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Feb 6 · 149
Feelings Changing
Vesper Feb 6
I don't think
That I just like girls anymore
But I don't know what I know
I think people will find out
I think people will know
I'm very confused
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Feb 3 · 112
fucked up
Vesper Feb 3
****** up mind
****** up life
****** up world
it seems like everything is terrible nowadays
Feb 3 · 131
happy snow
Vesper Feb 3
looking out my window at night
watching the snowflakes fall like frozen tears
wiped away from a crying face

i walked outside to catch snowflakes in my mouth
happy for the first time in while
smiling- a real one this time
not just a fake upturned mouth

rushing inside to tell my sister
seeing my mom smiling
seeing my dad sleeping
i love being happy
i wish
i was happy every day
Feb 2 · 51
Untitled
Vesper Feb 2
the tears fallen create pools and lakes
shimmering blue in the new day sun
dripping from my face like rain droplets
flowing from clouds of fluff
no, i dont think this life is for me
Jan 27 · 63
Not knowing why
Vesper Jan 27
Not knowing why
I try
Just to fail again
Get back up
Get pushed down
Not knowing why
Not knowing why...
Jan 25 · 42
Untitled
Vesper Jan 25
I don't know the path to take
I don't know the people to trust
For they all seem amazing
But under all that ****
They're all just Ghosts

They leave me when I most need it
I should have seen right through them
I don't know how I didn't see
The Ghosts

Even when I t'was younger
I never could have been more fonder
Of the Ghosts

Growing up I should have seen
The Ghosts
singing poems ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Vesper Jan 25
I have no words
For the fallen

I have no feelings
For the broken

For the fallen made others fall

And the broken made others broke

So when their crescent shine
Comes to a stop
The past fallen and broken on top
I was singing as i wrote this lol
Jan 23 · 1.2k
Fat
Vesper Jan 23
Fat
Sitting
Crying
Wishing less
Wanting more
I can't hide myself anymore
The sweatshirts too small
My body too big

Wishing the hurtful words would stop
Not just from you but me
I feel as if I'm going to pop

Skipping meals
Drinking soda
Eating salad
Having dessert

I tell myself that they don't notice
But I think they do
Jan 23 · 74
Bigger and Bigger
Vesper Jan 23
I cannot stop myself from giving in
To chocolates, to candies
And I just get bigger and bigger
"One more piece"
I tell myself
Jan 21 · 52
Believe in something
Vesper Jan 21
I have always wondered where we all came from.
Where we all were, before the big bang.
Such a slim chance, that we're all here today.
So here I think
I don't believe in god-
No-
I believe in something
Jan 21 · 98
Bad Poetry
Vesper Jan 21
I can't write poetry.
I want to write powerful things-
-But I cant.
I want people to see my poems-
-But they don't
I want to be okay without the affirmation of other people-
-But I'm not
And I can't understand
Why the last lines never come to me
Why I can't think of a powerful ending
I just can't
Write
Poetry
ik this aint gettin nothing either- 🥲
Jan 20 · 96
Depression
Vesper Jan 20
Depression, a multifaceted enigma, seeps into the crevices of existence, casting a shadow that lingers and weaves its intricate patterns within the mind. It's not merely a fleeting sadness but a persistent echo, resonating in the silent chambers of the heart, altering the very fabric of daily life. This condition, a complex interplay of genetics, environment, and experience, manifests uniquely in each soul, a tapestry woven with threads of emptiness, hopelessness, and disinterest in once-cherished pursuits.

The emotional toll of depression is profound, a heavy cloak that envelops the spirit, transforming joy into a distant memory. The world, once vibrant, now appears through a grayscale lens, where every breath feels burdensome, every step unsteady. Faces of loved ones blur, and the comfort of sleep is replaced by a haunting dread. The mind becomes a labyrinth, a maze of twisted paths leading to rooms where sorrow bathes, and hope flickers faintly like a distant star.

In the depths of this silent struggle, the body bears witness to the mind's turmoil. Chronic pain, digestive woes, and somatic echoes of the unseen battle further complicate the journey. Depression's presence is a whisper, a constant companion that isolates and alienates, feeding on societal stigma and misconceptions. The silent scream of the soul remains unheard, as the weight of judgment and misunderstanding stifles cries for help.

The causes of this somber state are as varied as the individuals it touches. Biological factors, intricate dances of neurochemicals, and hereditary shadows intertwine with psychological scars and environmental trials. Early traumas, chronic stress, and the harsh whispers of self-doubt blend into a symphony of despair. Yet, within this desolation lies a resilience, a glimmer of light that refuses to be extinguished.

