Sometimes the voice isn’t being heard through a poorly built wall.
A system in place to keep one away and capture the lone wolves.
The breath beats to the other side of my heart and damage is done.
There is nothing to go back to bothersome or the words were infected.
Full of nothing, but careless actions from dismissive thoughts to destroyed bridges.

I burnt my bridges and my tongue from speaking to you.
Finding a voice of my own in these flowers is impossible if I’m burning inside.
If the flames never came back or held a special sacred place to death.
My picture frames of childhood was ripped out of the book and burned in the woods with the rest.
I forgot my old self and my old soul with poorly preserved to maintain the bones of one.
Child.

Cold and fostered.
Kept with the flesh and blood heartaches.
You made my heartache with a simple paper.
A simple word instead and the yellings of my actions.
I condemn you in my mind as not a good mother.
No near definition can be defined by how I feel or how you feel.
No words being said, only arguments not guaranteed of winning.
Coming out of the fight and choking on the rest.
The author proclaims the meaning from the sacred and the peace.

Told me to research a word definition on Google.
When the foul definitions represent the devil.
I repel that I won’t remain in the conscious part of your life.
The path you wanted me to take has ruins and marks into silver bones.
I stand deeply in my room being filled with peace instead of torture.
Sadness call it backwards in my feelings.
Ruined the heart of a child.

Words beyond my sentences are unreadable.
Misunderstood beyond the comprehension limit.
Give it a push and they fall into the water with no meaning.
No value or purpose in the world.
Doubt it makes a difference.
A trick to play on the reader.
To make them feel something about these words.
Beyond the capsule it is uncomprehending to read.
To create words that cry for help.

I’m too good at throwing words away.
Making them feel unseen if that’s how I truly feel.
How I truly hide my feelings disregard their existence.
Once setting something in this world it becomes visible.
Weighing deeply upon the heart.
These words are a catalyst to the balance that is held in-between them.

Sometimes I barely open the door up knowing it’s the words that pull me down.
It’s an unknown entity that positions their expectations on me.
Weighing me down and yet I feel blinded in their clouds.
While they look like normal clouds to me they are more than clouds.
A cold set a stone.
Time away from the break.
Philosophy is difficult in defeat.
Defend impending.
Soul crushing.

The drift from missing a piece of poetry to living my life casually indiscreetly.
It always questions myself, as the string leads nowhere but at the bottom of my balcony.
The settled tip of the moment that doesn’t involve people or loudly looking up.
Capturing the sky with a gentle hug and pulling from the counter.

I’m fond of moments where you don’t see creators, artists or writers constantly on their knees.
Knowing that people got their message straight directly centered around likes.
Sometimes the ingenious is noticed, but I don’t say anything.
They replay this message inside of your head wanting you to press the like button.
The obligation just hits a multitude of things that aren’t seen on the surface.

The tug and tap you see on each version of the screen.
The cold ability to notice the torture on the other side.
No say.

Some parents I forget, and forgot.
Their purpose in life and my life too.
I wish I could tell you how brutal I feel.
My emotions threaten to spill out each time, I wish I told you.
Take a better glimpse of it and show you what you really mean to me.
Sometimes I take my own parents for granted because they didn’t accept my truth.
They didn’t know their child told them their feelings and stood there not listening.
I felt crazy and a half on days that brought me over fearing trauma at stakes.
For sake, don’t bruise me or let your own daughter down.

Don’t let your son down either and keep it pushing.
Running away from the everlasting truth.
It absorbs the night freights you were scared of taking the truth.
You made a whole bunch of lies trailing to your off-bed.
Told me I lied, but I knew you did.
I’m just that perceptive and self-aware as you think I’m not.
People simply think those things because I play video games all day.
That I don’t know right from wrongs or stops from going.
Ah..

You just don’t know me that well.
What gifts I have in store and how much of a thinker I am.
It’s tragic how you think you know me:
Just a lone perspective of what the tiger thought above.
I might not know you, as you think I don’t.
Convince yourself I don’t know anything, but I know many things.

You ain’t going to keep gripping my heart and holding me back from my potential.
You ain’t going to call me a “gangster” everytime I do something you don’t find fit.
Is that all you ever say to yourself?
Something you pull out of yourself thinking it’s a good look for you as a parent?
**** you are immature as hell.
Immature people who didn’t think maturity came at a young age sometimes.
I know what you fail to know.

