I'm digging a hole deep and wide
I'll bury my love for you inside
then I'll fill it in, right to the top
and stamp it down, in hope to stop
these feelings that stumble from my core
and silence them forever more.

I'm building a wall as high as I might
behind it I'll hide my heart and my light
some stones once removed, now back, standing tall
they'll keep me within and forbid me to fall.

I'll paint on my smile, cherry red beaming wide
I'll laugh when expected, though empty inside
I'll move through this life like I haven't a care
but if you look closely
You'll see I'm not there.

Your love is so opulent and rare
I can't help but gape at the thought
The thought of that love being mine
When other girls must gibe at the thought
The thought of that love belonging to another
I must say
Before you my emotions were unkempt
They weren't properly maintained
And to be honest I'm not even sure what my emotions even were
I even think I was too tentative to want to know
And even though I was unkempt and tentative
I often found myself being stolid at times
I was being stolid and unresponsive to my emotions
But stolid was something I used
Yes that's right I used it
I used it to guise my emotions
I used it as a cover a mask to keep my emotions hidden
Not now
Not anymore
Now I have fortitude towards my emotions and it's all because of you
You took your opulent and rare love and used it as a grenade to break my four walls I worked so hard to build

I feel so alive
The ground beneath my feet,
the air surrounding me,
and the sky above me.

I relax calmly throughout my days
with the warmth of a mans arms around me
He keeps me company

I like the feeling of the sun shining on me
its warmth is soothing
but it does not compare to the warmth given when he kisses me

**** those kiss
so tinder
so innocent
so wrong, but right all at the same time

He makes me feel alive
Before he appeared into my life
I was broke down in a puddle of heartbreaks and scars
I was as weak and unstable as veneer

But now I feel so alive
The ground beneath my feet,
the air surrounding me,
and the sky above me.

I believe that you can only love what you got while you got it and once it's gone, it's gone. You have to learn to let go. Nothing is forever.