The path to healing is a mosaic of therapies and treatments, a delicate balance of cognitive restructuring and chemical support. Medication, a balm for neurochemical storms, accompanies the guiding hand of therapy. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), a beacon in the darkness, helps to unweave negative thought patterns, offering new perspectives and hope. Lifestyle changes, like threads of gold, weave through the tapestry, adding strength to the fabric of daily life.

Social support, a lifeline, anchors the soul amidst the tempest. Friends, family, and support groups offer solace, understanding, and a sense of belonging. The journey is long and winding, marked by relapses and remissions, but hope remains a steadfast companion. Public health initiatives, advocacy, and open conversations about mental health shine a light on the path ahead, challenging stigma and promoting understanding.

Living with depression is an ongoing journey, a testament to the resilience of the human spirit. It requires patience, compassion, and continual self-awareness. Each step, though tremulous, is a testament to strength and courage. Advocacy and education play crucial roles in fostering a culture of empathy, breaking down barriers, and ensuring that no one faces this journey alone.

In the vast expanse of the human experience, depression is a deeply complex and multifaceted condition. Its shadows touch every aspect of life, but within the darkness, the dawn awaits. With comprehensive care, support, and awareness, individuals can navigate the labyrinth of depression and emerge into the light, finding hope and healing in the embrace of understanding and compassion.
Living with depression *****. Especially in your younger life. Earlier this year, I was diagnosed with depression. This has affected my life in so many ways, but I am pushing through it, and almost done with my process! Wish me luck! (this has been in progress for a while, and yes i did use some ai to help me find nice words, but just wanted to put it out there. (why does the ai thing say 77.4 ai ***))
Jan 20 · 44
Untitled
Vesper Jan 20
Who are we?
We are children of god!
He created us all!
The people with religions have answers
So why don't I?

Who are we?
We are the spirits of the earth!
Treat the world like you would treat your wife!
The environmentalists have answers
So why don't I?

Mabye
We're just
People?
Jan 20 · 251
1's and 2's
Vesper Jan 20
One is two
Three is four
And out the door I go
Before the low
I'll play a show
For you to laugh some more
little poem i came up with in my head (:
Jan 18 · 64
Untitled
Vesper Jan 18
You aren't the same
As you were
When we were kids

You aren't the same
Because when I saw you with her
You were different

So many things I want to say to you
Before you drift away
Like leaves in the wind

You left me on read again
Are you okay?
Is it that girl?
What happened to you?

Fifty-four calls
Thirty-six texts
You might have given up
But I haven't
Because I know that you
Are still that same little boy
Playing in the water
With me

And just like that
You're gone
Didn't even have the chance to say goodbye
I saw the news
That smiling face
Wish I could have seen it
One
Last..
Time....
Jan 18 · 39
Nothing
Vesper Jan 18
Please let me go
I want to see my family
My friends
My people
But I know as soon as I leave
I'll go back to my room
And cry again

Why can't I ******* do this
I know I can
I know I can
But I never do it

My father tells me
That the answer is to
"Just do it"
But I want an easier way
I don't understand
Why they never
Understand

Maybe I'm the problem
The one who doesn't understand
The one who never cared
About other peoples feelings
I've been called a sociopath
A *******
But I don't think I am
Am I?

I don't want to be nothing
I don't want to leave
Maybe it's better
If the masochistic sociopathic depressed sad angry nobody leaves.
Jan 18 · 58
472
Vesper Jan 18
472
There are times in stories
Where you think the story aught to end
But it don't
Sometimes I can relate that to poetry
Where the poem should end
Sound better that way
But I don't
Stop
Writing
Jan 18 · 57
Wishing
Vesper Jan 18
Wishing the voices would stop
Wishing the matrix to stop calling
Wishing to die-
But then come back
And do it all again
Vesper Jan 18
Will there ever be a day?
Where I do not live in fear?
Of your constant watch?

Will there ever be a day?
Where I find real love?
For more than a minute?

Will there ever be a day?
Where the shadows stop lurking?
Where the voices stop talking?

Will there ever be a day?
Where I figure this out?
Where I can fall down and rest?

Will there ever be a day?
Where I am truly alone?

Sometimes it feels
Like the days have passed
Slower and Slower
Faster and Faster
It feels like the days I aught for
Are already gone
Just a memory
Floating in the wind

So I keep wondering...
Will there ever be a day?
Jan 18 · 60
Snake-Like
Vesper Jan 18
You've got fangs
That sink into the skins of men
Poisoning them and thinking they really are someone
You've got scales
Slimy and Rigid
Ugly and Disgusting
You've got yellow eyes
Piercing gaze
Striking fear into the hearts of men
You're snake-like
You belong in a cage
To be laughed at
To be made faces at
YOU ARE A SNAKE
Jan 16 · 62
'Friends'
Vesper Jan 16
I thought I had lots of friends
But they were friends
Just not real ones

I tried to confide in one that I really trusted
Just water off a ducks back
I almost cried at another
'Dude. Stop crying.'

