kiss your checks just like my lips
under blankets
breathing hope into me
I hope this feeling never ends
VOID Jan 29
The familiar feeling of falling in love
Happens too quick
Trying to stop myself from falling face down at rock bottom
You breathe hope into me like CPR
And fill my head with thoughts of us like a balloon
The sounds of affectionate names replay like a scratched CD
Frustrating that guards are being let down  to let you in
VOID Jan 28
when a boy says I love you in the back of a car on a drunken night
wait to say it back
because loving should never be shy
but the desire to be accepted for the broken soul you are might just be enough to convince yourself to let your guard down
hand your self-esteem to him like a coat when you enter an unfamiliar home
lose track of the days when your mind is a calendar
he slowly unravels your habits just to switch up your maze you've memorized
he wants you with stained hands with the color of his lungs  
be strong enough to give yourself time before saying it back
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