I didn’t notice myself changing—
until I did.
One day,
my laugh didn’t echo the same.
My eyes
stopped believing as quickly.

Childhood slipped off
like a sweater in summer
quietly,
forgotten on a chair.

Dreams I swore I’d chase
now gather dust
in unopened folders
and fading notebooks.

The mirror grew honest.
My knees, less kind.
Time,
less patient.

I miss how time once felt—
limitless.
Like I could waste it
and it would wait for me.

Now,
every birthday feels like
a sigh I didn’t mean to let out.

But here I am—
still unfolding,
still becoming,
even if it’s slower now.

Because youth doesn’t vanish,
it just leaves quietly,
with soft hands
and no apology.

i forget, sometimes,
that everyone has their own world
just as full as mine.

...

that ******* the bus,
she always has blue glitter on her eyelids,
she has someone
she cries over
when it rains.

...

and that boy,
who laughs a little too loud in the hallways --
he has a grandmother
she calls him every sunday.
he has a playlist
that he never shares.

...

i forget
that lives unfold around me,
not just mine.
no one else's life
pauses
just because im not
in the same room as them.
they're full of joy,
grief,
midnight cravings,
and rom com dreams
that don't star me.

...

but tonight?
the warm city lights
look like conversations
ill never hear --
and i remeber.

Being unique was never a crack in the mirror—
it’s the golden thread in the world’s plain fabric,
the secret ingredient in a recipe
everyone forgot they needed.

A wheelchair isn’t a cage—
it’s a shopping cart of dreams,
rolling down aisles others never explore,
collecting strength in bulk.

Trees don’t hear the wind—yet they dance with it.
Mountains don’t hear the storm—yet they stand through it.
The moon hears nothing—yet it pulls oceans.
Candles don’t hear prayers—yet they bring light to them.

Dark spots, birthmarks—
don’t hide them.
They are constellations etched by the divine
Those are post-it notes from the universe,
tagged onto your skin so angels can recognize you in crowds.

Ugly?
Who told you that?
A cracked spoon doesn’t ruin the taste of soup.
So why let someone else's broken lens define your reflection?
From whose map are you lost?
Because flowers don’t ask mirrors
if they bloomed correctly.

You are not a flaw.
You are a first edition.
what law have you broken by just being?
When criminals plead for mercy without shame,
why do you, the kindest soul,
hold your own self in chains?

Destiny's policy includes both thunder and calm,
but the question is:
Will you rise from the ashes or let the storm sink your ink?

Do you love yourself enough to bleed truth?
Have you folded lessons into your skin like origami wisdom?
Are you brave enough
to face every fire your choices lit?

If yes—
then crush that "fate" under your feet.
Dip your pen in the ink of your soul.
Tear the script.
Break the rules.
Write a story so fearless
even destiny will pause...
and ask for your autograph.

I don’t know what.
Or, rather—
the matter of fact: why?
Am I pretending?

A pretty dosing,
imposing
i'mposter syndrome
in stolen lip gloss and rope burns.

Don’t ask me to put on these masks.
I’m done with it.

Every thought is scrutinized.
Every meal, a moral panic.
“Every time I eat another animal, you spank my *** hard.”
(Not that I want to eat an animal
every time I want a spanking—
no.
But I do want a spanking.
And not the guilt buffet.)
Mind: Reported.

"*******"
Mind: Swagger.

Am I my brain’s pet?
Or is it mine?

Russes
is a nice dog name.

Am I becoming a killing machine?
No.
I’d have to work out more.
That’s extroverted thinking.

Inside?
What are you?

An amoeba.
Shapeshifting.
Gelatinous.
Unapologetically not solid.

Enough!
You are dead!

Come on,
I’m not wallowing—
I just want to cry
after so long
in *******
with no aftercare.

I miss you so much, Bubba.

I am
a ******* *******.
I feel
maniacal.

Do you know
you can give yourself a hug?
It feels so good.

I’m asking,
“What’s that you do again?”

A shirt.
Curiosity outweighed my fears.
Isn’t there a cat
who got killed because of it?

I met a woman
Who taught me
How to find someone
I used to be

Neighbors are arguing

I am uncomfortably

Smoking a cigarette

Trying not to listen to them

Trying instead to focus on this podcast

About militarized police

And how democracies end