Back then I wished
To have more friends
I guess I wish they were real
Jan 16 · 39
Ups and Downs
Vesper Jan 16
Sometimes
We feel like falling down
Feel like screaming
Like crying
Like giving up

What's the point of life?
If it was all ups?
And no downs?

I bet it would be boring
I bet it would be sad
If there is no challenges in life
How are you supposed to grow?

That's the truth
We wouldn't grow
Become spoiled
Wanting more
What a sad life it would be
Without the Ups and Downs
Jan 16 · 58
712
Vesper Jan 16
712
What if you died instead
What if you cried instead
What if I was the one who lied
What if my wounds dried
What if you didn't have black eyes
I wish I hadn't said so many 'whys'
Now it's your turn to say the final 'goodbye'
Jan 16 · 152
Flowing
Vesper Jan 16
I don't know
    What's the flow
            It seems to take me further

                   Sometimes the flow is slow
            And other times
                                                                    Fast


                     It takes me to many places
                      That I cannot describe
              Full of color
                                                                  Love

                         I wish the flow would never end
                                 But it does
Jan 10 · 63
583
Vesper Jan 10
583
i spent so long
trying to find a way
but it only took me day
to find out that way was gone
Jan 10 · 143
crocodile tears
Vesper Jan 10
you cry so often
and for what do you cry for
you haven't experienced hardship
you haven't experienced pain
just not like i have
so stop crying those crocodile tears
and stop faking the friends
stop pretending like you are someone you aren't
and maybe you won't cry no more
Jan 9 · 43
Shoot.
Vesper Jan 9
Cold metal pressed against sweat.
Tears wetting my damp clothes.
Pitter-patter of rain against the ground as children sleep.
I cry for help, but no-one answers.
Shoot. Why can't I shoot.
Pitter-patter. More rain.
Damp shirt. More tears.
Why can't I end it all?
Every single night I scream.
It's so much easier this way.
SHOOT. WHY CAN'T I SHOOT.
I hear children laughing, and mothers loving,
I hear men working through the night, ready to go back to their families.
SHOOT. WHY CAN'T I SHOOT.
I hear a crack, and it all goes black.
Jan 8 · 101
biana
Vesper Jan 8
biana the *****
you broke my heart
even super glue wont help it this time
because now every day
every wish
11:11
is praying on your downfall
i know i shouldnt
but the buckets of tears i cried
say otherwise
if you felt this pain i felt
would you still look at me that same way?
Jan 6 · 52
Slurs
Vesper Jan 6
The slurs flow like water
Whenever I try to get you help
They feel like fire
But you don't care
We're still friends
Again & Again
More words
More pain
But if I walk away will you still be ok?
Jan 6 · 70
More & More
Vesper Jan 6
You give me so much
You make me happy
But I get mad
So often
So ******* often
It feels cold
When you cry
Because all i want is More & More
Again & Again
Will I ever be happy with what I have?
Jan 6 · 212
liar
Vesper Jan 6
liar
you said you loved me
liar
you said you would be there
liar
you said you would cheer me up
liar
you said you hated me
liar
you'll never leave me
liar
i'll teach you a lesson
liar
i hope you feel the pain i felt when the worlds collided and i was in between them
Jan 6 · 61
IM BACCCKCKCKC
Vesper Jan 6
I couldnt wait more that like two weeks to write poetry again sooooooooooo
Here i am

(:
Dec 2024 · 209
Goodbye. (for now)
Vesper Dec 2024
Hey guys! This is the last time that I will be on this website until at least February 2025. There is so much going on in my life, and i need to take a break from all my hobbies at the moment. I love you all!
<33

#PEACEOUT
Dec 2024 · 63
Suicide
Vesper Dec 2024
Growing up, I wondered why anyone would commit suicide. Why would you want to leave this earth? Why would you give up your beautiful life?
When I got a little over, I got scared of death. That made me appreciate life even more. Why would you want to **** yourself?
But getting a little older, I understand. I understand the reasons, I know why you need a break. But life is better than that.
Even if you feel the void of life
******* you in, calling you
And all you want to do is give up
Fall down into a ravine
Cut yourself into a river of blood
Cry until the ocean rises
Die
Everything is better
than Suicide.
<3
Dec 2024 · 164
Brothers and Sisters
Vesper Dec 2024
Brothers, we are the foundation of society. Sisters you are the foundation of society. Why can't we work together? Why are you always fighting? O' Brothers and Sisters,
Love.
Dec 2024 · 54
Negative
Vesper Dec 2024
My father tells me to be less negative.

'Just think about the positives,'
He says

But Dad,
How can I focus on the positives,

If there is none?