I don’t know everything, I know.
I know what you fail to realize.
What your ego misses to get.
The big picture inside of the small picture.
All the time you twist my words because I don’t agree with you.
Listen up though, I ain’t going to be around forever.
Soon I’ll move on and I won’t tell you once this relationship is over.
I won’t tell you if you ruined it or not.
I won’t tell you anything but moving in pitch silence.

Sorry, but I don’t feel bad.
I feel dedicated to my craft and voice.
Getting it out there in the world.
You thought you silenced me.
Kept me in the freezer didn’t you?
You thought..
You just thought things..
:)

A simple cloth defined as a ghost.
I am heard from the occurrence in the waves.
The shadow that foreshadows my intuition.
What should I say?
I’m confused if I mean anything.
A human being or someone in the darkness.
I feel like I’m walking alone in the sand taking in the dust and the rain.
I almost doubt myself and my surroundings.

I wanted to go back home, but my soul stayed here.
I am used to it, but never as used to it as I know.
You thought you knew me and my life, but you only lived in it.
You lived in it and sunk once you uncovered me in deeper complexities.
I don’t think one realizes how safe I feel, but once I leave I feel no longer a human of myself.
Am I a human?
Once was a human, but turned into a void in the world.

A hole in my heartbreak handles the strokes painted on the wall and the paint I threw.
I didn’t throw it though I left it and someone framed me.
Became me and told me I wasn’t worth your time.
I didn’t know my thoughts mattered to you, I thought I didn’t matter anyways.
Not actively thinking like that with a timer in my head, but you reminded me to dig deeper.

Those words are the color to my black and white area of ****** hearts hit and flicked on the wall.
They told me I wasn’t worth your energy and time.
Told me I was different and sometimes you don’t know me.
Sometimes I barely know you, yet I attach to you.
How do I unattach myself and let go?
Is this normal?
Is it?

It doesn’t feel like that.
I was just stuck inside of my mind.
An all-black figure on the sidelines chasing you.
Now I’m looking at someone else, but I didn’t mean to be dramatic.
How to be what I was going to be when I did feel the emotions.
I felt positive energy.
I can’t easily put my feelings into words.

Yet I feel so held back on what I choose.
Do my choices matter to you?
My feelings matter to you?
My thoughts matter to you?
My heart matters to you?
Did it ever?
Did I ever feel something?
Was I ever okay?

I wish I was..
I wish I was.
If I meant anything to you..
I appreciate it..
The type of thing that is hard to bare my soul.
Bare that your kindness makes me question if I felt like this..
Your kindness makes me feel different..
what’s even different..

The times I wish I just gave up and stopped chasing you.
Endlessly bringing me to the void that I was once in.
The void to me is a space to express unexpressed feelings and thoughts that linger in the breeze of forever.
Sometimes I don’t understand how I feel like this or are filled to the brim of uncertainty.
How you mean so much to me and I only had a glimpse of you for a year.
I’m still trying to find my words, as they are lost in the depths of my heart.

I still find the running sink haunted in my own head, as the door twists open.
I didn’t feel so exposed within its draining darkness of walls.
This was a simple message or poem of moving on, not something more.
Although every time I write about you, I feel something else.
Different types of words to express the inclusion and background of the person I fall into.
The kind of seeking cannot express how clarity comes into the beings of consciousness.
The kind of thinking can’t conclude if self-expression and the self helps to know that you exist.

In this world, I feel like a forgotten entity.
I should let go, but I don’t know how.
The string should just cut itself, but I see it can’t.
Without the pair holding onto the scissors.
Yet I don’t know when I’ll reconnect with you in silence.
The space is within deafening ears and distance that holds to you.
My eyes when imagining you, I can see myself reaching out for you.
With what means a longing and unfiltered light of how I feel.

I don’t want to sound like I’m chasing a person who isn’t worth my time.
Who isn’t what you see, when you look at me.
For myself isn’t yours, or mine to see.
So the inside is condemned and dimmed with lanterns.
Laughs sprawl out and now I feel scared of this turning point.

Call me crazy or any negative word.
Call me whoever you like.
I don’t like how I see myself and I don’t know what I mean to you or what you mean to me.
I’ll keep going, maybe.