Negative.
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Dec 2024 · 59
Rainfall
Vesper Dec 2024
At times
It feels like the world is ending.
But when the rain falls
You love more than before.

Rainfall out the window
Pit-Pat Pit-Pat
Wind rustling through the trees.
I feel a breath on my neck
Your love
Because you love more than before

Rainfall.
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Dec 2024 · 49
One Last Dance
Vesper Dec 2024
Dance for the children and dance for the men, dance for the ones who gave their life to save us.
Dance for all the children in pain, with nobody to help them, alone and scared.
Dance for all the people, on the streets, nobody to help them, alone and *****.
Keep dancing, never stop. Never stop.
<3
Dec 2024 · 97
Karate
Vesper Dec 2024
So scared all my life

Anger turned into an art

Don't have to fly kick

To fly again
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Dec 2024 · 38
O' Brother
Vesper Dec 2024
O' Brother
Let me save you from the darkness
Let me save you from the light
Let me save you from the pills
That make you feel alright

Just come along with me
Away from all the people
Away from all the feelings
Away from all the pain

O' Brother
Who caused you this pain
Who caused you this worship
How did all the bad things
Fall back on you

O' Brother
Don't succumb
Don't take the leap
Don't take the pills
Don't load the gun

Just come along with me
And all will be okay
Please believe me
And we'll be at peace

O' Brother
Your funeral was quiet
I wish I knew how bad it was
Why couldn't you tell me
Why didn't you tell me

O' Brother
I'll see you in a flash
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Dec 2024 · 211
Panic Attack
Vesper Dec 2024
Nightfall waits to strike.
Waits to kick you when you're down.
It comes like a army, screams and yells and pain.
Thrashing.
Never stopping to breathe.

Panic Attack.
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Dec 2024 · 90
Failure
Vesper Dec 2024
'God, you're such a failure.'
As if you could do better?

'Can he do anything right?'
One word. Boxing.

'You ruin the entire team!'
Ok, ill just leave you with one less player.'

Failure gives you a chance to fly again.
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Dec 2024 · 1.6k
words
Vesper Dec 2024
words
          flow
                out
                     of my mouth
                                           like droplets
             falling
out                          
                   of
                                         the
          air


falling
f a l l i n g
                                   further
                apart

never
together
again
Dec 2024 · 102
Afghanistan Culture 2
Vesper Dec 2024
afghan traditions
not hard to find
their hospitality is like no other
the food, crisp and light
or fluffy and melting
you know it will be good

assalamu alaikum!
wa alaikum assalaam
you say
it is a greeting of sorts
a way to say hello!

islam
is their religion
belief in the oneness of god
beleif in all

afghanistan
Dec 2024 · 92
Afghanistan Culture
Vesper Dec 2024
rich of culture
vast and far
deep and wide
there is no end
to the beauty of you
dresses and food and colors here
stories and fires and dancing there
so much of it
it never ends
this beautiful place

afghanistan
Dec 2024 · 54
Afghanistan 9/11
Vesper Dec 2024
four hijackers
four planes
four men
four craves for violence
to **** us all
all they wanted from us
was death
and violence

two twins
two twin towers
two twin brothers
two twin planes
horrible
horrible day

one man
one fight
one takeover
one crash
he was a hero
he saved them all
but he died
same as the rest

afghanistan
this is a tribute to 9/11. i salute all the people that died that day, and i am sorry to the families who lost. (my uncle was lost during the 9/11 attacks on the twin towers)
Dec 2024 · 55
Afghanistan 1988
Vesper Dec 2024
osama bin laden
it is the beginning
of the end
al-Qaida  
they killed
the men
the women
the children
and we watched
and let them be

they claimed victory
against the soviets
it was their first win
but sadly
it wasn't their last

so they fought
and fought
and killed
and islam ruled again
but in a different way

afghanistan
Dec 2024 · 172
Afghanistan 1978
Vesper Dec 2024
khan was killed!
we must rejoice
but the communists
fully took over
but then what?
they change to islam?

the islamic properties are key
they practice islam
islam is life

but there is still fighting
fighting over friendship
when will this war end?

afghanistan
school project again
Dec 2024 · 86
Afghanistan 1953
Vesper Dec 2024
they became soviet
just because of him
the bad men
the crazy men
they ruin it all

khan
cousin of the king
becomes the prime
and looks to the soviets
the communists
for help

but not all bad
he allowed the women
to do what they like
care how they look

afghanistan
school project!!
Dec 2024 · 61
Afghanistan 1926
Vesper Dec 2024
he betrayed them
and declared himself king
king of the nation
king of them all
all they hoped
is to not fall

he tried to take
and make the country modern
but nobody agreed
he tried to limit the power
of the national council
but nobody agreed

and they took up arms
so they could fight back
but then he fled
a coward

afghanistan
school project!!
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